The Fallen Portrait
by BlinkByou
Summary: Kairi is a shy brainy teenager and Riku the hot jock. What happens when Kairi gets her wish of having a boyfriend, only to have that wish shattered? And what of the chocolate haired gothic artist with a corrupt past? AU and OOC. R&R.
1. Prologue

Little Wishes

So here I am. Sitting here in my new room in a new town with a new family. I can't say that it is at all that wonderful. In fact, it's hell. Somewhere along my train of lonesome thoughts I've come to really ask myself a question. _Why is my life so downright wretched? _I already know the answer. It all comes down to the one word that has ruined my life, that one word I just can't get away from, that one word that prevents me from making and or keeping friends. Shyness. Oh how I loathe that word yet I love it at the same time. It's something to hide behind, whenever people ask about why I won't talk all I have to do is reply with the ever popular, "I'm shy, that's all." But you know, I'm pretty darn sick of being shy, and so is the rest of my new 'family' if you can call them one.

My mom decided out of the blue that she was going to marry this freak of a man that is now my legal "Dad." Why she decided to up and get married after knowing the man for only three weeks I don't know. Why she decided to marry him when she knew four kids were included in that package I will never know. All I know is that she didn't think of me, and that's where I am now.

So yeah, hopefully you get my problem. Sometime I don't even know what to think anymore. My mom getting married, us moving from our old island into this busy crap filled one, my shyness, my hopes to find my 'one true love.' I really don't know. Sometimes I wish I could just fall asleep and never wake up. Just you know, be alive but dead at the same time.

Oh crap, there I go being emotional again. I had better stop writing now; today's the first day of school. I think I'm ready, I think I'll be alright and make new friends, and maybe…find a boyfriend. Heck and the only thing running through my head now is this exact opposite: _Tough luck failure._


	2. Doodles

Doodles. They litter my pages filling up the margins and some of the lines. I drive myself mad sometimes, I can't control myself. The doodles are my fears, jumbled up and horridly sketched across the page. I'm a crazy artist who doesn't know limits. Yeah, that's who I am. They're silly, weird, stupid. That's what they call them. But no, they are jewels. Broken and red they are, but jewels none the less. Most importantly they're mine, the only thing I've ever owned. Mine. My drawings. My input. My mind. Everything else in my life is out of control, yet I can control them. Make them my own, make them evil, good, sadistic pure. Mine. My own.

There goes the bell, time to close up the control and get back to reality. Yeah. My reality. My hell.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Class I'd like to introduce you to our new student, Kairi Henry." Mr. Hiskarky mumbled boringly. The students looked the new student up and down. Said girl blushed uncontrollably and looked at her feet. _"Why must they always stare...?" _She thought to herself. Kairi could swear she was going to die here. Not a sound was made as all eyes were directed to her. "Class...?" Mr. Hiskarky mumbled a little bit louder, urging the students to answer. The students payed no heed and kept on with their consistent staring. Kairi was now visibly shaking under the attention. She hated standing up in front of an unwanted audience who in deed made it clear that she was not wanted here. "Class, say hello." Mr. Hiskarky grumbled, getting annoyed. The class stared for a few more seconds and then a couple of the kids mumbled a hello. Kairi only blushed harder. This was so embarrassing.

"Thank you class. Now Kairi, you can have a seat next to Namine Shimane. Namine raise your hand so Kairi knows where to sit." Kairi looked up quickly, searching the class for the girl named Namine. Mr. Hiskarky had left and was now getting his materials out of his desk. There was a dead silence. Kairi blushed and started to sweat nervously when no girl raised her hand. Kairi was about to turn and run for the door when finally, a girl raised her hand. But then two more raised their hands, then seven more, until all the girls in the classroom had their hands raised. Kairi fell pale. _"This is some sick joke, how am I supposed to know which one is Namine?" _

"Kairi, have a seat." Mr. Hiskarky grumbled, not looking up from what he was doing. "U-um..." Kairi started. "I don't want to hear it, just sit down already." Mr. Hiskarky almost yelled. The class snickered. Some of the boys started making weird sounds, and some of the ditzy girls started whispering."M-mr. Hiskarky, I don't know which one is Namine." Mr. Hiskarky grumbled loudly. "Silly girl, she's raising her hand right there!" Kairi looked back at the class and to her dismay; only one girl was raising her hand. Namine. A ditzy, popular looking blond girl who was busy whispering to her group of friends. The group burst out laughing and Namine laughed, turning her head to Kairi and flipping her wavy blond hair with a smirk.

"I-I'm sorry." Kairi stuttered before quickly, running to the empty seat next to Namine. But the embarrassment had not ended there. A red headed boy quickly stuck out his foot and before Kairi could see it she tripped in fell, her books flying across the room. The class broke out in shouts of laughter and hooting. Kairi closed her eyes trying not to cry, but to no avail the tears fell. _"Stupid, stupid, stupid! I'm so stupid." _Kairi quickly stood up and grabbed for her books, keeping her eyes down as the tears fell. _"History...math...English...biology...where is my chemistry book?" _Kairi thought to herself. She lifted her face up looking for her book and was met smack dad with a pair of aqua blue eyes. "Looking for this?" The owner of the eyes asked handing her her chemistry book. "Um yeah, thanks...a lot." Kairi whispered, giving a watery smile. "No problem." The owner answered leaning back in his chair. The girls across the room suddenly got quiet, and Kairi suddenly figured that this guy had to be pretty popular. The boy was the player type. A god in his words. He had shoulder length silver hair, the most beautiful eyes you could ever dream of and to boot a fit body. He was hot. He knew it. And he used his hotness to the best of his ability.

_"Wow...he is so hot...and nice...and...Whoa, get a hold of yourself girl."_ Kairi quickly erased her thoughts and ran to her chair before the teacher started yelling at her. The class was still snickering and Kairi was still blushing when the teacher began his lesson. Kairi quickly organized her books and grabbed out some notebook paper to begin taking notes on her favorite subject, algebra. Kairi was in an advanced algebra class, the same level as the juniors. She was proud of this, but did not know that this skill that she had was ultimately to her disadvantage. Kairi was so busy taking notes that she didn't notice the blonde girl next to her who was busy gossiping to her friends.

The blonde, like the silver head boy, was extremely popular. She was the richest girl in the school, an only child, and a self proclaimed goddess. She had to get everything she wanted, when she wanted it, and how she wanted it, no buts at all. She loved putting people in their places and stepping over them. It was her ultimate goal in life to be the chick everyone loved to hate.

"Hey. Hello...? Look at me!" Namine yelled, swiping Kairi's notebook away. "U-um, I need that, please hand it back." Namine only smirked, and threw the notebook over to one of her friends. "Yah, right. Now listen up, I know you're new, and I want to make a proposition. You obey my every word and I'll allow you to sit here. You don't, I'll make your life hell. Got it? Get it? Good." Kairi looked at the girl then looked nervously at her hands. _"Oh god, what do I do..." _She thought to herself. "U-um, I can't do that." She finally replied. Namine stared. Kairi gulped. Wrong move.

"Ok then, you pick hell. Easy enough choice." She stated before turning back to her own notes. Kairi looked at her hands. She had nothing left to do put try to memorize everything the dull teacher wrote and said because she knew she was not going to be getting that notebook back.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The bell rang knocking Kairi out of her thoughts. She inwardly kicked herself for not listening or taking mental notes. Kairi had spent the whole class dreaming about the silver headed god across the room. She was infatuated. No, obsessed. He was like her dream man, the one who would come and sweep her off her feet. She knew she had no chance with him, but at least she could dream.

Kairi gathered her books quickly and made for the door. Her next class was art, one of her least favorite classes. Kairi waited quietly as the popular kids walked through the door first. She didn't want to give them any reason to pick on her again. Namine flounced by, shoving Kairi whilst throwing her shimmery hair from side to side. "Remember my promise, scum." She stated loudly, her friends giggling from behind. Kairi flushed in anger and quickly stomped out the door after Namine. Kairi was so furious that she didn't even watch where she was going and slammed into a person right as she entered the door of her art class. Kairi looked up quickly as her books flew from her arms the second time that day. This time she was met with a pair of piercing blue troubled eyes. And for some reason Kairi couldn't take her eyes of them.

They belonged to boy about her height. Wild spiky chocolate hair framed his face, most of it hidden by a black beanie, and his beautiful blue eyes were outlined in black eyeliner. His clothing mirrored the eyeliner in a loose hoodie which sported the words "The Fallen Failure" scribbled in white, and his pants baggy with dozens of chains hanging off the side. Kairi was usually weary of "the gothic freaks" which her mom described them of, but this one had a certain air she couldn't place. Like he was afraid, nervous maybe. Kairi didn't realize she was staring when the boy turned away from her and headed to the back of the room, hiding himself behind an easel. Like a shadow hiding from itself.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Doodles, drawings. Whatever you call them. They scrawl out over my arm. This time they're lines. They're blood red. My favorite. I'm creating a scene. My scene. My mind. Twisted. Yeah. I think I'll draw some more, this time on my other arm. Up to my elbow maybe. Yeah. More red lines, more doodles, more pain. Next time I'll paint white. Over the purple on my face. Yeah, white. Or maybe I'll paint red. No, that'll cause a scene. Not my scene, theirs. Or maybe I'll paint black. Yeah. Black. Over my heart. And then I'll draw a crooked line down the middle. Yeah. That's what I'll do. A line. A red line.


	3. Drawings

A/N: Hey everybody. Thanks for those who have reviewed! I love reviews. If you read this story, please review it only takes a few seconds and I appreciate any feedback. Thanks again.

ooOOoo

Drawings. Not doodles. Drawings. They litter the rooms of my mind. Different ones. Scenes of my life. I''ve locked those doors. Nothing and nobody can get in or out. My drawings are dead. Gone. Memories. They''re forgotten. Never to be brought back. They're mine. Nobody elses. The drawings are sick. They are wrong. My wrong. My sin. My life. Drawings paint a picture. I have no picture left. My drawings are pieces of a puzzle that will never be put together because the last piece is missing. My heart. My heart is black I've been told. It should fit the puzzle. But for some reason. It won't.

ooOOoo

The bell rang and Kairi quickly gathered her books and ran for an empty seat in her classroom. The room was already making her sick. Art was not where she exceled and art rooms only reminded her of this. "Hey!" A hyper voice yelled. Kairi nearly fell out of her seat a peppy brown headed girl in a yellow dress jumped into the seat next to hers. "You're new, huh?" She asked holding out her hand. Kairi blinked and then smiled. This girl, though frighteningly hyper, seemed nice. The first nice person, besides the super hot silver head in her last class, she had met. "Yeah, I am. I'm Kairi." She said, shaking the girls hand. The girl smiled and giggled. "I'm Selphie. Hey, so did you like move here or something?" Kairi nodded, pulling art her art binder. "Ummhmm, a couple of weeks ago." The girl smiled. "Sweet. So what classes do you have?" She said slamming her books down on the table making the whole class jump in suprise. "Oh just the basics. Math, biology, chemistry..." Kairi started. "Those are bor-ing!" Selphie said rolling her eyes. "Why aren't you takin' something fun like drama?" Kairi shuddered. Of all the classes and extra curricular activites she had ever taken, drama was the worst. All she could remember was throwing up in front of the who school in the Shakespear play, Romeo and Juliet. And she didn't even have a main part; in fact, she only had one line.

"Um, lets just say drama is not my forte." Kairi said glancing around, wondering where the teacher was. "Whatev, hey, wanna have lunch together?" Selphie asked pulling out a stick of gum. "Want some?" Kairi turned back to Selphie and smiled. "Sure, and sure." She said giggling. In truth Kairi was more than relieved that Selphie had asked her to eat with her. Kairi was terrified of cafeterias and even more terrified of being alone in one. Taking a piece of gum Kairi leaned back in her chair and finally relaxed for the first time that day. She was thanking god for Selphie's existence in her life when the teacher, a strict looking man with dark black hair walked in. The whole class groaned. Kairi took this as a bad sign.

"Good morning class. My name is Mr. Brown, I'm your substitute teacher for the week. Mrs. Classy is out with the stomache flu. Again." The whole class groaned again. Kairi looked over at Selphie who was busy banging her head into the desk. Kairi looked at the rest of the class who seemed to all be doing the same thing. "Alright class, lets get down to business. I need to know names. When I call out your name stand upand say it back to me so I know who you are." Mr. Brown said picking up a list. "Tidus Nomura?" Kairi saw a blond headed boy stand up grungily while roling his eyes. "Tidus Nomura." He said before sitting back down. "Selphie Tilmitt." Selphie stood up quickly. " Selphie Tilmitt." She said between smacks, then sat down. The class proceeded like this until everyone had stood and given their name. That is except Kairi. "Kairi Henry, new student, hmm?" The teacher asked looking at the list. "Um, yeah." Kairi said quietly. "Ok, please stand and give your name." Kairi stood shakily and swallowed the bile that was coming up her throat. "K-kairi Henry." She muttered quickly and sat down. "Ok...good! I think that's it. Let's get started class. Today we'll be studying the art of triangles, and why they are so wonderful." The class giggled in spite of themselves but shut their mouths when the sub looked their way. Just by that look Kairi knew that this class was going to be a long boring one and she couldn't wait till the semester was over.

ooOOoo

"Oh my gosh!" Selphie yelled as she pushed her way out of the art rooms door. "I thought it would never end!" She groaned sticking five pieces of gum into her mouth. Kairi giggled at her new friend and motioned for her to come over to where she was. Selphie stood up and hopped over. Selphie walked over just in time to see the silver headed hottie walk past, with a few friends, a trail of girls following. Kairi pointed at him when he passed and smiled girlishly. "He is so hot." She whispered. Selphie nodded vigourously. "Hottest guy in the school. Too bad I don't have any classes with him." Kairi giggled. "I have a class with him." Selphie gasped and shook Kairi's shoulders vigorously "Oh my gosh you do!?! How old are you? What class is it! Can I visit!" She yelled all at once. Kairi giggled again. "I'll tell you on the way to lunch."She said walking in the cafeteria's direction. Selphie ran to catch up. "Tell me!" She yelled. "Ok, so I'm in advanced math. Looks like I got placed in a class with the Juniors. And he's in it. By the way, what's his name?" She asked the ecstatic Selphie. "Riku. His name is Riku. Isn't it beautiful?" She said as they walked into the cafeteria. "Oh yeah." Kairi whispered, her head in the clouds.

Kairi and Selphie made their way to an empty table and started chatting about anything under the sun when a group of tough looking kids started to form a circle in the back of the cafeteria. "Oh great..." Selphie muttered looking up from her lunch. "What is it?" Kairi asked looking at the kids. Selphie groaned and put her fork down. "They're picking on someone. And If I didn't know any better it's probably that goth kid." Kairi searched her brain looking for any goth kids she had seen today only one appeared. The boy with the troubled ocean blue eyes. "Is it the guy in our art class?" Kairi asked quietly. "Yeah him. He's always getting picked on. It's no big deal. You just forget about it."She said turning back to her lunch. Kairi didn't however. What Selphie had said troubled her. How can you say being picked on is no big deal? She knew by experience that it hurt a lot. Physically, yes but emotionally much more. Kairi looked back at the group of teens, they were laughing pushing around a person in the middle. Kairi got a glimpse of the person for a second and Selphie was in fact right. It was the boy. Kairi noticed something about him though. Most people who were picked on fought back. Most people who were picked on showed some emotion. Mostly fear or anger. But this boy showed nothing. Nothing at all. A blank look was on his face. His eyes empty of any emotion. It was like he was dead. Like someone or something had killed his heart and all that was left was a shell.

ooOOoo

Drawings. Weird. Odd. Mine. They stole them and tore them. Shredded them till they were nothing. They tore up my studio. My mind. Nothing is left but shreds. They're just drawings. They can be repaired they say. They can't. They were unique. They were mine. And no matter how much you try you can't replace what cannot be replaced. My drawings were mine. My own. They were my memories. Now they're gone. Being ripped down everyday. The drawings are nothing to them. They do not care. I care. I don't care. I don't feel. Haha. Today I created a new drawing. It is one of my heart. I painted it black and it has a red crooked line down the middle. The line hurts. It rips my flesh. I don't care. I have my line. My red line. My drawing. I drew my line. Nobody else did. Nobody can take away my pain. That's cause I created it. My self picture. My portrait.


	4. Images

A/N: Sorry for not updating in awhile! Thanks for the comments. And

xoRaining Diamondsox thanks for the advice on the paragraphs. Didn't know people got confused by that. Anyways, thanks again!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Photographs. Photos. Images taken to stop time. Images taken in order to hold on to the past. Images that are special. Images that are funny, spiritual, romantic. Images of places and people that no longer exist. Images are there to keep you sane with remembrance. Then again, they're there to drive you insane with a need to have what is never coming back. No one knows the power of an image, a memory. No one. I have an image written on my heart. It's me. It's my makers. And it's something I'm never going to get back. You could call it remembrance, sadness, despair, but in my eyes it's simply _lust_.

Riku Wakayama his name was. But in his eyes he was merely Riku, The God of all Gods. He was vain, tricky, a player, and down right smooth. He knew how to get what he wanted when he wanted it.

Riku was a rich teen, spoiled since day one on this planet. His father a doctor, his mother a lawyer, and Riku a slob. He had no siblings, well, that is if you didn't count his foster brother. His beloved, beautifully ugly, hated little foster brother. He was the one thing that ruined Riku's almost perfect life. He hated having to go places as a family and having to tug the little sack of lard around with him. He wanted to be the star of the show. Always. Though only positive effect of having his foster brother get all the attention was because it was negative. His foster brother was hated, plain and simple. Riku hated him, Riku's father hated him, His mother too; so why keep him around? Who the heck knows.

Nobody at school knew the boy was his foster brother. He kept that a well hidden secret, a secret he meant to keep until he graduated.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Riku!" An annoying voice yelled interrupted the silver haired teen's thoughts.

"What?" He answered, lifting his head up from his arms.

"Look who's getting beat up, yah?" One of his friends, Wakka, said pointing one of his fries in the direction of a gathering crowd.

Riku looked over and grinned. Ah, his arch-rival. Goth boy. The one and only goth in the school.

"It's about time someone mess him up. Nobody's picked on him since yesterday morning." He stated watching the little event take place.

"No duh, yah. Hope they don't get caught this time." Wakka said. Throwing a couple of fries at one of cheerleaders near their table. The girl squealed and started yelling angrily. Wakka laughed and stuffed his face full of fries, waiting for Riku's answer.

"If they do, I'm gonna stick up for 'em. Somebody has to put that punk in his place." Riku said laughing slightly at the cheerleaders.

Oh yeah. Somebody had to put that punk in his place; but he wanted to be the one to do it. He'd let them have their fun, but ultimately, the boy's pride was his.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Selphie….Selphie….Selphie!" Kairi yelled trying to get her friend's attention.

"Huh!? What?! Where?!" Selphie yelled, snapping out of her daydream of Riku and Her eating strawberries and whipped cream together. It was lovely, and she couldn't help but be furious at Kairi for interrupting her.

"Whadaya want Kairi, I was having a good daydream!" Selphie yelled angrily, stuffing her mouth full of gum. Kairi gulped, nervously. Selphie had just pushed a whole role of bubble tape into her mouth and was now chomping on it like a cow.

"Um, shouldn't we do something about that?" She said quietly, taking her eyes away from Selphie and pointing towards the scene that was quickly getting very brutal.

"Do something? Why'd we go and do a crazy thing like that?" Selphie said a little bit too loudly, causing some heads to turn in annoyance.

"Why? That guys getting beat up for goodness sakes! That's horrible." Kairi said a little enraged at the fact that nobody would help the kid out. It appeared to her that the kid had no friends, or if he did, none of them cared about him enough to stick up for him.

"Well then why don't you go stop it?" Selphie asked, actually showing some seriousness for a second.

"I-I….don't…think I can. I'm shy…that's all." Kairi whispered saying her usually phrase with a grimace. She couldn't believe herself. Always expecting someone else to stop or start stuff. Why didn't she just go up there and stop it? Why was she always in the background wishing for a change but not strong enough to make it happen? It was always like this, and Kairi felt guilty. Dead guilty.

"The point." Selphie stated matter-of-factly. "Now, are you going to eat those fries or what?" She asked taking one from Kairi's plate.

Kairi smiled trying to look natural and told her she could have the rest, she wasn't hungry anymore. All she could do was nod and say yes or no when Selphie talked to her; all the while watching the dreadful scene a few yards away.

_RING!_

A large sigh from every one of the kids in the lunchroom was heard when the lunch bell rang as the signal for the end of lunch. It was time to head back to the dreary classes, the strict and or stupid teachers, and loads of awaiting homework.

"So Kairi, what's your next class?" Selphie said grabbing her stuff and heading towards the exit.

"Biology, you?" Kairi answered also grabbing her stuff. She really didn't want to be late in getting to her next class so she sped a little bit ahead of Selphie.

"Chemistry. Yuck." Selphie said spitting her gum into a nearby trashcan. Kairi gulped. Selphie sure did look like a horse when she chewed gum. She even spit like one.

"Guess I'll see you around Selphie." Kairi said waving at her new friend as she walked into the hallway heading towards her Biology Lab. Kairi's thoughts where overrun with feelings of pity and sadness towards the goth kid in the other room. Her heart hurt for him and it was starting to bother her. She quickly erased the boy from her thoughts as she entered her next classroom. But they weren't gone for long.

The final bell rang as the teacher walked into the room and sat in her chair. She was friendly looking, young, and attractive. She had a nice smile and seemed to be well liked as a couple of whistles where heard around the room when she walked in. She walked up to Kairi quickly and introduced herself.

"Hello, my name is Tifa. You must be Kairi right?" The woman said smiling widely.

"Yes, that's me." Kairi answered smiling back as she pulled out her Biology lab book and a notebook.

"Good. I'm glad to have you here. I hope you'll enjoy my class." Tifa said, smiling once again before walking back to the front of the class.

"Ok class-" She started, but was interrupted when someone walked quietly into the room.

It was no one but the goth kid. Kairi gulped and looked at her desk. Guilt swam to heart again after seeing the bruises that were scattered over the boys face, the black eye, and the weird way he was holding his left arm as if it were broken; it probably was.

"Oh my god! Sora are you alright!?" Tifa yelled rushing over to the teen. She placed her hand on his shoulder as if for comfort only to have it be brushed away slightly.

"I'm fine, Tifa. Don't send me to the nurse." Kairi could barely make out. The boy's voice was soft and sounded like it was weighed down in sorrow. She just realized that the boy hadn't said his name in art class for some strange reason.

"Ok, just be careful ok…?" Tifa said still looking worried and angered.

"Whatever." Was the reply as Sora walked quickly but silently to the back of the room. Everyone in the room had gotten quiet when the chocolate haired boy had walked through the door, but now the voices picked up as the boy was once again ignored and placed out of the minds of the whole class except for Kairi.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kairi couldn't make out the boy. _"Sora….a name that means blue sky….He is nothing like the blue sky." _Kairi thought quietly to herself. He was like a rain cloud in the middle of the bright blue sky. He didn't fit in, and he cried rain that none of the normal clouds cared about. He was the rain everyone ignored and the rain everyone hated for ruining their sunny days. He was so different, but yet he was the same.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Photos. They're like that. They make your mind think strange things. Make you go crazy with want. Like my lust for my past. I want it so bad I'm crazy. Or insane as they put it. I'm a freak who lives by the darks images; they're the only ones that aren't snapped in time. The dark is always there. Never to disappear. Because without the dark we would all die. Nobody can stand the light for too long. Everyone needs a time to hide. Hide their sorrows, pain, anger, guilt. Their sin. That's what the dark is for. It gives peace to the restless. And hope for the damned. That's my image. My saying. I live by those words, so that whenever the light gets to be too much, I'll always have the dark to turn to. My shady image. My lust.


	5. Lesson 1: Happiness

It figures sometimes. Life. "Paint a time in your life when you were truly happy." I laugh. A sick twisted little laugh. I'm not your average kid so you've found out. Happy? Nah, I've never known happy. All of my happiness has been taken away. Every. Single. Time. It makes me sad. It makes me furious. It makes me want to kill. But what did killing ever do huh? Killing took away my makers leaving me to survive in this damned world. Killing took away my beloved friend. Killing took away my sanity. Killing took away my soul. So why does it appeal? "Paint a time in your life when you were truly happy" Truly happy huh? Here's my picture: Crimson. All over my face. My hands. My crimson. And there's a smile stitched across my face. I'm happy. Almost. Because I almost killed myself. Killing has always appealed to me. But not towards anyone else. Killing myself, now that would make me truly happy. And I almost got what I wanted. Almost. Killing took away everything I was. So why not let the shell rest with the soul?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Class, because I just got news that your teacher will be out for a few months on god knows what, we're going to start a new series of art projects. How exciting?!" The excited looking substitute teacher yelled jumping up and down to try and prove to the class that this was going to be as exciting as he was ugly.

The class groaned in annoyance and started chatting aimlessly with each other.

"Oh my gosh, Kairi...this is horrible." Selphie said between smacks. It was Kairi's second week of school, and so far everything was going well. Being a freshman in a new school was a lot easier with Selphie and a bunch of her friends constantly by your side.

"Yeah really?" Kairi muttered biting the nail on her little finger nervously. So far Kairi hadn't passed one homework assignment in this class and her parents were furious. Her mother, having always had a great love of art, expected Kairi to complete this class with an A+ and nothing less.

"Gosh I can't stand this class. You've only failed three assignments Kairi. I've failed them all!"

"Attention class!" The sub yelled, his face turning tomato red in fury causing his whole balding head to look like an actual tomato. "The series is about emotions. We will be painting emotions. How exciting?!"

The class stared at one another. Some yelled. A couple of them cussed. Most moaned in grief. And a few cried in despair.

"Our first emotions will be happiness! To make this first assignment easy, I want you all to paint a time in your life when you were truly happy. This assignment will be done in today's class time, as will all of these. How exciting! You get to get your grades back sooner! Oh, and you will display your art in front of the class and explain what you tried to portray in your picture. Got it, get it, good! How exciting, now get to work!"

The students slowly stood up and made their way over to the pile of blank canvases in the back of the room.

"What are you going to draw Kairi?" Selphie asked, picking up two canvases. One for herself and one for Kairi.

"Thanks. Um, I don't really know...maybe when I was a flower girl for my aunt's wedding." Kairi bit her little finger again making her way back to her seat.

"Cool...um, I think I'm going to draw when I got my puppy, scooter." Selphie said setting up her easel.

"Nice..." Kairi muttered sitting down and staring at the canvas. "How in the world am I supposed to draw this...and in only one hour!"

Kairi picked up a thick paintbrush and dipped it into the black paint sitting on the side of her easel.

"Use a smaller paintbrush. That's for filling." A soft voice said. Kairi sat up quickly, barely saving her canvas from the dripping paintbrush. She looked around the room but couldn't locate the owner of the voice.

"Hey Kai, what's got you upset?" Selphie said between smacks, looking over at her friend.

"Oh uh, nothin' thought I heard something."

"Oh, Kai, don't go schizo on me now. What do you think, be honest now." Selphie said nodding to her canvas.

Kairi looked at the picture and gulped. "Selphie...the dog looks like a cow and you look like a dog."

Selphie looked at the picture. "Really? Huh, I thought it looked pretty good...oh well. Guess I failed another one."

"Well uh...try to fix it...?" Kairi said quietly.

"Meh, no harm trying."

Kairi picked up smaller brush taking the advice of the mysterious voice and dipped it into the black paint. "Okay...what now?" Kairi said, wishing the voice would answer.

"Make light, small strokes, try not to move your hand to much, move your arm..." The voice said quietly.

Kairi gulped and looked around again hoping to find the owner of the voice again. All of the students however appeared to be busy with their project and none were looking her way.

Kairi listened to the voice and made small light strokes, her picture was slowly coming to life. And it looked pretty good actually. "Ok..." She said quietly, silently begging the voice to help her out again.

"When you draw a face make very light strokes...don't overdue the emotions...make it simple and clean..."

Kairi smiled to herself and followed directions. She usually did overdue the face when drawing. She made small light lines, biting her lip in concentration as the face came to light. It was pretty good, not perfect, but definitely grade deserving good. "Done with that..." She said biting her lip again.

"When you draw hair you draw from the roots...hair isn't pasted on to the head...draw individual lines..." The voice whispered barely noticeable under the loud chatter of the other students.

Kairi held her breath and rinsed off her brush. She placed it in a new color; dark crimson red. She then followed the directions once more and in no time the figure in her drawing had a full head of red hair.

And so the class went on, the voice giving Kairi directions and Kairi eagerly following them.

"Times up class. Whatever you have, please bring to the front."

Kairi looked up in surprise. Class had gone by so fast! Kairi looked at her drawing and smiled. It was good. No it was great, at least for her. On the canvas stood a miniature Kairi with a mint green dress decorated in pink rose flowers. A little garland of flowers sat above her head. Before Kairi stood up she wrote two words on the canvas hoping the owner of the voice would see it.

Kairi brought her drawing up to the front of the room and placed it with the rest. She took the time to look around and see what her fellow classmates had drawn. There were numerous blank canvases. A couple of canvases with stick figures on them. Selphie's dog/cow creation. A bunch of paintings she couldn't make out. A few good ones. And lastly a downright perverted one. At the end however stood a very dark and morbid picture. It was of a boy who's had a hoody on that was shielding his eyes, a smile that appeared to be stitched on was in place of his lips and blood poured from the stitched. A puddle of blood surrounded the boy in what appeared to be suicide from the knife in the boy's hand.

Kairi shuddered and felt the room become a little colder as she looked at the picture. She had no doubt who it belonged to. It was Sora. She knew it. She searched out the boy who was busy putting his paint supplies away in the back of the room. Something was wrong with this kid. Something terribly wrong. Was there even a spirit in the boy?

"Alright now. Steve you're first." The teacher drawled, eyeing the morbid painting in shock. In fact, everyone was.

Kairi moved her attention away from Sora and paid attention to the drawings and the 'meanings' behind them. Steve, a student with a blank canvas explained that the picture expressed what he was at birth. A baby who had done no wrong. And that was when he was truly happy. Turns out that all the students with the blank canvases all had the same theory.

Kairi nearly jumped from excitement when the teacher looked at hers. "Why Miss Kairi...what have we here?" The teacher asked in surprise. Selphie gasped in aw, barely able to keep her mouth off the ground.

"Uh..um...it's just m-me...at my aunt's w-wedding when I-I was younger."

"Well I must say this is pretty amazing. You've greatly improved from...yesterday...wow." The teacher muttered in surprise. "Well, you should expect to get a good grade on this assignment Kairi. However, may I ask why you wrote "Thank you" at the top?"

"Oh um...I-I wanted to thank the person w-who helped me d-do this..."

"Oh, the person who helped you become a better artist? That's me isn't it?"

"Uhh...not e-exactly...um..."

"Hey look, we have to leave in five minutes, sub, hurry it up!" Selphie yelled, trying to help Kairi out.

"Oh yes, sorry. Anyways...Sora...your next." The teacher said quietly glancing at the boy in slight fear.

"Heh. Picture clearly gets the message across." Sora said quietly, looking every student in the eye. "Doesn't it?" He finished with a smirk.

The class fell into an uncomfortable silence, the students looking at each other for help.

The bell rang after a few seconds and the class ran hurriedly to the door, needing to get away from the creepy goth kid. The sub cleared his throat loudly. "Ok class, do your reading...your grades will be back by tomorrow."

Kairi grabbed her stuff and headed towards the door ignoring Selphie's loud calls. However before she left, she sadly made eye contact with the goth who was slowly picking up his bag. Kairi gulped quietly and turned away trying to block the sight of the boy in front of her who caused her so much inner turmoil. She could not, however block out the words that he uttered in his quietly eerie voice.

"Your welcome."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I've learned through the years that happiness is a foax . Happiness makes me scared. I do not understand it. Others I have seen have this happiness. They exploit it. They love it. How I wish I could be like them sometimes. Be who they are. Accepted. Loved. Yet if I was ever one of them, I'd turn into the very thing I hate. And I can't have that can I? Heh, my life is so messed up it makes me just want to fall of the face of this earth and rot in hell. But then I'd be going to the very place I hate. And I can't have that can I? Confused? Yeah. So am I.


	6. Fangirls, bets, bullies and a Goth

A/N: Really long chapter here, sorry. :) Anyways, hope you all enjoy this chapter, it sets up the majority of the plot for my story so it had to be long. Anyways, thanks to all who reviewed, and please review again!

There were flowers at her funeral. Dark purple, almost black flowers. Their were roses, dark purple, almost black roses. And there were thorns. Millions of thorns. Choking the lovely roses...yet the flowers lived. She was a rose. Beautiful, sweet, and alluring...yet every rose has it's thorn they say. I watched as she died. She couldn't fight it. They had ruined her, and she was just barely holding on. Yet she smiled. She smiled. At me. She said I was a flower, her flower, and I had no thorns. Nothing to bring me down. If only she knew. I wish to be the rose, the beauty with the sting of death attached. I want to have the thorns, I want my burdens. My woes. They're there to punish, and lord knows I need it. But she said I was a flower. So that is who I am. I am the flower, the trampled flower, with it's petals pulled of in glee and it's body forgotten. The dandelion that everyone hates. The flower everyone wants to destroy. The flower that is hated because it can't stand with the others. Yeah. I carry my woes in seeds that blow in the wind when my inner self is revealed. I could never be a rose. Roses outshine their sin.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Ok class, the next two week you guys will be working on an essay that discusses your favorite mathematician. You'll be paired."

"Mr. Hiskarky, can we pick who we wanna be with." Namine asked eyeing Riku with stars in her eyes. Riku smiled his proud, god-like, girl catching smile and had all the girls in the room drooling in seconds, all almost begging for him to pick one of them.

"They'll be assigned." The teacher drawled looking at his list of pairs.

The class muttered in disgust. The girls however still had their hopes up. One of them could be paired with Riku!

"Namine, you're with Steven."

"What?! I can't be paired with that nerd, look at him!"

Steven smiled gawkily, turning as red as his fiery hair.

"Steven is a perfectly good student. Besides he's good with math. Maybe he'll help you out with your failing grade..." The teacher muttered.

The glass giggled lightly and a few of the boys snickered.

"Oh shut up you fools, at least I'm beautiful unlike any of you...!" Namine yelled in fury, then softened her voice and batted her eyelashes. "Except you Riku..."

Said boy just grinned like a cheshire and whispered something to Wakka who burst out laughing and fell out of his seat.

"What's so funny?!" Namine yelled stomping her foot under her desk.

"Namine that's enough. On with the list..."

Kairi waited on the edge of her seat, as the names were called she noticed that Riku's name or hers hadn't been called off the list.

"Omygosh, omygosh...what if I'm paired with him...omygosh..."

"Riku and...uh...oh yeah, Kari..." The class was silent. There was no Kari in the class.

"I said Riku and Kari." He said looking at Riku and then at Kairi.

"U-um...it's Kairi...if you mean me." Kairi said quietly, turning red.

"Oh yeah, sorry. Riku and Kairi."

The class fell silent again. Kairi felt like she was on cloud nine. That was until Namine looked her way. Yep, she was dead meat.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Ohmygosh Selphie!" Kairi yelled upon entering the cafeteria after their lecture in art. Thank god they didn't have to do another project. For one, Kairi stunk at art. For two, she was scared to death when she found out Sora was her 'teacher'. And for three, she just stunk.

"Yeah?"

"Rikuismypartner!"

"Riku is your pattern...wah?"

"No, Riku Wakayama is my partner for a class assignment in math!"

"You're kidding?! OH MY GOSH! Details girl, details!"

"Ok so yeah we have this paper to do on mathematicians, which is really weird 'cause I've never done anything like that and I don't see why writing a paper on-"

"The heck are you talkin' about, get to the part about Riku!"

"Oh right. So the partners are assigned, and guess what? We're together!" Kairi said squealing.

"OH MY GOSH! This is so big, we could become a part of the popular kids, we could be asked to the christmas dance."

"Ohmygosh, I think I'm gonna go sick Selph..." Kairi whispered.

"Oh crap, don't go sick about that, here comes something that'll really make ya puke."

Kairi looked over to where Selphie was looking to see Namine and her cheerleading squad heading towards their table. Kairi gulped, crossed her heart, and waited for the pain.

"What are you closing your eyes for you bigoted nerd?" Namine said in her 'cool' demeanor. How about ice cold...

"U-um...just got teary eyed...that's all."

"Aww, about what? The fact that I'm going beat the living crap out of you in a few seconds, maybe?"

"Uh...yeah?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Haha, Riku man. You got paired with the grade skippin' freak, yah."

"Meh, like I care who I got paired with..."

"What about Namine, yah?"

"Heh, that man-eating chick, no way."

"You know you like her man."

"Well maybe I do, that's no business of yours."

"Shyeah, it is man, we've been pals since...I dunno 1st grade yah?"

"2nd Wakka, we ain't that close..."

"Yeah yeah, I really believe you man. N'ways, when you gonna get started on that paper, yah?"

"I dunno, hopefully she'll do all the work...I don't have time to write any crappy math paper."

"Looks like the type to me, yah."

"Well duh, she skipped two grades."

"Pft. Suck up nerd."

"You got it..."

"Hey Riku...?"

"Yeah?"

"You know that Christmas dance is coming up, yah?"

"Uh huh."

"I dare you to ask the nerd out."

The boys at the table who had been listening in on the conversation of the Great Riku and his Head Butler Wakka snickered in interest.

"You what?"

"I dare you."

"Me too." Another one of Riku's friend said. The other's agreed.

"What the- I can't show up with her. I'm the captain of the football team. My rep would be lost."

"Who says you have to show up with her. Just ask her out on a couple of dates, get her to fall madly in love with you, and then have her meet you at the dance and show her up. Have a girl with you to really make it memorial. She'll be heartbroken."

"Well...that isn't too bad...heh, fine I'll take you up on that bet. I get $100 dollars if it works out, each of you will pitch in." He couldn't back out on a bet. He'd look like a coward and he couldn't have that.

Some of the boys groaned and looked at their wallets.

"And if it doesn't work?" One boy asked slyly.

"Then..."

"Then what, Riku?"

"Then I'll pay each of you $50 bucks."

"Wow, placing a lot on this bet, yah?"

"Pft, I'm rich, it's nothing."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Where is it kid?!"

"Where is what...?"

"My money!"

"I don't owe you anything...move."

"Shyeah, you do. Cough it up wuss."

"Look, why must we go through this every week..."

"Because your a stupid worthless little goth freak with the money I need to get X."

"Oh. Typical. How about no?"

"You better hand over my dang money before-"

"Carl!" A voice from across the hall yelled. It was Tifa, the beautiful biology teacher.

"Yes Ma'm...?" Carl said groaning, setting Sora down from almost choking him."

Sora rubbed his neck softly, but made no expression of the pain that currently clouded his whole body. Getting beat up at school and pretty much anywhere else really took a toll on you.

"Principles office. Now."

Carl walked over, flipping the finger in Sora's direction and kicking him in the gut. Sora hit the lockers and bit back a whimper. He hated it when people hit him in a place that had already been hit and was still healing.

"Sora are you ok?" Tifa said running over to the short teenager and gently took his arm. Sora shrugged it away quickly, wanting the contact but afraid to accept it.

"I-I'm fine." He said, trying to move away from the worried teacher.

"No, you're not. You're hurt...let's go to the nurse."

"I said I was fine, leave me alone Tifa...please...I'll be okay." He whispered, scared sick to go the nurse. They'd find out. They'd find out about it all.

"O-Okay...just...come with me early to biology, I'll get some ice for your neck. I don't want you out here where you can get hurt."

Sora looked down at his hands. Painted black nails with a red star on each of them, fingers almost hidden by rings, and wrists covered by arm guards. She wouldn't be able to see past it.

"Okay..."

"Good, come inside. This is my fiancé, Cloud. He's just in here helping me check some papers. Cloud this is Sora."

"Hey Sora, how are you?" Cloud asked, smiling. He was a very handsome man, blond hair blue eyes and muscles. Tifa would be called lucky, yet again so would Cloud for having Tifa.

"M'fine..." Sora mumbled softly, looking down at his hands again. Tifa smiled softly, you can go sit down and do whatever you want, I'll be right back. Oh, by the way, its lunchtime, did you eat anything?" Tifa asked worridly.

"M'fine..." Sora mumbled again, though inside he was starving. He hadn't had any breakfast and he rarely ever ate lunch. It was too much of a hassle being in the cafeteria. He never got to finish anything he was eating because there was always a group of jocks waiting to beat him up.

"So Sora...are you a sophomore...junior...?" Cloud asked looking Sora over. The boy was decked in black. Black eyeliner and black glasses. Black baggy pants. Black skater boy shoes. Black short sleeve shirt with the words 'Bloody Heart' on it, worn above a black and crimson red stripped shirt that clung to his skin. And lastly a black beanie, that made his wild chocolate spikes pool around his shoulders. _"This kid needs help…"_

"...Sophomore..." Sora stated, pulling out a black sketchbook and a black mechanical pencil.

"Oh...ok, um...what do you like to do?"

"Nothing."

"Uh...do you like to draw?"

"What's it look like...?" Sora said looking up. The comment wasn't sarcastic, it was just a response.

"Yeah...um, you have any friends?"

"No."

"Why?"

"Look, could you back up off me...take a good look at me, it isn't that hard."

"Oh, sorry. Didn't mean to bother you..."

Sora didn't answer him but began sketching. He looked up at Cloud once in awhile to see if he was on track. Cloud smiled nervously when the boy looked up, and as he expected he didn't get smile in return.

"Hey Sora, sorry I took so long, I got caught talking to the principle. Here you go."

"Thanks Tifa..."

"Your welcome." Tifa said smiling, then she sighed softly. "Class will be starting in a second, I'm sorry."

"...Why?"

"Why what?"

"...sorry."

"Hehe, I don't know...I just say it, it's a habit." She lied.

Sora nodded just as the bell rang. He sighed softly, putting away his sketchbook and closing his eyes. He didn't want to see the stares of the students coming in. He didn't want to see the point, laugh, and talk about him. He wouldn't see it. But he'd always hear it.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sometimes I come to a mirror and just look at myself. Look at who I am. And just beg, for one instance, to be on the other side.  
I look at myself and wonder if there's more to me than just me. More to who I am. If someday, someone will want me. If someday, I'll want someone. I don't like to think about these things, they make me scared. Someday, when I'm older, or dead, I'll pick up from where I was tragically dropped off. Hopefully. For now I see nothing ahead of me. I don't wish for tomorrow, and I don't wish for yesterday. I'm here. In the now. And that's where I'll always be. Holding on, not looking down, and not looking up.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Please Review!!!


	7. Teenage Temptations, A living Hell

"Life is what you make it" Insperational they say. That saying is for the rich, the successful, and the downright proud. Life isn't what you make it. Life is what fate makes it. Life is what god makes it. Life is what the spirits make it. Whatever you choose. But know this, life ins't what _you_ make it. You can better your life, if you have the resources, the time, the spirit, the will. And you can worsen your life by greed, foolishness, lies. But you can't make it what you want. Never. Life is something you get. Not everyone gets the chance, but for those who do, they get what was given. My life has always been that way. I was given a mom, given a dad, given a home. But like all gifts that are given, they eventually go away. And then your left with just you. Your life. And most times that life isn't what you want. "Life isn't fair" that saying is for the average, the damned, and the downright survivors of this forsaken world. Life isn't fair. Yeah, that's more like it.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Kairi, come downstairs please!"

Kairi groaned annoyedly wincing as her hair brushed the bruise on her face. Yeah, Namine knew where to hit where it hurt. She groaned again as her mom called her for the second time. She was probably going to ask her to babysit, _again_.

"Coming, Mom..." She drawled, geting up from her studies. She had been searching the net for mathmeticians she could write on. So far she had found none that seemed easy to write about. English was another subject Kairi did not excel at.

"Yeah Mom?"

"I need you to babysit Hannah and Harold for me. Me and your father are going out. Haley is staying with a neighbor." Kairi made a slight note to herself that her mom hadn't even noticed the bruise on her cheek. No, she only cared about her going out with Kairi's 'Dad'. They probably needed time to catch up on the dating they didn't do _before_ they got married. How pathetic.

"He's not my dad Mom..."

"Kairi...we've been through this before, he's your father now, please ease up on the 'dad' thing."

"Mom, I'm not calling that man my father."

"You know what, whatever. Watch the kids."

"Mom I have to study..."

"Do it later, watch the kids."

"Why can't Helen watch the kids? They're her siblings, not mine."

"Kairi, we are a family. They are your siblings and you're going to watch them. That's final."

"But Mom-"

"No buts about it."

Kairi glared at her mother and turned around and stomped back up the stairs angrily. Her mother didn't seem to care about her anymore. It was all about her 'dad' and her new 'siblings'. Kairi knew that her mother loved her new kids. Who wouldn't? They were all very cute. Helen was 16, a typical ditzy blond who could have as many boyfriends as she wanted. Not to mention she was down right snobbish. Hannah was a ten year old blond 'chick' who didn't listen to anybody and was eagerly following her older sister's footsteps. Joseph was a cute seven year old demon who also didn't listen to anybody. And lastly there was Haley, the baby, and the only one Kairi liked.

Kairi groaned inwardly at the prospect of watching the kids and sat back to her homework only to be inturrupted. A minute later the phone rang.

Kairi grabbed it to see if it was her aunt Aeris. She had been calling latley to check up on Kairi. Kairi loved her Aunt Aeris and especially loved talking on the phone with her. She was wrong. Looking at the Caller ID she gasped. "Wakayama Residence" It read.

"Ohmygosh, ohmygosh, ohmygosh!" Kairi yelled. She had to answer this. It probably concerned the essay. Inside though she was praying it was for another reason than school.

"H-hello...?" Kairi said, answering the phone.

A sweet, god like, handsome voice that could only be Riku answered, "Hey, is Kairi there...?"

"Uh...yeah, it's me." Kairi said grinning like a chesire cat while twisting the phone cord around her finger nervously.

"Hey Kairi, It's Riku."

"H-hi Riku..."

"Hey um, you know we have to do that paper right?"

"Yeah?"

"Well I was wondering if we could meet after school tomorrow to get started."

Kairi covered the the phone quickly and screamed loudly; a lovesick fan girl scream.

"U-um, sure, where'd you wanna meet?"

"Uh, is my house alright?"

Kairi covered the phone and screamed again. She most definitly had to call Selphie after this.

"Yeah, sure. Could you give me directions."

"Oh uh, sure. I live in Bastion Hills, do you know where that is?"

Kairi covered the phone once more and screamed for the third time. She was getting hoarse from all this excitment. Bastion Hills was a subdivision that the rich, and might I say, _only_ the rich lived in. Kairi had seen it once or twice when she and her mom went shopping over in the area. The homes were massive and they were each built on a hill. It was absolutly beatuiful and anyone who lived in Bastion Hills was considered remarkable.

"Y-yeah, I do...could you give me the address?"

"Sure, 1313 Lovely Street."

Kairi sighed. Lovely Street. How lovely.

"Hello?"

"Oh, sorry Riku. I got it. I'll see you tomorrow at four?"

"Yeah, that's good. See ya, Kai."

"Bye."

Kairi hung up the phone and sighed. Wait a second. Did he just call her 'Kai'? Kairi screamed again and picked up the phone to call Selphie. Ditch the babysitting. It was time for some major girl chat.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Look Sora, there's no way for me to get through to you if you never open up..."

"I dont' have anything to open up about..."

"Psh, everyone does..."

"Well I'm not everyone am I?"

"Look kid, what is your problem."

"Everything." Sora answered with a smirk. Why the heck was he here? Why the heck did the school officials make him go here? Why the heck couldn't they just leave him alone. That was his problem. All he wanted was to be left alone.

"Look, I'm your physciatrist Sora, I'm not your family, your parents, friends...anybody else. You can open up."

"...and why should I open up to someone I don't even know...?"

"Because...because I...oh good lord, just leave!"

"Thank you very much." Sora said getting what he wanted. It always happened this way. The woman would try, he wouldn't give her any answers or any attention, and then well...she got mad and he got his way.

"And don't you dare skip tomorrow, Sora, you've skipped ten times this month and I won't have it again!"

"Yeah whatever..."

"You better Mr."

"What am I three? I heard you, hag." Sora said loudly walking out and slamming the door, catching the attention of the other physciatrists. He smirked slightly when he heard the woman yelling at him to come back and apologize. Like hell would he ever do that.

Walking out into the chilly cold weather, Sora looked around quietly making sure no one was watching him. He then quickly made his way to a dark alley. Taking out his sharp pocket knife he quickly and easily, drew a red line on his arm. It hurt. Like hell. But it made him feel better. It always did.

"Hey kid...you want somethin...?" A voice from the back of the alley said quietly.

"I don't do drugs..." He answered quietly, quickly hiding the knife in his pocket, and looking out at the setting sun.

"You look like you need a hit..."

"I said I don't do drugs..." Sora mumbled. He always wondered why he didn't try it. He was offered it. Numerous times. But he never took it. He'd learned that drugs made you crazy, he knew people it ruined. He knew what people who did drugs did to people who didn't. He had a long deap scar on his arm as reference to that. He also knew what drugs did to him. They made him crazy with want. Lust for what he didn't have... Besides. His knife was his drug.

"Suit yourself."

"Yeah..." Sora mumbled. He grabbed his bag and made his way out of the alley silently. He didn't want to leave the darkness, he didn't want to go that house. His 'home'. That house was a house. It wasn't a home.

"Hey kid...wait a second..."

"I said I don't do drugs...quit asking."

"Nah, take it anyway...you'll use it, I know."

"No I won't, I'm not like that..."

"Really? Heh, it's better than the knife."

Sora gulped quickly. How the hell?

"Just take it. Trust me. Think of it as a gift." The voice said as a little packet wrapped in a black cloth landed by Sora's feet. Sora could hear the man shuffling away out of the other alley entrance. He was gone.

_"Really? Heh, maybe it is better than the knife..."_ Sora thought to himself as he pocketed the little packet. Maybe he'd need it later. Who knows. As far as he knew, didn't he have the right to be happy once in his life?

Sora made his way out of the alley once more and started walking. Not looking up or down. Just being there, like he always was.

After awhile he stopped walking slowly and looked at the setting sun. He felt a drop of rain, then more. The sun was suddenly hidden by clouds. He felt at peace.

It felt like it was only him right now. Him and his mind. It was quiet, except for the rustling of the few leaves left on the almost bare trees and the rain drops on the ground. It was November 12th. Two days until he turned 16. Tomorrow would be hard. Very. He sighed softly. Maybe he would need that packet sooner than later.

It had been 10 years. Yet it felt like just yesterday. It always did. It was a cursed life he was living. It wasn't fair. Life wasn't fair.

But then, when was it ever?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I remember the sunshine. It was special. Precious. The sun used to shine for me. Just for me. But what happens when your blinded by the light. What was once your joy has turned into your greatest enemy. I used to want it. So bad. Rainy days where hated and the sun was embraced. I enjoy the rain now. I embrace the tears. The rain is like the words I cannot say. Like my tears are words my shattered heart can't say. I cannot cry anymore. So the sky cries for me. The sun turned it's back on me. Ruined me. Like them. But I'll always have the rain. My words. My tears. The pieces of my heart.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review Responses!

**Malcolm Yuy- **I Know Riku's a big jerk (cries) It's pretty tough making your fav' character the bad guy. You've got a good idea on what's gonna happen though :D Thanks for reviewing, and review again!

**HyperShadowGirl11228- **Thanks for liking my story:D I know, I wanted to switch Namine and Kairi's personality to be different. (Kind of OOC) Namine will have more character depth though in the future...maybe some changes to her personality. Oh yeah...hugglez Sora Me feels sorry for Sora too. :( Thanks for Reviewing and please review again!

**Evil Genius Of The COCA- **Whoa, if there isn't anything I love more than a long review! You rock. :D Lol, you've got a good idea on what might happen, a good idea indeed. To be honest with ya, I'd probably fawn over Riku too (Fav' character and all) But not get crazy and all. Just admiring from the distance...:D I loved writing the part with Cloud. Me no likes him as tough guy all the time. Anyways, Thank you so much for reviewing! And please do review again.

**ffkingdom- **Thanks for the review! I'm glad you love it, makes me feel happy. :) :) Hoped you enjoyed this chapter. Review again!

**Black-Dax- **Lolz, he's gothic not Emo. But ya know...he does have an emo side to him as you've noticed after this chapter. But don't think that's the only thing up with his arms. Thanks for reviewing! And PLEASE Review again!

**KHGirl23- **Thanks for liking it! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, review again and you'll get a cookie.

**angelofsweetness- **OMG! I know! cries I hate making Riku bad...cries again Lolz, I love writing stories like this...hopeless romantic I am...Oh and hell yeah, Namine's a bit _too_ agressive. Jeez. And like you said, I believe Sora would be hot in b lack drools Thanks for the tips on the spelling, my bad (I hate doing spellchecks, they take too much time.) Thanks for reviewing, and please do review again! I love em'. :D

Anyways, Cookies for all who will review the next chapter. They're chocolate chip too. :D (And trust me, next chapter will not be so long away, I've already written it. :D)

Seeya later.


	8. It's hard to be cool when you're red hot

As memories flow back to you in the form of Deja Vu you're forced to deal with the onslaught of emotions that come with it. They can ruin a mood, ruin success, and ruin everything you had been building up. I was building up a wall. A wall around the emotion called Sadness, or grief, or depression. I was doing well, or so I thought. But it came back. All of it. Memories can never be forgotten. You can only hide them for so long. And when they find a way out, you're heartbroken. I thought of them today. I thought of my life, my love for them. It came to mind, not as Deja Vu but in the form of a living being. I nearly lost it. I nearly lost it all. Just like I did ten years ago. Happy early birthday me. Happy Hellday.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Can you believe it Selph? I'm going to his house, in Bastion Hills!" Kairi said squealing.

"You are SO lucky!" Selphie squealed. "What are you going to wear?"

"U-um, I don't know...this?"

"Heck no! Stop by my place, I'll fix you up with something."

"Thanks Selph." Kairi said smiling at her friend.

"No problem." Selphie said smacking loudly. They were headed to the cafeteria for lunch, Kairi was off the wall with jitters and Selphie was mad with jealousy. In the good way, of course.

Kairi was all smiles. She was so excited. She knew this was only a meeting about school, but like all lovesick girls, she couldn't help but overdue it.

"What should I say Selph, you know...to Keep conversation?"

"You say what you always say on dates."

"Yeah...thing is...I've never been on a date before...nor have I really ever talked to a guy alone before."

"Oh. My. Gosh. You're kidding me right?"

"I...um...no."

"Good lord. You're coming with me after school. We get out at 2:30, meet me at my house at 3 so we can pick an outfit, talk, and save this little situation we have on our hands. Got it?"

"Got it."

"Good."

"Yes...so um...yeah."

"Stop mumbling and hand over some gum, I'm starving."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Wow, another new student already huh?" Tifa said looking at the principle and then at the teenaged boy sitting, smiling.

"Yes, his name is Roxas Donovan. He just moved here from Serenity, you know, the big island. Roxas this is Tifa, she'll be your biology teacher."

"Hello." Roxas said given the woman a preppy smile. She was cute.

Tifa's smile faded a little when she saw Roxas's face. He looked so familiar...but she couldn't quite place him. Recovering her smile, she picked up her papers she had come to copy.

"I guess I'll see you in class in few minutes, huh?"

"I guess so." Roxas said smiling again. Nah, she was hot.

"So Roxas," The principle started, "You're a Junior, hmm, ahead of yourself I see."

"If you say so." Roxas said grinning. He loved being ahead. It just made him look all the more better which he clearly needed. Roxas wouldn't, no, couldn't be an extreme loser again.

"You're enrolled in six classes here...biology, calculus, physics, chemistry, English and...art?"

Roxas blushed softly, "Um...yeah, my mom wanted me to take that..." He lied. Roxas had always had a small liking for art. Ok, maybe a big liking. He was most definitely not good at art, but he loved creating it anyway.

"Ah...I see. Your big on the sciences?"

"Yes, I plan to go into the science field at Carpton's College when I'm done here."

"Carpton? Big school. Hard to get into. But seeing as you have a 4.0, I don't think there will be problem. You are already one of the brightest students at this school."

"Oh? Really?" Roxas said, acting as if he were surprised. He had always been better than most. He was used to it.

"Really. Too bad we had to set you back a year with the biology. We needed to see where you were at since you haven't taken a biology course in two years."

"Eh, it's no problem."_ "Just another class to ace."_

"That's good. Well I won't keep you, your class will be starting in a few minutes. Do you need help finding the room?"

"Nope. I'm good."

"Good, oh and Roxas, remember you, your mom and dad have a meeting tomorrow at six."

"I know, thanks."

"No problem."

Roxas grabbed his bag and walked out. Another school. It got tiring after awhile. Just when you make friends, you have to leave them. Hopefully he'd be able to keep his friends this time, either by staying here, or not messing up.

"Room 607...here we are." He said out loud. It was habit that he really needed to quit.

He was the first student in the room. Tifa was there and so was a blond haired man.

"Hey Roxas, have a seat anywhere you want. Is it alright if I introduce you to the class?"

"Sure." Roxas said smiling at the hot woman. _"If only she were a teen..."_

"Oh, and Roxas this is my fiance Cloud."

"...Hello." Roxas said frowning. _"Wouldn't you know she was taken..."_

"Hello Roxas. How are you?" Cloud asked giving him a smile. What was it with all these emotional kids that Tifa brought in early? They made him nervous. Besides that, why did this one look so familiar?

"I'm good. You?"

"Fine."

"Awesome."

"Uh...sure."

Roxas rolled his eyes and smiled at the man. Meh, he was so naive.

"So...how old are you?"

"15...I'll be 16 very soon. Like really soon. Like sooner than you know." Roxas said smirking. Yeah, he wanted to get on the guy's nerves.

"Um...alright."

"How old are you?"

Cloud coughed slightly and looked over at Tifa who was giggling while checking a paper.

"...26."

"That would make Tifa 24 then, huh?" Roxas said, trying to get more information.

This time Tifa coughed softly. Cloud grinned evilly.

"She's my age."

"Thought so." Roxas smirked. He then set about to pull out his books as the bell rang. _"Time to meet the class..."_ Roxas gulped quietly. He wouldn't ruin it this time. He wouldn't let his rabid emotions ruin his life here. It was a new place, new people. A chance to start over.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sora quietly made his way into the biology room. He had just been pummeled by a bunch of jocks and seriously didn't want to bring attention to himself.

It was horrible. This day. Guilt and grief hung over him like a cloud. He wanted to cry so badly but knew he couldn't. Not here. Not where they could see him. Not where he could find out. It wasn't going well. He was breaking down inside and he could barely hide it. Today the taunting the bulling, the pointing, the laughing, even though he endured it every day, it still felt so harsh. It hurt worse than his body which burned at even the slightest touch.

"Hey Sora." Tifa said smiling, touching the boys shoulder. Sora flinched in pain and shrugged her away.

"...hello..."

"Are you okay...you look bad." Tifa said looking at Sora's face. He'd taken it hard there.

"M'fine..." Sora turned away from Tifa and went to walk to his seat only to stop suddenly. That boy. Who was he? What was his name? Why did he look so familiar? Sora gulped softly and turned his eyes down, embarrassed at staring at the boy for so long.

The boy, Roxas was shocked. _"What the heck was that..."_ Who was that boy? And why the heck was he dressed so weird? Halloween long over. And why in the world did he have bruises on his face? Was he in a fight or something? Talk about a first impression.

Sora looked at the boy once sitting down. He was so familiar. It was as if he knew the boy, personally. His blond hair, his blue eyes. Sora looked down at his hands quickly. No. It couldn't be. It couldn't be him.

The class slowly filled in. A bouncing Kairi arrived last looking as if she were going to faint from all the excitement in her life.

"Class, we have a new student here with us."

Kairi looked up from her desk and scanned the room for anyone who appeared to be new, even though she had only been here two and half weeks.

"His name is Roxas Donavan."

Sora snapped his head up in shock. It...it couldn't be. No. That wasn't him. It just couldn't be him. Sora stood up quickly and brushed by Tifa, exiting the room. He ignored her calls. The classes chatter about him. He ignored it all. He needed air. He needed it now. He felt as if he were dying. And as if his whole world wasn't shaken enough.

Running outside he made his way to the back of the school. He grabbed quickly, looked around, and drew four deep lines on his arm. It hurt like hell, and for a moment, distracted him from his horrid emotional feelings.

Sora couldn't take it anymore, he leaned down and sat on the ground, back against the wall. He held his bleeding arm and pulled his legs up to him. And then he cried. Dozen's and dozen's of tears. Because the sun was shining. The rain wouldn't do it for him today, and nobody else cared to notice.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Selphie, guess what?" Kairi said through Selphie's bathroom door. She was trying on on of Selphie's numerous shirts.

"Hmm?" Selphie said looking in her jewelry box for something suitable for Kairi.

"There's a new kid, his name is Roxas?"

"Really?!"

"Um yeah, why the excitement?"

"I don't know, I just get excited when people come to our school. New chance to make friends and all."

"Like me?"

"Shyeah. So what's he like? Is he cute?"

"He's hot."

"Really?! Omygosh...another hot guy."

"He's got blonde hair and blue eyes...isn't that adorable?"

"Oh yeah."

"He's almost as cute as Riku. Almost."

Selphie sighed. "No one could be as cute as Riku..."

"You got that right." Said Kairi coming out of the bathroom. "Does this work?"

"Nah, try this one."

"Okay." Kairi sighed.

"So...what does he do?"

"What does who do?"

"Roxas you idiot."

"Oh. He's into the sciences. He's really smart."

"That's so cute."

"I know."

"What else besides school?"

"Um, he said he skateboards and plays roller hockey."

"Cool, I'm gonna check him out tomorrow."

"Haha, I know you will."

"But you won't, you have Riku now."

"Selphie! I do not have Riku...I wish to have Riku, but I don't have him..."

"Not yet..."

"Selphie. Stop."

"Okay Okay. Don't be a ditz."

"Pft, like ever. Hey Selph...you know Sora?"

"Yeah, what about him?"

"He ran out of the room when Ms. Tifa introduced Roxas."

"He's weird Kairi. Ignore it."

"I wonder what's wrong with him. He's so distant, he never talks..." Kairi gulped. Well yeah, he did talk...when he gave her that lesson. Oh if only she knew it was him. So far they hadn't had another 'emotion' assignment and she was highly grateful.

"Who cares. He's a freak."

"Maybe...but he's a person."

"I know that Kai."

"But everyone treats him like he's not..."

"Like you?"

"..." Kairi opened the door slowly. "...I'm gonna go. I can wear my stuff."

"...Kai...don't be mad at me. I'm sorry...It's just I...you keep acting like we're being rude...I don't see you talking to him so you're doing the same thing."

"...I just...I know. I'm sorry. I just feel bad everytime I see him. He doesn't have any friends and I...I know what it feels like to be without friends."

"He doesn't want any friends Kai."

"He may not want friends, but he needs them."

"Why don't you be his friend then...?"

"I...I need to go. I'll be late. I'll see you tomorrow Selphie."

"Kai wait...please don't be mad."

"I'm not...I just need to go. See you later."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"1313...here we are." Kairi looked up and gasped. The house was the biggest one in the neighborhood. It was massive. Kairi stood there gawking for a good five minutes before she noticed the stares and snickers of the neighbors. They were all thinking that she didn't belong here.

Kairi walked slowly up to the door and rang the bell. She nervously wringed her hands and looked at her feet. She was so nervous!

"Hey Kairi." Riku said opening the door, putting on a fake smile.

"H-hey." Kairi stuttered, getting lost in Riku's aqua orbs.This guy was so spankin' hot it wasn't even funny.

"Uh, come in..." Riku said smiling evilly as he turned his back on her. Oh this bet was going to be easily won.

Kairi followed Riku into the mansion and gasped. It was so beautiful. So expensive. So dang rich. Man she needed to get a good job when she moved out so she could get a place like this.

"Are you hungry? Thirsty?" Riku asked leading Kairi into a kitchen the size of the first floor of her house.

"Um, no I'm fine." Kairi said, running her hand along the granite countertop. "You're house is beautiful."

"Heh, thanks. You should see our summer house, it's much better than this old place."

Kairi gulped and smiled, slightly embarrassed. "Oh well, aren't all summer houses?"

"Do you have one?"

"Uh...um, no. Of course not."

"Then how would you know?"

Kairi turned beet red and looked at the floor. How could she be so stupid?!

"I...I don't, I'm sorry. I just guessed is all."

"Oh." Riku said, kicking himself inwardly. He had to win this bet. "So, let's get started? We can work in the dinning room, or the living room, then den..family room...library."

"Oh..um, anywhere you want to work."

"Okay, the den it is." Riku said walking out of the kitchen. Kairi followed him as he led her back towards the entrance of the house and off to the of the front door.

"So Kairi...what do you like to do...?"

"Do?...um, I like to study..." Kairi nearly killed herself for saying such a thing. It was so pathetic and she believed she had lost any chance of ever being even a friend of Riku's.

"Study? Oh...that's...cool."

"Uh..yeah...only when I'm bored though..."

"Right...do you play any sports."

"Um, no...no I don't."

"Aw that's too bad. I'm the captain of the football team."

"I know." Kairi said smiling. "How could I not know?"

Riku was about to say something smart about that when he heard a door creak open. He snapped his head up. _"Oh. God. No."_

Riku looked around nervously and nearly screamed like a girl when he saw that Kairi was looking in the direction of the door.

"Is someone here?" She asked quietly.

"Um...hey, what's your favorite band?" He asked quickly, trying to distract her.

"Oh...uh, I like all kinds. Preferably soft rock. I don't really have a favorite."

"Cool, I love hard rock. Always have always will...hehe...hehe." Riku said looking over his shoulder at the door.

"Riku, is someone here...?"

"No! Um...no...its my dog, look why don't we get started."

"Um ok." Kairi said, pretending like she wasn't paying attention to the door, or the figure who she knew Riku knew was there. She chattered aimlessly about the mathematician she had picked, Riku nodding eagerly trying to get her attention off the door or the person who had stepped out, but was hidden by the shadows. She pretended she didn't know or didn't see the eyes that locked with her's for the quickest moment and then were gone.

Troubled deep blue eyes. She'd know them anywhere. But why...why were they here?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

They were smiling dead. Smiles full of pain and sorrow. Three in a row lying in bliss. So that was what I believed. Now my world is shattered by the impossible. His eyes haunt me. Remind me. I wish I could believe they were real. But they can't be. They can't. I won't believe it. Denial. My long lost friend that I have brought back from the dead. I need you denial. I need you to chase away reality for me. Chase away the real, and replace it with imaginary truths. I need you denial. Make it go away. Please make it go away.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review Responses!

**Malcolm Yuy-** Lol..yeah I wanted to make him sort of nice...sort of. Ah yes, the drugs. Had to put that part in. Nice touch to the story I think. Thanks for the tip again (I try my best with the spelling and stuff...try not to remind me of it too often though VV) Thanks for reviewing! hands cookie

**shadowtailmon-** Thanks for reviewing! Lolz, the knife or the drugs...we'll see soon. hands cookie

**HyperShadowGirl11228-** Lolz, hehe, the drugs and the knife. Can't really decide which one I like better. XD Thanks for reviewing again hands cookie :)

**WellThat'sUnexpected-** Thank you! I'm glad you like it. I love Sora gothic $HAWT$ Thanks for reviewing! hands cookie

**Black-Dax-** Lolz, you'll find out soon enough. :) Sorry 'bout that! hands two cookies That should help. :) Hehe, I like both the knife and the drugs. Hard time decided you know. Anyways, thanks for reviewing, review again!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Alright, hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I told you it would be soon. :D

Anyone who reads the story, PLEASE review it, flame me if you want, I don't care. The more reviews the better (Make's me want to write more chapters ) Again, please review!

Peace


	9. I'm Kairi, I'm Sora

A/N: I was too excited...and bored...so I had to post another chapter the next day. :D Hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer- I do not own the song "Thoughless" By Korn, "Here Comes the Sun" By the beatles...and sadly Kingdom Hearts also.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sometimes you just have nothing to say. When your world shakes too much you learn to abide with it. It's about time I shut these words up. It'll be a branded prayer tonight so get drunk and forget your troubles. I prefer to take a moment in silence for the damned.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Selphie, I'm telling you the truth!"

"No. You. Aren't."

"He was there Selphie, he was, I saw him!"

"Look, why are you even talking to me?"

"Because you're my friend…"

"Yeah well what was that all about yesterday, huh? Friends…?"

"Selphie…I was just upset…I'm sorry."

"Whatever, I have to get to class…"

"Selphie, wait!"

"What?"

"I'm sorry, I really am. I'm just like you all, I'm not different and I'm not better when it comes to talking to Sora. I'm sorry I've been acting like it's your entire fault."

"….thanks."

"Huh…?"

"Thanks for apologizing."

"U-um…you're welcome."

"So…?"

"So what…?"

"What happened?"

"…I saw him. I saw Sora. He was at Riku's house."

"Why would he be at Riku's house…Riku hates him."

"Well I don't know…it was just weird. Like…I dunno."

"So…maybe he was dropping something off…"

"Like what?"

"I dunno….gum?"

"…."

"…."

"Let's get to class…you're losing it."

"'K yeah….I think I am. Speaking of gum, d'yah have any?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"What the hell were you thinking?!"

"I was thinking I didn't know you had a friend over…"

"Didn't you hear the door?!"

"No."

"Yeah you did. I know you did. Admit it now."

"I…didn't….get your hands off me."

"Since when do you make orders?"

"…"

"Yeah that's right, shut the heck up."

"I will. But she won't."

"What…?"

"That girl…Kairi…she talks too much."

"As far as I know Kairi is a shy fangirlish nerd who never talks to anybody. Oh yeah, and she didn't see you."

"Heh…you don't know Kairi. And yeah, she did."

"She what?!"

"She saw me, we locked eyes."

"Holy...wait, you know Kairi...yeah right."

"Yeah huh."

"Hehe, oh really….hmm, what's her most prized possession?"

"She has a star shaped lucky charm…she carries it around everywhere."

"Haha. You really think I believe that?"

"Ask her."

"Oh I will, and if any of this ever gets out, you're dead you little-."

"It's already out Riku…like I said, Kairi talks too much."

"No. She. Doesn't."

"Yes she does. To that brunette…Selphie. She talks to her."

"…"

"Now look whose silent…"

"…Look you little piece of crap, you're going to fix this. I don't care how you do it, but your going to fix it. You hear me?"

"I'm not fixing anything."

"You want people to know about your past huh…?"

"…"

"Yeah that's right, look who's silent now. You're going to fix this, make it so that none of this gets out to anybody. You're going to get friendly with this girl, make up a lie or something about why you were there, got it?"

"…fine."

"That's a good boy. Oh and don't mess up my bet while doing it…I still need that laugh."

"Oh and one more thing…you mess this up and there will be hell to pay."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Class, today is our next Emotion Lesson, Isn't that exciting?!" The substitute teacher yelled in excitement jumping around like a little child.

"Aww…crap." Selphie muttered looking at her arms. "Hey Kai, you think that voice is going to help you out again….?"

"Huh…uh…no. I hope…not."

"But guess what class! We're having partners! And the partner you get today is the partner you will have for the next three weeks!"

The class groaned in annoyance. What was with these teachers and partners?

"Oh great…" Selphie smacked. She looked over at Kairi who looked as if she were drowning in misery.

"Selphie you're with the new kid…"

"Yes!" Selphie yelled believing it was Kairi.

"Roxas."

"WOOT!" Selphie yelled again. The class eyed her warily and Roxas timidly shrunk in his seat.

Kairi grew nervous quickly after that. She was going to be paired with someone she didn't know. The names kept coming off the list and when it finally came to the last pair Kairi felt as she were on a plane that had just crashed and burned.

"Kairi and um….Sora." The teacher said, confused that Sora's name had been crossed out from being paired with another student and instead scratched in at the bottom next to Kairi's name taking the place of another student. The principle made the pairings, so who cared? He was a sub.

The class was silent. Kairi turned slowly to look at the back of the room only to be met with a confusing glare.

"All right, pair up! Today's assignment is different though. You are to draw your partner's personality! Separate pictures please. Talking must be involved or else you won't know how to draw your picture! Get started."

Kairi sat still. Sora sat still. Who was going to make the first move?

"_Yeah that's right, fix it or I'm going to bust your little secret…" _Yeah, better get moving.

"…Kairi…right?"

"Um…yeah."

"…Nice…to meet…you. I'm Sora…"

"I-I know…"

"Yeah um…"

"We're…supposed to get to know each other…right?"

"There's not much to know about me. I'm just Sora…your everyday goth kid."

"And I'm just Kairi…your everyday nerd."

"There's more to you than that…"

"Same for you…"

"…"

"…What's your favorite color?"

Sora looked down at himself. Wasn't it obvious? Then again, it wasn't.

"…black…"

"…and?"

"And what…?"

"Everybody...has two favorite colors…"

"What are yours?"

"Pink, that's the obvious one." Kairi said looking down at her clothes. Yep she was as decked in pink as Sora was in black.

"…and the other?"

"…black…"

"…that's odd."

"There's more to me that meets the eye…you never told me your other one."

"…white…"

"…that's odd."

"Heh…there's more to me that meets the eye."

Kairi blushed and smiled looking down at her hands. "What's your favorite song…?"

Sora snickered lightly and glanced over at Selphie and Roxas. The boy was making him extremely uneasy right now, and it didn't help that Kairi wasn't the easiest to talk to. Then again he could say the same for himself.

"…Do you want the truth or the fake?" Sora said before he could stop himself. Why the hell would he ever tell her his favorite song? It would ruin his reputation, or what was left of it that is.

"Both."

_Crap._

"Um…well my fake favorite is 'Thoughtless' by Korn."

"Hehe…I've heard that song. It's disturbing."

"So am I."

"…what your real favorite…"

"Nothing…"

"Come on, tell me. I won't laugh."

"Why should I trust you...?"

"Cause...cause you should."

"...Really...?"

"Well uh...no...there's no reason for you to trust someone you've never talked to before but...Please!"

"No."

"Pretty please?"

"No."

"Aww, come on...in couldn't be that bad..."

"..."

"If I tell anyone you have the right to to tell them-"

"'Here comes the Sun'…by the Beatles." Sora interrupted getting annoyed with the girl.

"…"

"I knew you'd think it's weird…"

"No!…Um, that's my favorite song too."

"You're not lying to make me feel better are you…?"

"No…really. I have a couple of lines from the song written on the back of my lucky charm." Kairi said bringing her charm out and smiling. "My dad used to sing the song to me…I liked it so much…he gave me this charm before he died…he had the lyrics "And I say, it's alright" engraved on the back. It's my most precious possession."

"Oh...I'm um...sorry...about your dad." Sora said, trying to be caring; an emotion he was most definitly not used to expressing.

"No...don't worry about it. It's all in the past." Kairi whispered smiling. Her smile grew wider as she noticed the barely visible but definite trace of a smile on Sora's lips.

"So...um..." Sora mumbled, feeling a bit faint as Selphie started walking towards them, Roxas in tow.

"Hey!" Selphie yelled plopping herself down in an empty seat near Kairi.

"Hey." Kairi replied, a little upset that Selphie had interrupted her oddly comfortable conversation. Why she felt comfortable telling the freaky stranger about her Dad, she didn't know. Yet, it felt right.

"Watcha doin?"

"Um, getting to know each other...I guess..." Kairi said, eyeing the blond haired boy who was eyeing Sora who was looking about ready to puke. "And you're Roxas...?"

"Oh...yeah, Roxas Donaven, you?" The blonde asked, looking at Kairi curiously.

"Kairi, Kairi Henry. Nice to meet you."

"Isn't he perfect Kairi!" Selphie yelled, hugging Roxas's arm. Roxas's blushed red, and tried to push Selphie off but to no avail.

"Um...I guess...hey, what are you guys doing over here?" Kairi asked, looking over at Sora who was furiously drawing in his sketchbook, he seemed to be a bit calmer but was still extremely tense.

"Uh...just wanted to say hi!" Selphie yelled standing up, and bringing Roxas up with her. "I'll talk to ya later Kai."

"Seeya..." Kairi mumbled. _Show off. _Kairi looked over at Sora. He was addding the last few touches to the drawing he had started only four minutes earlier. "What did you draw...?"

"...nothing..."

"Ok...just wondering...I wouldn't laugh..."

"...how am I supposed to believe you...?"

"...um, I'll tell you my deepest fear." _What the hell was she saying?!_

"...why would you do that?"

"I really don't know why..."

"Here. Save your secret." Sora said handing over his sketchbook. Kairi looked at it and gasped. It was her. It was her and Selphie talking a minute ago. The drawing loooked so real it almost looked like a photograph.

"Wow...you're amazing. How..how did you do this?"

"Talent...I guess..."

"You should showcase your work or something, this is so pretty." Kairi said smiling. Again she noticed the trace of a smile.

"It's not that great...average..."

"Why do you underestimate yourself? This is amazing."

"...I don't. I know my limits. It's not good enough."

"Whatever you say. Someday someone else will notice it, then you'll become famous." Kairi said matter-of-fact.

"Someday."

"Well today isn't that day most definitely." A voice said from behind them. Kairi looked up into the eyes of her teacher and grimaced. Sora mearly looked at his hands. "You two are the only ones who haven't painted anything. Class is over."

"Oh...I'm s-sorry." Kairi stammered, blushing. She was most definitely going to fail this class.

"Whatever. You two go on and get out of here." The teacher muttered drawing an F on both of their canvases.

"...Hey...um, sorry I talked so much." Kairi said grabbing her stuff.

"It's okay..."

"I'll...see you later...okay?"

"'K...bye." Sora said in a whisper before quietly walking out of the classroom.

Kairi was about to leave the room when she noticed that Sora had left his black sketchbook on easel table. Kairi grabbed it, not wanting anyone else to steal it. She'd return it to him. Somehow. Deep down she felt the sudden need to look in the sketchbook, she knew it was snooping, but she was so curious. She flipped open the sketchbook and on the first page was a picture. A picture of Sora and Riku. They were both young, about 6 and 7. They were standing in front of a building with whom Kairi presumed was Riku's parents by the color of their hair. On the wall of the building were the words "Lakeshire Foster Care Network." Kairi stared at the picture. She knew this was no imaginary scene. This was a picture from Sora's past. He was a foster kid, she guessed. That's why he was at Riku's house. Kairi frowned at this. Why the hell didn't Riku stand up for Sora? Why did he pretend he wasn't there? Why did he pretend like he didn't know him, or didn't protect him when the jocks got after him? Kairi didn't understand, it just didn't make sense.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Right now is about time for it. I took a bullet in the shape of a man. Lord knows I've messed up his plan. Sometimes when we get a bit of hope we get crazy, and make mistakes that'll ruin your life. I thought I taught myself that at age six. Looks like the human is always learning. Why's it always have to be the hard way though?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXx

Review responses!

**Evil Genius of the COCA-** Thanks for reviewing so soon! (You're fast!) Lolz, I think you're thinking of another story, nice idea though whoever thought of it. Yes, the foster brother subject finally comes to light :D Yay! And yay for you, Roxas is in the story! (Me is happy too) I wasn't going to add him but it just doesn't feel right without him in it. Review again!

**HyperShadowGirl11228-** Lol, it was. Nice idea about the story too :D And yes, as you've seen from this chapter Kairi has finally started talking to Sora. Yay. Review again please!

**Malcolm Yuy**- Thank you! I'm glad it was good. :) Something along those lines, yes...keep thinking in that direction. Review again please!

**Shadowtailmon-** Lol, Yay Roxas:) Review again!

**lokkish**-Thanks for reviewing:) I'm glad you love the story, take the time to review again please!

**Divinehearts-** Wow, I'm glad you liked it enough to read the whole thing:D Hehe, now you know what Kairi will do now. :) Review again!

**THE RAD DINOSAUR-** Thank you:D Me too, I wanted my story to be different, so I kindda switched personalities. Review again!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ok peoples, hope you enjoyed the chapter...next chapter is already written :D Yays. 10 reviews and I'll post it tomorrow!(Tha'ts for all of you people who have my story on their favorites list but won't review! and I hate bribing people but...I LOVE REVIEWS!) Anyways, just to let you know the next chapter is about Namine...and Roxas. Yup. It's about time. Laters.

Peace


	10. Gains And Losses

Sometimes who we are isn't who we want to be. I know that's for sure. I"d give anything to belong. Anything but my pride. That's the one thing I've held onto all these years, I"m not going to bow unless I have to. The can yell insults at me. Kick me, push me down. I'll receive it, because I have too, but I won't accept it. Never. I'll be the kid that's only there, the kid that's only wanted because of status. The kid that's their punching bag when their mad, their victim when they let loose. But I won't be their slave. I've still got my pride. And I'm not letting it go, I won't let it slip away.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Namine, get your lazy butt down here now!"

"I'm comin', Ma'!" Namine yelled, throwing back her covers and grabbing a hair tye to pull back her hair. "I'm comin', hold on one second."

"I said now!" The persistent woman yelled from the bottom of the stairs.

"I'm hurryin', really!" Namine yelled, throwing on some clothes, grabbing her cheerleading suite and her purse and running to the bathroom. She jammed her toothbrush that she had smothered in toothpast into her mouth and hurriedly got to putting on her make-up.

"If I have to call you one more time Namine, it won't be good for you!"

Namine spit out the past, turned off the water, and ran down the stairs right into her mom. Her mother shrieked and threw her off of her sending Namine crashing into the wall.

"What the hell do you think your doin'?"

"Comin' down them stairs Ma." Namine whispered, forgetting to hide her accent.

"And_ why _are you up so early?" Her mother asked, looking confused.

"Caus' you said so, Ma." Namine answered, holding her hand. It was probably fractured, again.

"It's Mother, Namine. Mother. Why you calling me Ma?" Her Mother asked quietly, almost kindly. She was always kinder as 'Mother'.

"'Caus'...that's what I've always called yah'?" Namine asked. _Oh great._

"Namine, get on to school..."

"But it's 5:30 Ma'."

"You call me Mother! I'm not called Ma'!" The woman yelled, tears starting to form on her face.

"It's 5:30...Mother."

"Namine...why are you calling me Mother?" The woman said looking at the tears and frowning. She then looked at Namine with a scowl on her face.

"..." Namine groaned softly and looked out the window. It was happening again.

"Answer me!"

"I don't know Ma'."

"Good riddance, what a god forsaken daughter I have...get to school. Now."

"But..."

"I said get!"

"Yes Ma..." Namine whispered, grabbing her bag and stuffing her uniform in it.

"Hold on..."

"Yes Ma."

"I'm about sick of all this cheerleading crap. You're done with it, turn in the uniform."

"But Ma! Please, I love being a cheerleader!" _No I don't, its just a protection..._

"Well I don't care, get rid of it. You'd have to anyway...we're movin' out."

"What?!"

"You heard me, we're movin'. Went gamblin' the other day...guess I gambled a bit too much. Harold is kickin' us out."

"But Ma...you two were s'posed to get married..."

"Well we aren't."

"You always ruin everything Ma' always...why can't you just stop! We're livin' in Bastion Hills for godsake! You didn't have to gamble, Harold gave us everythin' we wanted!"

"Look, we're leavin' tonight, I'm done with Harold."

"Where we gonna go then Ma...? Live on the streets again? Try to find Dad? Beg Grandma again...? What are we gonna do?"

"Shut the hell up with that sarcasm, Namine!" Namine's mother screamed, slapping Namine hard across the face.

"No, I'm not shuttin' up 'til you tell me where we gonna go!" Namine yelled, forgetting all about her harsh accent.

"I don't know...all I know is we're leaving. We're gonna sell all your clothes for money. You're gonna get a job. So am I."

"Ma...I have a reputation at school..."

"Who the hell cares about your reputation?!"

"I do!"

"Well I don't. I'm your mother and I make the rules."

"Ma...?"

"Mother Namine, It's mother."

"Ma, listen to me!"

"It's Mother! Don't you get it?!"

"Ma you need help, you need to see someone!"

"I'm not seeing anyone Namine. Don't call me Ma, again."

"...Mother...I'm gonna tell someone about you, you need help."

"Namine, It's Ma!"

"...Ma...?"

"Why are you calling me that?!"

"Nothin'...sorry, I'm gonna go now..."

"Not with those clothes on you aren't, change em' then you go." Namines mother said, looking at her nails.

"But Ma!"

"I said now you little turd!"

Namine said defeatedly and ran up to her room. Grabbing the wornest outfit she could find, she ran back downstairs ignoring her mother's calls and ran out the door.

She needed to be alone. Her world as she knew it for the past two years was coming to an end. Her mom had just lost another boyfriend. They were being kicked out of the home she thought was too good to be true. She wasn't a cheerleader. All of her new clothes her Mother was going to sell, and she had to get a job which would probably cause her to drop out of school. She had it nice for a little while, but she knew that her past would always come to haunt her. It always did.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Ya Man...?"

"What?"

"Check it."

"Holy crap..." Riku whistled looking towards the figure his best friend was pointing too.

"Richest girl in school havin' some financial issues, yah?"

Riku didn't answer him and squinted his eyes to make sure he was seeing right. Yep, it was Namine. Wearing normal clothes. No, not normal...worn clothes. She was walking towards the table she usually sat at with her cheerleading squad.

"Watcha thinks goin' on?" Wakka asked, looking over at his shocked friend.

"Dunno..." Riku answered watching the scene. Namine was handing over her cheerleading outfit and the girls at the table suddenly started smirking and whispering. Namine had her head bent in an emotion known as...shame?!

"...she's quittin' cheerleading, yah?"

"Stop stating the obvious, Wakka." Riku muttered. His chance with Namine just went down the drain. If she wasn't a cheerleader, he couldn't date her. His rep would be on the line. Plus it looked as if she were having financial issues, another aspect that would put his rep on the line. Nope, he was done with her.

"...dude, ya gonna risk it, eh?" Wakka asked, watching Namine approach their table.

"Heck no."

"Hey...um, Riku...can I talk to you for a second?" Namine asked shyly blushing in shame.

"Um..I think not."

"Please...it's important."

"Why are you being so...humble?" Riku prodded, smirking evilly.

"...Riku please not now...I...just hear me out."

"...Mmm, probably coming here to ask me for that money you lended me to fix the dent in my dad's car back, huh? Is it because you and your mom got kicked out huh?"

"Riku..that's not-"

"Oh I saw it all, your freaky bipolar mother got you two kicked out, huh? Now you're dirt poor."

"Riku...why are you being so mean to me...?"

"Look...if you thought we had something...you are dead wrong." Riku stated smirking. He was catching the attention of half of the cafeteria, and the snickers and smirks were growing. Oh he loved humiliating people.

"Ok...ok then...I'm gonna leave you 'lone."

"Awww, is the accent comin' back to ya?" Riku mocked, mimicking her accent. The cafeteria cackled loudly. All of Namine's friends turning against her.

"...I'm gonna see you later now...bye." Namine whispered, grabbing her bag and running to the exit of the cafeteria. Everyone inside the cafeteria, those who expressed it, and those who hid it, were secretly glad of Namine's humiliation. That is except one individual. One individual who had never experienced Namine's wrath. One individual who'd only seen her once since starting the school. Roxas frowned sadly while watching the pretty blond girl run out the room. All of his new made friends however laughed and joked about how awesome the previous events had been. Roxas however excused himself from the group and also exited the cafeteria. He knew how it felt. And he had always wanted someone to follow him, to make sure everything thing was ok, and to tell him it was alright to mess up and reap what you sowed. Yeah, he knew how it felt.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hey, wait up!"

Namine turned around and looked at the blond haired boy approaching her warily.

"Hey...what happened back there?" Roxas asked the pretty blond girl.

"You saw it, I got bashed...I don't blame em'"

"...Well I do, that was uncalled for."

"It was due."

"Why...?"

"Look, why are talkin' to me...and who are you...?"

"Oh uh...my names' Roxas, I'm new here."

"Hi...I'm Namine..."

"Nice to meet you."

"Um...yeah...I'll see ya' later..."

"Hey...are you ok?"

"...yes...no...actually, but that ain't your problem."

"I'm sorry...about them."

"Why?"

"I don't know...cause I guess I know how you feel..."

"No you don't...I was a bitch towards them...I deserve it."

"Well...at least you're trying to change."

"I guess...hey...what'd you say your name was again?"

"Roxas. Roxas Donaven."

"Roxas...It's...nice to meet you too." Namine said giving a small smile and turning away.

"Hey um...I'll see you around, ok?"

Namine turned nodded softly, and walked down the hall towards her next class. Why didn't he hate her? Want to mock her and laugh? She definitely deserved it. She had been so blind. He was weird that boy. A good kind of weird, she decided.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Ok listen up, remember you tried out for the cheerleading squad a couple of months ago, freshman."

"Yeah?"

"Well...since Namine's out, you're in."

"OHMYGOD!" Selphie screamed jumping up and hugging the cheerleading captain.

"Yeah yeah, get off me. Practice is at four everyday, be there or you're out."

"I will, I promise. You have my word. You're amazing you know that? You're awesome-"

"Heh...I know I am aren't I." The cheerleader said leading her squad away from the hyper brunette.

"Oh.My.God." Selphie gasped, falling into her seat.

"Congrats." Kairi said trying to be happy for her friend.

"Thanks Kai!...wait, this sucks..." Selphie said looking guilty.

"No, really Selphie. I have no skills in athletics, seriously. And you've been here longer than I have so it's only fair."

"Oh, ok then." Selphie said smiling. Kairi frowned. She was hoping she'd be a little more sympathetic.

"Yeah...so..." Kairi said trying to change the subject. Selphie however didn't get the hint.

"This is going to be amazing Kai! You know how many guys will ask me out?! I'm going to be popular! I'll get to sit with the cheerleaders and go to all of their events and everything and I'm going to make so many new friends and finally not be a dork and...gosh, it's going to be so awesome!"

"That's...great." Kairi whispered feeling hurt.

"I know it is, I'm going to be so amazing!"

"Yeah...well, don't forget me when you become so amazing."

"Oh I won't, I'll call you once in awhile." Selphie said, not realizing the effect of her words.

"K, so I'm gonna see you later, okay?"

"Yeah, bye." Selphie said not even looking at her, she was busy ogling the jocks at the other table. She was going to get to date one of them! Maybe even Riku!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"...Hey Riku...?"

"What Wakka?" Riku asked lazily, while absentmindedly drawing over his test paper. The teacher had left the room for one of his usual 30 minute breaks and the class was taking the time to either talk or cheat on the test.

"Guess who filled in Namine's spot, yah?"

"...Who?" Riku said looking up curiously.

"That Selphie girl, isn't that crazy, yah?"

"What is this world coming to..." Riku mumbled going back to his drawing.

"...Something good man."

"Whatdoya mean?"

"I mean ask her out, instead of Namine to that dance."

"What the hell are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking it would mess that little Kairi girl up...badly."

"Wait a second...you're right." Riku said smiling evily.

"You gotta be sneaky though...they talk to each other."

"Pft, me? Not sneaky? Yeah right." Riku mumbled, his brain running through ideas. This was perfect. Absolutely perfect. Hey, Wakka wasn't as dumb as he looked.

"So...watcha gonna do, yah?"

"You'll see my friend...I'm not about to explain it here. People could hear."

"Oh...yah."

"You have Selphie's number by any chance?"

"Yah, don't know why though..."

"Perfect, give it to me. I need it."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kairi tried not to cry. She really did; but she couldn't help it. She thought it was too good to be true, and it was. Maybe she was kidding. Maybe. Kairi prayed so. As she pulled out her notebook she noticed that she still had Sora's black sketchbook. She was instantly tempted once again to look under the cover of the book. _"He wouldn't know...I wouldn't say anything about." _She thought, sniffling back her tears. This was something to get her mind off of the sad predicament she was in. Kairi gave into her temptation and opened the book to a random page. What she saw startled her. It was a picture of a boy, a very familiar boy, he was obviously dead...blood pooling around him. Kairi thought hard about where she had seen this boy. Then it came to her in a rush. Roxas. Kairi noticed tear drops on the picture and she could barely make out a few words that were faded and were obviously erased. She made out the words 'You're' and 'Dead'. Kairi quickly closed the book and placed it back into her bag. She wasn't even going to think about that picture.

Before Kairi knew it the bell rang and school was over. She quickly grabbed her bag and made her way down the hallway, looking for Sora. It was easy enough to spot him as he was the only one wearing all black.

"Hey..." Kairi said approaching the boy.

"Hey..."

"I didn't get to talk to you in class because of the lecture...I just wanted to give you this, you left it yesterday."

Sora heart fell to his feet. Oh. God. No. He hadn't even checked to see if he had it with him. He had two sketchbooks and wrote in both of them equally. If Kairi had looked at the images, which he knew she did, she would figure out. She'd figure out about it all. "...thanks...I forgot about that..." He whispered, taking the book from the girl. Their hands touched for a second and Kairi blushed beet red. Sora only shrugged and grabbed his bag from his locker.

"You're welcome..." Kairi answered, as they began walking towards the school exit.

"So...what did you think of them?"

"Of what?" Kairi asked worridly.

"My drawings..." Sora answered quietly.

"Uh...I didn't...well..."

"It's ok if you looked at them...I should have been more careful."

"...I'm sorry...I only saw two."

"Which ones?" Sora asked pulling out the keys to his...or Riku's car.

"Well...the one with you...and Riku and his parents I guess."

"So you know..."

"I sort of guessed."

"Good. I need you to keep a secret for me." Sora said stopping and pulling her arm so they were behind a bush outside of school.

"...what secret?" Kairi asked, blushing again at the contact. Sora was surprisingly warm to the touch, not cold as she had imagined.

"Please don't tell anyone. Just please don't...not even Selphie...if you haven't already."

"Why...?" Kairi asked, glad she hadn't told Selphie about the sketchbook, yet again, Selphie wouldn't care anyway.

"Cause...It really wouldn't be good...just please don't." Sora said almost pleading.

"I won't. You have my word...and no, I haven't told Selphie." Kairi said smiling.

"Thanks...I...really appreciate it." Sora said quietly, again not used to saying thank you.

"No problem. Everyone has secrets that need to be kept."

"...good and bad..." Sora said barely above a whisper. Yet Kairi heard it.

"Hey um...can we get out from behind this bush." Kairi asked suddenly feeling awkward.

"Sure..."

"I'm sorry I looked...I really am."

"I said it's ok...really...just curious though, what other one did you see?"

"...The one with the new guy...Roxas..."

"..."

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have looked."

"...It's fine...just...just know that I have nothing against him, or anyone else...okay? I just have issues...and well...him being here is one of them."

"Okay...I understand." Kairi said, not pressing the issue. "Whoa, nice car..."

"Heh, It's not mine." Sora said as they approached a black shelby mustang. "It's Riku's...he got his license suspended...so I drive..."

"Sweet." Kairi said drooling at the pimped out wheels on the car. Sora chuckled lightly but immediately stopped when Kairi looked up surprised.

"You just laughed!" She exclaimed smiling.

"You looked like a demented car obsessed wanna be pimp...anyone would." Sora said opening the car and throwing his bag in.

"Hey, shut up!" Kairi yelled laughingly. She stopped when she caught the time on the giant clock on top of the school tower. "Oh my god I'm gonna miss the bus! Bye!" Kairi yelled taking off.

"...Bye..." Sora answered quietly, watching the peppy red-head run off. She really wasn't that bad. He hoped he could trust her. He prayed she would keep their promise. Words were one thing, actions were another. Yet deep down he had a feeling that she would keep it. A strong feeling. He suddenly felt guilty knowing about Riku's plan. It wasn't right, but he wasn't about to stop it. Not on his life. Never on his life.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sometimes we get that sudden urge telling us we can save the world. That we're heroes. That we can make a difference. I'm not ashamed to say I get that urge too. But I could never be a hero. Not after what I've done. I'd be something I wasn't, a hero. I've always wanted to do something more, be something more, have something more. But villains don't get second chances. Sinners don't get second chances. It wasn't my fault, they keep trying to tell me. But I know it was. I did it. I pulled the trigger of my life. And this is where I am because of it. Others say I planned it, I didn't. I know I didn't. They can laugh and call me the sick boy I am, but honey, murder isn't always a plan.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Whew! My hands are killing me! Typing that bad boy took forever. I'd like to thank all my reviewers for this chapter:

**Malcolm Yuy **

**THE RAD DINOSAUR **

**shadowtailmon **

**Divinehearts **

**angelofsweetness **

**Black-Dax **

**HyperShadowGirl11228 **

**Evil Genius of the COCA **

**Kupo3.0**

Sorry I can't give individual responses this time, I'm just tired out. (Feeling kinda sick...sucks...) Anyways, hope you enjoyed this chapter, and please review again!

Peace


	11. Sora's Life, from the bottom to the top

A/N: Ok, just to let you know this isn't really chapter. It's just an insight into Sora's life. A new chapter is coming soon, so stick with me!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

We were always together,

Fighting imaginary crimes,

It was forever,

_"Today we be pwolice mwen!" He declared. "We fights cwime together!" "I'll be the chief. You're the assistant cop." The other said. "Whys you gets to bwe the boss?" The former yelled pouting. "Cause I'm older than you and I'm taller." The second replied matter of factly. "Don't worry, one day you'll be the boss. Lets play now." The little one would never ask when, for right now they were both boys, none were now men. It didn't matter if he never was first, it was always much better than being the worst._

Six years went fast,

It couldn't last,

I'll end up there whenever,

_"Sweetie, someone wants to meet you." She said. He didn't answer. "They seem really nice, don't you want to meet them?" _

_He didn't answer. "Come on now, don't be shy." He didn't answer. She left the room. Then he cried. Then he prayed he would die. And believe me he tried. _

I didn't believe a word,

How could I?

I had pulled the trigger,

So shouldn't I die?

_"It wasn't your fault, it was his." She said. "You didn't do anything wrong." He didn't answer. He walked away. She was lying. They always lied. She was some sort of guide._

I love you they said,

I laughed in their face,

Who wants a freak son,

I'm too out of place,

"_You will be our son." They said. "This is our son, he will be your brother." They lied. They always lied. He wasn't their son. He was only an item. Only a reason. A charity case. A charity case that made them look good, and him look like sin. It was a race he could never win. _

The love that they showed,

In bruises and hate,

Reflected on me,

In suicide weight,

_"What the hell are you doing?!" They screamed. He laughed, the blood poured. It made a form on the floor. A broken crimson heart, with a line down the middle. They yelled and kicked, screamed and bit. He laughed till he cried. He wished he would die. But wishes never come true. He already knew._

You're lucky they say,

I cry in despair,

My innocence taken,

You tell me that's fair,

_"I'm sorry it happened." That's all they could say. He cried out in grief as they all walked away. Shame filled his insides he felt as if dead. He might as well be, why else should he live? _

They called me worthless,

An ugly old 'waif',

I may be unwanted,

But can't I feel safe?

_He walked through the door and was slammed to the wall. It wasn't his fault he couldn't answer the call. He slapped and he punched then threw him away, a life as a servant, no, more like a slave. He begged for forgiveness he'd make it all right. Sometimes in the morning it feels like the night_

One day I'll be gone,

Will someone miss me?

Will they realize what they did,

Will they finally see?

Will they see that I'm human,

Will they continue to break,

Can't they see that I'm broken?

That I too make mistakes?

_They can laugh and call me the sick boy I am, but honey murder isn't always a plan. _

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Thanks for reading (I know it was short) A new chapter should be up in few days, maybe even tomorrow. Thanks to all my reviewers on the last chapter! Love you guys! Please review again!


	12. Red M&M's

A/N: New chappy! I'm pretty proud of this one for some reason. I don't know why, I just like it. Read and review!

Disclaimer: I do not own the band Hoobastank or the Candy: M&M's, Starbursts, Gummy Bears, and Reeses.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

They frowned when they saw me. They whispered...muttered...groaned in disbelief. I wasn't the kid they wanted. I was status. I was there to be seen as an object of pity. I only made them look good, that's all they wanted. They didn't want me. Nobody wanted me. They were scared. They didn't want to look at me. Nobody comforted me when I saw shadows on the wall. Nobody told me it was ok when I heard gunshots in my ears. Nobody told me it was ok. So it wasn't ok. So I learned that what I am and what I did...it wasn't ok. It wasn't ok to pull the trigger. It wasn't ok to run upstairs and learn the truth about this damned world. It wasn't ok to scream and cry when I knew it was useless. It's not ok. I'm not ok. So yeah, I've learned my lesson.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Kairi! Wait up!" A voice yelled from behind, it was Selphie. Kairi sighed and slowed down but didn't stop walking. She was upset with her right now. No, more like angry.

"Kairi! What is your problem all of the sudden?" Selphie said falling in step with the red head. Waving at the cheerleaders as they passed by.

"Nothing Selphie."

"Yes there is, I know it!"

"And how, you've only known me for about a month."

"Jeez, what is your problem?" Selphie yelled angrily.

"You are! Now that you're a cheerleader you're acting like you're so much better than other people!"

"I am not!" Selphie shouted, stamping her foot in anger.

"Yes. You are."

"I. Am. Not."

"Oh shut up and get out of my way."

"Why don't you shut up and stop being so emotional!"

"I am not, you're being a bitch!"

"Well at least I'm not an emo bitch!"

"What the-" Kairi stopped angrily and stomped off into her art classroom. Ditch Selphie, she didn't need her.

Kairi stomped over to her seat and sat down angrily, grabbing her paints and pastels quickly while fuming.

"...Are you ok?" A voice asked. It was Sora who was calmly setting out his paints and pastels next to her. He eyed her curiously behind his glasses lenses. She was furious, he assessed.

"No, I'm pissed as hell so shut up!" Kairi snapped not looking at him.

Sora did just that and ignored her.

"Oh...crap, I'm sorry...how...how are you?" She asked looking at Sora. He was busy sketching something into one of his black notebooks.

"...Ok...you?" He asked, not looking up. Kairi was instantly curious as to what he was drawing.

"Pissed as hell." She replied in a huff tilting her head so as to see what he was drawing.

"You know...you could just ask to see it." Sora mumbled, again not looking up.

"Oh uh...sorry, didn't mean to intrude...seriously." Kairi said looking away.

"It's ok..." Sora stated placing the notebook in her lap. "It's just you." He said looking in his backpack for something.

Kairi looked at the picture. It was her alright. Sora had skillfully copied the emotions on her face just a few minutes ago. She was furious. And it sure did show. "Wow...I looked bad didn't I?"

"No...just upset."

"Yeah...just upset." Kairi mumbled tracing a line of her hair in the drawing.

"Why?"

"Why what?" Kairi asked looking up at the boy. He looked at her out of the corner of his eyes and Kairi suddenly took note of the beautiful blue color they were. Why hadn't she noticed them before? All she could see was the anger or hurt in his eyes, she'd never really taken note of the breathe taking color.

"Why are you so upset?" Sora asked, turning to look at her fully in the face. Kairi gulped. His eyes were really getting to her right now for some reason.

Kairi sighed as the events that took place a few minutes ago came to mind. "My friend Selphie and I had a little...argument..because she's popular I guess now and...I just...I don't know."

"She's the new cheerleader..."

"Yeah..."

"That's what happens to most of them...the ones who want so badly to fit in they leave all their friends behind..."

"...Has that happened to you?" Kairi asked, looking at the sad look on Sora's face that he quickly masked.

"...No, no...it hasn't."

"...oh." Kairi whispered looking at her hands. She had hoped he could relate.

Sora was about to say something when the eccentric teacher bounced into the room.

"There'll be no lecture today class, we'll all be going outside to paint a moment in scenery, the easels are already out there. Your drawings will be graded as one cohesive piece. That means both of your paintings will be graded as a piece for all of you dimwits. Pair up with your partner and follow me!" The teacher yelled excitedly.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"...I hate this class..." Kairi muttered staring at her blank canvas.

"Why are you in it in the first place...?" Sora asked, already painting the outline of a red maple tree.

"My 'Dad'...he wants an artist in the family and since he can't make any of his kids take an art class, he asked Mom to make me."

"Oh...sorry about that." Sora stated studying his artwork.

"Meh, can't be helped..." Kairi mumbled, trying to think of what to draw. "God I don't know what to paint..."

Sora looked around at the school scenery and spotted something interesting. "Paint that." He said, pointing to a red rose, the only one living among the other dying roses.

"That?" Kairi asked, not seeing what Sora saw in it.

"Yeah..."

"Why that?"

"Paint it, then think about it. Maybe it'll mean something to you in the future." Sora turned back to his own painting and started adding the color.

"Ok..." Kairi bit her lip and slowly dipped a small brush into the black ink. Looking over at Sora she asked him if it was the right sized brush.

"You might want to use a smaller one...just in case."

"Ok, this one?" She asked holding up a smaller paintbrush.

"Yeah, that's perfect. Now remember, use your arm for long strokes, not your hand." Sora said looking back at his almost finished piece.

"Ok..." Kairi said furrowing her brows in concentration. Sora looked over and nearly smiled. She was kind of cute when she was serious.

"Try not to use only black for the outline...maybe a hint of brown or something along the edges."

"Gotcha." Kairi said cleaning her little brush and dipping it into the brown paint.

Sora was now finished with his painting and was signing his name at the bottom.

"Ugh, you make me feel so slow!" Kairi pouted frowning at Sora.

"You'll get better...hopefully." Sora stated cleaning his brushes and putting them in the little case that sat on the easel.

"Hopefully..." Kairi muttered sarcastically turning back to her barely started painting.

"Now that you have the outline, start with the color." Kairi reached for a very bright red.

"No, not that one, that'll ruin it. Use that one." Sora said pointing towards a dark crimson color.

"Why that one..it's so dark, it's almost brown."

"Kairi, its autumn...besides that rose isn't too red."

Kairi nodded getting the idea and turned back to her painting. Losing her grip on her brush the paintbrush dropped, drawing a line across the canvas.

"Oh god I'm a failure!" Kairi whined looking at the canvas.

"Shut up. We can fix this." Sora said grabbing a small cloth from the side of the easel. Grabbing a little bar of oil he quickly rubbed it into the cloth and dabbed at the canvas. "There...it's barely noticeable."

"Wow...thanks."

"...no problem...just quit whining so much..." Sora mumbled sitting back down on his stool.

"Yeah...sorry." Kairi said turning back to her canvas, her hand was still wobbly in the strokes were coming out ragged.

"Here, like this." Sora said quietly, grabbing her hand and drawing a smooth stroke. "Not to hard, not too soft." He said drawing another. Kairi blushed madly, which caused Sora to blush and remove his hand. He quickly turned away and pulled at his face in attempts to get rid of that goofy blush.

"Thanks..." Kairi whispered, trying not to blush.

"No problem..." Sora said keeping his head turned away from her.

Kairi tried to think of something that would lead away from this embarrassing moment. "Hey Sora...what's you favorite candy?" She asked blushing beet red as she just realized what a stupid question that was.

Sora held back a chuckle at this and turned toward her, knowing that he was no longer red in the face. "I like starbursts and M&M's, what about you?." He asked, amused at Kairi's expression.

"I like reeses's...and gummy bears." Kairi said smiling.

"I used to like gummy bears...ate too many of them one day and well...you take a wild guess." Sora said remembering that horrid day.

"Haha, I love 'em...they're so cute. I like to bite of the heads first." Kairi said before thinking. She groaned angrily at herself after realizing what she had just said. "You must think I'm a kid..."

"No...I do stuff like that too. I like to eat all my orange M&M's first and I never eat the red ones because I think they're evil."

"Haha, evil? Why?" Kairi asked, putting her paint brush down to grab another.

"Reminds me of medicine for some reason."

"You scared of medicine?" Kairi asked chuckling.

"Naw, it's just nasty..." Sora muttered. "What's your favorite band? He asked before thinking. Why in the world was this conversation going so smoothly? And why the hell was he so interested in talking to her?

"Hoobastank...they're awesome." Kairi said excitedly. Sora held back a face of disgust (A/N: No offense everyone, Sora just doesn't like that type of music. ).

"That's cool." Sora stated looking at her painting. It wasn't that bad. She only needed a little more color.

"What's yours?"

"I don't have a favorite...I like a lot of bands, mostly metal bands...some emo...depends on the sound." Sora said playing with one of his many bracelets.

"Cool, I don't get that kind of music...hey, where did you get that bracelet?" Kairi asked looking at a silver one he had on. It was a small chain with a crown charm on it. The charm was slightly big and looked as if it should be a necklace charm.

"This one? Oh...I don't know...I've always had it." Sora said looking down at the charm. He remembered getting that necklace...or bracelet now. It was his most prized possession.

"It's pretty, was it a necklace?"

"Yeah...I need a bigger chain for it so I wear it as bracelet for now." Sora stated still looking at the charm. He couldn't help the tears that came to his eyes when he looked at it. He looked away quickly so Kairi wouldn't see it.

"Yep, I think it's ok..." Kairi said looking it over.

"I think it's great." Sora said catching her eye. Kairi blushed and looked at her hands. This was a first. A compliment on one of her paintings, it was almost too good to be true.

"Thank you." She said standing up. Sora stood also and picked up his canvas.

"Your welcome." He answered as they walked towards their teacher and placed their canvases with the others. The teacher then announced that class was over and that all the students who hadn't finished needed to come towards the front. Kairi looked down as Selphie passed with Roxas in tow she turned her attention away from them in hopes to calm her raging emotions. She looked over at Sora who was signing the sign out sheet the teacher demanded everyone sign for 'safety' reasons.

"Hey um...it was really nice talking to you." Kairi said nervously.

Sora bit his lip, not really knowing how to answer her comment. "Um...thanks..." He mumbled. "I'll see you later..." He whispered turning away. Kairi smiled softly, he was nervous also. The fact kind of made her feel less like a shy freak.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sora made his way to the entrance to of the school when he was stopped rudely by a strong hand. Sora closed blinked his eyes angrily and looked up into Riku's face. "Word at school says Kairi told Selphie that you were at my house." Riku whispered his voice low. Sora had learned that this meant he was extremely angry. "Why's that?"

"...I tried to fix it..." Sora mumbled looking down at his hand.

"You 'tried'?" Riku asked sarcastically. He then made a fist and punched Sora square in the stomach. "Now how am I supposed to explain this?!" Riku roared punching him again. Sora didn't make a noise but only closed his eyes in pain. "Answer me you piece of shit!"

"I don't know." Sora said gasping as he felt Riku's fist collide with his jaw.

"Yeah you do, why didn't you put an end to it, huh?!" Riku yelled punching him in the stomach. Sora gasped, unwanted tears springing to his eyes.

"Hey, leave him the hell alone!" A voice yelled coming out of nowhere. Sora's breath caught in his throat. Not him. Anyone but him. Riku stopped and turned to see who it was, as he was turning he pinned Sora to the wall with one of his hands preventing an escape. His hand was around Sora's neck cutting off his air supply causing Sora to gasp in pain.

Riku ignored this and snickered nastily. "Oh...the new kid...trying to make friends with the freak huh?"

Roxas frowned angrily. "Leave him alone." He yelled approaching the two. It was all too familiar this picture. The only change was this kid being in his old place. He had no idea why he decided to interfere. Maybe it was stupidity, or maybe it was the feeling of a need to change something about the picture. He had always prayed someone would stop they bully at his old school from beating him up. Maybe it was sympathy. He didn't know. All he knew was that whatever emotion was behind this act was making him feel angry.

"Make me." Riku snickered looking down at the smaller boy. Roxas smirked at this. Before Riku knew it was coming Roxas had punched him right in the jaw. Riku fell back holding his face a muttering curse words.

"Are you ok?" Roxas asked rushing over to Sora. He placed his hand on Sora's shoulder as a worried gesture but Sora quickly slapped it away.

"I'm fine. Go away." Sora said biting his lip and narrowing his eyes. He felt as if he were about to faint.

"No you're not. You need to go to the nurse or something."

"Don't tell me what to do. Leave me alone. I don't want or need your attention." Sora yelled in between gasps.

"Yes you do. Stop being stubborn. I'm taking you to the nurse." He said grabbing Sora's arm. Sora panicked and punched him in the stomach.

"Don't touch me!" He yelled trying to hide his fear. "Get the hell away from me already!" Sora bit his lip and absentmindedly noticed that Riku was no longer around. This made him even more panicked for some reason.

Roxas pulled back, the punch hurt, but it wasn't that bad. He had felt worse. Plus, martial arts helped when it came to preparing yourself for attacks. "Are you alright...?" He asked. The boy was acting strange, like he was afraid of being touched or something. Roxas suddenly felt something towards the boy. A connection. The feeling he felt the first time he saw him in their biology class came back to him in a rush. Why in the world did this boy seem so familiar?

"I'm. Fine." Sora said through his teeth. He tried to stand but gasped and bent back down again.

"Hey...I'm gonna go to the nurse ok?" Roxas said looking at Sora. Sora looked down nervously he was about to say something when Roxas spoke up again. "Just for some pain killer, I'll say it's for me."

Sora didn't say anything but kept looking down, the nervous panicked look never leaving his face.

"Is that ok with you? I won't if you don't want me too."

"It's fine..." Sora said, just wanting him to go away for a few minutes so he could at least regain his composure.

"Ok...I'll be right back." Roxas said standing to leave. He ran back inside in search of the nurses office his mind trying to remember where he had seen the boy before.

Meanwhile, Sora sat, his back against one of the school pillars, his eyes closed trying to calm down. He was so worked up right now. He had talked to him. He had talked to Roxas. The last time he had talked to him was ten years ago. They were five. Almost six. It was so surreal. Before he knew it Roxas was back.

"Hey, I got you the pain killer...I hope it helps." He said handing Sora the medicine and tossing him a water bottle that he bought from a vending machine.

Sora looked at the medicine. It was red. It reminded him of the conversation he had with Kairi twenty minutes earlier. It seemed so far away right now.

"Thank you..." He whispered, it was barely audible but Roxas heard it.

"No problem." He said smiling. After Sora had swallowed the pill he held his hand out for him to take. Sora looked at it cautiously. He thought about if he should take it or not, it wasn't a dangerous gesture or one that made him too uncomfortable. He decided he'd take it even though it felt very awkward.

The bell rang for the end of lunch as Sora slowly stood up. "Whoa...we'd better get to class." Roxas said grabbing his bag.

"I'm...sorry I wasted your time..."

"Hey, I had nothing to do anyway, and I wasn't hungry...don't worry about it."

Sora bit his lip nervously and made his way slowly to the biology classroom with a limp. Roxas followed with a worried look on his face.

"Are you sure your going to be alright?" Roxas asked as they reached their classroom door.

"Yeah..." Sora answered quietly walking in quickly so Tifa could fuss over him as usual and then walk quickly to his seat. Roxas frowned and followed him in, the rest of the class behind them.

All throughout biology he was troubled with thought about the goth boy who was so familiar. He then realized he didn't even know his name. Maybe that would give him some answers. Maybe it would make him remember. Maybe the boy was from the part of his life he couldn't recall. Maybe his name would awaken the six years of his life he couldn't remember. The first six years of his life that he yearned to know about so bad. Maybe, just maybe it would clear things up.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Walking home in November is like walking through paradise. The trees, the sunshine, the blowing wind. It makes me want to bottle the feeling and keep it forever. It hurts every time I turn the bend, I face the house. What a beauty they say, you must be so happy here. I laugh. A sick twisted laugh. This house. This house wasn't a beauty. It was a little piece of hell this house. It isn't a home. This house isn't a home. Homes are places we long for, homes are filled with family, loved ones...joy. This house is full of hate, anger...despair. This house isn't safe. Nobody wants to live somewhere they aren't safe. What happens when the people who are supposed to care for you when your hurt, are the ones who hurt you in the first place? They say I should be happy. That I'm lucky. I just laugh. I always laugh. This house isn't a home. It's the train station to hell. And I'm an everyday passenger.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review Responses!

Black-Dax- Hehe, well no actually. That little chapter was pretty confusing I guess. It's not really a Riku Sora thing. Nice guess though. Thanks for reviewing even though it was so short!

Evil Genius of the COCA- Hehe, I wanted to huggle Sora the whole time I was writing that. Poor Sora UU. Kairi will, sort of. A girl can't make all of his problems go away you know. :) Thanks for reviewing this short little chappy!

Malcolm Yuy- Roxas is Sora's foster brother? Nope! Nice guess. :) Thanks for the compliment, I know it was pretty morbid, it kind of had to be. (And I love writing morbid poems...I don't know why.) Thanks, and thank you for reviewing!

HyperShadowGirl11228- It appeared to be confusing for everyone. :( OH well. Thanks for liking it! And no, Riku and Sora didn't like each other. Sorry. :) Thanks for reviewing!

angelofsweetness- Yep, confusing. I'm glad you got it though:) Yes, poor Sora. I really pity him. (I've made his life such a mess...) Anyways, thank you so much for reviewing!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Thanks for reviewing guys! Please review again!


	13. 2 Questions Who am I and why am I here?

A/N: For this chapter the headings are in Roxas's voice, not Sora's. Just to let you know.

A/N: I know the character development is going really slow…just hang in there please, I'm trying not to rush it too much.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I don't know why I'm living sometimes. I've always been called a miracle child, an angel, something sent from the one and only god. I don't believe them. How can I? I don't even know why I am this 'special'. I've asked them plenty of times why I'm considered a miracle. They said I had an accident, and that's all. Sometimes I wonder why they hide it. Why they don't tell me the truth. Why my parents look nothing like me. Why they have never let me see my birth certificate. Why I can't remember anything before six years old. I don't know why and I want some answers. But what happens when answers are questions? Where do you go from there?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Roxas sweetie, come downstairs, breakfast is ready!"

"Coming Mom!" Roxas yelled, shoving the phonebook and news articles he was reading under his bed. He couldn't let her see those. Not on his life. She'd get suspicious. He knew he was safe however, his mother never ventured into his room on Saturday's.

"Hey baby, want some eggs?" Roxas's mother asked, giving him a hug when he entered the spacious kitchen. Roxas took a look at the burnt eggs and wrinkled his nose.

"Uh…I'll just have toast. I'm not that hungry." Roxas said smiling while reaching for the bread basket.

"You're not hungry? Jeeze, are you sick dear?" His mother asked putting her hand to his head.

"I'm fine Mom, really." Roxas smiled shrugging her hand off. "I'm going go down to the restaurant to see if Dad needs any help." He said grabbing his jacket.

"Ok sweetie, be careful when you cross the streets!"

"Mom, I'm driving."

"That's what I mean. Be careful when you cross the streets."

"Uh…sure thing Mom." Roxas said laughingly, he grabbed his keys and quickly made his way outside. The air was chilly and Roxas quickly put on his jacket before his mother yelled out for him to do so.

They had just moved here about two weeks ago. His father owned a new restaurant in town that was becoming increasingly popular. It was the reason they moved. Well, that's what they told everyone outside of the family. The reason they moved was because of Roxas. When Roxas's parents suspected something, they moved. It was as simple of that. Roxas hated this however and it caused his emotions to run wild. Sometimes they had to move just because of the fact that Roxas somehow got in trouble in school. Most times it was the other way around though. Roxas was dying to know what his parents were hiding from him. He wanted to know why they never mentioned any outside family and that for all Roxas knew he had no extended family at all.

Roxas jumped into his 'baby' a '67 blue mustang. His parents had bought it for him for his 16th birthday. He'd only had it for about a week. Roxas turned on the radio as he backed out of the driveway all the while aware of his mother watching him through the window. Roxas smiled at this. His mother was way too protective, but for some reason it only made him feel special. He admitted it with no shame: he was a Mamma's boy.

It was only a few blocks away, his dad's restaurant. Roxas hummed along to a couple of songs he knew as he made his way to his destination. It was almost December, Roxas kept thinking. And yes he would admit this too without any shame: He still loved making cookies, putting up a stocking, and waiting for 'Santa' to deliver all of his presents. Of course he didn't believe in Santa (He'd only recently stopped believing in him- two years ago actually) but he still liked to pretend.

Upon reaching the restaurant, Roxas parked his car and quickly went inside to escape the coming rain.

"Hey son, what's up?" His dad yelled from across the restaurant. Roxas sniffed in the smell of fresh baked bread and sighed happily. He loved the smell of bread.

"Nothing much, just wanted to see if you could use any help." Roxas asked looking around. The store was fairly empty because it hadn't opened up for the day.

"Actually no, I've hired a few more waiters and waitresses. You could help me however by getting their aprons and things in the back. You'll find them in the kitchen."

"Sure thing." Roxas answered. Grabbing a roll from inside the walk in bakery, he made his way to the back room to grab a box of supplies. Upon entering the kitchen Roxas set the things down and decided to locate the newbie's who were somewhere inside this massive room.

"Hello?" He called walking down an aisle. After locating a few of them, he handed them their aprons and other unnecessary things and went on his way.

"I think that's all of them." He said to himself as he looked at the one apron he still held in his hand.

"Um…I think that's mine." He heard a voice say. Roxas turned and smiled at the girl he saw.

"Hey, you're from school…Namine right?"

"Yeah…" Namine answered blushing. Whatever was left of her reputation had now been flushed down the drain.

"Nice to see you again." Roxas said smiling, handing her the apron. Namine took it and put in quickly.

"What…what should I do know?" She asked looking around timidly.

"Um…I'm not sure. You could go back out to the front, maybe my dad has something for you to do…if not we could just talk." Roxas said before thinking, he blushed red and turned his head away slowly. "…if you want to." He added.

Namine blushed at this. "Sure…I'll go see if there's anything to do…" She said. She turned away and then added, "If not…I'll take you up on your offer." She stated walking out of the kitchen.

Roxas smiled at this and leaned against a countertop, bored out of his wits. His thoughts wondered to the events of yesterday and his 'research'. Roxas had suddenly gotten the idea that he was adopted. It was a long shot, but maybe it was true. He had been calling dozen's of social service homes, foster homes, adoption agencies, but none knew his name or had any idea who he was. There's was only one more phone number he had left. It was for a foster care agency.

"Lakeshire Foster Care Network." Roxas said out loud, looking at the piece of paper in his hands. He dialed the number on his cell phone and waited for someone to pick up.

"Hello, Lakeshire Foster Care Network."

"Hello, my name is Roxas Donaven. I have a few questions to ask your agency."

"Ok, I'm going to put you through to one of our social workers."

"Thanks." Roxas said playing with his jacket zipper.

"Hello, Cecilia Vanderval, how may I help you?"

"Hello, my name is Roxas Donaven, I was wondering if you could help me."

"…Roxas Donaven?"

"Yes…?"

"Um, what is it do you want to know?"

"Am I in your records, I'm just curious."

"I can't give out this information to unknown caller."

"…So how could I find out?"

"How old are you, Roxas."

"16."

"…You'll need to have a parents consent, and you'll need to come down to the agency."

"Ok…thanks for your help."

"Your welcome. Good-bye."

Roxas sighed as he shut his cell phone off. No luck there. He should probably just give up he thought.

"Roxas? Roxas you in here?"

"Yeah dad, I'm over here." Roxas said quietly, opening and closing his phone.

"Hey Roxas, I was wondering where you were. Mr. Wakayama is here with his family to give this restaurant a review, it's very important so we have to impress him. I want you to meet him; it'll give this restaurant a family feel."

"…Mr. Wakayama?" Roxas asked looking up at his tall father.

"Yeah, richest man in town. Come on now." Roxas's father said ushering his son out of the kitchen. Roxas followed his father over to a table by one of the windows but stopped when he saw who was there. Riku. Just his luck.

"Hello Mr. Wakayama and family. How are you today?" Roxas's father said cheerily.

"Fine, fine…let's just make this quick…" Mr. Wakayama said stirring his water with his straw absentmindedly.

"…Right. What will you have today, Sir." Roxas's father asked a little unnerved.

"Whatever…just anything without pickles, tomatoes, pepper, green pepper, red pepper, yellow pepper, onions, garlic, lettuce, potatoes, green onion, and olives."

Riku snickered at this and picked up his water to drink it but then decided to pour it on the floor.

"Oops, my mistake…hey waitress, come clean this up!" Riku hollered in Namine's direction.

"That's ok, Namine, I've got it." Roxas said grabbing a towel from on of the tables.

"Excuse me, but isn't that the waitresses job?" Riku's mother asked smirking. "It would be horrible if we had to put in your review that your son does the job of a lowly waitress." She said smirking again at the blond boy.

"Namine, please clean the mess." Roxas's dad sad angrily, he quickly made his way to the kitchen to gather his chefs and try to prepare a meal with such guidelines. Meanwhile, Roxas was left just standing in front of the table.

"So.." Riku's father started, he took a drink of water slowly, eyes never leaving Roxas's face. "You were the one who punched my son, eh?"

Roxas gulped and rubbed the back of his neck. He took a quick glance to the kitchen door before answering. "Yeah."

"Why?"

"Because he was beating up another kid…" Roxas stated looking over at Namine who was busy cleaning the mess up.

"Oh Namine, you missed a spot." Riku stated pointing to his shoe. Roxas sent him a dirty look but kept quiet. Namine blushed madly and dabbed her cloth on his shoe before standing up hurriedly.

"You look so much better as the poor girl dear Nami." Riku stated, grinning evilly. Namine ignored this and walked away, her head bent in shame.

Roxas clenched his fists angrily but stopped when Riku's dad spoke up again. "What kid?"

"…Just a kid, I don't know his name."

"Well no kid is worth punching my Riku."

"Yeah whatever." Roxas muttered looking at his watch. "I gotta go, have a nice day."

Roxas walked away from the table and angrily grabbed his keys from behind the front desk of the restaurant and stomped outside.

"Roxas!" Namine yelled following him.

"Hey." Roxas said turning giving her a forced smile.

"Are you ok…I'm sorry if I made you mad."

"No, it's not you. Really. Riku's a bastard and I'm just a pissed." Roxas said, looking at Riku through the restaurant window.

"…Yeah…I should've figured that a long time ago."

"Hey…um, I'll see you later ok?"

"Yeah, see you later." Namine said quietly in her accented voice.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Dark posters, black clothes and dozens of drawings littered the empty room. Sticky notes and homework littered the neatly made bed along with a dozen fluffy panda's and two dozen baby white seal stuffed animals. An empty bag of M&M's was on the black side table, the red M&M's left on the desk in the shape of a heart. Off in the connected bathroom, a boy stood with bandages on his wrists and a stick of eyeliner in his hand.

"I'm fine…really." Sora said quietly into the cell phone he had up to his ear.

"I'm just worried about you Sora." The voice on the other end said equally as quiet.

"Aeris, don't worry about me." Sora muttered, applying the eye liner. It would cover most of the bruise around his eye.

"Ok…how was your birthday, sweetheart."

"It was alright…" Sora said biting his lip. He looked down at one of his bandaged arms. It was fractured. That was his birthday present.

"What did you do?"

"…Nothing really, just…stayed at home pretty much." Sora lied, grabbing his black nail polish.

"You didn't do anything fun?"

"Naw…I didn't want to do anything." Sora answered painting his nails his favorite color.

"Sora…you turned 16. Good grief."

"Aeris, 16 isn't such a big deal." Sora said pretending to be annoyed. "How's your niece?" He asked, switching the subject.

"She's doing ok…just crazy about some popular guy at school."

Sora laughed quietly, why did the girls always feel the need to go chasing after guys who weren't worth it? "Interesting. Wait hold on, I have a call coming in." Sora clicked the button to see who it was. He dropped the f-bomb loudly when he saw the number for the Lakeshire Foster Care Network.

"Hey Aeris, I gotta go…It's my social worker."

"Ok sweetie…just…are you sure nothings wrong?"

Sora reached for his cover up make-up on the counter and quickly dabbed at his face to cover up the bruises he had received that morning from Riku's angry father.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Roxas locked his car and entered his house quietly; he wasn't in the mood for chatting with his Mom at the moment and wanted to get upstairs without being noticed.

"Roxas dear, is that you?" His mother called from the kitchen.

"Yeah Mom." Roxas sighed annoyed.

"Ok good, I'm going out in a few minutes, you'll be home alone."

"I know Mom, I'll be fine."

"Are you sure, you don't want me to call Ms. Harris?"

"Mom I don't need a babysitter…" Roxas sighed walking upstairs.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"What do you want Cecilia?" Sora asked annoyed.

"I'm just calling to check up on you, Sora."

"Yeah well I'm fine."

"How are things going?"

"I said I'm fine Cecilia." Sora muttered, applying black lipstick and putting on his glasses.

"You don't sound fine."

"Well whatever." Sora growled setting down his cell phone long enough to pull a black hoodie over his head.

"Sora?"

"What?" Sora left the bathroom and grabbed a beanie with a bill and put it on. "Hurry this up Cecilia, I have to go somewhere."

"Sora…"

"What?!" Sora yelled angrily. He grabbed his keys and wallet and then ran down the luxurious twisting stairway.

"I have to tell you… oh…nothing, I'll talk to you later."

Sora hung up the phone without saying good bye and walked outside, locking the doors behind him. He had to go pick up Riku at that new restaurant to bring him home in time to have his 'study date' with Kairi. It was a half an hour drive to the restaurant and Sora took the time to ruin Riku's stereos by blasting his music as loud as it would go. It was the only way to make his thoughts of _him_ fade away.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Roxas was lying on his bed, his eyes closed in thought. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe he wasn't adopted. Maybe he was just different, weird. Maybe he just wouldn't ever remember. Maybe it was only his mind playing tricks on him. It was always a maybe.

Roxas lifted his head when he heard his cell-phone ring and flipped it over to see who was calling. Lakeshire Foster Care Network was on the caller ID. Roxas's heart thudded in his chest as he quickly grabbed the phone and answered it.

"Hello?"

"Hi this is Cecilia Vanderval…I believe we talked earlier?"

"Yeah."

"When was your birthday Roxas?"

"A week ago."

"The date, please?"

"Oh um, November 14th."

"What's your middle name, Roxas."

"I don't have one."

"May I ask your social security number?"

"Um…why?"

"I think I may have your birth certificate. That's the last thing I need to know to confirm it."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I can be cool, charming, emotional, angry, sad, happy, and an all out loser. I don't know who I want to be. I've tried on all the costumes but none of them work. I've tried to be strong when I'm weak; I've tried to be weak when I'm strong. The emotional pressure of feeling wanted has always haunted me. The emotional pressure of feeling unwanted has always haunted me. I don't know where I stand in this world. It feels like I'm caught in the middle. I can't go up, and I can't go down.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review responses!

**Shadowtailmon-** Thanks for reviewing! Lol, he kind of was wasn't he?

**acquired.minds-** I'm glad you love it! Means a lot to me. Thanks for reviewing!

**Evil Genius of the COCA-** Ah my ever dedicated reviewer thanks for reviwing! Wow...awesome theory there. I won't say It's correct or not (It would give it away) Keeping thinking in that direction though. :)

**HyperShadowGirl11228-** You have a good idea my friend (Seriously) Thanks for reviewing! Oh yeah, you'll find out soon enough.

**angelofsweetness-** I'm glad you loved it! I thought the conversation between Sora and Kairi was pretty cute too. I'm making myself hate Riku too. :( Thanks for reviewing!

**KHgirl23**- Thanks a lot! Review again!

**Malcolm Yuy**- Thanks you! I really enjoy your reviews. I liked the interaction too. It was fun writing. :) Review again!

**Kupo3.0**- Thank you for reviewing! I loved this chapter especially because of the Sora and Kairi interaction. I thought it was pretty cute. Lol, the Roxas thing won't be too confusing after the next few chapters. I'm not going to make it that complicated. Hehe, the emo-ness…gotta love it. Review again!

**Becky13474-** Thank you:) Review again!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

And Now to thank some other people….I'd like to thank those of you who have never reviewed even though my story is on your favorite and or alert list (that's about 20 of you) I'm glad you like the story, and I like you guys, seriously, but it would be really nice if you just left** ONE** review. Anyways, glad you like the story!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Till next time.

Peace.


	14. Answers always pay a price, I'm in debt

A/N: No heading for this chapter…little song thingy at the end kind of fills that in. This chapter was _really_ **HARD **to write for some reason and I wasn't planning to update it for a few weeks…but yeah that would've sucked so I gave it my best shot…so… **cut me some slack if you hate it! **And yeah, I'm up late and I'm frickin' tired so that adds to it…so enjoy if you can!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"So…the report's almost done." Kairi said nervously, looking around Riku's den just to have something to do.

"Yeah…" Riku answered bored. He was trying to think up a way to make asking Kairi out a little easier. He felt like gagging right now at the thought of even being her date for a few hours.

"I think It's pretty good…we should get an A." Kairi stated, looking him in the eyes shyly. Hot was the only word going through her mind right now.

"Hey Kairi, who are you going to the Christmas dance with?" Riku asked suddenly.

"Um…no one right now." She answered blushing in embarrassment. Almost everyone at school had a date; Selphie probably had one for all she knew.

"You know the dance is in like…one week."

"Yeah um…I don't think I'm gonna go. I'm not really one for big gatherings." Kairi said looking down at her hands.

Riku gulped softly and forced himself to say the words he dreaded saying. "How about I be your date for the dance?"

Kairi looked up suddenly and blushed tomato red. "M-me?" She managed to stutter out.

"Yeah you." Riku replied, putting on a false smile. This was too easy.

"…W-why?"

"I don't know, you seem like a pretty nice girl, and now that Namine's not an option I had to pick someone. So I picked you."

These words didn't even faze Kairi. All she heard was "I picked you." Kairi could swear she was on cloud nine right now. Her life suddenly looked so much brighter.

"O-ok…I'll go with you." Kairi said smiling softly. Riku actually felt guilty for a second when she did.

Sora who was leaning against the stairway upstairs also felt guilty. Kairi was so gullible and lonely. She didn't know she was about to end up broken hearted. Sora decided he would give her a warning, a small one. He wouldn't say anything about the prank for Riku would literally beat the crap out of him, but he would warn her. She was the closest thing to a friend he had and even though they weren't friends he felt as if he owed her this for being friendly towards him. It was the least he could do.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hi…I'm Roxas Donaven. A social worker named Cecilia Vanderval said I could stop by and talk to her for a few minutes."

"Ah ok, she's busy right now, she'll be done in about ten minutes." The woman at the front desk said smiling softly at the boy.

"Ok, thanks." Roxas said quietly taking a seat in the lounge. It was a three hour drive here. Roxas knew he would be in trouble when he got home, serious trouble. But he didn't care; he had to know the truth. If the birth certificate wasn't his, at least he knew he'd reach the end of the road. If it was, well then he'd fine some answers to his life long questions.

"Roxas Donaven?" A woman from inside one of the office rooms poked her head outside the door, searching the lounge.

"Right here." Roxas said giving her a small smile.

The woman smiled softly back at him and nodded her head for him to come into her office.

"I'm Cecilia Vanderval, nice to meet you Roxas." Cecilia said shutting the door to her office. "Please sit down." She said as she made her way around to her desk.

Roxas at down nervously and looked at the photos that were sitting on her desk.

"Those are pictures of the foster children I'm in charge of." Cecilia said smiling at the pictures. "They're great kids."

Roxas nodded looking closely at one of them. It was of a spiky chocolate haired kid of about eight, he was frowning and looked like his childhood innocence had been sucked out of him. His face was familiar. Very familiar.

"Ah, that one is special…it was taken about eight years ago. He won't let me have another picture of him." Cecilia said quietly, looking at the photo Roxas was looking at.

"I'm sorry…just a little curious." Roxas said looking her in the face.

"That's all right. Now, for what you came for?"

"Yeah…here's my social security number." Roxas said passing her a piece of paper. The woman looked at it and sighed softly then looked up at him slowly.

"I have your birth certificate Roxas…though I thought your parents would have shown it to you."

"They won't let me see it for some reason."

"They have their reasons as to why."

"I need to know…I need to see it."

"There are…there are a lot of things that I cannot tell you. Things that your birth certificate will bring up that I cannot explain to you."

"I don't care…I just want to see it."

"Very well." She said quietly, handing him his certificate.

Roxas looked at it and gulped. The certificate confirmed his beliefs. He was adopted. But what he didn't understand was his last name, Donaven, was the same, yet his parents names weren't. It was all too confusing.

"...I know it's shocking…" Cecilia said quietly.

"Was…was I adopted or…?" Roxas asked his voice wavering.

"I cannot tell you. That is your parent's job."

"They're not my parent's."

"They are your legal guardians. Your parents."

Roxas looked back down on the certificate. Everything else was accurate. His birthday. Where he was born. But then something caught his eye. Roxas gasped and felt as if he couldn't breathe for a second. Under the Type Of Birth section the space for twin was checked. He was the firstborn.

"I have a sibling?" Roxas asked looking up at Cecilia.

"You had a sibling."

"He or she is dead…where is he…?"

"I cannot tell you. That is your parent's job."

"Why can't you tell me?" Roxas asked angrily.

"It's confidential."

"I have the right to know!" Roxas yelled standing up.

"No you don't. I told you before we even started that some things I just can't tell you." Cecilia said standing up as well.

"My…guardians…won't tell me." Roxas whispered.

"Well then I'm sorry. You will find out when you turn 18. I have a meeting in five minutes; I need you to take your leave."

"May I take it…my birth certificate?"

"I'll make a copy for you, hold on a second." She said walking out the door.

Roxas slumped back into his chair and buried his head in his arms. This was too much. His parents weren't his parents. He had a sibling that was somewhere out there that he desperately wanted to meet. His whole world had shattered. Who was he? Why was he here? And why wouldn't anyone tell him the truth?

"Here Roxas…" Cecilia said handing him his certificate. "Have a nice day." She said closing the door behind him after he left.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora?!"

"I'm right here, Riku." Sora mumbled closing his biology lab book. Studying was over for now.

"Whatever. You have to do my math homework, I'm busy."

"…Riku I'm kind of busy with my own homework, and you're a grade ahead of me."

"I've seen you do this kind of stuff before besides, your only in that grade cause I said so." Riku said throwing him his math book and the homework to go with it.

"Riku I'm busy and besides, I'll get in trouble if I do your work."

"Who the hell cares?!" Riku yelled angrily.

"I do. I'm the one who's going to get in trouble if this gets out."

"You know what? Fine. You can just answer to Dad." Riku yelled stomping out of the room to tattle like a three year old. Sora shuddered angrily. He was going to get it. Badly. And it was just because Riku couldn't sit his ass down and do his own homework.

Sora waited a few minutes for the loud bellow that was sure to come. And indeed it did a few seconds later.

"Sora! Get your lazy ass down here now!"

Sora cringed inwardly and quickly got up from his bed and began the long dreadful walk to the office. Upon arriving he shuddered once again when he saw that both Riku and his mother were there. This was going to be humiliating.

"Yes?" He asked quietly, glancing around the room nervously.

"Why won't you do Riku's work." The man asked in his eerily quiet voice. The voice only meant one thing: Sora was most definitely going to get a beating out of this one.

"B-because...it wouldn't be right." Sora whispered biting his lip.

"Oh? So you suddenly know right from wrong eh?" Sora didn't answer this. It would be a useless attempt to save his butt. Sora braced himself for the impact that was sure to come. And as he expected, a fist came flying and punched him square in the jaw. Sora gasped and fell back against the office wall holding his cheek. It hurt like hell, but then it always did.

"So you think you're better than Riku now? Because you only want to do what's 'right'?" The man yelled throwing another punch, this one hitting Sora's stomach. Sora gasped and desperately tried to get a hold of himself before he started crying. This one hurt much more than the other for the fact that he'd been hit in the same spot three times that day.

"Answer me!" The man screamed grabbing Sora's shoulder and snapping it out of place.

"No…I don't." Sora managed to say between gasps of pain. All he wanted was to die right now. Why didn't he just kill him? Why did he put him through all this hell but wouldn't just put an end to it? Why did he keep him here if he hated him so much?

"Then who do you think you are? You think you're important, huh?" The man asked his voice lowering slightly. He grabbed the shoulder he had just previously snapped and threw Sora across room. Sora landed against the huge ivory desk hitting his head on the corner of the writing table and his arm slamming against the side of it. Sora couldn't help the tears that fell that this time. He held his wrist that had landed harshly against the side of the desk to his chest. It was broken for sure along with his pride. He had to wonder how many times a person's heart and pride could be broken.

Sora looked up for a second and his eyes caught Riku's laughing ones. It was always like this. Riku was always laughing at him like this was some comedy. Riku's mother would always smirk and never stop her husband and Riku's father would just get his daily 'workout' and never feel any guilt. None of them ever felt guilt.

"You aren't worth shit you little piece of crap!" Riku's father spat kicking Sora repeatedly in the stomach. Sora closed his eyes and smiled softly. It was a disturbed smile. The kind you see on a psycho killers face before he kills his newest victim. The kind you see on a mentally confused person when they see the horrors of the world glaring at them on their televisions. It was at this time it didn't hurt. The time when the pain made him feel so high he couldn't feel it anymore. It was about this time he closed his eyes and forgot. It was at this time that he wished that the man's fist was the last thing he'd ever seen. But wishes never come true. He knew that, but he'd enjoy this false happiness while he had the chance.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_Maybe someday this world will see,_

_Because I'm not going to be around when it falls,_

_Do let them know I was here,_

_Let them know I despise my insides,_

Roxas laid his head on the steering wheel of his car and sighed. What now? Was the only question running through his head. He didn't know what to do, what to think. His thoughts were haunted by images of the piece of paper in left hand. Who was he? Why was he here? Roxas bit his lip in frustration. All his life he had been trying to fit in, to be a part of something bigger than his low self esteem. Now all of that was to pieces. He didn't even know where he came from.

_I'm gonna play the game like the rest,_

_Life is a speed bump on my way to success,_

_Drop the lights and grab your shadows,_

_I need a blanket for the heat of this world,_

Roxas closed his eyes as he approached a stop light and turned on his radio to try and block his thoughts. The loud music made his ears hurt but didn't drown out the ramped emotions running in frenzy around his brain.

_Tonight we'll dine in starlight,_

_I'll tell you I'm not worth the sorrow,_

_Let's sing a song about my image,_

_I'll get gone before tomorrow,_

Before Roxas knew it he was driving past the infamous Bastion Hills. Roxas looked over at the biggest house in the neiborhood. Such a big friendly looking house. It was probably filled with a happy family getting ready for the holiday season. Roxas turned his face back to the road and sighed. Where was his family? Where was his sibling that was somewhere out there either above or below the ground. Was his sibling happy? Roxas turned off the music as he neared his home and sighed as he saw three police cars in the driveway.

_So when I vanish tell them I was special,_

_That I should have remained in this hell,_

_But don't tell me I was wanted,_

_I've already painted my image,_

_Don't let me die in vain for myself,_

_I'll let denial kill my senses,_

_For I'm not the beloved friend you seek,_

_I'm the fallen portrait from the sky,_

_I'll keep believing my lies._

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review Responses!

**KHgirl23-** Glad you liked it! Review again! 

**shadowtailmon**- Lol, well you got the new chappy! Review again!

**aquired.minds**- Aww, thanks!  Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**xx-Tragic-Serenadexxx**- Thank you! Sorry I didn't have an end and beginning paragraphs for this chapter :( Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**Tater Tots**- Hehe, yeah it's pretty different. Some people think it's too OOC but who cares, its fanfiction. Glad you liked it! Review again:)

**Becky13474**- Thanks a lot! Please review again. :)

**Malcolm Yuy**- No reviewers annoy the heck out of me…I really shouldn't be put off by it but…ugh. Anyways, I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter! (You seem to be my toughest reviewers…don't ask me why but I appreciate it… anyway, a good review from you makes me happy!) Yes, I hated writing that part…makes me mad. Thanks for reviewing:) Review again!

**key46812**- Thanks for reviewing! I love Sora as a goth, it's pretty awesome.  Review again!

**creativedreamer48-** Thanks for reviewing! (A nice long review too gives cookie) I'm glad you like the story, makes writing it worth it. Yes, I'm pretty sad about Riku being the jerk he is but…somebody had to play the part (I was thinking Roxas at first but that just wouldn't work). I would comment on everything you wrote, but my eyelids are barely staying open right now. :) Oh and yes, you are the review responses obviously. (Lol, I've always wanted to be in a review response…never got the chance though) Anyways, I'm rambling, thanks for reviewing and review again!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: Ok…I'm not really sure when the next chapter will show up, I'm pretty dead at the moment…not getting enough sleep…doing too much work…yeah. I'll try to have it up soon. I'm starting a new story soon so I'm trying to write a couple of chapters for each story here and there. Anyways…here I go going on about un-needed stuff. Till the next chapter-

Peace


	15. What's Your Name? Do you know me? Not

A/N: This chapter was annoying to write…I don't know, it was just a pain in the butt to start writing. Hope you guys like it because I don't.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sometimes I wake up and feel like I'm someone else. I like to pretend my life isn't a pit and that I'm your average teenage guy. That all I worry about is surviving high school and staying popular. That I never have to worry about being alone. That I'd walk down stairs and grimace when my mother gives me a hug. I like to pretend I'm normal sometimes. But reality is such a cruel reality. I can't pretend that I'm normal, that people want me. Because the truth is they don't. Know one would care if I dropped dead in front of their eyes. No one would attend my funeral if I committed suicide. They call me a freak so that's my name. You go behind that and the insults come screaming. I should be used to it. But it never gets old.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

D+. That was the grade that was circled in a red marker on his biology exam. Another one of these and he'd lose his A in the class. It's not like it mattered to him. He wasn't trying to get into any fancy colleges or universities. He just wanted to paint. He just wanted to paint because it was the only thing that made him happy.

"Sora, are you ok? Tifa asked softly when she handed him his test back. Sora didn't answer but kept his eyes on his paper. He did this because for one, he didn't want to see the disappointment in his favorite teacher's eyes, and two, because he didn't want to show the bruises on his face that he had failed to cover that morning. Having passed out from last nights 'argument' he woke up with barely enough time to get to class. He was planning to cover them up in the bathroom during lunch, but as usual, the jocks got to him first. Sora hoped that the hoodie he was wearing would hide his face long enough to get the bathroom after class unnoticed.

"Sora?" Tifa prodded quietly as the class started filing in.

"…Yes?" Was his barely audible reply as he continued to stare at the paper.

"…You can tell me anything, you know that." Tifa said even quieter as the class started taking there seats.

"Yeah…" The brunette stated turning his head to the side. Tifa frowned sadly and made her way back to her desk. She knew something was wrong. That something wasn't right with the boy and somebody else besides the jocks at school were hurting him. It was impossible, however, to break the shell the boy always had around him. He never let his guard down.

Roxas was the last student to walk in the door. He was late which wasn't like him at all. But he didn't care; he was too busy trying get answers. No, he hadn't given up yet. He was going to find out about his past and find his missing sibling. Neither the social worker nor his parents were going to stop him.

On Saturday night he had come home to find his parents desperately calling all over the island for him. The police had even started a search party after Roxas hadn't returned for five hours. His parents were livid when he stepped through the door, his left hand clenched around his newly found birth certificate. His punishment: no use of his car for a month. Roxas was upset, but it wasn't as bad as he thought. It was worth losing his car for four weeks in turn for having his birth certificate.

Roxas scanned the room and noticed that the only seat unoccupied was the seat next to the goth kid. Unlike other students, Roxas saw no fear in sitting next to him and immediately walked over and took his seat.

Tifa walked through the rows of lab desks and handed out the other students lab tests. When she reached Roxas she smiled.

"A+, good job." She stated handing him his test. His grade was circled in the corner with a little smiley face drawn on next to it. Roxas smiled at this.

"Thanks." He said pushing the test to the side and pulling out his lab book. Tifa smiled and walked back to her desk to begin her class.

"Hey." Roxas said turning to look at Sora. Sora bit his lip nervously and didn't answer him.

"Is something wrong?" Roxas asked trying to see his face that was hidden by his hoodie.

"No." Sora replied glancing over at Roxas and then looking back down getting a look at Roxas's exam. _'A+. Ha, he always did outshine me.'_

"Oh um…I was wondering…what's your name?" Roxas asked looking over again, trying to get to the point of why he started this conversation.

"Roxas, class has started." Tifa said from the front of the room. Roxas blushed and opened his lab book ceasing his speaking for the rest of the class. Before he knew it class was over. Sora quickly grabbed his bag and made his way to the door. He was trying to escape from the classroom before Roxas started babbling to him again. Looking over his shoulder he noticed no one was following him. He quickly ran to the bathroom and looked around inside. He was in luck, no one was there. Sora hurriedly opened his bag and grabbed his makeup. The rest of his classes were canceled for the day because the principle decided out of the blue to have a pep rally for the chess team. How pathetic.

The door to the bathroom opened and Sora looked down in annoyance. There goes his cover up, now the whole school would know about it and taunt the living hell out of him.

"Damn… are you ok?" Came a familiar voice. It was the last voice Sora wanted to hear at the moment.

"I'm fine." Sora muttered as Roxas slowly approached him.

"What happened?" Roxas asked cringing at the many bruises that were scattered on Sora's face. Who in their right mind would do that to another human being?

"Take a wild guess." Sora muttered dryly. He grabbed his makeup and started applying some of it on his face.

"Riku?" Roxas asked thinking back to the popular jock who was beating Sora up a last Friday.

"You could say that." Sora muttered again. Yeah it had been Riku… and his parents. It was over something stupid. Riku suddenly had an English paper that was due along with his math homework that was forced upon Sora on Saturday night. Sora just couldn't seem to the paper 'just right' so they beat him up. It was as simple as that.

"Why do you let him do that?" Roxas asked before thinking. Sora scowled at him and furrowed his eyebrows in frustration.

"Why do you think I let him do that, huh? I can't fight back you idiot." Sora spat applying the makeup on his face in fury.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that. It came out wrong." Roxas said looking sadly at Sora. Sora's eyebrows softened at this. He stopped applying the make up and looked down at the shiny white sink.

"What…what do you want Roxas?" Sora asked quietly refusing to look the blond in the eye.

"I uh…nothing…" Roxas muttered grabbing his back and pulling out some hairspray. Sora smirked at this and his lips quirked in an almost formed smile.

"Hairspray?"

Roxas blushed and looked at the bottle. "My hair doesn't defy gravity." Roxas mumbled biting his lip. Sora chuckled at this.

"Mine does. It defies staying in place." Sora said taking off the beanie he was wearing. Roxas smiled at this and then his smile vanished a little. Besides the makeup, black clothes, lip rings and earrings, this boy looked almost identical to the picture in the Social Worker's office.

A voice was suddenly heard over the intercom. "All students report to Avinger Hall for the Chess Team Pep Rally immediately, we will be checking ID's. Any student that is not at the Avinger Hall in less than 10 minutes will receive detention."

Sora cursed and put his beanie back on. He had desperately wanted to avoid going to a pointless pep rally that celebrated the most boring game in the universe. Roxas sprayed his hair and threw his hairspray back into his bag. Sora was already at the exit when Roxas yelled over to him.

"Hey um…what's your name?" He asked timidly.

Sora stopped and bit his lip. Should he tell him? Should he continue to hide it? Roxas didn't know about him, he didn't know who he was. It would be ok he guessed. It's not like Roxas remembered what happened. He wouldn't remember him.

"Sora…my names Sora." Sora said not looking back as he exited the bathroom leaving Roxas with an eerie feeling he couldn't place.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora!" Kairi said flashing a big smile at the goth kid when he walked into the large hall filled with ecstatic kids. They weren't exited about the pep rally. Hell no, they were excited about having classes canceled. A dozen midterms had to be put off because of the unexpected event. Kairi however wasn't that excited about the half day; she was more excited about her date to the dance. She felt as she was a whole new person because someone finally noticed her.

"Um…hey." Sora said a little surprised at how excited she was. Then it hit him; he had to warn Kairi about Riku. By the looks of it he guessed that she wouldn't take it easy.

"Oh my god, guess what?!" She babbled, forgetting that Sora was indeed not one of her girlfriend and no less even considered a friend. But she didn't care, she had to tell someone.

"Riku asked you to the dance?" Sora asked not wanting to act like he didn't know squat.

"How did you know?" 

"Um, I overheard it." Sora mumbled. "Sorry."

"Oh…that's ok! Isn't it awesome?!" The red head said jumping up and down in frenzy.

"Um…look Kairi, I don't think…"

"You don't think what?" Kairi asked cutting the boy off worriedly.

"Don't go with Riku, Kairi. It's not a good idea."

"…Why?" Kairi asked frowning. Why did he care if she went out with Riku or not? Everyone was always trying to keep her from being happy. Why did he have to barge in and ruin her mood? What was he jealous? Or did he just want to ruin other people's fun. Kairi was slowly getting angry. Who was he to give her advice?

"Because he's not good…he doesn't have the best…um…uh, intentions." Sora stated trying not to give away the point that Kairi was being played.

"Best intentions? Ok maybe he has his issues but I don't see what's wrong with him." Kairi was seriously trying to stay calm right now but the conversation was pissing her off.

Sora frowned at this. What's wrong with him? Didn't she see that he beat up on other teens all the time, mainly him? Didn't she see that he used girls and then threw them away like a piece of trash? Why couldn't she see past his looks?

"Kairi I just…I don't think it's wise, you'll get your feelings hurt in the end."

"You know what? You're just jealous and bitchy. Just cause you can't get a date doesn't mean you get the right to ruin mine. You're just trying to ruin my life and make me into a freak like you!" Kairi yelled glaring at the brunette in front of her.

Sora raised his eyebrow and frowned. Where did she get all this from? What had he said that might have made her think that he was trying to ruin her life? He was trying to help, not hurt. Sora couldn't help but feel a slight twinge of pain from her words. He had thought her different, maybe he was wrong.

"Never mind Kairi, go on your date and be sure to have fun." Sora mumbled turning away from the angry red head. Kairi watched him go and her shoulders slumped. She hadn't meant to say those things. She was just so angry with him for some reason. She thought about apologizing but decided against it. Those words shouldn't have hurt him, she thought. He's a goth, he's used to comments like that. Kairi turned and found a seat on the portable bleachers. She put Sora completely out of her mind as Riku came and sat next to her. There was no way she would ever listen to Sora's words of wisdom.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Roxas leaned back against the wall of Avinger Hall near the exit door. His mind was racing with thoughts of the chocolate haired boy. Sora. It was so familiar. Too familiar. He itched to know where he had heard that name before. Where he knew this boy from.

Roxas watched Sora and Kairi from afar. She was yelling at him for something. The image brought a sudden sense of déjà vu.

"_I hate you!" Roxas screamed throwing a rock at a small chocolate haired boy. "I'm sworry." The smaller one said shielding his face. "Roxas, don't you throw another rock at Sora!" A strong voice yelled from across the yard. Roxas stopped and shoved the brunette to the ground and ran inside the huge mansion doors._

Roxas shuddered involuntarily. What was that? A memory maybe? Roxas thought back to the little scene that played in his head. He remembered it. It was a long time ago; he didn't know where he was or when he met the boy who was across the room from him. But he knew him. He knew him from before. Roxas was trying to remember more when a voice called to him. It was Namine who was beckoning for him to join her. Roxas grabbed his bag and forced Sora from his mind. He'd think about it later.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

People are deceitful. I know that for a fact because I'm a person. We lie and cheat, kill and take. We are greedy and often angry. We are thirsty for something more than the world could ever produce. I can't say that I haven't had my days where I go mad. When I'm so thirsty for my lost family that I'm driven to cut every vein and artery in my body. People would say it's understandable but it's not. Until they hear the circumstances they will never know. I'm a killer who deserves to be put behind bars for what I did. I deserve to live the messed up life I'm living. No they'd never understand. I want them but I don't want them. They say I can't make up my mind. But no, I just live in the middle.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: okay so I feel like crap right now 'cause I think I caught a cold, so I'm not gonna do individual review responses. Sorry..I'm just really out of it. hands all future reviewers a cookie Please leave a review if you care.

Peace.

Thank you all for the reviews:

**KHgirl23**

**shadowtailmon**

**aquired.minds **

**key46812**

**Malcolm Yuy**

**Creativedreamer48**

**darkwing13**

**HyperShadowGirl11228**

♥ Love you guys. ♥


	16. Is the World Wearing A Mask? Part One

A/N: This chapter is pretty long, sorry. Had to get a lot in. This is a two part chapter just to let you know. I was going to add the other half but it would just be too long. Hope you enjoy!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sometimes I wonder why good people are forgotten. Why bad people are always remembered for their crimes and good people forgotten for their deeds. Why do people follow mean people? Why do friendly people get cast aside for those who don't give a damn about you? Why can't the world see past your face and your clothes, your background and family? Why is it that people who haven't hurt anyone are the ones that are hurt? I don't understand why the world works this way. I don't understand why people think this way. I only know that its wrong. I only know that no matter how hard you may try they're never going to like you. So when you turn to their side and spread hatred, anger, lies…why do they still not want you? Why do people hate what's good and love what's bad? Tell me, why are we so afraid to do what's right?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kairi looked in the mirror and smiled at her reflection. She looked amazing. Yesterday night she had purchased her long sought after dress: a creamy peach tube top dress that flowed to the ground. Kairi thought it brought out her natural red hair perfectly.

"I think it's beautiful Kairi." Kairi's mother said looking her over. "It's the perfect fit." Kairi smiled at this. She and her mother had searched long and hard for this dress. They had gone from store to store, city to city looking for Kairi's first dance dress. It was well worth the effort.

"Thanks Mom." Kairi said smiling at her mother. It almost felt like old times when her mother was always there for her. It felt like it was just Kairi and her Mom; not her Mom her stepfamily and then Kairi.

Tonight was the big day. Kairi was almost faint with excitement. Her first date and to the captain of the football team no less. Kairi was ecstatic. She was dying to call someone up about her happiness and gab for hours but then realized there was no one to call. Selphie hadn't talked to her for about two weeks and Sora was most definitely not an option. She thought about calling a few of her other friends, but she didn't think that they'd care.

"Oh I can't wait!" Kairi screamed throwing herself on the bed. This day was going to be the best day ever.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hello?"

"Hey Selphie, this is Riku."

"OHMYGOD!!!"

"Uh yeah…do you have a moment?"

"Oh my gosh, of course I do, why wouldn't I? That'd be stupid."

"Right. Anyway, so I don't have a date for the prom." Riku said over the phone. He had absolutely no shame in lying.

"REALLY?! Oh my gosh!"

"Yeah…couldn't find anyone I liked personally."

"That's so sad!"

"I know it is isn't it? But anyway, you know I'm the captain of the football team right?"

"Of course I do! I go to all your games!"

"Well the captain of the football team can't go to the prom without a date."

"Yes?!" Selphie asked hopefully.

"So…I needed a cheerleader because I need to maintain my reputation so…wanna go with me?"

"OHMYGOSH!!!" Selphie screamed into the phone. "OfcourseI'llmeetyouthere!."

"Ok good, oh and show up about ten minutes early will ya?"

"Of course, I'll see you there!"

"Good. Later."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Roxas entered his Dad's restaurant quietly and waved to the blonde girl across the room. Namine smiled and waved back shyly walking over to Roxas.

"Hey, what's up?" Namine asked as she approached the blonde.

"Nothin, just dead bored." Roxas answered leaning against the front desk. "How are you today?"

"I'm good, bored, but good." Namine said brightly, picking up a few scattered pamphlets and setting them back in place.

"So…what are you doing tonight?" Roxas asked curiously. The blonde girl was a mystery to him, she never talked about her family life and never seemed like she did anything fun.

"Oh I don't know, probably just stay at home." Namine answered glancing over at the blond. He was cute; there was no doubt about it. Namine had tried for the longest of times to avoid being attracted to the teen standing next to her but to all avail she failed. She didn't understand why he was so nice to her. By all means she didn't deserve even a hint of kindness. But he was different; he talked to her at school, always said hello and even left his friends to walk her to class. It was a nice feeling she had to admit, but she didn't deserve it. She didn't deserve it at all.

"Aren't you going to the dance?"

"No…I don't have a date." Namine said blushing. "Are you going?" She asked trying to get the subject off of her misfortune.

"Naw…I'm not into dances. I can't dance so what's the point." Roxas said chuckling. He had been asked by several girls to the dance (which he considered to be a little strange) and he denied all of them. He wasn't looking for a relationship right now. He was too focused in trying to figure out who he was. But with all that aside he did have his eyes on a certain blond girl.

Namine laughed and wiped her hands on her apron. "Yeah…I've been to so many dances its not really fun anymore."

"Was it corny or something?" Roxas asked looking over at the other teen.

"No…you could say I ruined them for myself." Namine stated smiling sadly. "But we don't need to discuss that."

Roxas frowned but changed the subject. "When do you get off work?"

Namine sighed and looked at her watch. 12:30 it read. "I get off at 7:00."

Roxas nodded and then looked her in the eye. "Hey so um, wanna go see a movie or something later?"

Namine's face brightened and she nodded. "Sure…that'd be nice."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora where the heck are you?!"

"Riku would you keep it down, I'm at work." Sora spat into his cell phone. This was just what he needed; Riku getting him fired.

"Yeah I could care less. Look, you have to drive me to the dance tonight."

"…Riku I'm busy."

"Who the hell cares?!"

Sora sighed. He knew better than to argue with someone who always got his way. Damn brat. "Fine. Whatever. What time?"

"7:00. Oh and call the damn heater repair man. This place is freezing."

"Riku…"

"It is! It says it's gonna snow for god's sakes. Whatever happened to 'tropical islands'?" Riku yelled turning off his cellphone.

Sora sighed and flipped his cellphone closed. Riku was such a pathetic pain in the ass. Sora admitted to having had dreams of brutally murdering Riku. His first means of assault? Carving out his dirty tongue with a spork.

"Sora?"

"Yes sir?" Sora asked glancing over at his boss. "Um, there's a lady at the desk who wants to see you."

Sora walked over to the front of the bookstore looking for the woman. When he saw who it was he cursed under his breath. Cecilia Vanderval.

"What do you want?" He asked rudely, looking the woman over. She looked nervous for some reason.

"Sora I need to talk to you."

"Can't you see that I'm working?"

"It's important. It has to do with Roxas."

Sora stopped unpacking the box on the counter and closed his eyes. "What about him?"

"He knows…about you."

"….How did he find out?" Sora asked quietly.

"Look why don't we go outside, it'll be better to talk out there where we're alone." Cecilia said nodding towards the door. Sora bit his lip and followed the woman outside. He didn't feel the need to fight her right now. For all he knew his life was almost over.

"Sora…he came to my office a week ago. He wanted to see his birth certificate."

"How…why…why did he go to you?" Sora asked confused. Why would Roxas go to a Foster Care agency of all places? Why didn't he just go to the hospital where he had been born and asked for it?

"I don't know."

"So…he knows…he knows who I am?"

"He knows about you but he doesn't know who you are." Cecilia said searching Sora's eyes for a hint of emotion. "He's going to find out about you sooner or later, Sora. I could tell from the minute he walked in the door that he was determined to find out about everything."

"So then what am I supposed to do? Just walk up and to him and tell him I'm his long lost brother?"

Cecilia sighed and rubbed her hands together in the brisk weather. "His parents found the copy of the birth certificate I gave him. They contacted me. They said that usually moved when Roxas figured out about his past but now they want him to know the truth. They said they can't keep his past hidden forever and that it's about time you two meet."

"I'm not going to talk to him if that's what you're suggesting."

"Sora…it would be good for the both of you."

"Good for the both of us? What are you kidding?" Sora spat glaring at the woman.

"Sora he needs to know."

"So this is good thing, huh? You really think that he wants to find out that his parents were shot in the head. That _he_ was shot in the head. And that I…heh, that his own brother-"

"Stop it Sora, it wasn't your fault."

"Whatever. I'm not talking to him."

"Sora why not, what are you so scared of?"

"I'm not scared of anything Cecilia. He's my brother and even though I hadn't seen him for ten years until now…I still love him. I don't want him to know about anything…remember anything…that'll cause him heartache." Sora said barely above a whisper.

"Sora…he should know…he shouldn't live a lie."

Sora bit his lip and sighed. "What do you want me to do, Cecilia."

"Give me your cell number…I'll give it to him," Cecilia said pulling out a piece of paper. "I'll tell him that you don't have to tell your name or where you live. The call will just give him some…reassurance."

Sora closed his eyes, took a deep breath and opened them again. "Fine." He muttered grabbing the pen and paper from the woman and scribbling down his phone number. With that he turned around and walked back inside the bookstore without even a good bye.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kairi looked herself over in the mirror and smiled. She was finally ready to go. Her mother was going to drive her to the school in a few minutes and Kairi took this time to make sure that everything was perfect.

"Kairi, come on, time to go!" Her mother yelled from downstairs. Kairi squealed and ran down the stairs and straight out to the car. Her mother followed soon after with one of her step children in tow. Kairi frowned at this but didn't say anything about it. Nothing was going to ruin her mood tonight.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Why are you being so quiet?" Riku asked looking over at Sora. Sora didn't look at him and kept his eyes on the road.

"Cause I want to."

Riku huffed and played absentmindedly with his cell phone. He couldn't wait to get this bet over and done with. "Wait till you see her face…" He said chuckling.

Sora glanced over at Riku but didn't say anything. What was the use?

"I'm gonna totally ruin her life at this school…haha, and she's only a freshman."

Sora bit his lip as they came to a red light. "What did she ever do to you, Riku."

Riku looked over at Sora and scowled. "She came to this school."

"That's your best answer?"

"…Look I don't care about her or her feelings. I care about winning this bet and making me, myself and I look good."

"Don't you ever think about anyone else, Riku."

Riku scowled and sent Sora a death glare. "If you weren't driving I'd beat the living shit out of you."

Sora laughed at this as he turned into the school parking lot. "You really think it would be any different from your usual beatings?" Sora asked stopping the car and looking over at Riku questionable. Riku glared at him for a second then and stepped out of the car and made his way up the school entrance angrily.

"Enjoy your dance love." Sora yelled out to him making the silver headed boy cringe in hatred. This day wasn't turning out to be a good one for sure.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"RIKU!" A shrill voice was heard coming from the other end of the dance room. Riku cringed and turned to face the hyper brunette in all her neon green glory.

"Hey Selphie." Riku said looking the brunette over. She actually looked good for a change. Her usual oddly styled hair was tied up in a fancy bun with a few curled locks framing her face.

"Oh my god you look awesome!" Selphie yelled looking the silver haired boy over. Riku smirked at this. There was no doubt about it; he was a god.

"Yeah, aren't I always." Riku said looking around the room in search for a certain red head. As he was searching his aqua eyes connected with Wakka's laughing brown ones. Riku smirked and gave Wakka an evil smile. Wakka gave a thumbs up in response and headed off in the direction of a random cheerleader.

"Ugh I can't stand her!" Riku heard Selphie mutter. He looked over in her direction and smirked. There she was. The short red head had just entered the large gym and was looking around nervously. Riku looked over at Wakka who had also taken note of the shy teen. Riku then nodded his head for Wakka to come over. It was time for some fun.

"Gather the guys Wakka and be quick, she's gonna find me in a second." Riku said quietly. As Wakka started searching out their large collection of friends Riku grabbed Selphie's arm and pulled her close to him. Selphie blushed and leaned into Riku's touch.

"Wow, I never imagined that you'd like me like this." Selphie said dreamily. Riku nearly gagged but held it back and put on a false smile.

"Guess you imagined wrong." Riku said noticing the red headed girl edging her way around the crowd of teenagers. Riku looked over and noticed that Wakka had gathered his friends and a couple of cheerleaders. They were all standing near the punch table awaiting the 'show'.

Kairi's heart raced as she spotted Riku's silver hair amongst the heads of her fellow students. She felt so nervous and excited at the same time. What if that wasn't Riku? What if she made a fool out of herself? What if she forgot how to dance? Wait a minute; she didn't know how to dance period! Of all the worst possible scenarios Kairi had imagined in the last few seconds, nothing could compare to the sheer horror that blared in her face upon reaching the silver haired teenager.

Kairi bit her lip at the sight. Selphie was in the arms of her beloved Riku. The blood drained from her face for a brief second and then flooded back in when she saw the smirk on Riku's face. She had been played hands down.

"What are you doing staring, freak." Selphie yelled glaring at Kairi angrily.

"I…I…what are you doing in the arms of my date?" Kairi asked quietly unfortunately noticing that half the school was watching.

"Your date? Ex-c-use me but Riku asked me out earlier today." Selphie said matter of factly. The crowd started buzzing with interest as their little 'show' started.

"W-what…Riku asked me out l-last week." Kairi said barely above a whisper. She couldn't believe this was happening to her. Why did people always do this to her? Kairi's mind flashed back to the incident earlier that week. Sora had warned her. He had told her it wasn't a good idea and she didn't listen to him. _"I'm such a fool."_

"Well obviously he had second thoughts. Who would date you?" Selphie said smirking. "You're just a shy stupid little nerd."

"T-then…why'd he ask me out? There m-must be something good about me." Kairi said biting her lips. She was trying so hard to believe that Riku liked her. That Selphie's words weren't true and that she wasn't about to become the most laughed at person at school. Kairi knew from experience though that hopes and wishes never came true.

"Because Kairi, it was a bet…heh, and looks like I won guys." Riku said laughingly as his friends fished out their wallets and handed him the owed money. Kairi's mouth fell open slightly and tears came rushing to her face as she saw the green paper money being laid in the palm of Riku's hand. A bet. She was just asked out because of a bet. Kairi felt as if her heart was broken. Riku didn't like her for her. She was just the new kid of which he placed a bet on to get cash he didn't even need.

"W-why…?" Kairi asked backing away from the laughing crowd.

"Because Kairi…you were just so worth it." Riku said laughingly, slapping hands with Wakka. Selphie smirked at Kairi and showed her the hand. In her books she had won. It didn't matter that Riku was probably going to dump her after the dance too, but for right now, seeing Kairi so defeated was a dream come true. But for a second Selphie had to question herself. What did Kairi ever do that was so wrong for her to be treated like this? What had she said that was so mean to make her so mad at her? Deep down Selphie knew this wasn't right…but would she change any of it? Not for the life of it.

Kairi let the tears fall as she raced down the hallway tripping over her high heels and sometimes crashing into lockers. She had to get out. She had to get away from this horrid place. As Kairi neared the entrance she stopped and took a breath. Tears were running down her face in a fury completely ruining the make-up that she and her mother had spent hours applying.

Kairi bit her lip and pulled out her cell-phone as she stepped outside. It was best to call her mom to come get her.

"Kairi?" A quiet voice said coming from against one of the giant pillars. Kairi looked up quickly and after recognizing the voice, shut her cell phone and wiped at her tears.

"I'm so sorry Sora." She said quietly as a fresh batch of tears came rolling down her face to her displeasure.

"For what?" Sora said approaching her. She looked like hell. Sora bit his lip as a rush of pure guilt filled his being. He should have told her about the whole thing. He had only been thinking of himself.

"I-I…I should've l-listened to you…I'm so stupid…" Kairi sputtered between sobs. Sora looked at her sadly. It was genuine. He felt awful for the shy red-head who like him looked as if she had no one to confide to. He understood her reasons for not listening to him, why she got angry and yelled. It was beyond understandable.

"Don't freak Kairi it's all right…your not stupid, you just made a mistake is all." Sora said quietly, touching her arm as a comforting gesture.

Kairi looked up at Sora but couldn't see his eyes because they were hidden by the stripped black and white fedora. "I like your hat." She said simply, smiling awkwardly. She was trying desperately not to think about the incident and believed that changing the subject would be for the best.

Sora raised his eyebrows at this comment. He hadn't expected that one. "Umm, thanks."

Kairi nodded and pulled out her cell-phone. "I…I'm just gonna call my mom…tell her to pick me up." Kairi said wiping her eyes with a tissue she had pulled from her purse.

Sora watched as Kairi dialed the number and waited for her mom to pick up. He bit his lip as he heard the buzzing of her phone and suddenly contemplated an idea. Maybe he could make this time a bit easier for her? Maybe he could try and fix what had happened, at least on his part that is. Maybe the guilt he felt would disappear if he did something kind.

"Hey Kairi…you um…do you want to…um…you want to go have some coffee or something?" Sora asked quietly. Kairi's head shot up. Had she just heard him right? Sora the 'freaky' goth kid who hated everyone and everything had just asked her to coffee. Kairi gulped nervously, this was odd indeed.

"S-sure…that'd be nice." She whispered shutting off the cell-phone. "That'd be awesome." Kairi said a bit louder this time.

The world was a strange place. The people who dwelled on it were even stranger. How people acted was a thing Kairi would never understand. Why one minute they're cold and another they're warm. Kairi wouldn't think about this right now, however she had made up her mind about one thing. She'd live in the neutral from now on. Never to trust, and never doubt.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I wish I didn't have to feign that I'm not broken. That no matter how many times you shoot me down I can stand to take another bullet. Why don't you understand that I'm not strong? That I'm only a kid who wants to be loved like any other. If you had one wish what would it be? Would I be involved in your wish? Would you think about me? IF not, why am I here? Why do you waist your time telling me I am useless. Don't you think I already know? Don't you know now that I believe your words? Can't you see that you've broken me and that glue isn't going to put me back together? I'm missing a piece you see. It's my heart. You can glue me back together but you can't replace what's missing. That's a known fact.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ok, usually I would do review responses but the site is messing me up (I can't view my reviews so I don't really know who reviewed and what they said) Please bear with me, I promise to post Review responses to all of your reviews on the next half of this chapter. Thanks a lot! Love you guys! (And thank you for wishing me well about being sick, the cold's about gone…thank god!)

Till next time.

Peace.


	17. Is the World Wearing A Mask? Part Two

A/N: Holy…this was one hard chapter to write. It nearly made me want to stop writing the story all together…and believe me I was seriously considering it. Thankfully, I gathered enough strength to pull through for you guys. Please enjoy my efforts at a good chapter.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sometime I wake up in the middle of the night and wonder where the sun went. I wonder why it hides from me when I need it most. When the moon smiles its evil smirk and laughs at my wounds. Why does this happen to me? Why do the shadows creep and take away everything I've tried to keep. Why do the push me down and pull? I don't know why. I don't know why I have these nightmares. People grabbing, pushing, touching. Why did they let this happen to me? Why didn't they stop them? Why don't they understand how it feels to have someone always watching you? They can't see him but I do. I see his face, his smile, and his evil hands. I see him over my shoulder with his gun placed against the back of my head. I hear a bang and wake up from my nightmare. Only it's not a nightmare, it's a wish that just won't come true.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I can't believe we got kicked out." Namine said giggling. Roxas and Namine had departed from the restaurant at exactly 7:00. At first their conversation was awkward and uncomfortable, but upon arriving at the movie theatre it felt as if they had been friends for years. In the midst of their conversation, Roxas had accidentally purchased the wrong tickets and they sadly found themselves watching a chick flick with an overplayed plot. Roxas and Namine grew bored as soon as the opening credits started playing and decided to start talking about anything and everything under the sun. For the most part they kept their voices low, but during an extremely 'tragic' point in the movie, Roxas and Namine started to loudly make off handed jokes about how sappy it was. Unfortunately, a soccer mom who was sitting behind them grew furious and called an attendant who promptly kicked them out of the movie theatre.

"Stupid soccer mamma's always have to have their way." Roxas said thinking back to the incident. That woman needed serious help starting with her mustached lip.

Namine's voice interrupted his thoughts about the hideous woman. "Haha, that's an interesting tone to hear from a mama's boy."

"What? Heck no…" Roxas denied blushing. "I'm not that sappy."

"Roxas, you call your mother 'Mommy'." Namine said giggling. She had overheard Roxas talking on his cell-phone with his mother a few days ago. She remembered the exact words: "But Mommy…I don't want to." Roxas's voice had been so whiney and childish that it was actually kind of cute.

"I do not!...well, maybe sometimes…" Roxas muttered his face turning beet red. "What can I say…I love my mom." Roxas's thoughts drifted slowly as he said that. She wasn't his real mom and he wasn't her real son. The ever familiar question quickly came to mind: Who is my real mom?

Namine sighed as she heard those words. She loved her mom too, but her mom didn't love her. Namine could barely remember a time when her mother wasn't drunk or switching from one person to another. She had only one strong memory of her and her mother being together in peace, it was when she was six and they were alone in a field of daisy's in their back yard. Namine's mother had made her a crown of daisies and swung her around the field. Namine had laughed and told her she wanted to be just like her when she grew up; now Namine wanted to be anything but like her.

Shortly after that Namine's dad left her and mother for another woman who lived on one of the bigger islands. Namine's mother had been heartbroken and had started gambling excessively hoping to make some money for her daughter and herself. Yet, never earned a cent and one day Namine found herself alone at a foster care agency waiting for her mom to be able to make some sort of living to support her.

"Namine…are you ok?" Roxas asked looking over at the blond girl. Namine looked up and gave a sad smile.

"Yeah, I'm fine." She lied looking back down at the ground. "You have any siblings Roxas?" She asked hoping to change the subject. Roxas bit his lip and sighed softly.

"Yeah…but I don't know where he is…" Roxas said as they crossed a street.

"You don't know each other?"

"You could say that…we might've known each other…ugh, I don't know." Roxas muttered. "I'm adopted." Roxas took a breath and looked over at the blonde who didn't look surprised or confused. A calm face was what he saw. "Do you…do you promise not to tell anyone? I just…I don't want anything to get out at school."

"I won't tell. You have my word." Namine said looking him in the eye to show him she meant it.

Roxas sighed. It felt good to tell someone about his predicament. He wouldn't dare tell his parents and nobody else seemed trustworthy enough. "I want to find him…or her… he or she is my twin…and I want to know why we were separated…"

"Did you perhaps find out the Adoption agency or Foster care agency that had your records…?" Namine asked curiously.

Roxas nodded. "Lakeshire Foster Care Network…that's the place." Namine gasped and bit her lip causing Roxas to look over at her questioningly. "Something wrong?"

"No um…well um…I was there for awhile. It's a long story but…my mom couldn't keep me for a few months when I was six." Namine said sadly. Roxas noted this and didn't push. This was the first piece of information Roxas had gathered from Namine's past.

"Looks like we've both had our share of issues…" Roxas said quietly as they neared his father's restaurant. Namine nodded thinking back to her stay there. She remembered being scared and wanting her mother so badly. The social workers had been friendly and caring, but they were not her mother. A faint memory came to mind that made Namine smile. She had made a friend there, a friend that until now she had forgotten about. He was a small chocolate haired boy with a sad smile. The social workers had been uneasy around him for some reason. They had whispered behind his back and often ignored him when he spoke to them.

/Flashback/

"_Hi, my name's Namine." A small blonde girl said approaching the smaller spiky haired boy who was silently drawing a picture on a small piece of paper. _

"_I'm –…" He replied barely above a whisper. _

"_Watcha drawing?" Namine asked sitting beside the boy who inched away from her when she did. _

"_My bwother." Was his answer. The boy did not lift his head but merely placed the picture in the blond girls lap._

"_He's cute…where is he?" Namine asked looking over the impressive drawing of a blue eyed boy with blond hair._

"_He's gone 'way…"_

/Flashback over/

What was his name? Namine thought hard but couldn't place it. She'd have to think about it later for it was starting to puzzle her greatly.

"Hey Namine…it's late, are you sure you're going to be ok getting home? I mean I could drive you if you want." Roxas said as he stopped in front of the door of his father's restaurant.

Namine was about to except his offer but suddenly thought of what her mother would say or do if she came home riding in the car of boy her mother didn't know. To put it simply, all hell would break loose. "Um, no I'll be ok." She said smiling. "I had a great time tonight, thanks for um…taking me out…" She said blushing at the words she had chosen. It wasn't a date…was it?

"Your welcome." Roxas said with a smile. "Be careful ok?"

"I will. Don't worry. Goodnight."

"'night"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Kairi, seriously, how much chocolate do you have in that thing?" Sora asked peering over at Kairi's large ice coffee that looked as if it had at least a dozen different kinds of fudgy goodness inside of it.

"I dunno, enough to knock me out probably." Kairi answered laughingly. "How much cinnamon do you have in yours?"

Sora glanced at his own coffee that currently had at least fifteen sticks of cinnamon sticking out of it with more to come. "Hehe, enough to get me high…" He answered stirring his coffee with one of the sticks.

Kairi giggled and dumped another packet of sugar into her coffee. "How do I look?" She asked putting on a model's face and then giggling once again.

"As good as you can look wearing a black fedora with a peach dress." Sora answered, his lips turning up slightly at the red head that currently had his fedora on her head.

"I'm gonna seriously have to go and buy one of these, only mine will be pink….oooh, with purple polka dots."

"Charming." Sora said dryly. What a sight that would be. Not a good one indeed.

"Hey, can you draw me?" Kairi asked perkily looking at Sora's sketchbook that was sitting next to his coffee.

Sora quirked an eyebrow at this. He couldn't exactly understand the sudden mood swing of Kairi's. He'd have imagined her to be extremely sad and depressed the entire time. At first she had, but then when Sora said he'd pay for her…something changed. Maybe it was the feeling of being treated out. Or maybe it was the chocolate. He didn't really know.

"Sure." Sora pulled out a pen and opened his sketchbook. He glanced up at Kairi to find her nodding her head in tune to some random pop music that had just come on. Sora frowned and tried not smile at her ridiculous attempts in trying to catch a beat. "Hey, hold still for a sec." Kairi blushed and sat back in her chair. Ten minutes passed by and Sora presented his sketch.

"Wow…every sketch you draw is amazing." Kairi said looking at her mirror like image. "Can I keep it?" She asked hopefully. Sora nodded and tore out the page.

"Are you going to study art when you graduate?" Kairi asked studying the drawing.

"I don't know, depends if I have the money to." Sora mumbled looking into his mug. She had brought up an interesting question. Of course Sora would be able to go to college; money was in no way a problem. It was pressure of it all that mad him think otherwise.

"What about you…where are you going?" Sora asked looking up at the red head. Kairi blushed and frowned.

"I don't know, nothing about me will get me anywhere." Was her quiet answer. It was the first time she looked and sounded sad since being there.

"Really? Huh, from what I've heard you're really smart. You're ahead of me in your classes and I'm a year older than you."

Kairi smiled sadly and looked down at her newly manicured nails. "I…being a nerd hasn't helped me at all…I'd rather be stupid and left alone than smart and picked on."

Sora nodded understanding where she was coming from. "What Riku did…he would've done to anyone. It's not just you."

"…I just don't understand what I did wrong…I don't know what I did to make him hate me."

Sora bit his lip and pulled at one of his bracelets. "You didn't do anything…Riku's a bastard, I know that personally. He doesn't care about what others feel, all he cares about is himself. Riku had had his eyes on Namine for awhile…and well when things went downhill for her he made fun of her like he never had liked her. It's not just you Kairi." Sora finished off with a short breathe. He didn't like talking for so long; he found it pointless and a waste of time. But this was important; he didn't want Kairi to turn into a pathetic depressed being like himself.

Kairi thought back to the day Namine had turned in her cheerleading outfit. It had been the day that Selphie had suddenly turned into a snob and the day when she'd discovered Sora's disturbing artwork in his sketchbook. It seemed so far off that day, she thought sadly.

"I don't understand this school, Sora. I don't understand the people here. I don't understand the backstabbers and the jerks. Sometimes it feels like I'm never going to make any true friends." Kairi muttered quietly.

"Well…what do you look for in a friend?" Sora asked looking the depressed girl over. He really didn't understand her sudden mood changes.

"Oh I don't know…someone nice, truthful, won't stab me in the back, someone who's not afraid to be seen with me in public." Kairi said chuckling dryly. "I'm hopeless."

"No you're not…I'll tell you the truth though, it's hard to come by people like that at our school. Your first trait 'nice'…almost everybody fails that one."

Kairi sighed sadly and looked up at Sora. "Well that sucks…thanks for telling me that I'm never going to make friends…or date."

Sora frowned at her sarcastic attitude but took it as a sign of depression. "I didn't say all of them, Kairi."

"…Then where are the few that aren't jerks?"

"Maybe…maybe when you stop acting like someone you're not you'll find them."

"What do you mean by that…?" Kairi asked frowning.

"Kairi…you were trying way too hard to impress Riku. Tell me, what exactly did you see in him?"

Kairi bit her lip and thought hard about the awkward question she had just been asked. What did she like about Riku? Sure he was hot, but what else? Kairi thought through this and came up with only one clear answer. She saw nothing in Riku. Absolutely nothing.

"I…nothing…I don't see anything in Riku. I mean I think he's hot but…nothing about his personality is nice."

"Then don't feel sad about him. Forget him and move on. I'm sure there are lots of other guys out there that would kill to take his place. Don't waste your time over people who don't care. It's not worth it." Sora said, quirking his lips up into an almost smile. His cellphone went off before Kairi could give an answer and Sora promptly picked it up.

"Hello?"

"Sora where the hell are you?" The voice said over the phone. Sora sighed and pulled at one of his spiky locks.

"I'm out."

"With who?"

"…Who do you think?"

"Ugh, never mind. Get your ass over here and pick me up in thirty minutes."

"…The dance doesn't end till like…12."

"Like I care. This chick is driving me insane."

"Well that's what you get."

"Look, whatever. Just get over here in thirty. You have to, Mom and Dad are gonna be out till lord knows when."

"So stay the night at Selphie's." Sora said smirking into the phone.

"Good lord Sora please just get over here." Sora raised his eyebrow at the 'please.' _He must be really desperate. _

"Ok fine. I'll be there." Sora said shutting of his cell phone and placing it in his pocket. "Sorry about that…It was Riku. He wants me to pick him up in thirty."

Kairi frowned and grabbed her purse. She had wanted to keep talking. For the most part their conversation had been smooth and interesting and Kairi couldn't help but feel really special at the words Sora had spoken before answering his phone.

"I guess I'll call my mom." Kairi said pulling out her cell phone.

"Why would you do that? It wouldn't be right to just leave you here. I'll drop you off." Sora said grabbing his keys. Kairi couldn't help but blush madly. She really couldn't quite understand why she was feeling this way. It was just Sora.

Sora opened the door of the coffee shop, avoiding the curious stares of an elderly couple approaching the door. They had a right too. It wasn't everyday that you see a creepy goth punk with a red head in a prom dress. They were an odd sight to see.

"Sora…why are there panda's in the back seat?" Kairi asked spotting a couple of stuffed panda's sitting besides Sora messenger bag.

Sora blushed and sat down in the driver's seat before answering. "Um…yeah, I have small obsession with pandas."

"..And baby seals?" Kairi asked spotting a few of them here and there.

"Yeah, I think they're um…uh…how do you put it…"

"Cute?"

"Yeah." Sora muttered blushing. He started the car and cringed when pop music started blasting through the stereo. "Holy hell…"

Kairi giggled and started clicking some of the buttons making the music sound different. "Sweet."

"I guess."

Kairi clicked a button and suddenly felt her chair vibrating. "Dude, an in car massage!"

Sora chuckled and clicked a button once they had reached a stop light. All of the sudden the sleek black mustang started bouncing up and down. "Riku has a thing for pimped cars."

Kairi giggled and pressed another button. Looking in her rear view mirror she noticed that the wheels on the car appeared to be spinning even though they were at a stop. Sora chuckled as Kairi's eyes went wide with amazement.

"This is sweet, do you drive it all the time?" Kairi asked as Sora pushed a random button turning all of the pimpish goodies off.

"Yeah, Riku's not getting his license back for awhile. It's actually a pain in the butt 'cause now I have to drive him everywhere."

"When did you get your license?"

"A few months ago."

"Wait a second…how old are you?" Kairi asked curiously. She suddenly thought it odd that she had never asked the age of the boy.

"I just turned 16 about two weeks ago."

"Oh…so how'd you get your license so early?"

"Rich people have their ways…" Sora mumbled dryly. He'd gotten his license for the sole purpose of driving Riku's lazy butt around.

"So…how'd he get it suspended?"

"He drove his last car straight through a barber shop. Luckily no one was hurt."

"Holy crap, how'd he do that?"

"…Lets just say that when Riku and Wakka drive with rap music turned up as high as it possible can go and milkshakes in hand…well basically, they're stoned."

Kairi giggled and picked up a random seal that was on the dashboard. "What's life like for you, Sora."

Sora didn't answer immediately and Kairi started to worry if she had said something that offended him. After a few seconds however Sora took a breath and started talking. "You know…it's about as good as it can get being a foster kid."

"Oh…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring up anything that would offend you."

"Don't worry about it…it's just a question. To be honest with you, I can't wait to get the hell out of this place."

"You want to leave the whole Island?"

"More like the whole world…but that's not happening so who cares."

Kairi nodded and looked down at her hands. Sora was such a mysterious person. Every time she thought she could piece a part of his puzzling life together he broke it with his sad words.

"Is this your house?" Sora asked, slowing in front of the house with the address Kairi had given him.

"Yeah." Kairi said opening the car door and stepping out quietly. Glancing back inside the car she noticed that Sora's thirty minute time limit had long since passed.

"I'm sorry I made you late…I hope I won't get you in any trouble." Kairi said as they walked up to her door.

"It's ok, really." Sora said quietly as they approached her door. "I better go before one of your family members sees me." Sora said chuckling. "I'd probably scare the shit out of them."

Kairi giggled and watched as he started walking back to the car. "Oh, I forgot to give this back to you." Kairi called out taking off the fedora she had grown quite comfortable in.

Sora looked up and shook his head. "You can keep it. Paint it pink and put purple polka dots on it."

Kairi giggled once again. "Hey Sora?" She called softly to the boy who again stopped in his tracks.

"Yeah?" Sora asked turning back to face the girl in the pretty peach dress.

"Thanks…thanks for taking me out." Kairi said shyly.

Sora blushed and bit his lip. "No problem…" He turned to walk away but stopped again and turned around. "You look very nice tonight…it's a shame Riku was too blind to see it."

Kairi blushed a tomato red and tried to keep her lips from turning up into a big smile. "Thanks…you're…you're a good friend Sora."

Sora stiffened and looked down at the ground before looking back up to give her a small smile that was barely noticeable. However Kairi saw it and it made her heart glow.

Stepping inside her dark house she made her way up to her room quietly. Tonight had been nothing like she had dreamed it would be. Her heart ached at the humiliation she had endured at the dance. How she couldn't see it coming she didn't know. She also didn't know how someone she used to be so uneasy around had suddenly become so much more than an acquaintance. She had never been daring enough to look past the dark décor of the mysterious boy. She had been too blind by her lust for the silver haired jerk that she didn't notice the one person that hadn't stabbed her in the back since starting this school. Yes, Sora was so much more than the creepy goth kid in the back of the classroom. For tonight she had found him to be her first true friend.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sometimes as I walk down a dark and lonely road I wonder if there is any such thing as a light at the end of a tunnel. What happens if before you reach it you run out of strength Sometimes you just can't make it, you just can't see that light. You find yourself sitting in the middle of the tunnel, the light is there but you can't reach it. You can't touch it. You go crazy because you just _can't _do it. You try to stand, try so hard to make it but you collapse. The light is staring at you, it's laughing at you as you struggle to reach it. You want it so bad you can't bear it. Suddenly it goes black. The light isn't there anymore. All you see is darkness. And you're happy. You're just so happy that the light isn't there making fun of you. It isn't there to tell you that there's more to life and that you're too weak to reach it. The darkness is denial, and it's always been my best friend. If you believe there's no such thing as light, then denial will grant it and you'll be covered in everlasting darkness. Yeah, it's that simple.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review Responses!

**Black-Dax-(**For Chapter 15) Thank you: ) (For Chapter 16) Lol, me too. Thanks for reviewing! Review again!

**Malcolm Yuy-** (For chapter 15) Yeah I know I wasn't pleased with that chapter at all. My grammar was all hell that day. I'm glad you liked it though. (For Chapter 16) I'm glad you enjoyed it (and thank god there weren't so many bad grammar errors as last time…jeez, I re-read that thing and it nearly killed me) I know, Riku's going to regret that…believe me. Anyways, sure I'll check it out! I read some of the first chapter and it sounds amazing. You're a really good writer. I'm going to have to go and read the whole thing. Anyways, thanks for reviewing and review again!

**ofdarknesschaos-** Thanks for reviewing and well, I hoped you enjoyed this chapter! Review again.

**Key46812-** (For Chapter 15) Thank you! I really try to work hard and make it feel like real life, so thanks for commenting on that. Also, thanks for the encouragement. : ) (For Chapter 16) Wow I feel honored! Thanks so much for reviewing and review again!

**Divinehearts-** (For chapter 15) Thanks, and yes I feel sorry for him too. (For Chapter 16) It was pretty cute wasn't it? Thischapter made me feel really happy. They'll get together in time. In good time indeed. Thank you so much for reviewing! Please review again my friend. : )

**Nalix of the Dark Hearts-** Thanks for reviewing: ) I'm glad you liked the chapter, I appreciate it.

**HyperShadowGirl11228-** (For Chapter 15) Ah my good friend I know, sometimes I get annoyed with myself for making the story drag on…Sora does really need to tell someone but…it can't happen yet! (For Chapter 16)

**angelofsweetness-** (For Chapter 15) Lol, it's alright. I know, Kairi was pretty annoying (had to make her that way, she was too perfect for her own good) thanks for reviewing and please review again!

**aquired.minds-** Lol thank you! I'm glad you like it that much, makes me feel great. : ) Review again!

**Kupo3.0-** (For Chapter 15) I'm feeling pretty good which is awesome. Thanks. Lol, I loved the bathroom part…hairspray…yep, Roxy doesn't have it natural. (For Chapter 16) You've almost got the picture, Sora didn't shoot them though. Lol, he didn't murder his family. Fedora's are hot. Plain and simple. That's why I absolutely had to give Sora one of them. Thanks for reviewing my friend, I appreciate it. Review again!

**darkwing13-** (For Chapter 15) Yep he is, and yes…poor Sora. He has one unfortunate life. (For Chapter 16) I love that Sora was there too, at first I wasn't going to do that but…well it just seemed right you know. I absolutely adored the ending too. It was pretty cute if I must say so. Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**shadowtailmon-** Lol, I know I wasn't going to mention anything about how weird that would be, but since you left a review about it…well I had to add something. And no, I wasn't about to have Roxas and Namine there. (Way to dramatic for my tastes) Anyways, thank you for reviewing! It means a lot to me. Please review again!

**creativedreamer-** Man I love Sora too, this chapter made me love him more. : ) Lol, let 'em burn in hell. I've made them seriously annoying (It's making me hate Riku all together…jeez.) Awww, that'd be a cute video. Seriously. Lol hands cookie Enjoy: )  
Thanks for reviewing and please do review again!

**SecretWishesKeptHidden-** w00t another fav! Lol, anyway, thank you so much for reviewing and yes, I feel so sorry for Sora (abuse sucks…) and yes it appears to be getting lighter…it won't stay that way though : ( I'm such a mean author at times. Anyways, please review again!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So there we have it. My toughest and longest chapter yet. I really hope you guys liked it! Please review...it only takes ten seconds of your time. I have no idea when the next chapter will be bout just to warn you guys, it might be in a few days or a few weeks. Who knows. Please stick with me though.

Till next time.

Peace.


	18. Please Don't Belive Me, I'm not Okay

A/N: This chapter shows a different side of Sora, so don't get confused. Anyways, this story is starting to annoy me lately so I might put it on hiatus for awhile.

Warning: This chapter is violent, just to let you know. To my younger audience (those under 13) don't read it if you can't handle it. And if you do read it, don't bash me for putting in violence. I seriously do _not_ need that. This story is ultimately aimed for people ages 14 and older so don't get mad at me. Altogether this chapter is pretty dark, a big change from the last one.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

If I had one chance to tell you I'm leaving I wouldn't let you know. I send out my angel under fallen snow. Fifteen days are too long to wait. I'm going to cock my gun and put and end to this place. Tonight you'll laugh as I slit my throat. Dancing on mushrooms and killings goats. Come watch me drown it out. Tomorrow you'll be crying but tonight enjoy the show. Watch me sink through the bloody floors and all the world will say 'hush'. The voices in my head will say 'shush'. And tonight I'll listen to them.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Roxas dear, sit down, your father and I have something to discuss with you."

Roxas looked at his parents curiously and slowly sat down on the leather living room couch. His parents sat down also. Roxas noted that they looked very nervous and uncomfortable.

"Roxas, we found this in your room awhile back." Roxas's father said pulling the copy of Roxas's birth certificate out of his pocket. Roxas gulped and avoided his parent's gazes. How was he supposed to explain this? As if his mother had read his mind she replied with a simple answer.

"You don't have to explain any of this…we know your motives."

Roxas looked up at his parents and then looked back down into his hands. "I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry; you were going to find out anyway."

Roxas nodded but refused to look up at his parents. "So…who are you guys?"

Roxas's parents cringed at this and looked at each other awkwardly. "We're your parents, Roxas." Roxas's father said after a few minutes of silence.

"The birth certificate says otherwise." Roxas muttered.

"Well…before we became your parents I was your aunt." Roxas's mother said quietly.

"So…who are my real parents?"

"Roxas…they aren't alive anymore." His mother said quietly. Roxas only shrugged softly.

"I guessed that much."

"Well…" Roxas's mother started. "About your sibling…"

At this Roxas looked up at his parents waiting for whatever they were about to say.

"As you know your siblings' your twin…"

"Yeah…" Roxas said urging her on with his voice.

"Well we're not exactly sure about where he is."

"It's a he?" Roxas asked. He had guessed it was a boy from the first time he saw his birth certificate but just wanted to make sure he heard correct.

"Um yes. He's seventeen hours younger than you, about a day basically."

Roxas raised an eyebrow at this. That was a bit odd to say the least. "What's his name?"

Roxas's parents looked at each other nervously and kept quiet for a few minutes. "We can't exactly tell you his name…"

"Why?" Roxas asked getting annoyed. What was the big deal about a name?

"Because he doesn't want you to know his name."

"So he knows about me?"

"Um, well yes. We have his cell phone number; you can call him if you want."

Roxas looked up to see his mother handing him a piece of paper. He took it from her and noticed a cell phone number that looked as if it had been hurriedly written across the paper.

"You're not to ask his name or where he lives…" His mother said quietly.

Roxas nodded and pocketed the number. He wouldn't call today. He honestly didn't know when he'd call him. For now he was glad just have a link. Roxas had plenty of questions to ask his parents but decided against it. They probably weren't going to give him answers anyway. He'd have to figure this one out himself. Starting tonight he was going to do some much needed 'research'.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora, there's someone here for you…"

"Is it my social worker? If it is, tell her to go away."

"No it's not her…it's a woman with a long braid. Brown hair. Pretty eyes."

Sora looked up quickly as his boss described the woman. It was Aeris. He knew it. Sora quickly walked to the front of the room looking for the brunette woman.

"I'm right here Sora." Aeris said softly from the corner of the bookstore. She gave him one of her gentle smiles and approached him quietly.

"Why are you here?" Sora asked giving her a hug and a small smile. She was the only person he dared give a smile too. He knew he could trust her with his life.

"I have the right to visit my god son once in awhile." Aeris said hugging him back. "Let's go for a walk, ok?"

"My boss would kill me." Sora said sadly looking over at his emotional boss.

"I'll persuade him." Aeris said already walking over to the elderly man. A few minutes later she returned smiling. "Let's go."

Sora followed the woman outside the door and shivered slightly. It was seriously getting cold around here. Though most of the islanders were complaining about the oppressive weather, Sora actually liked it. It was a nice change from the usually humid weather. It especially helped his case in clothing; black was much more comfortable in the cold than in the heat.

"So, how's life been treating you Sora?"

"Ok I guess…I mean it sucks, but it's not horrible." Sora lied biting his lip.

"Really? You seemed depressed about something."

"I'm always depressed, Aeris."

"No you aren't…there's something bothering you." Aeris said stopping and looking Sora in the eye.

"Nothing's wrong Aeris. Really."

"Sora I can tell when you're lying…something is going on and you won't tell me."

"I…I don't know…I'm just…" Sora couldn't bring himself to say it. He couldn't tell her what was going on. That he couldn't protect himself from his forever angry foster family. That he couldn't be enough for them and was seen only as a charity case to make them look better. He couldn't tell her, if he did, what would happen to him?

"Just what Sora? Tell me what's going on…"

"I…" Sora's cellphone went off just at the right moment. Sora let out a breath of relief and answered it. "H-hello?"

"Sora come home now." Came the furious voice of Riku's father. Sora gulped and bit his lip nervously. Riku's father never, _ever_, called him on his cellphone. This must be really bad.

"Is something wrong?" Aeris asked looking worriedly at the boy. Sora bit his lip and shook his head no.

"I'll be there soon." He said closing his cellphone. "I…I'm sorry, I have to go."

Aeris sighed and frowned at Sora. "Sora…you know you can tell me anything right? You don't have to hide things from me."

"I know I…I'm fine really." Sora said giving her a sad smile.

"I came to visit my niece…I'm only here for one night. I'll call you later, ok?"

Sora frowned and hugged the woman tightly. "Why do you have to go…?" He mumbled into her shoulder. He couldn't help but feel extremely depressed at her departure. Aeris was the only adult in his life besides Tifa that genuinely cared about him. He hadn't seen her in months for her job as the dean of successful boarding school constantly kept her away.

Aeris sighed and ran her hands through Sora's wild chocolate locks. "I have work to do at back at the school…" Lifting his face off her shoulder she planted a kiss on his forehead. "I'll come back at the end of January, I promise." She said smiling. Sora frowned but nodded. He pulled out his keys and turned to leave.

"Sora…?"

"Yeah?" He asked quietly.

"Take care of yourself, alright?"

"Sure…" Sora mumbled walking up to the black mustang and stepping inside. Why didn't he just tell her the truth? Why did he continue to hide this?

As Sora was walking away, Aeris looked down at her hands and in the process noticed that white make-up was smeared on her blue jacket. It was near her shoulder where Sora's face had previously been. An eerie feeling came over her as she took note if this. Something was wrong and Sora was trying everything in the book to hide it.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sora continued to bash himself for not telling as he made his way back to his house. Upon reaching his destination his thoughts raced back to small conversation he had had on the phone earlier. He bit his lip and slowly approached the dark cheery wood door. Bracing himself, he slowly opened the door only to be pulled inside and slammed against the side of the wall.

Sora bit his lip and opened his eyes to meet bloodshot red ones staring straight back at him. Riku and his mother were in the kitchen watching from afar. Grabbing Sora by his hoodie, Riku's father dragged Sora and through him against the kitchen island countertop. Sora noticed that Riku looked uneasy but still held his normal smirk. His mother had an evil smile on her face that only meant one thing: Sora was dead.

"So this is what I find when I walk into my house, huh?" Riku's father yelled throwing a pack of cigarettes in Sora's face. Sora gaped at them and then slowly turned to face Riku. Riku smirked at him but the hint of fear was still there. Sora gulped and looked at the packet. They were indeed not his. Last night as he was driving home from picking up Riku from the dance he had noticed the little white package Riku was holding. Riku had said it was from Wakka and he was going to try it out. His dad had probably found them before he could use them though.

/Flashback/

"_Riku what the heck is that?" Sora asked looking at the white box Riku was currently examing._

"_What do you think?" Riku answer smirking. "Cigs."_

"…_Riku, get rid of them." Sora said quietly glancing over at the silver haired boy._

"_Who the hell are you to tell me what to do?"_

"_Riku your dad is going to find out."_

"_So? I'll blame it on you." Riku said smirking and pulling out a lighter. "Wakka got 'em both from his cousin, said there's this awesome sensation or whatever. I'm just testing."_

"_Riku…"_

"_Oh quit whinin' I'll hide em."_

/End flashback/

Obviously Riku hadn't hidden them well enough.

"So now you're smoking, hmm?" The man said throwing a punch at Sora's face. Sora bit his lip and closed his eyes, his hand flying to his cheek.

"They…they aren't mine." He said softly holding back a gasp as the man threw another punch in Sora's stomach.

"They aren't mine." The man mimicked angrily. He grabbed Sora's hoodie and roughly threw him against the refrigerator door. "Then whose are they, huh?" The man yelled throwing punch after punch in Sora's stomach. Sora gasped and held back the urge to cough up the blood that he was holding back. He cried out softly when he heard the sickening crack of one of his ribs being broken. The man laughed as he heard the crack and pulled back.

"Tell me they're yours Sora. Tell me now!" The man screamed into the boys face. Sora cringed and tried to form a word but none would come.

"You little shit tell me now!" The man yelled again. Sora tried to respond but once again the words wouldn't come out. He felt as he was about to pass out from all the pain. The man growled angrily and punched Sora in the stomach again. He started kicking and slapping and hitting until he was too tired to do any more.

"Tell me now. You did it didn't you?!" He yelled, gasping for breathe.

Sora closed his and bit his lip till it bled. "…Riku…" He said quietly trying to stay conscious as his world started going dizzy.

Riku watched from his corner as the brunette was taking the beating he himself deserved. He felt guilty and wrong but he wouldn't dare stop his father. He had no idea what his father would do if he knew it had been him who had gotten the cigarettes.

Riku's father grew enraged at the answer. His son didn't do it. Riku would never smoke cigarettes. Riku was perfect. Grabbing a pot of boiling water that Riku's mother had put on for dinner, the man threw it at the barely conscious teen hitting the boys left arm square on.

Sora couldn't help the scream that tore through his throat as the burning water touched his already hurting skin. It suddenly felt as if his skin was melting off his body. Riku gasped from across the room and ran towards his father. This was too much.

"Dad stop you're gonna kill him!" He said grabbing it his father's arms. Riku's mother walked up to her husband, completely ignoring the sobbing boy on the floor, and started trying to calm him down. Telling him he had a right to be angry and that maybe he just needed a little fresh air. Riku however didn't give a damn about his father's feelings at the moment. He was panic stricken and filled with deep guilt. Stepping away from his father he turned to the brunette who was holding his left arm to his chest.

"Sora…?" He asked quietly, touching the younger teens shoulder in gentle matter that even Riku himself couldn't believe he had just expressed. Sora glanced at the offensive hand on his shoulder and slapped it away. Standing up shakily, Sora turned and ran from the kitchen. It was only adrenaline that helped him make it up to his room where he passed out on his bed.

A few minutes later Sora's voicemail started beeping on his side table. When no one picked up a message came over the line.

"Sora, I'm just calling to see how you are." Came Aeris's pretty voice. "Just wondering where you were and if you're okay. Call me back later, alright?"

_Please don't believe me. I'm not okay. _

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Fifteen wishes and fifteen dreams. 16 roses and 16 coffins. 17 homes and 13 boys. 100 desires and an eternity of losses. I think I pulled the cover off his coffin and cried my eyes out. They ran down the drain and land in waste. I wonder what's up beyond outer space. I had one life line and fifteen chances to fall. Well luck isn't about staying alive it's about risking it all. Cut out my lungs and kill my body. Guess what, you won't here me screaming.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So…there we go another chapter. I'm like really put off with this story right now…so please don't hate me if I put it off for awhile. Maybe my mood will change, I don't know. Who knows, another chapter might be out in a few days.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review Responses!

I'm just going to say that I'm really happy about the response I got from the last chapter. I have a new record for 13 reviews for one chapter, so yay for me! (Though I should have about 32…but seeing as more than half of you never review, I don't.)

Thank you reviewers! You guys are my good friends here. :)

**Darkwing13-** Thanks for reviewing! Sorry you didn't get as much fluff as you had wished for (I don't want to speed the relationship) I'm glad you liked the chapter though! I know the hat…I thought it was cute. Glad you love the story, review again!

**SecretWishesKeptHidden-** Glad you liked it! And yes, Namine knew Sora when she was younger. I'm not really going to go too deep into that though. Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**xxxjust-a-nobodyxxx-** Lol, everyone want's to kill Riku. Believe me, he deserves it. I can't wait for when Roxas finds out about Sora being his brother too (I'm itching to start writing that chapter right now) Thanks for reviewing and review again! (And yes, Riku's parents should go to jail)

**Malcolm Yuy-** Yay fluff, I love writing fluff it makes me happy. I'm really glad you liked the chapter. : ) I seriously want to kill Riku off in this story, but then I'd have to rate it M and I don't want to do that. I thought the interaction with the couples in this chapter was pretty good, not my best, but good. Thanks for your review! I appreciate it. Please review again!

**Princesskairi3-** Yay! You added it to your favorites. Makes me so happy. : ) I'm glad you love the story! It makes writing it worth it. Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

**Aquired.minds-** I won't stop writing it, don't worry. I'm going to finish the story if it takes all I'm worth. Thanks for the encouragement and the review! Review again!

**Shana.95-** Hehe…right. This is the 17th chapter, sweetie. Fluff was completely due. Sorry if you thought it was too fluffy. If it's too fluffy for you simply don't read it.

**shadowtailmon-** Lol gives you a seal and panda Enjoy! Sora is pretty cool; I'm trying to give him a soft side with the plushies. I think it's cute. Lol that would be pretty cool. It would be awesome to see Kairi and Namine take him down. Riku's a jerk. Haha! The scissors...lol. Thanks for reviewing and review again my friend!

**protorb-** Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you like it despite all of Sora's problems (cries). Believe me, there will be another chapter kind of like 17…only that one will be a lot better (as in romantic –cough-). I'm glad that this is one of the few high school fics you like. It makes me feel really special. : ) Once again, thanks for reviewing and review again!

**Key46812-** Yay! Glad you liked it my friend. : ) I feel honored, seriously. Thanks for reviewing and please do review again!

**KHgirl23-** Thanks for reviewing! You got your update…(even though it's depressing) Please review again!

**creativedreamer-** Lol gives you another cookie More cookies for a good friend. : ) Anyways, I loved that last chapter. I love the pairings! Lol, Riku seriously needs to get killed. Brutally too. Ha! I'm glad you liked the chapter! –dances around- Thank you so much for reviewing and review again!

**Black-Dax-** Thank you so much: ) Please review again!


	19. The Simple Task Of Getting The Job Done

A/N: Ok yeah, I was so bored I had to write another chapter. I'm still considering putting the story on Hiatus, but not anytime soon. Let me tell you, this has to be one of the most boring chapters I've ever written. I was so extremely bored writing this (more bored than I had started off with). This chapter has to be boring because the next chapter won't. The next chapter will be crazy fluffy…I'm getting excited just thinking about it. Anyways, try and enjoy this one. Oh, and I'll explain the whole 'how Sora got to the hospital and how Aeris found out' thing in the next chapter, ok? Good.

Oh yeah, three cheers for 16 reviews! (-cough- however one of them was not needed)

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

If I could go back in time to the day it all happened I'd tell myself to shoot. Not at him but at me. I wish I would've ended my life right then and there. I was such a fool. I didn't see that killing him would only make my life more miserable. I didn't see that if I shot myself I'd be with my parents in heaven. That god would accept me for I was young and hopeless. I shouldn't have committed a crime that you just can't take back. I can't make it right even though they say I wasn't wrong. I wanted revenge. Plain and simple. I thought it would be good. Let me tell you, there's no such thing as sweet revenge.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kairi bit her lip anxiously and looked around the room. It was two minutes till class started and her partner wasn't there. Matter of fact, Kairi hadn't seen Sora all morning. It was extremely odd seeing as the brunette was usually five minutes early to class.

"Hehe, I can't believe you dared to show your face today." Came a nasty voice from out of nowhere. Kairi frowned and glanced over a few desks to see a taunting Selphie.

"Whatever Selphie." Kairi muttered looking at her watch. Where was Sora?

"Whatever? So you're going to act like it never happened then?" Selphie said a bit louder. She looked a bit disappointed at Kairi's nonchalant attitude.

"I'm going to get over it, ok? Enjoy Riku." Kairi answered not looking at her ex-friend. A few minutes later the final bell rang and class started. Kairi sighed and pulled out her art supplies. Whatever assignment they were assigned to do today was going to be a failing one.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Ri-ku! Listen to me!" Came a shrieky, whiney, and unbelievably annoying voice.

Riku however ignored the shrill voice and kept his head buried in his arms. It was lunch time. Usually Riku would either be joking with Wakka, flirting with cheerleaders or watching Sora get beaten to a pulp. That was just it. Sora. Riku had never felt so guilty in his life. The fact that Sora was in the hospital because of him nearly made him want to throw up. It wasn't like he cared about Sora. He honestly didn't. But something clicked inside of Riku when he saw the boiling water nearly reduce Sora's arm to the bone. It just wasn't right.

"Riku! Listen to me!" The annoying voice again rang out. Riku lifted his head up slowly to meet the eyes of his large group of friends. Selphie was sitting next to him with the look of pure aggravation in her eyes.

"Hello? Am I just invisible or something? Wait…are you thinking about that Kairi girl, cause if you are-"

"Selphie shut up." Riku spat glaring at the brunette.

"What?"

"I said shut up." Riku said louder. The table started whispering between themselves as the little argument started to escalate.

"Look, I am your girlfriend; you don't treat me like this!

"Who the hell ever said I was your boyfriend?" Riku asked. She seriously didn't believe that the bet at the dance actually made her his girlfriend, did she?

"Uh? Everyone does you idiot."

Riku looked at his friends who nodded slowly. Taking in a small breath he turned to Selphie angrily. "Well then, I'm breaking up with you."

"What?! You can't do that!"

"Oh just shut up and go away." Riku spat laying his head back into his arms.

"Whatever. You don't deserve such a beautiful woman as me." Selphie yelled her face red with embarrassment. She stood up angrily and stomped off in the direction of her art partner, Roxas.

"Yo Man, what's wrong with you?" Wakka asked after Selphie's departure.

"Nothin'" Riku muttered angrily into his arms. A few minutes later Riku felt a tap on his shoulder. Looking up he met the angry eyes of Tifa his biology teacher from last year.

"Riku, a moment please?" She asked stiffly. Riku gulped and stood up. He averted his eyes from his whispering friends and promptly followed the woman out of the cafeteria.

"Yes?" Riku asked once they were alone.

"Where's Sora, I know you know where he is so don't lie."

"Well…obviously, he's not here." Riku said trying and failing at giving one of his signature bratty smiles.

"Don't mess with me Riku. Tell me where he is."

"He's at the hospital." Riku answered quietly. "He burned his arm yesterday."

"At the hospital? For burning his arm? How'd he do that…?" Tifa asked slowly.

"My mom was boiling water for dinner…he well, tripped I guess and it spilled on his arm." Riku lied keeping a steady voice. Hopefully she'd believe him.

Tifa sighed slowly and held back cuss word. "Riku…I don't believe that Sora is that clumsy. How many times has he been to the hospital this year? Hmm, ten times at least?"

"Well it isn't my fault he was born like that." Riku said angrily. His parents would surely kill him if any of this got out.

"Whatever, I'm calling your parents tonight however. A meeting with them is due." Tifa said stomping off in the direction of the teacher's lounge. Riku let out a loud breath and ran a shaking hand through his silver locks. His parents were going to be so pissed and Sora was probably going take most of the heat.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"So…when are you going to call him?" Namine asked looking down at the phone number that Roxas had re-written in his notebook.

"I don't know. You could say I'm scared about it." Roxas answered sighing softly.

"I couldn't hurt you know. I mean he probably lives in another world. If not that a different island."

"Yeah but what if he doesn't. I mean…I don't know. I wanted to meet him at first but now I don't know."

"You should do what's best for you. Don't rush it."

"Yeah…thanks." Roxas said quietly giving her a small smile. The blond girl blushed and was about to speak up again when an angry Selphie slammed herself down in a chair next to Roxas.

"Seriously! People these days!" She huffed stuffing a piece of gum in her mouth. Roxas groaned inwardly and avoided looking at the Selphie. Maybe if he pretended she wasn't there she'd just go away. Namine on the other hand had an angry look on her face and was busy staring the brunette down.

"You got a problem with me?" Selphie asked the blond angrily. "Because you seriously don't want to mess with me right now."

"Go away, you're not welcome here." Namine said quietly trying to keep her cool. Selphie's cheerleading outfit was staring her in the face and it was making her furious.

"Oh really? Well I'm a cheerleader now, so I sit wherever I want. You should know that you used to be one. It's so unfortunate that you had to give up your position." Selphie said smirking at the blond. "Isn't it beautiful…me in your place? Now you're lower then…oh I don't know, dirt."

"Get out of here Selphie." Namine said through clenched teeth.

Roxas who had been quiet throughout all of this loudly cleared his throat catching both of the girl's attention. "Um look, this really isn't the time for a fight…seriously."

"Fine. Hit the road Namine, I have to discuss some things with my new boyfriend."

"Um, no. I was here first. You get out of here."

"Shut up! You can't tell me what to do. Besides, Roxas loves me more!" Selphie said throwing a piece of chewed up gum at the blond and smirking. Namine had had it. Before anyone could say anything Selphie was on the floor with the furious ex-cheerleader on top of her. Roxas's eyes grew wide at the scene. There was kicking, punching, biting, hair pulling, cursing and dead-beat pummeling.

"Get off me you bitch!" Selphie could be heard screeching from underneath the other girl.

"Shut the hell up and die you slut!" Namine yelled back pulling as hard as she could on the brunette's hair.

"Namine get off her before a teacher sees you!" Roxas said loudly pulling at the blonde girl's arm. Namine groaned and pushed herself off the girl. Sitting back down in her chair she began brushing her hair back in place. Roxas bit his lip, a bit scared of the blond girl right now.

"You frickin Bitch! You are so going to pay for that!" Selphie shrieked, grabbing her bag and running out of the cafeteria in the direction of the principle's office. After she left a heavy silence was held over the room, it was then that Namine and Roxas noticed that the whole room had been watching the little cat fight. A few seconds later laughter could be heard from across the room and before they knew it the whole cafeteria was in an uproar.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I thought you left yesterday…"

"And leave you here by yourself? Heck no." Aeris said quietly giving Sora a small smile.

Sora gave a tiny smile in return and looked down at his hands. "I hate hospitals…" He muttered quietly.

"Everyone does." Aeris said opening the blinds in the dark room. "You'll be out soon…three days maybe?"

"Yeah…I'm going to swamped when I get back to school…"

"Ugh, I forgot. You have midterms."

"Yeah…sucks."

"You know, you look really cute without all the make-up." Aeris said smirking at the bored teen.

Sora groaned and pulled at his cheeks. "I feel bare without it." He said looking at the mirror on the bedside table. He looked like crap in his opinion. Bruises lines his face making him look like a rotten plum. His eyes that usually had thick eyeliner around them were bare making his eyes look tired. His pink lips looked so weird seeing as he hadn't seen them without their black lipstick for months. Also, his eyebrows, ears and lip that usually had earrings in place were bare making him look too ordinary.

Aeris laughed quietly and smiled. "When you go back to school, don't wear black."

Sora raised his eyebrow at the woman. "You must be kidding…"

"Heck no I'm not. Wear white."

"Aeris…why in the world would I do that?"

"Because…white's your favorite color."

"So is black."

"If you like white so much why don't you wear it?"

Sora rolled his eyes and played absentmindedly with his hospital bracelet. "I don't know…"

"Exactly. Where white, at least for one day."

"Oh come on…" Sora whined hugging one of the panda's that was sitting next to him. "I'll look like a prep."

"No you won't. Come now Sora, don't be disagreeable."

"Ugh, fine. Whatever." Sora muttered pouting. "If I get beat up it's your fault."

Aeris chuckled and picked up one of the seals on the bed. "Believe me, you won't." She said softly. Sighing she stood up and placed the seal back on the bed. "The last plane going out to my destination will be leaving in about an hour."

Sora frowned and folded his arms across his chest. "I guess I'll see you in January."

"I'll still call you, Sora." Aeris said quietly hugging the boy and kissing the top of his spiky haired head. Sora nodded but didn't say anything.

"Remember you can tell me anything, okay?" Aeris said quietly looking the boy in the eyes. Sora avoided her gaze and looked back down in his hands.

"Sure." He answered softly. He wanted to tell her the truth so bad. He wanted to tell her the real reason why he was in here and stop lying to her. But he just couldn't bring himself to do it.

"Okay…I'll talk to you later tonight, alright?"

"Alright…"

As Aeris was walking down the hospital halls her head was swimming with questions and doubts. She knew deep down that this just wasn't Sora being clumsy. How in the world could you break a rib, have bruises covering the whole of your stomach and face as if you were punched repeatedly, and a 3rd degree burn to the arm. The whole thing just didn't make sense. She was determined to figure out what was going on. Even after hours of previous thinking Aeris had done on the subject she could only come to one answer and that was Sora was being abused. His attitude and the emotions he expressed all led to it. But what Aeris couldn't understand was the family Sora was with. They were perfect. They were rich and had plenty to give Sora. They couldn't possibly want to endanger him. Could they?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I wish they would understand that I don't love them. That they can get rid of me any moment. Why can't they just put me out of my misery? Why do they insist on keeping me around for their fun? I never did anything to them, yet they believe I did. I know I'm not perfect. By god I'll never be. But I know I'm not the one who's ruining lives here. I'm just a kid who needs a home. A home with a Dad and Mom and an older twin brother. I keep wishing for yesterday and I can't face tomorrow. Why won't my wishes ever come true?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review responses!

**WellThat'sUnexpected**- Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you like it (I know, that chapter was pretty disturbing) Thanks so much for reviewing and review again!

**(-.-) **- Lol, the little smilie is cute XD. Anyways, yes, Riku actually cared a bit. He's not _that _heartless. I felt so sorry about Sora too. –cries- It nearly broke my heart writing it. Thanks for reviewing though and review again!

**Divinehearts**- I know pwoor Sora…I wish he could tell Aeris too but that would ruin the story. : ) Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**29AG**- Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad it's getting good. Makes it worth writing. Please review again!

**Sand-girl201**- Yay! I'm glad you like it so much. You're one of the first to say it's the best. Thank you so much for reviewing and review again!

**Key46812**- Oooh, speechless? Yay! Glad you liked the chapter, please review again!

**Malcolm Yuy**- Lol, I won't do that again. Hehe, it'd be cool to kill him off but I don't know if I could do it. (He's my fav character and all) I was just annoyed basically when I wrote the last chapter. I was bored maybe. I think I'm just tired with writing just one story. I don't know If I'll put it on hiatus anymore, probably not. Anyways, I'm glad you liked the chapter: ) Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**xSiNx-** I'm glad it's one of your favorites! That makes me so happy. : ) Thank you for reviewing, it means a lot. Review again!

**angelofsweetness**- I seriously hated Riku's father in this chapter. Oh yeah, and his stankin' mother. They seriously need to go to jail. I tried to give Riku a small sense of compassion in this chapter. It was due. I loved the Aeris part too, she's on of my fav game characters. Anyways, enough of my rambling, thank you for reviewing! -takes cookies and Pepsi- Review again! -hands you a cookie from my large stash-

**The Second Sight Alchemist**- I know it is pretty dark. I'm glad you still like it though. Addicted is awesome. (Lol, not really, but for me…heck yeah!) Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**KHgirl23**- You got your update: ) thanks for reviewing and review again!

**Alantie Mistaniu**- I know pwoor wittle Sora…-cries- Anyways, thank you for reviewing! I'm glad you like the story and I won't be putting it on hold anytime soon. : ) Please review again!

**aquired.minds**- Thank you! I know you need some violence once in awhile. Lol, widdle babeh…cute. XD. Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**DieChan**- Hmm, nice suggestion. I'll consider that, seriously. : ) Thanks so much for reviewing. It means a lot. Please do review again!

**creativedreamer48**- Lol, yay I'm a favorite author! gives you five cookies And yes I consider you a friend, thanks ya. :) This chapter was pretty dramatic indeed. I actually almost cried writing this (and I don't cry a lot) Lol, Riku did show some compassion. But this little event ain't gonna make him change completely. Haha! I'd actually heat up a knife or something and shove down his throat…then maybe it would pierce his heart. Ha! I absolutely hate his parents. They should and must rot in hell. (-cough- I'm still trying to decide on their futures…) Anyways, I don't think I'll be putting off this story for awhile. I'm a little too into it at the moment. Anyways, I'm rambling now. Thanks for reviewing and review again! –hands you one more cookie-.

**ReviewsGalor**- Ok…yeah. I didn't ask for a categorized review. Seriously. I don't know why you felt the need to come and bash my story but it's really not appreciated. Who are you tell me that my work is mediocre? Seeing as you have no fanfics on this site you don't have the right to tell me that. I have to wonder what your work is like. I don't know how you found my story or whatever, but please keep your thoughts to yourself.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: Well, that was a pretty boring chapter as you all now know. Please note that the next chapter will be really interesting and fluffy. (More Sora and Kairi goodness.) Thanks to all my reviewers except my last one (seriously now)

♥Love you guys♥

Peace


	20. Paint Me Cinderella

A/N: Hello again! This chapter should be good, it took awhile to write so I hope you like it. Remember, review big!

Oh yeah, and the Sora wearing the white thing…believe me, it won't stay that way. It's just for this chapter. (Though he will start wearing less make-up and jewelry) Anyway, on to the story!

Disclaimer: I do not own Cinderella or Beauty and The Beast...now that I think about it, I don't own Kingdom Hearts. Just keeping it safe here.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I wish they could look above who I am and see who I want to be. Who I'm trying to be. I wish they wouldn't base who I am on my past. I can't change my past, it's not possible. But I can change my future. That's what matters. Because whatever's in the past stays in the past. The future is unpredictable. It's that simple.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Five days had passed since Kairi had last seen Sora and she could honestly say she was depressed. Part of it was because Sora was her art partner and they had been given their midterm project three days ago. Tomorrow was the due date and Kairi hadn't even started the project.

The other reason of which she was depressed was the mere fact that she missed the goth boy. He was the only person who seemed to really understand her. Sure Kairi had a couple of girl friends around the school, but the relationships were school based. Whenever they talked it was just about boys or who was wearing what. They weren't really friends.

Kairi glanced around at the empty art classroom. Math had let out early so class would start in around ten minutes. Pulling out her sketchbook Kairi started doodling a random object. She had recently found it easier to think why she doodled. It was like a habit now. Kairi didn't look up as she heard the class start filing in. She didn't look up when she heard Selphie angrily talking about her to Roxas. She didn't look up when the class suddenly grew quiet. And she didn't look up when she heard someone sit down next to her.

"I heard that the midterm is due tomorrow…I'm sorry if I ruined any of your grades." A soft voice said quietly. Kairi jerked her head up at the voice and held back a gasp. It was Sora. Yes, but why in the world did he look so…so…so hot?!

The first thing Kairi noticed about the brunette was the color Kairi never imagined him to wear. White. Dressed like an almost normal person, Sora was wearing a white hoodie with black skulls littering the whole of it. Baggy dark denim jeans, a white beanie and black converses finished off the simple but hot look. The second thing Kairi noted was the lack of jewelry and make up. The little crown bracelet/necklace and eyeliner was the only decoration.

"Whoa…um, wow." Kairi stuttered out looking him over.

Sora chuckled, pulled out his notebook and started writing some things down. "…So, how are you?" He asked not looking over at the girl who was still gaping at him along with a dozen other female artists.

"I-I'm good…how, how about you?" Kairi stuttered out glancing back at her doodles. Kairi gasped as she noticed what she had been drawing and slapped her hand over the paper. It was Sora's little crown. It wasn't such a big deal, but for her it was.

"I'm ok…" Sora started. "Just a little banged up." It was then that Kairi noticed that the left sleeve of Sora's hoodie was pulled up exposing the bandages covering the whole of his left arm.

"Holy- What happened to you?" Kairi asked her eyes widening at the bandages.

"Spilled some hot water over my arm." Sora lied.

"Jeeze, is that why you were missing?"

"Yeah…" Sora said quietly. "Yeah, that's why."

Kairi frowned and looked towards the front of the classroom where Selphie was busy glaring at her. Why couldn't she just give this up? It wasn't worth it.

"So, what's the assignment?" Sora asked glancing over at the red head.

"Oh um, yes. Well…It's kind of hard to explain."

"Okay…" Sora said waiting for her to continue.

"We have to paint ourselves."

"That's simple enough." Sora said picking up a sketch he was working on.

"Um, not really. You see those canvases over there?" Kairi said pointing to a few canvases leaning on the wall. They were almost as tall as herself! "Yeah, well we have to paint ourselves on that using all of the space. And believe me, that'll be the easy part. We have to paint ourselves in the place of our favorite childhood book or TV characters."

"…crap." Sora mumbled looking at the canvases and imagining the excessive work that had to be put into them.

"Plus we have to use seven different colored paints and use five different techniques we were taught in lecture last week."

"…And this is due tomorrow…"

"Yeah…"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I think I'm going to call him tomorrow, the end of the week you know." Roxas said twirling a fry in his ketchup.

"Cool, hopefully it won't be too tough." Namine said grabbing one of his fries and popping it into her mouth. Roxas rolled his eyes and moved his fries out of her reach playfully.

"So…what happened? You went to the principles office and all." Roxas said thinking back to the crazy event that happened a few days ago. It was only today that Namine was called into the principles office. It probably wasn't a big deal.

"Oh that, yeah I got detention till break…but seeing as break will be here the day after tomorrow, it's no big deal."

"Sweet, you picked the right time to pick a fight."

"That chick totally deserved it. She was getting on my last nerve."

"She is a bit annoying…" Roxas said agreeing with the girl. "I don't know how I'm going to survive my midterm in art. I think we're doomed."

Namine giggled and stole another fry. "I heard it was something crazy…childhood book characters?"

"Yeah…it looks like crap. Selphie demanded on being Bell from Beauty and The Beast…guess who ended up being the beast?" Roxas said rolling his eyes. Namine giggled and poked his cheek.

"Don't worry, you're adorable to me." She said before thinking.

Roxas blushed and gave her one of his cute smiles. "Hehe…thanks." He said pulling at one of his golden locks.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"So…how exactly are we going to get this thing done?" Kairi asked Sora as the bell signaling the end of the school day rang.

"Um…" Sora said thinking it over. The project was going to take forever for sure. "Well I can't have you over my house. The whole Riku thing you know…" Sora said trying to brainstorm ideas. He absolutely couldn't have Kairi over his house. Riku would kill him.

"That's okay; we can work on it at my house. I already have the canvas there and my family is out for the night. Their visiting my step-dad's family."

Sora sighed a breath of relief and pulled out his keys. "Then I'll see you later, I have to drop Riku off first."

Kairi nodded and headed off in the direction of the buses.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sora kept his eyes on the road and didn't dare look over at Riku. He knew that if he did he'd probably lose it. There were no words that described the immense hatred Sora had towards Riku and his family right now. He was so furious he wanted to skin them alive.

"Wakka and they guys are coming over tonight so you have to leave." Riku said quietly interrupting Sora's thoughts. Sora only scowled and kept his eyes on the road ahead of him. "Mom and Dad are going out tonight and won't be home till tomorrow afternoon so you should be okay." The silver head boy finished.

"Whatever." Sora muttered holding back a whimper when he turned the steering wheel with his left arm. His arm still hurt like hell. Sora thought back to the event that happened about five days ago. Riku was the one who demanded he go to a hospital. He wouldn't have gone if it hadn't been for him. Most people would say that Sora was lucky, but they didn't know the circumstances. Sora had no idea how Aeris found out about his unfortunate trip to the hospital, she just always seemed to know.

"Look, you can stop acting so depressed now!" Riku spat slamming his fist against the window and whimpering at the impact.

"Just shut the heck up Riku." Sora said quietly, rage burning in his heart.

"Who the hell says you get to tell me what to do?" Riku said smirking. Sora glanced over at him and sucked in some air.

"If you don't shut up Riku I'm going to drive this car straight into that upcoming tree."

Riku folded his arms against his chest and snickered. "I'd like to see you try."

Sora raised his eyebrow and quickly turned the steering wheel till they had twisted off the side of the road and landed in a ditch. Smirking, he pushed the gas petal and before Riku knew it they where headed straight towards the tree.

"Oh my god! Sora stop!" Riku shrieked grabbing at Sora's arm. Sora chuckled evilly and only pressed his foot flat against the gas petal. Riku shrieked even louder as they quickly approached the tree dead on. Right before they were to hit tree, however, Sora pushed the emergency break.

"Hehe, suicide attempt number nine." Sora said as he backed out of the ditch. Riku only held a hand to his heart and kept silent for the rest of the ride.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hi, come on in." Kairi said opening the door wider for the chocolate haired boy to enter.

Sora walked in and took in his surroundings. It was an average suburban house with the tropical island feel. It also felt lived in, unlike Riku's house. As beautiful as Riku's house was, it always felt cold and creepy.

"We might as well get started right away; it's going to take awhile." Kairi said leading him towards an empty room in the back of the house. "This room is used for projects." She said opening the door to reveal a large room with the white canvas sitting in the middle. All of the needed paints were lined up beside it.

Sora nodded and knelt down on the floor followed by Kairi. "So…what exactly did you have in mind for this?"

"You know I'm not really sure…" Kairi said sitting Indian style.

"Okay, me neither. Do you have a favorite character…?"

"Yeah, do you?"

"Nope." Sora lied. He'd never tell anyone what animated character he admired when he was younger. It was way too embarrassing.

"Okay, then I guess I'll pick."

"Okay then."

"Cinderella." Kairi stated picking up a paint brush and stirring it in the white paint.

"The heck?" Sora muttered not liking the idea of frilly princesses.

"She was my favorite, and seeing as you don't have one, that's what we're doing." Kairi said starting to draw a small border around the canvas. Her word was law in this situation.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Neither Kairi nor Sora could explain how they went from quietly painting a picture to throwing popcorn at each other while jumping on mini trampolines. Maybe it was the fact that they had spent too much time near the paint, or it was the fact that they had just eaten about five pounds of chocolate each. But, it was probably due to the fact that it was 12 AM in the morning and the painting was only half way done.

"Sora you're going to make me fall!" Kairi shrieked giggling like a lunatic. Kairi and Sora were wearing a rope that tied the two together. A circle of trampolines were set up in the middle of the living room of which they were jumping to and fro, trying not to fall in the gaps. Popcorn was added to this crazy game for no better reason than to eat it or throw it at the other person. Kairi was using the popcorn as punishment for when Sora jumped too fast and made the red head fall in one of the gaps.

"Yeah really." Sora said loudly, skipping a trampoline and making Kairi fall onto his back knocking him down in the process.

Kairi punched him in shoulder and shrieked when the trampoline they had landed on collapsed to the floor.

"I swear we're high." Sora said rolling Kairi off of him while trying his best not to giggle like a little girl. It was a hopeless effort.

"Heck yeah, I can't see straight." Kairi said giggling crazily.

"That's 'cause you have my glasses on, stupid." Sora said sitting up and pulling at his hair. He rolled his eyes when he felt numerous balls of popcorn that had landed there.

"I don't think we're ever going to finish this project." He said pulling the popcorn pieces out of his wild spiky hair. Kairi giggled and pulled a few pieces of popcorn out of her own hair.

"This place is a wreck." She said pulling some sticky party spray string off of her arm. They had gone wild with that stuff about an hour ago. Kairi was decked in the stuff from the face down and Sora's hair had looked like a piece of cotton candy when she had gotten him from above. Playing hide and seek with spray string made the game all the more fun.

"Okay, we seriously need to finish this project." Sora said standing up. Without his glasses though, he didn't see one of the trampolines and promptly tripped over it. The room was silent for a moment before both of the teenagers burst out laughing.

"Sora I think we're dead, I don't see this project getting finished." Kairi said between giggles.

Sora laughed and stood up. "Oh my gosh…I need sleep." He muttered, taking the glasses that Kairi held out to him.

"Come on then, we need to finish." Kairi said walking back into the room that smelled of paint.

As they settled down to their painting Kairi couldn't help but keep glancing at her art partner. He looked so cute with the popcorn and remnants of spray string in his hair. Added to his cuteness was the fact that he looked about to pass out.

Kairi had never expected Sora to be so much fun to hang out with. She found it troubling that it took so long for him to grow comfortable in situations and open up. She had to wonder what made him that way; what made him so distant towards others.

"Hey Sora?" Kairi said quietly.

"Yeah?" Sora said looking up at her tiredly.

"You look cute." She stated, blushing in spite of herself. Kairi thought it odd that she had just said that out loud. She was usually way to shy to say things like that, especially to any boy. Yet right now, she didn't feel nervous. It almost felt right.

Sora blushed and ducked his head. "Well that's a first….thanks." He said quietly. Kairi smiled and returned to her part of the painting. It was beautiful painting indeed. Sora had sketched the entire thing before hand, and now they were copying his sketch. Sora was in charge of the outlines and shadow color, and Kairi applied the basic paint colors. She believed it was the only thing she was good at.

The entire outline was finished and now all that was left to do was finish adding the color. It seemed like it was almost done, but it wasn't.

"So…what are you going to do for break?" Sora asked looking over at Kairi.

"I don't know really…probably just stay home." Kairi said thinking about the long break that was coming up. She was going to be so bored for she had no one to talk to.

"Aren't you going to hang out with any friends…?" Sora asked thinking her answer a little unusual. Usually people had tons of plans for winter break. Christmas would be here before they knew it.

"To be honest, I don't really have any." Kairi said quietly. "I've always been shy and I ruin a lot of friendships. Selphie's an example of that."

"Oh…I'm sorry." Sora said genuinely.

Kairi smiled softly and dipped her brush into the light blue paint. "That's ok, because you're my friend."

Sora blushed and picked up the red paint and stared at it for a moment. "I can't say that I'm a very good one." He stated.

"I don't care about what people act like, look like or what they do. It all depends on the heart. And you…you have a good one." Kairi said shyly.

Sora felt his heart glow a little bit at her words. It had been a long time since someone other than Aeris had said something kind like that. As much as he tried to push it away, Sora felt a new kind of affection towards the red head. He didn't want to admit it but it felt a bit like a crush. It was the same kind of feeling he had felt for a little blond girl from his childhood.

"So do you." He said quietly, almost as shy as Kairi was. Kairi blushed and returned to her work. They were silent for the rest of the night as both were preoccupied with their own thoughts.

At 3 AM a finished painting was left drying in the empty huge room. Kairi's smile was big as she was swept round and round again in her sparkling blue dress. Her hair was tied up in a pretty bun and glass slippers were on her feet. Holding her in his arms was Sora, her prince. A small smile grazed his lips as he spun her round and round. Behind them was crowd of people who only held smiles on their faces. No scorn and no hate. It was almost perfect.

In the living room popcorn and spray string littered the floor. The TV was down low playing a sappy romance movie. A pot of burned chocolate sat on the stove slowly growing hard and on the couch lay two teenagers. The red head had her head on the brunettes shoulder, a smile grazed her lips. The brunette had his arm around the red heads waist and smaller smile grazed his lips.

It wasn't supposed to be this way for they simply fell asleep. They weren't together, and when the sun broke the sky it would be awkward and wrong. But the sun hadn't woken up yet and the moon would shine away.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Someday I'll find that reason to keep on living. To keep holding on when I'm hanging by a finger. Someday I'll find the reason for why I'm here. Why I was made and where I'm going. Someday. For now I'll take it in steps. I'll find that spark that'll get me through these tough times. Actually, I think I already found it.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: Well…that was a tough one. It took me awhile to write this thing, but I enjoyed it. So as you see, romance is coming into the picture (-cough- on the 20th chapter) I know this story is moving pretty slow, but it's getting there. Next chapter will be a big one, no doubt. It'll be interesting, not romantic though. :( Anyways, hope you all enjoyed this fluffy chappy.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review responses! (15 for this chapter, that's awesome!!)

**Princesskairi3**- Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad that it's one of your favorites. : ) I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter and I hope you enjoy the new one. : ) Review again!

**Malcolm Yuy**- I'm glad you thought it wasn't that boring. I thought I was only going to get about five reviews for that chapter. But I was wrong. : ) Lol, I know. I'm really started to hate Selphie in this fic. I wanted her to get beat up so I just put that little scene in there for no real reason at all. Hmm, I don't think I said they used to be best friends (Maybe I did, I guess I need someone to point were I wrote that) If you thought it was Riku in the poem like chapter, it was actually someone else. I know Roxas and the phone number….yes, that'll be interesting for sure. I'm glad you like the story enough to review every chapter. It really means a lot too me. : ) I'll be sure to start reviewing your story too. Anyways, I think I'm rambling now. Thanks for reviewing and review again: )

**DieChan**- Yay! I'm glad you like it. To be honest with you, I don't really like the Sora/Kairi pairing. So it's weird that I went and started writing a story about them, but it turned out good so that's great. Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**aquired.minds-** I hope you enjoyed the fluff for this new chapter! I tried to give a good amount of it seeing as it's the 20th chapter and they still aren't together. Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**Sand-girl201**- I know, Riku still needs to get beaten up. And yes, Sora wearing white. He won't stay that way, he'll go back to black. Don't worry. : ) I'm glad you look forward to this story, you shouldn't have to wait more than three days to get an update, I like updating fast. : ) Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

**(0.o) -** Lol, I just love your little smilies. They're so cute. I'm glad you liked this chapter! And yes, Selphie totally deserved that. The little was getting on my nerves. And yes, Riku should feel guilty. The little brat. Anyway, thank you so much for reviewing and review again!

**WellThat'sUnexpected**- Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you like it so much. That's awesome. : ) Review again!

**xxjust-a-nobodyxx-** I know, I made Aeris a little naïve about that part for a reason. Yep. I say discrimination too, it happens too much in the real world. Anyway, I'm glad you liked it and thanks for reviewing. Please review again!

**Alantie Mistaniu**- I know, I felt so sorry for Sora. Hospitals are hell. : ( I had to make Aeris there or else I wouldn't have written that part. I wouldn't want him to be alone. : ( I hope you liked the fluff in this chapter, and yes I'm very happy you reviewed again. :) Please review yet again! XD

**shadowtailmon**- Lol, he'd probably get scared of all of your fangirls. XD Hope you like this new chapter and thanks for reviewing. Review again!

**Zim'sGirl56**- I'm glad you like it! Yay –dances around- Lol, anything but the little Gir…and the doom song no less –crings- Hope you liked the update and thank you for reviewing! Please review again!

**key46812**- I can't wait either, it'll be interesting when he calls him for sure. : ) I actually don't know what I'm going to make Aeirs do yet. I'll have to think on that. Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**KHgirl23**- I know she is. Thanks for leaving a review, it means a lot. : ) Please review again!

**Black-Dax**- Thank you: ) And yes, I will ignore those people. They're just trying to ruin my fun. Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**angelofsweetness- **Lol, I loved that fight. It was totally needed. Hehe, sorry about making you hate characters you like. I'm doing the same to myself. Lol, that seen would've been totally fluffy…so adorable too. Mhhhmm. I'm a hopeless romantic. XD Lol, Tifa's talk with the parents. I'm going to write about that in the next chapter, don't worry. I don't think I'll put it on hiatus. It's too good right now. XD. Thanks for the encouragement. I hate annoying people who only bash. Ugh. And yeah, you just have to learn to ignore them. : ) Thanks for reviewing my friend, review again!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Well, that's it for now. Hope you enjoyed the chapter!

♥ Love you guys ♥

Peace


	21. Secrets are meant to be kept, not seen

A/N: So…here I am once again with a new chapter. This chapter is just okay in my opinion. It really only gets good at the end. Last chapter got 23 reviews! w00t! I'm so excited about that. I'm really happy that people are starting to review more. So anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. : )

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Being alone has taught me how to stand up when I'm not. I know not to trust people for I know what it means to be broken. I told myself I'd never let anyone in. I'd never let anyone see what's in my heart. I've kept plenty of promises to myself. But why, why can't I keep this one? You've drilled a hole through my armor and now you're looking in. I can't say that it doesn't scare me, and I can't say that I hate it. I broke my promise. And I think I'm alright with that.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kairi slowly opened her eyes and whimpered in anger. Something had woken her up and that something was going to pay. As her blurred vision came to focus, Kairi gasped as she discovered who her rude awakener was. It was an extremely soft spiky lock of chocolate hair. It took Kairi a few seconds to realize who the owner of the lock of hair was, and when she did she nearly fainted.

"Oh my gosh!" Kairi said a bit loudly pulling away from Sora's embrace. She blushed madly as she realized what a close position they had been in. She couldn't remember how they ended up that way. The last thing she remembered from the night before was finishing the painting.

Kairi bit her lip and looked over at Sora. He was still in a deep sleep despite Kairi's sudden movement. Kairi couldn't help but think him beyond adorable. Sora suddenly moved grabbing a pillow on the couch and hugging it to his chest. In the process, his right arm sleeve hitched up to reveal several scars, new and old. Kairi gasped and slowly reached out to touch his arm. What had happened to him?

"What are you doing…?" Sora's voice was heard through the pillow that he was now burying his face in.

Kairi pulled her hand away and blushed. "U-um…nothing. Nothing at all."

Sora sat up and pulled the pillow away. "Right…what time is it?" He said blinking his eyes. Looking around, Sora suddenly realized where he was. "Holy crap!" He yelled throwing the pillow to the side and grabbing at his arm sleeve. Sora looked over at Kairi and blushed a deep beet red. How awkward was this?

"Um yeah…" Kairi said nervously. This felt so wrong.

"Wait a sec…why am I still here?" Sora more to himself than to Kairi. "I went home…I'm sure I did."

"Obviously you didn't, and we've only been asleep for two hours." Kairi said glancing at the clock.

"Thank god…Riku would kill me if I didn't get him to school on time." Sora said standing up while pulling at his hair.

"Well I guess I might as well stay up…" Kairi said standing up as well. She then slowly picked up a few pieces of popcorn off the couch and threw them in a nearby trash bin. The sooner she got busy the less embarrassed she would be.

"We better get to cleaning." Sora said yawning softly. "This place is a wreck."

The next hour was spent in a sort of daze as Sora and Kairi vacuumed, dusted, swept, and washed. Upon finishing, they slumped tiredly back onto the comfortable couch. Sora blinked his eyes and pulled one of the pillows on the couch against his chest for the second time that morning. Kairi looked over at him and giggled quietly.

"What?" Sora said between yawns.

"Oh I don't know…" Kairi muttered, grabbing a pillow and copying Sora's actions. "You look like a little kid."

"Oh thanks." Sora said sarcastically. He pulled at one of his chocolate locks and laid his head back against the couch sighing.

"Is your hair naturally that spiky?" Kairi asked eyeing the wild spikes.

"Yeah…it's a little unusual." Sora said pulling on his beanie, causing the spikes to pool around his shoulders.

"I think it's cute. Why do you always hide it?"

"…because it's unusual." Sora answered closing his eyes to avoid looking at her. Every time she said something about him was cute he grew all fuzzy inside and blushed like love sick fool.

"What a theory." Kairi said turning off the TV that was busy playing a corny cartoon. "Well, I'm glad we finished the painting."

"Heh, yeah, even though it took all night."

"It was worth it, we won't fail this one. I'm sure."

"I must say, it is pretty good." Sora said quietly while playing with his crown shaped charm.

"When are you going to get a bigger chain for that?" Kairi asked looking at the shiny piece of work.

"I don't know…when I get the time I guess." Sora said looking at the little star shaped charm that was sticking out of Kairi's pants pocket. "You should get a chain or something for that." He said pointing to her charm.

"Really?" Kairi said pulling it out of her pocket. "I've never thought of it as a necklace."

"It would look nice on you." Sora said simply. He hadn't meant for his words to affect Kairi in the way that it did. When she didn't answer, he looked up to find the red-head staring off in the distance red faced with a love sick smile on her lips.

"Um…Kairi?" Sora said curiously while tapping her shoulder.

"Hmm? Oh, sorry!" Kairi said blushing a darker shade of red. "I was um, just thinking about something…"

"Right…" Sora said while smirking. "Well anyway, I've got to go before Riku wakes up."

Kairi frowned and sighed sadly. After today she wouldn't see Sora until school started up again, and that was in about three weeks. She didn't deny it; she had grown quite attached to the chocolate haired teen over night and was feeling highly depressed. "Ok then, I'll see you at school."

Sora noted a change in her emotions and bit his lip. He had seen this look before. It was around the time Selphie started changing and becoming distant.

"You want to hang out or something over break maybe?" He asked before giving the question any thought. It was better just to let it out than debate over it. Kairi's face instantly lit up and she nodded yes.

"Ok then, I'm just going to grab the painting and get out of here."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Alright class, come to the front and line up your paintings."

As Sora took the painting to the front of the room, Kairi's eyes roved over to the smirking ones of her ex-friend, Selphie. Kairi frowned and looked away sadly. What had happened to the Selphie she had known when she had first arrived at this school? Kairi thought about it and decided that it was worth a try in fixing things. She would apologize for her part in the argument; even though she didn't know what part that was.

Once all of the students were seated, the teacher took the time to slowly walk past the lined up paintings. As he took his time in studying each of them, the class also took the time to whisper and gossip about the many paintings on display. It was clear that one of them stood above the others.

"Well…obviously, some people failed this assignment." The teacher started off, looking directly at Selphie and Roxas's painting. Selphie fumed while Roxas gave her the 'I told you so' look.

"However…other's excelled at it." The teacher continued standing in front of Sora and Kairi's painting. "Who may I ask, did this one?" He said, tapping their painting. The class looked around the room in search for the owners of the beautiful painting. Kairi blushed and couldn't bring herself to say her name. She absolutely detested being put on the spot. Sora happened to glance over at her and notice this.

"We did." He said pointing to himself and Kairi.

"Well let me say, this is the best out of the whole lot." The teacher said. At this, the class started whispering once again in jealous tones. Kairi blushed embarrassedly, and Sora only waved it off and started doodling. To him it was just another painting.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Selphie, um…can I talk to you please?" Kairi said walking towards the brunette who was with her group of cheerleaders. As she approached, Kairi could here the cheerleaders whispering about 'the nerd who got dumped'. Kairi cringed but kept her head up. It hurt that people couldn't let the incident fade into the past, but she wasn't about to let it keep her down.

"Um, hell no." Selphie said giving Kairi the hand.

"Selphie, this is important, please?"

Selphie smacked her lips and looked at her cheer leading squad. "Should I?" She asked the team. The girls started whispering in a huddle as they discussed the question. Kairi could feel the sweat coming to her face at this. She felt so left out and feeble. This could be described as the situation of her life. Kairi always felt like she was on the outside looking in. Like people were always laughing and plotting behind her back to bring her down. It was a feeling that made her want to lie down and die and that's exactly what she wanted to do at the present moment.

"Fine, but you only get two minutes." Selphie said grabbing Kairi's arm and pulling her into the bathroom. Kairi immediately pushed Selphie's arm away and lifted her head to meet the eyes of her enemy.

"Look, I can't take this hate thing. It's not right. I don't want to leave for break with this hate." The red head started, wringing her hands nervously.

"Well you know what? I don't care." Selphie said turning away from her to face her reflection. Pulling a brush out of her pocket, Selphie started rapidly brushing her hair.

"Selphie I'm sorry, I don't know what I did, but I'm sorry." Kairi said quietly while worrying her lip.

"I don't want your apologies. I want you to go away."

"Selphie we used to be friends…"

"And a lame friend you were." Selphie said cruelly. "Always so scared and timid. Always wondering about that little punk Sora and making me feel bad. And then you got mad when I became a cheerleader and started making new friends."

"Selphie…" Kairi said, about to apologize. Then she stopped when she noticed that all that Selphie had just said wasn't her fault. She wasn't about to apologize for something she didn't do. "I'm not sorry for that."

"Excuse me?" Selphie said facing her. She had expected Kairi to beg for forgiveness of which she was planning to reluctantly grant.

"I said I'm not sorry." Kairi said firmly. "I'm not sorry being scared and timid, that's who I am. I'm not sorry for wondering about Sora, I was curious and I felt bad. You should've felt bad too. And I'm not sorry I got mad when you dumped me for your new cheerleading friends." She finished strongly.

"Well then I guess I can't forgive you if you're not sorry." Selphie said facing the mirror angrily. "You're too much of a bitch to accept the fact that you were all wrong."

Kairi quirked a grin and walked towards the door. "I guess I am." She said stepping out of the bathroom. Selphie wasn't worth her time. She now knew that that relationship wasn't worth saving. It was time to preserve some that were.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora, I've scheduled a meeting with your foster parents this evening." Tifa said quietly. "I wasn't able to catch you yesterday to tell you."

Sora sighed and pulled at one of his bracelets. "Okay…" He answered barely above a whisper. This wasn't going to be good. Riku's father was probably going to do worse damage than a burned arm and a broken rib.

"Are you alright with that…?" Tifa asked him.

"Um…I guess." Sora said quickly as the first few students entered the room.

"Okay, I'll see you later then." Tifa said walking back to the front of the room.

"You look depressed about something." Kairi said, walking over and sitting next to him.

"Eh, I'm fine." Sora muttered running his tongue over one of his lip rings. Gone was the pretty boy dressed in white. Sora was back to his usual dark self, yet he decided to leave out a few components of his goth image. He was again wearing dark denim jeans and the lipstick and heavy eyeliner were missing.

"I saw you with Selphie." Sora said quickly changing the subject. "What was that all about?"

"Oh…well I was trying to make things right." Kairi said smiling a bit. "It didn't work."

"Okay…then why are you smiling?"

"Oh I don't know. I got it off my chest, mainly."

"Well that's good." Sora said giving her a small smile. "Sorting things out is always the best idea…good job."

Kairi blushed and looked at her hands. "Thanks…"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A rush of students could be heard scrambling to get out into the crisp December air the minute the last bell rang. It was officially break time which meant they could do whatever they pleased.

"Roxas, stop fretting over this. It's just a phone call, okay?" Namine said looking into Roxas's worried eyes.

"Maybe I just shouldn't call him…I should just leave it alone." Roxas said quietly looking at the piece of paper in his hand.

The two blondes had just exited their classes and were heading towards their lockers which were halfway across the school.

"No. You shouldn't. This is important Roxas."

"I know I'm just…it's just…ugh, what am I going to say?"

"You'll talk; you don't have to 'say' anything."

"What do you mean by that?" Roxas asked questionably.

"You don't need to explain anything Roxas. Obviously your twin knows more about you than you know about him. Just talk to him, ask him about your past."

"…I don't know if he'll tell me. No one is telling me anything."

"Well you'll never know if you don't call."

Roxas sighed and looked down at the piece of paper. The number seemed to be laughing at him cruelly. Roxas didn't know what would happen when he called that number. Once he called he couldn't take it back.

"You're right…I'll call him."

"Now. Call him now." Namine said as they approached their lockers.

"Why now?" Roxas asked searching her eyes.

"Because once you get home you'll have doubts and you'll never do it. Don't even think, just dial the number."

Meanwhile, Sora and Kairi were busy talking farther down the hall.

"God I'm glad we passed that assignment." Kairi said pulling out her school books from her locker. "Now I can rest easy knowing I have a B- in the class."

"You're doing pretty well in the class. You should have an A by the end of the year." Sora said pulling out his keys and then grabbing his messenger bag.

Kairi blushed and licked her lips. "It's all owed to you."

This time Sora blushed. "I don't like taking credit…"

Kairi was about to say something to his answer when Sora's cell phone started ringing.

Roxas bit his lip as he heard the buzzing on the other line. He wringed his free hand in his shirt and studied the goth boy from across the hall. He kept his eyes locked on the boy to keep from hanging up on the phone. He had to make this call. He had to know the truth. But he didn't expect to see it with his own eyes.

"Hello?" Sora said into the phone. He didn't recognize the number on the caller ID and when he realized it his heart started beating abnormally fast. An eerie feeling came over Sora as he suddenly felt like he was being watched from behind. Turning around his eyes locked with his shocked brother's. Sora's eyes widened as it suddenly felt like it was only him and Roxas in the school. The place suddenly felt cold and dead as if no one had ventured into the building for years. Before he could stop it, the f-word slipped from Sora's lips in a timid whisper for he now knew. It was no longer a secret.

Roxas felt his phone slip from his fingers as he slowly recognized the voice on the other line. It wasn't supposed to be this way. He was supposed to be living on another Island, another world even. He wasn't supposed to be standing right across from him. He wasn't supposed to know his name. He wasn't supposed to see him. He wasn't supposed to know who he was. It was just a phone call. A simple phone call. So why did he know so much without saying one word?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Secrets are something I'll never truly understand. The motives for having them. Why we are so scared about letting them show. Everyone has secrets. But I swear I have too many. I don't know why I'm scared about letting them show. My appearance will only stay the same. A freak. So why am I so worried about a hide that can't be saved. Why do I protect what isn't worth protecting. I'll never know. Keeping secrets helps me feel better. All I can say is that it's a strong venom. A poison. Yeah, that's what it is.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Ok…about the review responses. I'm really wiped out right now; I'm trying to continue updating the story and get ready for school at the same time. (I start kind of early) So hopefully you guys will understand for this chapter. I promise I'll do review responses on the next.

Anyway, I'd like to thank the following people for reviewing:

**Alantie Mistaniu**

**Aquired.minds**

**xxjust-a-nobodyxx**

**29AG**

**Malcolm Yuy**

**Angelofsweetness**

**protorb**

**WellThat'sUnexpected**

**key46812**

**shadowtailmon**

**The Second Sight Alchemist**

**Isler**

**Kupo 3.0**

**KeiraLoveKH**

**Black-Dax**

**KHgirl23**

**Shika'sSqueezeToy**

**kyla-is-da-name**

**creativedreamer48**

**darkwing13**

**Divinehearts**

**shana.rose.**

So, until next time.

Peace


	22. Sora's Past

A/N: So yeah…this might be the last update for a little bit. School starts in a week. Background info here, just to let you know. Hope you all enjoy.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The sun was setting as a young couple and their two young sons made their way down the beautiful hill leading away from the park they had previously been at. The couple had their arms locked and lovingly looked at their sons who were racing each other down the hill. They were twins. Perfect five year old, about to be six, twins.

"Boys, don't run so fast, you'll fall." The mother said gently but firm.

"But Mamma!" The blond haired twin whined looking over at his brother who was equally upset.

"You don't want to fall like your friend, Stephen, did the other day. He needed stitches, remember?"

The boys fell quiet. They loved running and playing like most normal children did, but when it came to pain...well lets just say they tried to stay far away from ever getting themselves injured. The boys slowed to a walk, but didn't remove the pouts on their faces.

"That's my boys." The father said quietly, taking the hand of the brunette twin. The mother took the hand of the blond and smiled.

"Tomorrow is your birthday, boys. Aren't you excited?"

"Oh yeah! I wan' a weely big puppy!" The brunette twin yelled. The small boy, unlike his twin was a bit slower in the learning process and definitely wasn't any good at pronunciation.

"I want a horse, and an airplane." The blond said quietly. He was much quieter than his brother and didn't like to show his excitement as much. Even though they were twins, the blond held it over the head of his brother that he was indeed 17 hours older than him. Noticeably, their birth was not an easy one and had left their mother forever weakened. However, the mother made no note of this weakness. She would have easily given up both her legs and arms just to have her sons.

"Hehe. Now boys, you know we can't get you any animals." The father said good-naturedly. Of course his sons could have the animals of their choice. They were millionaires kids anyway, what was the harm?

"Whys nots?" The younger twin asked, about to break down in tears. He wanted a puppy. Badly.

"Yeah, why not, daddy?

"Well...we don't have enough room..." The father said, pulling out his keys as they reached their mansion's gates. He had let the house staff take the weekend off so opening the gates meant opening it manually.

"Yeahs we does! We gots lot of grasses in the back!" The younger twin whined.

"Well, we'll see now, won't we boys?" The mother said quickly, she never liked seeing her sons upset. "Come now, inside before you catch a cold. It's almost December."

"Diswember! Thats Chris-mas month!"

"It's December, little brother, and Christmas is not pronounced Chris-mas." The older twin said quietly, feeling smart. Very smart, indeed.

"I knows, I messes up...you is smarter than me anyways." The younger mumbled, looking at his feet as he took off his shoes once inside the house.

"That's not true, honey, both of you are equally smart." The mother said, smiling at her son.

The young boy was about to say something when he was interrupted with the sound that would forever change his life. A gunshot.

A piercing scream ripped through the house, and the young boy heard a body crumple to the ground.

"James!" The woman screamed, running in the direction of gunshot. More shots were heard as she ran up the winding stairs in search of her husband. The young blond twin followed, as he was always by his mother's side.

The young brunette stood still, the air felt thick, and the house appeared to be growing dark. He heard it all. The shots. The screams of his mother. The cries of his beloved brother. That single gun shot had completely shattered his young heart.

He suddenly broke out of it. He had to do something. He had to see if they were just pretending. If they were doing this as a joke on him.

He ran. He ran upstairs searching, tears running down his face.

"Mamma! Mamma wheres are yous?!" He screamed bumping into walls, tripping, falling in despair.

The sound of heavy boots where heard. The boy stopped. They weren't his 'fathers' footsteps. Nor his mother's and most definitely not his brother's. He knew who they belonged too. They were his birth father's footsteps. He still remembered the first time he heard them.

"Well well, I was wondering where the other one was." The man said. His face was hidden, his hands were gloved, his bodly fully covered. Yet, the boy knew who he was.

"...wh-where's my mammas?" He asked the figure.

"You heard honey, she's gone. Bullet went clean through her head. Kinda cool, ain't it?" He whispered, smiling sadistically under his mask.

"N-no...she not is she? You is playing...right? You is kidding...right?" He said quietly, tears falling down his small face.

"Why would I joke about a thing like that. She's dead kiddo. Your 'daddy' and your brother too. How do you like it now? Bein' all alone, with nobody who wants you?"

"No...Mamma?!" He yelled, begging his mother to come for him, to tell him this was all a lie. To tell him he just had a bad dream. To wash it all away.

"Mamma, help me! Daddy!" He yelled to thin air. He ran. He searched. And he found.

They were there, all three of them lying on the floor of the master bedroom. Only one heart was beating. And it was his own. They were gone.

"Mamma!" The boy yelled running to her side, taking note of a gun lying next to his father. He didn't know at the moment, but it was father's gun. The gun his father always carried with him to protect his family and himself. But, how could weapons save a life?

"Wake ups Mamma! Wake ups...you is just sleeping. You is sleeping, right? Just sweeping...just weeping..." He whispered.

There was no answer.

"Wake ups! Please! Don't leave me, don't go. Wake up Mamma!" The boy screamed shaking his dead mother.

"Daddy...wake ups! Please, wake ups! Don't leave me too! Brother, wake ups...wake ups. Please! I won't bother you no mores, I pwomise...please?!"

"There gone, kiddo. Face it. Now kid, your coming with me. I'm your only family, your my son, you belong with me." The man smiled sadistically. He'd keep the kid, get all of the legal crap worked out and get the massive fortune the child now had. Millions. Oh yes, he had finally did it. Gotten that fortune that he so longed to have. His damned girlfriend had had good luck for too long now; it had finally taken a turn for the worse. She was dead. Happy, happy day.

Sora looked up slowly, he was loosing it. His mother was gone. His father gone. His brother. The only life he knew. And he couldn't bear it. He just couldn't. Only one thought ran through the small boys head at the moment: he'll pay. He slowly grabbed the gun by his father and stood up, hiding it behind his back. With a wicked, twisted, and painful smile he pulled the cold trigger. His birth father who looked away for the quickest second never saw it coming.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"They were shot, three of them."

"Are they gone?"

"Two, almost three. One has a pulse but won't last long."

"What about the boy?"

"There was a camera in the corner of the room...he shot the murderer."

"Oh my god...is he...in any legal trouble?"

"No...he is five, he went mad from grief...the judge won't press. He'll need psychological therapy though..."

"Any relatives?"

"No, this man, the murderer, was all he had. He was the boy's birth father. Wanted a fortune. The kid has no one..."

"So...its foster care then?"

"Sadly, yes."

"What about the money, his fortune...?"

"He'll inherit it when he turns 18."

"Okay...I'm going to file the report and contact social services. What is the boy's name again?"

"Sora. Sora Donavan.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So there it is. As much as I hate breaking promises, I have to break this one. Can't do review responses once again. Because of the large amounts of people reviewing, it's becoming a sort of um…problem? I received 28 the last chapter, that's a bit too much to respond to.

Just know that I love you guys and I'll try to update as soon as possible. And I will get back to the review responses, I'm just really busy right now. Laters!

Peace.


	23. A Definite Possibility

A/N: Hello again! Yes I'm not dead…thank god. A new chapter is here. Nothing much goes on in this chapter but a long discussion. Hopefully you'll like it.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I never thought I'd see you again. We were both young with only six years in this world. I was your best friend and you were mine. Fate is such a cruel thing sometimes. Ten years past and you come out of the blue. I wish you were someone I never knew. But deny it I won't ever do. Something about love doesn't make you turn away. If I did I'd find out the hard way. Come follow me and I'll make it alright. You'll know who you are by the end of the night.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora? Sora are you okay?" Said boy snapped out of his daydream and looked over at his red haired friend.

"Look um, I'll see you later." Sora muttered stepping away from Kairi and grabbing his bag from his locker.

"Sora…really, are you okay?" Kairi said looking over in the direction Sora had previously been staring in. She noticed her ex-enemy Namine and the blonde kid named Roxas staring right back at her.

"I don't want to discuss it." Sora muttered making a hand signal in Roxas's direction.

"Okay…I guess I'll see you later then." Kairi mumbled grabbing her bag from her locker. She watched curiously as Roxas approached Sora, and felt a spike of envy when she saw them walk off in the other direction. Feeling rejected, Kairi started walking towards the entrance of the school only to be stopped by finger being tapped on her shoulder. Kairi turned and gulped. It was Namine. Though Namine hadn't said anything to her for weeks, Kairi was still scared of her.

"Um…hi?" Kairi said squeakily.

"Hey, can I talk to you for a sec?"

"Sure um, I have to catch the bus though…you want to meet somewhere?"

"Yeah sure, I have to work later, do you mind meeting me there?"

"No, what's the name of the place?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Thunder was heard rolling across the previously blue sky. Dark rain clouds were marring the beautiful blue making the inhabitants of the world want to crawl inside a hole and sleep. Below the sky on the ground were shiny silver bleachers of which two brothers were seated.

Sora couldn't bring himself to look over at his older brother. Whatever secret he had had was long gone. The blonde knew, and he wasn't taking it well.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Roxas asked trying to hide the anger in his voice. Sora didn't answer him. He merely looked up to the sky and closed his eyes as rain drops started dropping slowly from the sky.

"So you're not going to tell me…?" Roxas said quietly looking over at the other teen.

"Roxas you wouldn't have wanted to know." Sora said barely above a whisper.

"Of course I would, I mean…you're my….you're my…brother." Roxas said trying to get out the unfamiliar word.

"Yeah, and nothing more." Sora said quietly. "You know now…lets just pretend you never found out."

"Why would I do that?" Roxas asked trying to catch Sora's eye. Sora however continued to avoid eye contact.

"Because you don't want to know me. I was your brother for six years; we no longer know each other."

Roxas frowned and looked down at his hands. "We could try."

Sora finally broke his gaze with the stormy sky and looked over at his brother. "It's not worth it."

"I believe it is."

This time Sora looked down at his hands. He sighed sadly and pulled something out of his jeans pocket. It was a photograph. "Here…do you…do you recognize them?" Sora said handing the photo over to Roxas.

Roxas looked the picture over and something clicked in his mind.

_/flashback/_

"_Woxas?! Wheres are you?" A small voice said. Sora looked desperately around the big room and then spotted a shock of blonde hair coming from in front of the large leather couch. _

"_Theres you are!" Sora said running around the couch and pouncing on his older twin brother. "What are yous doing?" _

"_I'm reading." Roxas said showing him the encyclopedia he was previously reading. _

"_This books too big." Sora said looking at the pictures in the book. Coming across a picture he particularly liked, he looked up at his twin brother and asked what it was. _

"_That's a panda." Roxas said reading the words on the side of the picture. _

"_I wants one." Sora said tracing the edge of the picture with his pinky finger. _

"_You can't have one. They live far away." Roxas said turning the page of the encyclopedia. _

"_I wants one of those then." Sora said pointing to a baby seal on the page._

"_Sora don't be silly, you can't have one of those either." Roxas said closing the book. _

"_I'm not silly." Sora said pouting at the blonde. Roxas rolled his eyes and pushed his brother off of him. _

"_Of course you're not." A woman's voice said. It belonged to their mother who had just entered the room followed by their father. _

"_Mamma I wants a bwaby seal!" Sora said running over to his mother and jumping in her arms._

"_Maybe for your birthday." His father said patting Sora's head._

"_Daddy that's ridiculous." Roxas said, smiling at the use of the large r-word. _

"_Oh come now, Roxas. Don't bash his dreams."_

_/end flashback/_

"My parents…?" Roxas whispered looking at the picture. It depicted a beautiful blonde haired woman and a handsome chocolate haired man. They looked no older than 25. Besides them stood two little boys. Roxas and Sora.

"And us." Sora finished glancing at the picture.

Roxas nodded and continued to stare at the picture. Tears came to his eyes for some reason as he was slowly discovering his past life. Then all of the sudden something struck him.

"You…you're the kid in the picture at the foster care agency." Roxas said looking over at Sora.

Sora frowned. Roxas already knew enough about him and now he knew he was foster kid. "Yeah…" Sora muttered looking down at his hands.

"But…if we're brothers…wouldn't we have been adopted together?" Roxas asked curiously.

"You're parents didn't want me." Sora said shivering as the rain started falling heavily on him.

"They aren't like that…" Roxas said quietly watching the rain drops fall.

"Maybe they aren't around you…"

"Where…who do you live with then?" Roxas asked slowly.

"…I'm not supposed to tell."

"I won't tell anyone. I promise." Roxas said looking at Sora sincerely.

Sora avoided his gaze and bit his lip. "You know Riku…the 'hot god'…."

"Yeah?"

"He's my foster brother." Sora said reluctantly thinking back to Riku. He was so glad Riku was spending the next few days at a friend's house. He'd probably avoid a lot of trouble. But seeing as Tifa was visiting his house tonight, he probably wouldn't.

"He is? Jeeze…" Roxas muttered thinking back to the time Riku nearly strangled Sora to death. "He's um….violent."

"You get used to it." Sora lied under his breath. He sniffled loudly as the rain was starting to make him feel depressed. Looking up, Sora smirked when he saw that Roxas's hair was flat against his head.

"What? Yours isn't any better." Roxas said noting Sora's usually spiky hair was flat against his head also. The rain water flattening it out gave Roxas's a good idea of how long his hair really was. It was past his shoulders for sure.

"Roxas can I ask you a question?" Sora said glancing over at his brother.

"Sure."

"Are you…happy with your life?" Sora asked quietly, pulling at his sleeves that were clinging to his wet skin.

Roxas bit his lip. Of course he was happy with his life. Or he used to be. Now everything seemed so messed up. So wrong. Here he was talking with a brother he had never met. Or if he had met him, he had forgotten all about his twin. He didn't know who his parents were and only had a picture that sparked one memory. He didn't know why people were hiding things from him and why they just wouldn't tell the truth. Happy? Honestly, no.

"I…no…not right now." Roxas said pulling his hood of his hoodie over his head. "Everything's so…."

"'effed up?"

"Yeah…"

"It sucks you know…" Sora started staring out at the large football field. "Not being normal."

Roxas felt tears come to his eyes at those words. Not being normal. He could try for the rest of his life to be like everyone else yet they'd never accept him. Being normal. What was the definition for that?

"How can you tell…?" Roxas said quietly glancing over at his twin brother. Sora pulled at a piece of his hair and sighed softly.

"You always wanted to be better, Roxas."

Roxas looked down at the rain landing loudly on the shiny silver bleachers. "I know."

"When will you ever learn that being the best just isn't worth it?" Sora asked furrowing his eyebrows in an emotion unbeknownst to Roxas.

"When I learn that it isn't worth it to be the best." Roxas answered pulling at his hoodie's zipper. "I don't know who else to be…"

"Try being Roxas."

"I don't know who Roxas is. I don't know where he comes from or where he's going."

Sora shivered against the blowing wind and closed his eyes. "Roxas was born on November 14th, he had a twin brother who was born 17 hours later. He never knew his birth father but loved the man who raised him. He was a Mama's boy at heart and never left her side. Roxas was in an accident involving a firearm at age six. And since you're him, you know you can't remember."

Roxas jerked his head in Sora's direction, his mouth gaping. "A…a…firearm? You mean a gun?!"

"What else…" Sora said quietly.

"How…how did that happen?" Roxas asked shocked at the words Sora had just spoken. He was shot. Lord god he was shot!

"It was accident, remember?" Sora lied.

"Where…where were mom and dad?" Roxas asked prodding for more information.

"It happened to them too." Sora muttered taking a breath. It wasn't worth lying about. Roxas had the right to know what happened to his parents.

"Then it couldn't have been an accident." Roxas said staring Sora in the eye.

"Maybe not, but when the world says it's an accident, it's an accident."

The boys were quiet for the next few minutes. Both of them were lost in their own thoughts. Sora was busy thinking of how he was going to get out of this mess while Roxas was busy trying to recover bits and pieces of memories. After awhile however, Roxas came up with an interesting question.

"Sora…what happened to you?"

Sora shuddered and pulled his arms together across his chest. "I…I wasn't hit. I was just…there."

Roxas nodded, deciding not to push the subject. Another few minutes passed as the rain continued to patter heavily on the two figures. It was the perfect weather for such an uneasy mood.

Looking down at his cold hands, Roxas decided to ask one last question of his new found brother.

"Sora…did we…did we like each other?"

Sora looked over and surprised himself with giving Roxas a genuine smile. "Yeah, yeah we did."

Roxas smile back and turned his face back out towards the field. "Do you…do you think…do you think we could pick up from where we left off? Is it possible for us to be friends?"

Sora had never expected this. He'd expected Roxas to hound him for answers and then run off. He never expected his brother to want to be friends. He never expected the unexpected. However much he wanted to tell his brother no, he just couldn't. Sure he'd spare himself of relieving painful memories, but was it worth losing the only family member he had left?

"…I...yes…It's a possibility." Sora said after a few minutes. Looking up he noticed the sun coming out from behind the stormy skies. Yeah. It was a definite possibility.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I wish you'd understand that I'm not the boy you see. I guess a bullet plus delusion doesn't get a plea. I hope when you see inside you won't run away. They make promises but I see truth when they stay. I can't erase my past and I cannot paint my fate. I hope that when you see my heart you won't send out your hate. We were two boys who were so much the same. But because of my acts I'm the one put to blame. Please note that I won't deny the ache. For honestly his death wasn't a mistake. He took my life and I'd take his own. But I now know the truth because I am grown. Please believe the words that I say. My future wasn't supposed to be this way.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review Responses! (Yes, I'm back to these…)

**Key46812**- Kinda freaky huh? I thought it was. Thanks for reviewing though and review again!

**Aquired.minds**- I know he was really cute with the mispronunciation. Thank you so much for reviewing and review again!

**29AG**- I thought it was a pretty nice touch too. Though slightly disturbing. Anyways, thanks for reviewing and please review again!

**Choc-co-lat Cheese**- You got your update! Yay. Yes, he does need Kairi…soon. Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

**RevealedSecrets**- I know it was sad. I was so sad writing the part about Sora looking for his mom. –tears- Anyway, yes I thought it was a nice twist with him killing the guy. Anyways, thanks for reviewing and review again!

**PrincessKairi3**- Yep, It was Sora's past was due. It took me awhile to decide on when to put it up. I hope I put it up that the right time. Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**Darkwing13**- I know that chapter was really depressing for me to write. The happiness at the beginning and then the murdering….-sighs-. I felt so bad for Sora. UU Anyways, thank you so much for reviewing and please review again!

**Alantie Mistaniu**- Yeah, pwoor Sora needs a hug. Don't worry though, It's coming up soon. : ) Thanks for reviewing again, I appreciate it. Please review again!

**Divinehearts**- Well now you know, they talked to each other a lot. It was due. Most definitely. Anyway, I appreciate your review. It means a whole lot. : ) Please review again!

**Shadowtailmon**- I'm sorry that I didn't do them. Life is really hectic for me right now with school starting back so I didn't have the time. It was either don't post the chapter and wait awhile, or post it without review responses. I thought you guys would prefer the chapter so I went ahead with that. I'll try to continue doing the review responses when I get the time to though. : ) Anyway, thank you for reviewing and please do review again!

**The Second Sight Alchemist**- Freaky huh? Lol, it was interesting chapter all right. I'm glad you liked it though! Thank you so much for reviewing and review again!

**Isler-** Thank you! I'm glad you love the story. : ) Please continue to review I really love them. Thanks so much for reviewing again!

**KHgirl23-** I know cries It was depressing. Though things are starting to look up. Thanks for reviewing and review again!

**Evil Genius of the COCA-** Let me just start by saying I missed you so much! –hugs- I was wondering where you went. Hope you enjoyed your theatre camp though. : ) Thank you so much for reviewing the other chapters, it means a lot. Anyways, I know your theory was close. Very close. And the poor little Sora. This chap nearly broke my heart. And yes, Roxas was very lucky. I couldn't have made him die, it would've killed me. Thanks for reviewing my friend and please review again!

**xxjust-a-nobodyxx-** I know poor Sora! And it only gets worse, believe me. He needs somebody badly. : ( Thanks so much for reviewing and please review again!

**Typical Sundays-** Hey hey! Thank you so much for such a nice review. : ) I'm glad you like the story and thanks for the compliment on my writing style. I appreciate it. Thank you so much for reviewing and please review again!

**Black-Dax-** Yep, he just turned 16 so two more years. And the money thing will be discussed in further chapters so hang tight. They might by moofing off him or they might not be. Thanks for reviewing and please review again my friend!

**Ice Everlastin**g.- Wow! I'm so glad you liked it enough to put off playing such an addicting game. I'm glad my story is worth your time. I'm honored. Seriously. Thank you so much for reviewing and please do review once again!

**Kupo 3.0**- -hands you cookie- Thanks for reviewing! Yes you were right, he did shoot somebody. I couldn't have Sora shoot his own family though…I'd kill myself before I made him do that. Though seeing as the man he shot was his birth father…well yeah I guess I'm dead. XD Oh yeah, I'm sorry about your summer projects. That must seriously suck. Anyways, thank you so much for reviewing and please review again my friend!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: Okay, there's your next chapter. I have no idea when the next chapter will be up just to let you know. Please bear with me. I have a good idea about the next chapter, but I'm not too sure. I have to start writing it soon. Anyways, thanks for reading and please review!

Oh yeah, and for all who don't review but favorite. **SHAME ON YOU**. –cough- Anyway, till next time.

Peace


	24. Ice Diamonds and a Girl Named Willa

A/N:…Pretty pointless chapter here. No comment.

Warning: Half of this chapter is probably review responses…don't kill me, I got 33 and I'm trying to reply to all of them so you guys won't get mad.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I'm not sure why the world can't see what I see. I'm seeing hate flying towards me like a fierce wind. The world sees drama. Some see love. I'm not of the world, I don't belong in it. I sit upon the clouds trying to stand up. To be the only one who can rise above. But when I come falling down from the heavens my acts will come to haunt me. Nobody will catch me when I fall. Being strong isn't about being better, It's about being better when you aren't strong. My wings will catch me as I fall. I'm a bit better off than I thought I was.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I'd like to start off by apologizing. What I did…and said, was wrong." Namine said quietly looking across at the nervous red headed girl.

Kairi searched Namine's face intently at this. She was weary of the apology for many things: This apology was coming straight out of the blue, Namine had never spoken any kind words to her ever, and after the whole mishap with Riku she was cautious of becoming the butt end of the next school prank.

"May I…may I ask why you're apologizing?" Kairi said quietly.

Namine sighed and slouched a bit in her chair. Having been the girl everyone loved to hate for so long, apologizing in depth still proved to be an issue. Namine wasn't an extremely nice and sensitive girl at heart; yes she was friendly, but nice? Not always. Namine had learned to be very cautious around other people. Females in particular. Whenever something went wrong she ran away. This time however she was going to change that.

"I need to apologize because…It's the right thing. I've made way too many enemies at school. The results of that have pretty much left me friendless. I believed that…well…" Namine sighed and traced her finger along the edge of the table they were sitting at. She had to get this out. "I was thinking that because I don't have a history with you. That because you were new and I was just being a jerk…maybe I could fix it."

Kairi gulped and looked out the window nervously. "You mean…?"

"I mean perhaps we can be friendly towards each other. I'm not saying we have to be friends. I know you wouldn't want to be friends with me after what I've done to you…but at least I could know that you don't hate me and you could know that I don't hate you."

Kairi sighed in relief. Namine sounded sincere. It was almost…bizarre. "I think I could manage that."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sora took in a deep breath as he heard the doorbell ring from downstairs. Sora knew it was Tifa. He also knew that his foster parents were saving his 'punishment' for after Tifa left. The only good thing coming out of this was that Riku wasn't going to be there to watch.

"Sora, you're teacher is here!" Came the sickening fake sweet voice of Sora's foster mother. Everybody in this house was so fake.

"Coming." Sora said grudgingly. As he quietly walked down the steps he could hear his foster parents offering Tifa refreshments of which she coldly denied.

"Hi." Sora said softly as he entered the large living room. Tifa greeted him with a smile and then turned to face his foster parents.

"Well I wanted to discuss a few things with you." Tifa started, pulling out a random piece of paper that looked like it was filled with notes. "Why is it that Sora is constantly coming to class with cuts, bruises, broken wrists and so on?" Tifa said staring coldly at the surprised pair of adults.

"He has?" Serena, Riku's mother, squeaked out.

"You mean you didn't notice it when he came home?" Tifa asked suspiciously.

"Well my wife and I go out a lot. Plus I'm a busy man with my job and all. So is my wife." Kiyoshi, Riku's father, said putting on a better cover than his wife.

"So you're never at home." Tifa stated as a fact.

"Yes, I mean no…we are home." Serena said wringing her hands. Sora looked at them and smirked evilly when their eyes locked on his. Sure they'd kill him later for it, so why not have some fun while he could?

"You know we have a son, Riku." Kiyoshi said quietly. "He's our birth son…naturally we'd pay more attention to him."

Sora cringed at those words and looked down at his hands. They always found a way to make him feel so small.

"So why do you have Sora as your foster child if you're not going to care for him as much as your birth child?"

"Because, it was our duty."

"Your duty?"

"Yes. Sora's father was my colleague. It was only right that I take his orphaned child under my wing."

Sora cringed once again. 'Orphaned child' that's what he was. Riku's family had only taken him as their foster child because of their appearance. It would've looked so bad if Riku's father didn't take the child of his best friend. It also didn't help that in the rich community taking a foster child made you look significant. It gave you status; it made you look like you cared for the environment. Sora was only an 'item' he was only something that made Riku's family look better, richer, more god like.

"Okay…so where did all the injuries come from? Why's he covering them up with make-up?"

Sora gulped and started twisting the bottom of his shirt nervously. Why did Tifa know so much? Surely she never saw him put it on. Nobody had seen him covering up with make up. Then Sora frowned when he realized someone had. Roxas had seen him covering up. He couldn't have told Tifa…right?

"Sora has trouble with bullies at school. He didn't want anyone to see what happens so that's why he covers up." Kiyoshi said nervously. He had never expected the teacher to bring any of this up. He had believed this meeting was going to be about Sora's grades.

"One of the bullies who pick on Sora is your own son, Riku. I have to wonder what goes on at home you know. I really have to wonder if you, his foster 'parents', stop your son from beating him up. Or maybe you just watch…or join in."

The room was silent for a couple of minutes. Tifa smirked at the two adults and stood up. "If I see any more of this I'm calling the social services to investigate your home."

"You have no right." Riku's father said standing up angrily.

Tifa smirked and beckoned for Sora to follow her. "I think not."

Once outside, Tifa took the time to slowly look Sora over. "Are you okay?" She asked after a minute.

"I'm fine Tifa." Sora lied putting on a fake smile that he was sure Tifa could see through.

"No, you're not. Something's wrong Sora. You can tell me…"

Sora bit his lip and smiled again. "Tifa I'm fine. Really."

Tifa sighed and looked upset for a moment. "Okay…just, please tell me if anything's wrong." She said quietly, walking off to her car.

Sora sighed and rubbed his forehead as he watched her drive away. Why couldn't he just tell her the truth? Why couldn't he just let it out?"

"Sora!" Came an angry voice from inside the large house. Sora sighed once again and made his way back to the living room.

"Yes?" He said timidly upon entering the room. Serena looked depressed and was busy running her frantic hands through her hair. Kiyoshi on the other hand was fuming. His face was red with anger and looked as if he was going to burst.

"How the hell did she figure out about all that?!" He yelled loudly, staggering up to face Sora.

"I didn't tell her anything." Sora whispered backing away from the angry man.

"Well let me tell you something-" The man started however he was stopped by the ringing of his cell-phone.

"What do you want?!" The man spat angrily into his phone. "Are you kidding me?!" He yelled a minute later, running over to one of the large windows in the room. "Fine I'll be right there." He muttered hanging up.

"What's wrong honey?" Serena said approaching him.

"Look outside, it's 'effin snowing! The people down at the resort are getting' pissed."

"Snowing?!" Serena yelled running over to the window followed by Sora and Kiyoshi. Sure enough, little white flakes were falling slowly from the sky. The ground below was already blanketed in a thin layer of snow.

"Hasn't ever snowed here…" Kiyoshi muttered jabbing a cigarette in his mouth.

"What are we going to do? All the guests will leave the resort." Serena stated frowning at the white flakes. Sora however had a small smile on his face that he was yearning to make bigger. Snow. He'd heard about it; it was supposed to be cold and wet. He couldn't wait to go outside and touch the cotton looking blanket.

"Lord knows…I'm going out to see what I can do." Kiyoshi muttered stomping off towards the door, his thoughts on Sora long forgotten. As soon as Sora heard Kiyoshi's care back out of the driveway, he ran towards the door and opened it with a slam.

Running outside he jumped a little on the concrete feeling the snow crunch under his shoes. After a few seconds he knelt down and placed his hand on the white blanket. It was freezing! Sora smiled and wrote his name in the snow, then he drew doodles and logos and finally someone else's name. Kairi. Blushing, he quickly erased the name and stood up. He shouldn't have such feelings for her for she most definitely didn't feel the same.

Standing up he decided he'd take a quick walk through the park. It was nice outside and he needed to clear his head of all the troubling events that had happened today.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hi!" A small voice said from out of nowhere. Sora looked down to see a small raven haired girl smiling back up at him. Sora raised his eyebrow but gave a small smile back. Something about the little girl made him want to give a real smile.

"Hello." Sora said quietly looking around the vacant park. It was an odd thing, this little girl being out without an adult.

"My name's Willa." The girl said smiling back at him. "Wanna pway with me?" Sora smiled at the little girl when she said those words. It sounded just like him when he was little.

"Willa where's your mom?" Sora asked kneeling down so he was eye level with the small girl.

"She's at work." The girl stated simply. Sora then noticed that the girl was dressed in shabby clothes and looked as if she were from one of the poor neighborhoods.

"Where's your dad then?" Sora asked already knowing the answer. He knew for sure that the father was either drunk, dead, or had left them.

"He's gone. I don't know where he is." Willa said quietly looking around at the snowy atmosphere. Sora nodded and sighed.

"Is there anyone who's watching you?" He asked bringing the girl back to his attention.

"Nope, I'm a big girl, I don't need anybody." The girl said smiling up at him. Sora frowned at this and rubbed his forehead.

"How old are you, Willa."

"I'm six."

"Six…" Sora muttered slowly.

"That's right." The girl said, nodding her head. "I'm big aren't I?"

"Yeah, you are…" Sora said giving her a small smile. _Not big enough to be all alone though. _

"What's your name?" Willa asked interrupting Sora from his thoughts.

"Oh um, my names Sora."

"Sora…that's pretty."

Sora blushed and smiled. "Um thanks."

"How old are you?" The girl said after a couple of seconds. "I bet your 19."

Sora chuckled and stood up. "No, I'm just 16."

"Really? You can drive a car then!"

"Sure can."

"I bet you have a girlfriend too." Willa stated half smiling half smirking.

Sora once again blushed. This kid knew how to make him feel awkward. "Uh…no, I don't."

"Why not?"

"Because I just…I…" Sora muttered. He could always lie, but then he knew this kid was smart enough to detect it. It wasn't worth the trouble. "I'm not good with girls." Sora said putting it as simply as he could. Heck no he wasn't good with girls. He scared most of them.

"Well you're nice to me." Willa stated. "I'd like you if I were older."

Sora blushed and scratched the back of his head. "No you wouldn't."

"Don't tell me what I'm thinking." Willa said frowning at him. "I would if I wanted to."

"Oh okay then." Sora said quickly.

"Do you have friends?"

Sora raised his eyebrow. "One yes."

"Well I'm number two then." Willa stated grinning from ear to ear. "You're my new best friend."

"Wow um…" Sora said quietly not sure what to say to that.

"What do you want for Christmas?" Willa asked changing the subject.

"Christmas? Um, not anything really."

"Are you crazy?! How could you not want presents?!" Willa said loudly, looking at Sora as if he were insane.

"Because I just…I don't know, it's not important."

"Well it is to me."

"But you're younger, of course it's important."

"I'm a big girl!"

"I know I know, It's just…how do I put it…more exciting for people who are six."

"Well I wouldn't know…" Willa muttered kicking at a pebble partially buried in snow.

"Why not?" Sora asked searching her eyes.

"Cause I don't get presents for Christmas."

Sora frowned at this. Of course she didn't. She had only one parent that was probably struggling just to pay for the bills. Of course they didn't have any spare money.

"Do you want one?" He asked after a moment.

"Yes." Willa said frowning at her shabby shoes.

"What do you want?" Sora asked taking her hand and leading her over to a bench. Willa sighed and beant down, continuing to stare at her shoes.

"I want a necklace."

"A necklace?" Sora asked a little surprised. He'd expected her to name some toy she wanted.

"Yeah, a special one. One that's only mine."

"I see. What do you want it to look like?"

"I want it to have a white heart on it."

"Anything else?"

"Blue sparkly things."

"Blue sparkly things?" Sora asked confused. Then it clicked. "You mean rhinestones?"

"Yeah!" Willa said smiling up at him. "Do you like rhinestones?"

Sora smiled at the girl and nodded. "Yeah I do." He answered. They were pretty, yes, but he'd never wear them.

"I'd want a silver chain too. I like silver."

"Silver's a nice choice." Sora said quietly. "How would you like a diamond on the necklace?"

"You mean a real one?" Willa asked bouncing a little. "I like real ones."

"Yeah, a real one. Maybe in the middle of the heart."

"Oh that's pretty!" Willa said thinking of the necklace she could never have.

"You can have it if you want." Sora said smiling at the little girl.

"I don't have any money…" Willa muttered looking back down at her shoes.

"That doesn't matter. If you want it, I'll get it for you." Sora had no idea why he was being so friendly to the little girl. Plus he was promising to buy her something. He couldn't help it however, she was so cute. She also reminded him so much of himself it was hardly believable.

"Really?!" Willa said looking up happily.

"Yeah really."

"For Christmas?"

"Yep." Sora said smiling again at the little girl. "I'll send it to you when it's done."

"Wow…I love you." The little girl said hugging the goth kid.

Sora blushed and hugged her back. "Come on, let's get you home."

As Sora was being led to the little girl's run down neighborhood, he couldn't help but feel guilty. He had so much cash, it just wasn't right. He couldn't think long on his thoughts when the little girl popped up with a question Sora had never expected.

"Why are you dark on the outside but light on the inside?" Willa asked looking up at Sora.

Sora bit his lip and looked down at the girl who had a serious look on her face. "What exactly do you mean?"

"You know what I mean." The girl said simply. "That's my house." She said quietly running up to the front door.

Sora grimaced at the dilapidated look of the home. They had it real bad.

"Bye bye Sora." Willa said opening her door while giving the boy a big smile.

Sora smiled back and waved goodbye.

As Sora left the shabby run down house of his new found kid friend, he took down the address to make sure he sent it to the right place. Two days later a small black box arrived at the house. Inside was a dazzling necklace, a heart made of tiny diamonds with a large one in the middle. Around the heart was a circle of blue rhinestones and attached to it was a small silver chain.

In the bottom of the box was a small note and seven crisp 100 dollar bills in which the small girl was to give to her mother.

The note simply read:

_To Willa, from her friend, Sora. I love you too._

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Simply put, I never thought something so pure could see through something so tainted. It's a matter of the eyes they say. But I'm thinking the heart. Maybe I'm not as lost as I thought I was. Maybe through eyes that don't judge I'm normal. You gave me a small spark of hope today. I'm not as gone as I thought I was. I'm still standing here.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Review responses!

Bataru- No problem, don't worry about it. What counts is that you left at least one review, that's enough to make me happy. : ) I'm glad you love the story! I know Sora's life is tough, but changes are coming. I liked the brother interaction too even though it was a lot of dialogue. Anyways, thanks for reviewing and review again!

Alantie Mistaniu- I thought this chapter was pretty great too. The dialogue was so tough to write for some reason. I'm glad it came out alright. : ) I'm really glad you liked the chapter. It means a lot. Oh and thanks so much for reviewing and thanks for giving me your word that you'll review again: -)

.sora.luves.me.- I'm glad you liked the chapter! I love writing when they were younger, It's so adorable. Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

RevealedSecrets- I'm liking the connection too. Hopefully I'm not rushing it. I want this story to be evenly paced. And yes, there will be more flashbacks for sure. Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

daniela- I'm glad you love it! Thanks for taking the time to read and review it. It makes me so happy. : ) Please Review again!

aquired.minds- Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you loved it, and hopefully I can keep updating this story every three days. I hope you liked the new chapter. It took some thought. : ) And I seriously hate that favorite but no review thing. I think all authors do. Anyways, thanks so much for reviewing and please do review again!

DieChan- Glad you liked the chapter! About the whole deceiving thing, I seriously don't have the time to do the linking. I have a busy schedule and I'm struggling to get these chapters out on time. Maybe in the future when I have time to do that I will. However for now you guys are just going to have to deal with it. I can't do anything about it right now, sorry. Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

Kimitala- I'm glad you love this story, I seriously am. : ) I'm also glad that each chapter makes you want to read more. It takes a lot of effort trying to make this story interesting and it pays off with reviews like this. : D You're right, Sora does remind me of that song. Nice connection. Anyways, thanks for reviewing and please review again! (It'll mean a lot)

Shana.95- It was weird? Okay…that's your opinion. It was due time that Roxas talk to Sora so I thought it'd be okay. But oh well. I'm glad you said it was alright though. Thanks for reviewing and please review again.

Snowyleapard- I'm glad you like it even though it's a drama. I tend to do the same thing, I avoid most dramas. However, since this story has so many connections to my life I thought it would be a good idea and it was. I'm glad you enjoy it. : ) Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

Choc-co-lat Cheese- Thank you! I feel so honored that it's your number one favorite story. : ) And thanks so much for spreading the word about it, that means a whole a lot to me. I'm not lying. Thanks for leaving this review because It made me feel really special.

: ) Please review again!

Evil Genius of the COCA- Yay! Well I'm glad you're back to reading, I seriously missed your comments. : ) I know, they finally talked to each other. I don't think I could've lasted another chapter with it not happening. And the friendship thing needed to come into play for Namine and Kairi sooner or later. She can't have only one friend that's for sure. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this new chapter and I'm looking forward to your next review! Till next time my friend. : ) 

shadowtailmon- I know bad Roxy! Don't bash wittle Sora's dreams. I know it stinks not having enough time. Lol, I've been tempted not to do homework and instead write stories and procrastinate. However I must keep up my grades or let's say my parents would make it so that I never update again. That seriously wouldn't be good. Lol, the Mamma's boy thing. I thought it was cute so I added it in. And yeah I really dislike the Kairi/Sora pairing. It gets on my last dying nerve. However I changed Kairi's personality in this story to fit mine so it isn't that bad. I tried to make her different you know. Anyways, thanks for reviewing and please review again!

Key46812- Lol! Thanks for reviewing…or screaming. Hehe, please review again!

Aleda12- Your welcome for the update! More Roxas and Sora stuff is coming in future chapters for sure. : ) Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

SimplySarah1221- Your welcome. :-) The Roxas and Sora bonding should be good and now you know what happened to Namine and Kairi. Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

kyla-is-da-name- Thanks! I know the rejection was kind of interesting. I felt sorry for Kairi actually. And yes, that talk did clear some things up. It was needed. Thanks a lot for reviewing and please review again!

The Second Sight Alchemist- Lol, I know it was cute wasn't it? Thank you for reviewing the chapter and please review the next!

Typical Sundays- I know, its sad isn't it? That'll be explained in future chapters why they didn't want him. I'm glad he has someone to. Someone to talk to and everything. Thank you for reviewing once again. It means a lot. : ) Please review again!

angelofsweetness- I know it was really cute. Things will start to get better soon, don't worry. And yes, Kairi and Namine's conversation was brief, but it's a start. : ) Thanks for reviewing my friend and please review again!

Divinehearts- They are so adorable together…-sniffles- I wanna hug em both. Yeah Namine knows, but not Kairi. And that'll come in the future. Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

KHgirl23- You got your update: ) Thanks for reading and please review again!

darkwing13- Yes friends indeed. It was about time you know. And now you know what when on between Namine and Kairi. Not too much but not too little. Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

Ice.Everlasting.- Yay I'm glad you beat the game! I adore that game, lol, that's why I'm writing a fanfic with it's characters. I'm glad you got your update too, I'd be pretty happy if I was in your place. (Believe me, I live for updates on stories I like) Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

Kupo3.0- Lol, I am very thankful for such a loyal fan and friend. Aw, don't be jealous, I ain't that great really. And yes, the fluff….I live for fluffy and fuzzy things it's so sweet. I hate the favorite but no review. Get off your lazy butts and review my dang story! –pouts- anyway. Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

Wings of Water- SKYE- Yay I'm glad you like my story so much: ) Lol, Sora is pretty cool. So are the others, I think they're pretty cool too (besides Riku) And yeah Sora should. You shouldn't keep that inside no duh. Anyway, thanks for reviewing and please review again!

Zim'sGirl56- Woot! Glad you like it. : ) And yes, Sora is hot cute and adorable as a goth. Me loves it. Anyways, please review again and thanks for reviewing!

Isler- That's totally ok. : ) And don't ever doubt that you don't count on this. Seriously, your reviews are as important as the rest. You should join the site though, it's fun. : ) Glad you love the story! Please review again and thanks for reviewing!

GIGhearts- Thanks! Review again!

Sweeten19- Okay I was a little confused by the review. I'm not sure what it meant but that's okay. : ) Thanks so much for reviewing anyway, and please review again!

RoxasTheOther- I know it was an interesting twist I thought. Only did it cause I didn't want to do a phone conversation. Anyway, thanks for reviewing and please review again!

Malcolm Yuy- Glad you liked it! Thought you left the story for awhile, lol. Anyways, I thought the little poems were kind of cute. Thank you for saying I have skills because I don't believe I have any. That was a nice compliment. I wanted to make Roxas sweet in this story so I didn't want him to hound for answers. Maybe I should've but I don't know. Thanks for reading and reviewing and please review again!

Chibifeather- Thank you! And yes I like the friendship thing too. I thought it was cute. : )

Lol, addicted is good I think. : ) Thanks for reviewing and please review again!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So there goes a pretty pointless chapter. I'm trying to show a soft side in Sora so I wanted to do something that didn't deal directly with the plot…hope it went okay. Anyway, please forgive me about the masses of review responses. I know it's discouraging to think you have more to read when you don't. Believe me, I'm going to do the link thingy soon, just bear with me.

On another note…I started school today. Yay. Not. I swear I'm already counting down the days to summer break again…wish me luck. 

Oh yeah, forgot to mention something. There will be a lot more on the Namine Kairi business, don't think that's the end. I just didn't feel like writing too much more on the that subject for this chapter.

Peace.


	25. You Can't Hide Your Hurts

A/N: Sora Kairi chapter here…no one else. Kinda fluffy kind of angsty. No review response this chapter, I'm too busy so deal with it please. Anyway, enjoy.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Today I smiled because I thought it was over. Tomorrow I'll smile because I know it is over. Yesterday I smiled because I knew it was over. Tonight I'll frown because I know it is over. Someday you'll figure out why it all ended so soon. Why sixteen years was a bit too long a time to be around. Maybe you'd miss me if I left for heaven. But maybe you'll laugh and say good riddance. Tonight I'll smile because I've found a way. Tonight's going to be forever and forever today.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Loud music was heard from the depths of the huge Wakayama residence. Usually a fairly quite home, it was an unexpected and unappreciated gesture of individuality that was driving a few of the neighbors mad.

Sora hummed along with the loud screaming tones of Metallica as he took out his window cleaner and sprayed his bedroom mirror. Sora had a thing about cleanliness and couldn't go a day without doing a 'spring' cleaning.

Getting a bit hyper, Sora took a swag of the soda he had on his spotless desk and started jumping around the room in attempts to grow tired. A minute later he started cussing loudly when he heard the faint beep of his cell phone. He had hoped that the loud music would hide the sound of the annoying beeper.

Turning off the loud music, Sora dove across his bed and flipped open the phone.

"'ello?"

"Hi Sora, its Kairi."

Sora who had been closing his eyes and laying flat against his fluffy bed sat up immediately. "Hey." He said smiling sheepishly at his own image in the large mirror. He looked so ridiculous. His hair was smack against his head from taking a shower; he was wearing a white jacket with panda's littering the exterior and baggy jeans. Some goth.

"What's up?" Kairi said cheerily.

"Nothing much. Just cleaning."

"Cleaning?" Kairi asked surprised. Who the heck cleaned during winter break?

"Heh…um, I'm kind of a neat freak."

"Would've never guessed…" Kairi muttered. "So anyway, what are you doing today?"

"Nothin' really. Foster parents and Riku are out for the weekend. Thank god."

"Hehe, so you get the house all to yourself, hmm?" Kairi asked quietly.

"You know I don't even want to know what you mean by that…" Sora said standing up and grabbing a comb.

Kairi giggled into the phone. "Did you see then snow?" She asked changing the subject.

"Yeah it's awesome." Sora said looking out the window. The snow was still falling from two days ago. It was what some people called a blizzard.

"Let's go sledding on it." Kairi said smiling into the phone.

"Sledding?" Sora asked curiously.

"Yeah, you've never tried it?"

"I've never seen snow before so yeah…" Sora said a little embarrassed.

"Oh my gosh! You have to come then, it's so fun!"

"Wait, you've done it before?"

"Yeah, it snowed back on the other island a couple times before."

"Ah okay."

"So?"

"So what?"

"Are you coming?" Kairi asked giggling.

"Yeah sure." Sora said smiling a bit nervously into the phone. He prayed they wouldn't be crashing to their deaths on some large hill.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"No. Never." Sora said gasping at the large hill of which they were looking down.

"Come on, it's not that scary." Kairi said giggling.

"Kairi…aren't you a little…um, apprehensive?" Sora asked backing a way from the steep edge.

"Let me see…no." Kairi said firmly, setting down her sled.

Sora gulped and sat down on the ground wincing at how cold it was. He had never expected Kairi of all people to be so…adventurous. She was usually so shy and timid.

"So um…how are we going to do this?" Sora said quietly.

"You want to be in the front or in the back?" Kairi asked pulling at her glove.

"In the back." Sora said immediately.

"Why are you too afraid to ride the front?" Kairi asked teasingly as she sat down in the front of the sled.

"Yeah." Sora admitted stepping in behind her.

"Don't worry its fun." Kairi said inching the sled close to the edge of the hill.

"Um…maybe I should watch or something first." Sora said nervously, gripping to the sides of the sled.

"Nonsense, Sora." Kairi said through giggles. "Hold on to me, you'll probably fall off if you don't." Kairi said before thinking. Realizing what she had just said her face flushed a bright red.

Sora blushed also and hesitantly wrapped his arms around Kairi's waist. "Don't kill me." He whispered, half joking half meaning it. Kairi sighed and sat there for a few seconds, her head running with all the thoughts of how wonderful it would be for Sora to be her boyfriend. Kairi inwardly kicked herself at this thought however. It was never going to happen and she kept trying to convince herself she didn't like him. Right now however it wasn't working.

"Okay…hold on." Kairi said bringing herself out of her thoughts. Inching her way slowly towards the edge Kairi could feel Sora gradually tensing up. "Sora, it's not like you're riding to your death."

"I know…" Sora squeaked in a tiny, girlish voice.

Kairi giggled and gave a large heave pushing the sled over the edge of the hill. She gave out of shriek of glee as her heart started doing butterflies. The wind blowing past her face made her feel like she was flying and it would've been perfect if Sora wasn't howling and screaming like a girl behind her.

Kairi giggled madly as the sled flipped over unexpectedly hurling the two teens into the powdery sugar. "Awesome..." Kairi murmured lifting her face from the wet snow.

Sora bit his lip and stared up at the blue sky. "I am never doing that again." He muttered chuckling softly.

"Oh come on, you have to admit it was fun." Kairi said sitting up.

"That was terrifying…but fun." Sora said sitting up as well. "I guess it takes some getting used to."

Kairi giggled again and blushed glancing over at Sora a few times. He was too cute for his own good. Sora noticed her staring and rubbed his neck nervously. "So um…" He started raking his mind for something to say to break the eerie silence.

"Look at the ice Sora." Kairi said quietly looking at the pond that neither of them had noticed before. It was unusual for it was usually a water hole in warm weathers. But now everything looked different. Prettier.

"It's weird." Sora said looking over at Kairi. He didn't see what she saw in the patch of frozen water.

"It reminds me of you." Kairi said looking at Sora softly.

"Huh?"

"The ice…it's odd." Kairi murmured turning back to gaze at the pond.

"I don't see anything in it." Sora said honestly. "It's just ice."

"Think about it…maybe it will mean something to you in the future." Kairi said quietly repeating the words Sora had said in what seemed years ago.

Sora frowned and looked at the ice. He couldn't see it. Why did this remind her of him?

"I know what you meant by the rose." Kairi said quietly, thinking back to the time when they were painting scenes of nature.

"Hmm?"

"I was the rose…the living one." Kairi said quietly. "I guess it doesn't matter if I stand out…I guess I was the rose who didn't follow suite."

Sora looked over and smiled and the red head. "I didn't think you'd remember that." He said rubbing his hands together.

"It took me awhile to figure it out. I bet I still don't understand it fully."

"At least you have an idea…" Sora said looking back at the icy pond.

"The pond is your heart Sora…the ice…it's the wall around your heart."

Sora frowned and thought on this. It was odd, her seeing into him like this. She had it right. Exactly right. "I won't lie and say you're wrong." He said looking back up into the sky.

"Why won't you let it melt Sora?" Kairi asked looking over at the troubled teen.

"I…" Sora started. "I don't know…"

"Sora…why are you hiding so many things? Why do you hide what goes on?" Kairi asked searching Sora's eyes. She knew something was wrong. Ever since she saw the scars on Sora's arm she had started to question his life. After seeing the way Riku treated him she started putting the pieces together. After seeing the broken arms and wrists and bumps and bruises she knew it wasn't only Riku. She had an idea on what was going down. She wasn't as dumb as she looked.

Sora snapped his head back and tensed. She couldn't possibly know? "What…what exactly do you mean?"

Kairi reached over and pulled up Sora's sleeve revealing the numerous scars marring his skin. "That…why'd you do that?" She asked curiously.

Sora grimaced and looked away. "I have problems." He stated firmly.

"Problems come from somewhere Sora. Something else is wrong."

"Look could you just…" Sora started. He bit his lip when he felt tears coming to his eyes. He couldn't cry in front of her. He just couldn't. But before he knew it the tears came cascading down his face. A second later he felt soft arms circle around him and pull him into a tight hug.

Everything felt so wrong, breaking down in front of Kairi. Her knowing of his cutting problem and probably more. Everything felt so wrong. But right now, a little bit of right was shining through.

"I know." Kairi whispered quietly into Sora's chocolate locks.

And he knew she did.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I don't know why I let myself break down. I'm not the one who goes around crying about my life. I get on day end day out. Why'd she have to go and find out? Fifteen reasons and they still won't believe. Five questions and I might have my dream. One life is only one life to live. It's about time I find it. Let's cut the chains tonight and fly.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So yeah there you are…Kairi has a good idea about what's going on. As you can see more people are finding out. I think I have about nine more chapters to this story or so, maybe less. It's nearing the end my friends. However I'm considering a sequel. Maybe. Anyways, hope you enjoyed!

Peace.


	26. When He Snaps You'll Know To Kill Me

A/N: Warning: No happiness whatsoever in this chapter. No fluff, no love. Just angst…it's a bit depressing too. Sora snaps in this chapter.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I've got a stitched on smile and a broken wrist. I've got a spoon full of strawberry and cookie dust. I'm the freak with the name that means hell ought to pay. Listen to my words because tomorrow I'll be gone. I'll have pulled the trigger and the crowd will sigh. 'Cause the freaky misfit has finally died. And I'll be singing my way to a place between heaven and hell. Because god doesn't want me and neither the devil. I'm an unwanted child with no place to call home. Just kill my soul and let me lie in gray.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sora groaned in annoyance when the door to his bedroom opened with a loud bang. He could tell from the footsteps waking up to his bed that it was the one person Sora detested seeing in the morning.

"Get up. You have to take me somewhere." Came the demanding yet babyish voice of Riku.

"Aren't you supposed to be out of town?" Sora grumbled burying his head in his pillow.

"Yeah, but I'd rather be here bothering you." Riku said plopping himself down on Sora's bed. "Now get up, I gotta go."

"No." Sora muttered into his pillow. He didn't care if Riku decided to have a fit and pummel him to bits; he was too depressed to care. Having had Kairi pretty much figure out his whole predicament had taken a toll on him. Also, thoughts of his family had sparked sadness inside of him when he talked to Roxas the day before. To top it off, Sora had caught a pretty nasty cold and that would ruin anyone's mood.

"What?" Riku snapped pulling the pillow away from Sora's head.

"I said no. Get the heck out of my room." Sora snapped back, grabbing the pillow back from Riku.

Riku frowned and pushed Sora back against the bed angrily. "You don't have a choice!" He yelled, fists clenched.

Sora rolled his eyes and sighed. "Look I really don't want to fight with you right now."

"Who cares what you want?"

"I do." Sora replyed. Before he knew it his face was on fire.

"I get what I want." Riku snapped pulling back his fist.

Sora frowned and shoved Riku off the bed. "Get out." He said between clenched teeth.

Riku however didn't and stood up quickly. Sora didn't have time to brace himself for the impact of him hitting the floor.

"You have to take me where I want to go. It's an order."

"When the hell do I ever take orders from you?" Sora yelled standing up shakily and shoving Riku against the wall.

Riku smirked and punched Sora clear in the stomach. Sora gasped and stumbled back, giving Riku the upper hand in the fight. In a few minutes, after several kicks, punches and slaps, Riku had Sora beat.

"Now you do." Riku spat grabbing Sora and shoving him into the wall. "You had better be down stairs in less than five minutes or else." Riku finished with a smirk, letting go of a tired Sora.

Five minutes later, Sora staggered down the stairs, a glair plastered across his face. "Where are the 'effin keys." He said through gasps of pain.

"You should know, you drive." Riku said not bothering to look up from the magazine he was reading.

"God's Riku just give me the keys." Sora said limping towards the door.

Riku sighed and pulled the keys he had taken from Sora's dresser out of his pocket. "Fine." He muttered opening the door and walking outside.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Where do you want to go?" Sora said barely above a whisper as he turned out of the long driveway.

"Hmmm…dunno." Riku stated coolly.

"What?" Sora snapped looking over at Riku's smirking face. "You mean you did all that just for me to drive you to…nowhere?!"

"Hmmm, yeah?"

Sora muttered a quiet f-you and turned to face the road. "So what, should I just turn around?"

"Naw."

"Riku tell me where you want to go now!" Sora yelled, the car swerving when he did.

"I don't know." Riku replied smirking once again.

Sora sighed and hissed in pain when he turned the steering wheel. His arm hurt like hell after the twisting Riku had done to it. It already wasn't fully healed from the water burn. Riku's twist hadn't helped it any.

"Why won't you just stop?" Sora said quietly. "What did I ever do to you?"

"You invaded my wonderful life." Riku stated. "My life's been hell since the day you first walked into my house."

Sora chuckled tiredly. "Really huh? You think I like living at your house?"

Riku frowned and crossed his arms. "You took up my parent's time."

Sora laughed at this. "Really now…I took up there time…the only time they spend with me is when they're beating me up for no reason!" Sora spat angrily.

"Well its still time."

"You're sick." Sora whispered angrily. "You're the most spoiled piece of crap that I've ever encountered. Someone's going to kill you one day and I pray it's me."

Riku glared at Sora and pulled his hand off the steering wheel sending them crashing into a ditch.

"Get out." He yelled opening the passenger door. Sora stared at him but got out of the car. Riku stomped over to the driver's seat and angrily sat down, shutting the door behind him.

"My car, I drive." He stated as Sora stepped into the passenger seat. Sora rolled his eyes and fastened his seatbelt. While doing this he noticed a purple cigarette lighter. Sora smirked and picked it up. It immediately brought horrid memories of being burned by the boiling water after being accused of smoking one of the things.

Sora sighed and closed his eyes as Riku backed hectically out of the ditch. Suddenly the air in the car felt a bit thicker and Sora started getting dizzy.

"Riku how fast are you going?" Sora asked looking over at the speed monitor. It displayed that they were going 100 miles per hour. "Riku that's too fast."

"Shut the hell up." Riku said, slamming the pedal down making the car go faster.

"Riku it's starting to rain, the car will slip." Sora said getting a bit worried. They were going way too fast.

"I said shut up!" Riku yelled looking over at Sora. It only took one look and Riku's arm jerked, sending the car crashing down a hill. Sora closed his eyes and braced himself for sudden death. He could here Riku gasping and screaming beside him and the sound of metal crunching. Stabs of horrible pain came next as glass and metal started flying around him. Despite this, Sora never let out a sound.

Finally it stopped. All there was silence. Unbearable silence. And then came a voice.

"Sora?" Came a soft voice.

Sora kept his eyes closed and sighed angrily. He didn't want to hear that voice. He didn't want to here anything. He wanted it to be black, gone. He wanted to be free. He could've been free. Why couldn't he have just died? His last few thoughts had been about death. How we wanted out so bad.

"Sora…" It came again. Sora bit his lip and tried to block the sad, hurting voice. He couldn't however. He could never escape this hell.

"What?" Sora growled lifting his head from the white airbag.

"Sora…" Riku muttered again. Sora noticed that tears were cascading down his bloody face. He could care less. "Help me…" He heard Riku say quietly.

At that something inside Sora clicked. Something that he never wanted to get out had finally shown his face.

_He says 'help me'…don't you ever tell me what to do._

"Why didn't you kill me Riku?" Sora said looking down into his lap that was showered with glass.

"K-kill you?"

"Why didn't you kill me?!" Sora yelled, grabbing Riku's throat.

Riku gagged and gasped in pain. "P-please don't…" He managed to say.

Sora frowned and threw Riku back against the side of the crumpled door. Suddenly the strong smell of gasoline appeared out of nowhere. Looking down Sora noticed that there was a large pool of the liquid on the car floor.

Sora smirked at it and smiled evilly. Riku's words however brought him out of his daydream.

"Why…why aren't you in any pain?" He said looking Sora over. The boy obviously had a broken arm, broken ribs, sprains and dozens of deep cuts.

Sora smirked and pulled out a piece of glass that had previously been deep in his arm. Riku shuddered and bit back a gasp of pain after he realized he had several pieces of glass stuck in his arm.

"Why, hmm? You wanna know why…" Sora said quietly. Riku gulped and frowned as Sora turned to face him. Something wasn't right. Sora looked like he had suddenly lost it.

"Because when people beat the crap out of you everyday of your life…something like this…" Sora said, pulling out a thick piece of glass that was stuck in his leg. "This…it just doesn't hurt anymore…"

Riku frowned and leaned back against his seat. "Sora please get me out of here." He said quietly.

Sora smiled evilly once again. "You know Riku…" He said pulling out cigarette lighter he had seen before the crash. "How about we both get out of here…" He stated simply looking at the gasoline on the floor.

Riku looked at the gasoline and gasped. "Sora don't! You wouldn't!"

"Oh I would." Sora said smiling almost sweetly. He started laughing quietly at first and then burst out into insane laughter. He wasn't laughing at something funny or stupid. The laughing was maniacal, it was insane. Riku then knew that Sora had snapped. Everything that had happened to him, everything people had did to him. All the crap he was put through had finally reeled its ugly head. He'd lost it.

"Sora please…" Riku pleaded starting to sweat.

Sora continued to laugh. Everything that had happened started flashing before his eyes. The death of his parents, the gun, the foster home, the fights and the beatings. All of this turned the laughing to tears. Sora started sobbing.

"Sora please don't do this!" Riku said desperately.

Sora sobbed harder and said something almost inaudible, but Riku caught it. "Why can't you let me be happy." Sora said between sobs.

"What…?"

"All I want is to get out of here! All I want is to die!" Sora yelled flicking the cigarette lighter on.

"Sora please! You don't want to die…" Riku said, forgetting about himself.

"I've tried to kill myself ten times this year Riku…I think you know that I do." Sora said, the tears stopping altogether.

Riku frowned at this and gulped back his fear. It all seemed so clear now. Before Riku had a chance to say anything however, a wicked smile slowly made its way across Sora's distressed face.

"Let's go to sleep." Was the whisper that breathed.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The pulled the guns and laughed as they shot. I took it all and stood up to prove them not. I'm tired of being the one who falls apart. Watch me as I tear myself to pieces. I'm not afraid of being mocked and accused. You're words don't faze my shallow heart. Neither do the words of ones above or below. Cause I'm my on timer on my own little bomb, in my head it's all about me. So when I say I hate myself you'll know its all true. Listen to my conscious are the words I tell you.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: No review responses once again, sorry. I'm trying to finish this story and this is the best I can do with school demanding so much of my time. I hope you all will forgive me.

Thanks to all who reviewed! I love you guys.

Peace.


	27. Don't Say What You Don't Mean

A/N:…It's been awhile….yeah. Lately I've been…depressed? I don't know. Sorry for the slow update. Nothing really interesting in this chapter though…enjoy if you can.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I should've pulled the trigger while I had the chance. You're life was so stupid the same as mine. Yet I have a brain that's polluted and sick, but somewhere deep inside I knew this just wouldn't click. I already took him out so why take out another, deep down I'm a coward who's looking for his mother. I think I'll just forget it and laugh as they scream. Yeah believe me everything's not as it seems.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It was silent despite the loud sound of thunder crashing in the distance. Every few minutes a car would zoom by on the lone road but other than that it was quiet. No one could hear the beating of his heart, no one could here the voices raging inside his head, and no one could hear his fear. Silence was a wicked thing.

Riku closed his eyes awaiting the impact he knew was coming. Why it all had to end like this he didn't know. It would be quick though. Hopefully. However after a few seconds had passed Riku realized that the fate he had expected wasn't his fate after all.

Sora flicked off the cigarette lighter and tossed it into Riku's lap. He then stared off into space for what seemed like hours. Riku, though relieved that Sora wasn't about to kill him, was in immense pain from the car crash and couldn't seem to locate his cell-phone.

"Sora…?" He asked timidly. The brunette didn't seem to here his voice and continued to stare into nothingness.

"Sora…are you…okay?" Riku asked again, hoping his wording would bring the boy out of this state. It was of no use for the boy remained silent.

"Sora please talk to me." Riku pleaded to the silent teen.

"What do you want me to say Riku…?" Sora asked quietly, not looking up from where he was staring.

"I…was just worried..." Riku said biting his lip against the throbbing pain in his head.

"No one worries about me." Sora stated simply.

Riku looked over at the teen sadly. "I'm sorry." Was all he could say. Riku didn't know exactly why he was saying it. He _never_ said his sorry to _anyone _and here he was saying it to the one person he hated most. Maybe it was fear, but deep down, it felt like compassion.

A minute of silence passed over the two teens, each of them lost in their own thoughts. Sora was the first to break the silence with a swift kick to the passenger door. The door flung open and fell to the ground in a crumpled mess. Sora then jumped out of the car as if he hadn't a scratch on him. Riku glanced over curiously and then fearfully as he suddenly got the notion that Sora might just leave him out here. Riku was about to call out to the boy who had disappeared out of nowhere when he felt the drivers seat door open.

"Do you think anything's broken?" Sora asked quietly, looking Riku over.

"I think so…" Riku answered nervously.

"I don't want to move you but with the gas leaking, I think it's our only choice." Sora said bending down and wrapping on arm around Riku's shoulder. Riku held back any sounds of pain as Sora half dragged half carried him over to a large rock near the base of the hill.

"Thanks…" Riku said barely above a whisper. Sora didn't answer but sat down on the ground and buried his head in his arms.

Riku sighed and winced in pain. He was becoming very light-headed and dizzy and felt as if he were about to pass out.

"Sora…?" He started, looking over at the brunette. Sora once again didn't answer but seemed to have read his mind. Pulling out his cell phone, Sora dialed the three digit emergency number.

Both boys heard the person across the line asking questions that neither answered. Sora merely placed the cell phone on the ground and closed his eyes. He knew they would send the police so why bother answering questions.

After the call was made, silence was heard once again. Sora was busy staring of into the distance while Riku was trying his best not to pass out. After fifteen minutes passed, sirens were heard in the distance. It was a great relief for both boys.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora…?"

"Yeah?" Said boy asked, keeping his gaze locked on the little bird on Riku's windowsill.

"Why do you stare out the window at nothing?" Riku asked studying the boy. He'd been staring out the window for at least forty five minutes and Riku had tired of reading his magazine so he decided to ask the boy a few questions.

"It's not nothing. Don't you see the world out there…?" Sora asked more to himself than to Riku.

"I see lots of snow." Riku said simply. '

"Snow isn't nothing."

"But it's boring."

"It's only boring if you can't see the meaning of it." Sora stated turning to face the silver haired boy who had been confined to his bed for the rest of break.

"Then you're boring." Riku muttered playing with the hem of his sheets.

"And you're an idiot." Was the other boys stark reply.

Riku rolled his eyes and picked up his magazine. Usually he would be furious if Sora had said something to that effect before, but now it just didn't matter. After coming so close to losing his life twice, Riku wasn't going to risk it again. Something had changed that night. His hatred towards Sora had disappeared so quickly it felt as if he had never hated him before. Maybe it was the fact that the other boy nearly killed him. Or maybe it was the fact that the other boy saved him. He didn't quite know right now.

Sora having turned back to the window drew in a large sigh. He hated Riku. There were no words to describe the immense hatred he felt towards Riku and his parents. He despised them. Loathed them. Detested them. But hatred was odd thing, for no matter how much he told his mind that he hated Riku, his heart didn't. Not after he heard him say the words he had so longed to hear from a human.

_I'm sorry_

His mind kept telling him he should've ended his life that night. He should've taken Riku's too. He should've proved to the world that he existed, that he was capable of so much more. But killing himself and his foster brother wouldn't prove a thing. It would only prove that he was a good for nothing boy like everyone told him he was. He would _never _be what they wanted him to be.

Thinking back Sora didn't know why he didn't drop the lighter. He wasn't sure what pulled him out of his hysteria. However he knew one thing. He'd be leaving behind the few things that had made him happy. He'd be leaving his brother whom he'd just recently found out was alive; he'd be leaving his crush Kairi, his beloved parental figure Aeris and his caring teacher Tifa. He'd be leaving behind the little girl in the park, his memories, and his little blonde haired friend from so long ago. It wouldn't seem like much to an outsiders mind, but to Sora these things meant the world. He'd be a coward to take the easy way out and prove to everyone he was exactly what he didn't want to be.

"Aren't you going to…do anything?" Riku asked curiously. He'd never taken the time to wonder about what Sora did for fun, he had always been thinking about himself and his social life that was probably ruined now.

"No. I have nothing to do." Sora replied fiddling with his bracelet.

"What do you…like to do?" Riku asked blushing at his question. He'd lived with this boy for ten years yet he didn't know a thing about him. He felt so stupid.

"I like to draw. I have for awhile." Sora said simply.

"Can I see them?" Riku asked nervously.

Sora raised his eyebrows in question but stood up and left the room. A minute later he reappeared with one of his sketchbooks. He tossed it onto Riku's lap and made his way back over to the window seat he was sitting in.

Riku slowly opened the cover of the black notebook and was shocked to find an image of himself and Sora on the first page. It was of them when they were little. They were outside on a play set, both smiling wide.

"When…when was this?" Riku asked looking up into Sora's dark blue eyes.

"It was the second day after I came here. It's the only time I remember us having fun together."

Riku frowned and flipped the page. A picture of a blonde haired boy appeared looking a lot like Sora. "Who's he?" Riku asked.

"My brother." Sora said, seeing no use in hiding it.

"You had a brother?" Riku asked in surprise.

"Have a brother. He goes to our school. Name's Roxas."

"The new kid…" Riku said thinking back to the time Roxas punched him.

"Yeah…" Sora whispered turning back to the window.

"Why…why aren't you guys together then?" Riku asked, prodding for information.

"Cause he's supposed to be dead."

"Huh?"

"He was supposed to be dead along with my parents." Sora whispered.

"Oh…" Riku said quietly. No one had ever told him that Sora had a brother that was involved in the 'accident.'

"Even if he were alive then…we wouldn't have been put together." Sora said simply. "My aunt and uncle didn't want me…never liked me."

"I'm…" Riku started.

"Please…don't say it." Sora said quietly. "It's nothing to be sorry about."

"But-"

"Shut up Riku. You do not mean it." Sora said standing up. "Goodnight." He said walking out the door of the room leaving an upset Riku behind.

However he once again left his precious sketchpad behind of which Riku felt no guilt in looking through. Times are telling they say. He'd understand by tomorrow.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It's not like I stand up here alone. But the others are invisible making it cold. And I'll be walking down the hallway, looking at the sky, watch out I think today I'm going to die. Cause everybody's talking till I step in the room. And everybody's laughing till I open my mouth. And everybody's yelling when I smile at them. And everybody's charging as I leave the room. Tears are falling but who cares about rain, everybody laughs when they see it's full of salt. I know I'm a psycho, I know I'm a freak. Please don't tell me the truth though. I already know.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: Review responses I will now reply to via the reply to review area. I'm no longer posting them here because they take up too much space and time.

Thanks to all who have reviewed. Love you guys.

Peace


	28. Christmas: Friends, Foes, and Fools

A/N: Well…here I am again. School has gotten me down and I'm feeling pretty depressed most of the time…so yeah, that's why my updates aren't coming so fast. To answer anyone's questions on why I'm feeling this way, it's basically the pressure of school and fitting in. Lack of friends also (I really don't have any). Anyway, this chapter leads up to big fluff…basically what you all have been waiting for. And you know what you've been waiting for. Hope you all enjoy!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sometimes I wish I didn't feel this way. I wish my heart didn't miss a beat or my breath quicken till I couldn't breathe. I wish I didn't feel so sick and nervous when you're around. I honestly wish it all away. But then if I did I'd wish away one of the most important people in my life. I don't have many mind you. I wish I could know the truth. That it's not only me who feels this way. I'm living each day by the minute, hoping somehow I can know without knowing. I pray I'm not the only one who's on this rock. I need you standing next to me. I hope you know.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"You know we look ridiculous don't you?"

"Heck yeah, but who cares. It's good"

"I still don't understand the flavor of it though…"

"Meh, you never do."

The brunette's words were true, they did look ridiculous. Roxas and Sora were busy leaning against they side of Roxas's father's restaurant licking a strange Popsicle called sea salt ice cream. They were an odd looking pair and both of them knew it after seeing the long wary glances of Christmas shoppers. Not only did prep and goth not mix, but eating ice-cream outside in the dead of winter just didn't seem quite right.

"Life sucks." Sora said glaring at a snotty looking woman who was frowning at him from across the street.

"Tell me about it." Roxas said with a sigh. "I don't even feel the Christmas spirit."

Sora chuckled and licked his Popsicle. "Honestly, there is no such thing."

"I guess you're right." Roxas mumbled pulling at his baby blue beanie. "God I hate this weather."

"Really? I like it."

"Well duh, it fits you."

"Heck yeah."

"….So, what are you doing for the Holiday?" Roxas asked after a few seconds of silence.

"Nothing as usual. You?"

"I don't know." Roxas said quietly.

"Aren't you going to do something with that girl you like?" Sora asked thinking back to the time when Roxas mentioned his little 'crush'. Sora had been annoyed with his choice of a crush; Namine had never been nice to him.

"I don't know…I don't' think she likes me."

"…You're stupid." Sora muttered flicking his now bare Popsicle stick across the street. He chuckled evilly when it hit the snotty woman on the head.

"Huh?" Roxas asked questionably.

"Huh what? She likes you, idiot."

Roxas raised his eyebrows at this. "How do you know…?"

"I can tell…I tend to study the way people act when I'm bored. My drawings reflect it."

"Well then…do you think she knows I like her?"

"Um, no."

"Why?"

"Because you're so dang naïve no one would know."

Roxas rolled his eyes and flicked his Popsicle stick across the street which happened to hit a certain snotty woman in the face. "What should I do then?"

"Um…ask her out." Sora stated. "It's not that hard."

"Oh really? Then why don't you go ask Kairi out?" Roxas asked with a smirk.

Sora narrowed his eyes and blushed. "Because…It just wouldn't work." He said quickly.

"And why not?"

"Because…" Sora trailed off thinking of a good reason. "Because look at me." He finished, thinking of the first thing that came to mind.

"Man you're not that creepy. I mean come on, you look like a kid with pandas all over your beanie and you're flinging sticks at a mad woman. Seriously."

"…Yeah well you look like ditzy boy." Sora muttered lamely.

"Good one Sora." Roxas said sarcastically. "Now come now…"

"Okay fine, I'm shy okay?"

"Now you understand how I feel."

It was quiet for a few seconds until Sora flung a rock against the wall of a dumpster bin. "We need help."

"Heck yeah."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hey Kairi." Namine said quietly, giving the red head a small smile.

Kairi jumped and slowly turned to face the blonde girl. "H-hey…how are you?" She asked nervously, gripping her shopping bag to her side.

"I'm good, you?"

"Um perfect." Kairi said rubbing her arm nervously.

"Kairi…" Namine started with a sigh. "Can you please not act like I'm going to kill you every time you see me?"

"Well it's not my fault that you freak the heck out of me." Kairi said before thinking.

"Okay…yeah. I just want to be on good terms."

"I know I just…it takes awhile for me to um…loosen up."

"I can tell." Namine said with a smile. "What are you doing?" She asked switching the subject.

"I'm doing my Christmas shopping. Kind of late I know. What about you?"

"Oh I'm just…looking." Namine said smiling. She was always just looking now. Money was scarce.

Kairi nodded and loosened the grip on her bag. "Can I um…ask you something?" She asked nervously, not sure of what she was getting into.

"Sure." Namine said cheerily as the two began to walk towards nowhere in particular.

"I want to get someone…special…something for Christmas, but I'm not sure what to get."

Namine's face broke out in an evil grin. "Is this 'special' someone a guy…?" She asked slowly.

Kairi gulped and nodded which caused the older girl to grin even wider.

"Who is he?" Namine asked cutting to the quick.

"Um uh….well…I'd rather not tell because…well um, I don't know if he likes me."

"Ah okay. So why are you getting him something then?"

Kairi sighed and pulled at her hair. "I don't know…I mean I could give it to him as gift from a friend…"

"Yeah…but…" Namine said glancing at a shirt in the window of one of the stores she used to shop at. It took all her willpower not to run in there and steal it.

"Maybe I shouldn't." Kairi finished.

"What why?" Namine asked snapping back to the conversation at hand.

"I don't know…it would be…awkward."

"No it wouldn't. It'd be sweet and something might come out of it. What does he like?"

"He likes to draw."

"Hmm, that's too general. What else?"

"Uh…"

"Anything he ever said he wanted?" Namine asked thinking through this situation.

Kairi stopped and furrowed her eyebrows in thought. "I don't know…" She said quietly. "He doesn't talk much about what he wants."

"Hmmm…." Namine said, also stopping to think.

"Wait a minute…he has this necklace that needs a chain…" Kairi started before breaking into a smile. "I could get him a chain."

Namine smiled also. "Wow, that sounds cool. Oh and personal. Yeah." She said thinking about Kairi's idea.

"Yeah, I think that's what I'm gonna get him."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora, wait up!" A familiar shrieky voice was heard from behind said boy.

"Willa?" Sora asked turning around to see his little friends running to catch up with him.

"Yeah that's me." She said stopping to catch her breathe when she caught up.

"What are you doing out here?" Sora asked the girl, already knowing the answer.

"I wanted to say thank you." The girl said, showing him her little necklace that she was wearing. "My mom says thanks too."

Sora smiled despite himself. "No thanks needed."

"Look what I found." Willa said, pulling something out of her little pocket.

Sora held back a gasp when the six year old's hand reappeared with none other than Kairi's lucky charm. "Where'd you get that?"

"I found it on the ground." Willa said smiling. "It's mine now."

"Um…actually, that's my friend's charm." Sora said sheepishly.

"So?" Willa asked, placing the charm back into her pocket.

"It's important to her, she'll want it back."

"Wait…it's your girlfriend's?" Willa asked frowning.

Sora blushed and then frowned. "No, she's a friend."

"Well then she's not important so I can keep it."

Sora rolled his eyes and knelt down so he was eye level with the little girl. "Willa, that charm is really important to my friend. She's going to be really sad when she finds out its missing."

"If she liked it so much she wouldn't have lost it."

"Willa we all lose things that are important…it's an accident."

"But I want it." Willa said stomping her foot.

"We all have things we want Willa, give it up." Sora said impatiently.

"Why?"

Sora sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. "Look, why do you want to know?"

"Because, she's going to take my spot."

"What the heck?"

"She's gonna steal you!"

"Willa, nobody's taking me anywhere…"

"Yeah but…how old is she?"

"14."

"She's young."

"So are you."

"No I'm not!"

"Willa she's eight years older than you."

"I'm smarter and more mature. Age doesn't mean anything for me."

Sora groaned in annoyance. "This is pathetic."

"I know." Willa said smiling.

"Look could you just give me the charm."

"No." Willa said through an annoying smirk.

"…Why?"

"Because!" Willa yelled stomping her foot once again.

"Okay, what do I have to do to get that charm back?"

"Um….uh…be my boyfriend?"

"No." Sora said rolling his eyes. "You're too young."

"I'm not young you idiot!"

"Yeah okay, I get it. You're too…um…short."

"You're not tall yourself."

"You know what forget it." Sora said, turning away from the little girl, grinning because he knew she would beg him to come back. He however misjudged the little girls behavior.

"Yeah see you later." Willa yelled, walking away. Sora groaned and turned around when he noticed the little figure stomping off in the direction of her neighborhood. _Good lord…_

"Willa come back." Sora yelled, exasperated.

"Not unless I can be your girlfriend!" Willa yelled from across the street. A couple of people turned to watch this interesting feud among a goth kid and a six year old girl. It wasn't everyday you see something so completely ridiculous.

"Willa don't be stupid." Sora yelled back.

"I ain't!" The girl said throwing her head back and turning away.

Sora groaned and held back a cuss. Forget it. It was unfortunate for Kairi was really attached to that charm and he knew she'd miss it terribly. However he couldn't agree to something as ridiculous as being Willa's boyfriend. He'd be put in jail if the girl went around saying things like that. Or maybe people wouldn't believe her. Sora however wasn't going to risk it. He'd have to convince her to give it to him. Question was how in the world was he going to do that.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kairi smiled gleefully as she ran quickly up the stairs to her room. She'd bought Sora's chain and all it needed was the gift wrapping. Namine had said she'd help her with it of which Kairi was eternally grateful. Saying she couldn't wrap a present to save her life was a major understatement.

Kairi giggled nervously at the thought of giving it to her crush. She hoped with all her heart he'd accept it and maybe, just maybe, something else would come out of this. Kairi

Kairi reached into her purse to find her cell phone to call Namine when she noticed something very important was missing. Looking into her purse, Kairi was filled with a sense of dread when she realized her most precious possession, her lucky charm, was missing. She quickly overturned the purse and dumped out its contents in hopes that it was buried beneath other items. To her dismay it wasn't there.

"Where could it be?" Kairi said to herself, panicking when she dumped out everything in her shopping bag. She spent the next half hour frantically searching her room and even her half sibling's rooms. The charm however was nowhere to be found. After coming to the sad conclusion that she had indeed lost her charm, Kairi felt her eyes grow hot. She knew this was babyish and that most people wouldn't cry over these things, but the charm was so important to her. It was almost a part of her. It hurt so much to have it go missing. A here today she thought was wonderful. Why did all good things come to an end?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I wish I could be a perfect person. That someone who won't ever let you down. That someone who's never screwed up, who's always around. I wish I wasn't so scared of myself. I wish I wasn't such a coward. I wish I could be more than me. I wish I could be beyond better. But maybe somehow you'll like the real me. 'Cause you know I love the real you. I'd accept you if you were swallowed in the dark. 'Cause I know you'd find a way out. I know I'm not perfect, I hope you can see past that. Because I know you're not perfect, but all I can see is past that.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: Yeah…the last endpoint was so sappy…-cough- anyway, hope you enjoyed! I have no idea when the next chapter will be out…maybe two weeks, I don't know. Hopefully sooner.

Love you guys.

Peace.


	29. Riku's Charm aka I Don't Forgive You

A/N: Hey there…new chapter. :-) Thanks for the encouragement guys, I really appreciate it. It means a lot. I'd like to thank Malcolm Yuy, Creativedreamer48 (sure I'll message you sometime soon), Isler, Aki, Kimitala, DreamedSong Ninja-fox-chan, Alantie Mistaniu, snowyleopard, and aquired.minds, for the encouraging reviews. Thanks a lot guys!

And for the rest of my reviews, thanks so much for reviewing!

On another note, I recently said I was going to have 7 or less more chapters…I might add a couple of more seeing how the pace of this story is going. Just wanted to let you know.

Anyways, on to the story!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A bit of luck and we may have thought this thing through. I learned that words can't always be true. You can change as much as you like. I'm not ever going to buy your lies. Your face can change but your heart cannot. Don't think I'm fooled by your frown.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Mom!"

"What?"

"I wanna go outside." Riku whined, pouting as his mother poked her head into the room.

"Absolutely not." The strict woman said, kicking some of Riku's things out of her way. "You'll catch your death.

"But Mom!" Riku whined sulking in his bed. "I'm so bored." He stated, grimacing at the sound of his own voice. Ever since the accident he detested acting younger than he was, however, he wanted to get out of his stuffy room so bad and was willing to do anything to get his wish granted.

"I don't care." The woman said sitting on the edge of his bed.

Riku pouted and pulled out the puppy dog face that he hoped his mother would buy. He started cheering in his head when his mother sighed annoyed.

"Ugh, fine. Where do you want to go?"

"I don't know…" Riku said thinking. "Um, the park?" He asked, thinking of know better alternative.

"Fine." The woman sighed pulling back Riku's sheets. It was going to take awhile before they got there what with all of Riku's complications from the accident.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Riku sighed happily while watching two little chipmunks fight over a piece of bark. It was so pointless yet amusing at the same time. His mother however was not amused and was growing aggravated by the minute.

"Oh my gosh, Riku, I can't stand it." The woman yelled after a few minutes of silence.

"Why? You don't like nature?" Riku asked, looking over at his mother.

Riku's mother rolled his eyes. "Like you do?" She asked sarcastically.

"Well I don't know….I kind of find it nice now."

"Whatever, I'm going to the mall. Call me when you need me."

Riku sighed sadly as he watched his mother walk away. She never wanted to stay with him long; she was always shopping, always away. Riku could honestly say for the first time in his life that he was dead lonely. None of his friends were talking to him, he'd called them but they hadn't called back. Sora still hated him. He now knew exactly why after looking at his shocking and somewhat horrifying sketchbook. And his father was never around. He was always busy at work.

"Hi."

Riku raised his head up from the ground to meet the eyes of a little girl. His immediate instinct was to frown and tell her to beat it, but, he decided against that for some unknown reason and actually gave a small smile.

"I'm Willa." The girl said simply.

"Hey." Riku said, hoping she would go away and leave him alone.

"What's wrong with your leg?"

"I broke it." Riku said looking down at the cast on his leg.

"How?"

"Accident." Riku said trying not to snap at the kid. "Look, what do you want?"

"I just wanna talk." Willa said, plopping herself down on the bench beside Riku.

"Well I don't want to." Riku said rolling his eyes.

"I don't give a crap what you want." The girl spat kicking the cast on his leg.

Riku yelped and glared at the little girl. "What the heck was that for?!"

"I don't like you."

"Well ok then." Riku muttered, rubbing his leg.

"You're a mean bastard." The girl spat.

Riku raised his eyebrows at this. "Kid where are your parents?"

"Dad's gone, Mom's at work."

"Oh…." Riku muttered, not expecting that answer. "Ok um…why are you mad at me?"

"You look full of yourself. Rich."

Riku frowned and rubbed his hands together. "So what if I am?"

"Then you should rot in hell."

"What…?"

"Rich people don't like me…I used to have a rich friend."

"Okay…so what happened then?"

"He doesn't like me anymore…he didn't want to be my boyfriend."

Riku rolled his eyes in annoyance. "You're too young to have a boyfriend."

"No I'm not!"

"How old are you?"

"…Six…"

"Right. How old was he, 10?"

"He's 16."

Riku held back a laugh and turned away so the girl wouldn't see his face. "Kid, he's ten years older than you."

"I know but…I like him."

"Don't you like anyone your own age?"

"No, they laugh at me." Willa said playing with a star shaped charm in her hand.

"Why do they laugh…?" Riku asked, looking over at the little girl. Usually he wouldn't give a crap about the feelings of the girl, but this kid was making him feel…compassionate?

"I don't have money or nice clothes…this is all I have that's really nice." Willa said pulling out the necklace Sora had given her.

Riku raised his eyebrows at the diamond necklace. "Where'd you get that…steal it?"

"No!" The girl yelled, clutching the necklace. "My friend got it for me."

"Who's this 'friend'?" Riku asked curiously. _What idiot would give a six year old a necklace worth thousands of dollars...he obviously has money._

"His name's Sora…"

Riku chocked back a gasp. Sora? He only knew one Sora and the one he knew couldn't possible be so…giving. "S-Sora…what does he look like?"

"He wears dark clothes, but he's prettier than you."

Riku frowned at this statement. _Stupid kid, I'm prettier than Sora. _Riku thought before mentally kicking himself. He was indeed not 'pretty'.

"So…Sora…gave this to you?"

"Yes, but he wanted to take this charm."

"Why's that?"

"I don't know, he said something about a girl and it being her lucky charm." Willa said glaring at the ground at the mention of 'the girl.'

Riku furrowed his eyebrows in thought. What girl could Sora possibly like so much as to get back her lost charm? Riku ran through the long list of girls at his school and landed on then decided on the one he thought the charm belonged to. Kairi was the girl.

Riku thought back to the time were the connection was made.

"_She has a star shaped lucky charm…she carries it around everywhere."_

"Willa…why do you want the charm?" Riku asked after a few seconds.

"So that girl can't have it back." Willa stated fiercly. After she said this her face softened into a sad frown. "And so I can have a lucky charm to give to a boy." She finished quietly.

Riku resisted the urge to roll his eyes and kept a straight face. "Okay…but don't you think the girl will want it back? It's probably important to her." Riku said quietly. He personally didn't know why he wanted to get the charm back, but he felt that it was his duty after all the crap he had put both Sora and Kairi in.

"I know…" Willa sighed, kicking her shoes against a pile of snow.

Riku thought for a few seconds about the situation. How could he possibly make this little girl give up the charm? He couldn't use force, hell no. He'd have to persuade her…or bribe her. Whatever way was the easiest.

"Hey Willa, what if I bought you a charm, would you give me this one?"

Willa furrowed her eyebrows in thought for a minute. "Can it be sparkly?" She asked finally, to Riku's relieve.

"Sure thing." Riku said smiling at the little girl. "You have to give me the charm first though."

Willa sighed and handed him the little star shaped trinket. "Now you have to keep your promise." She stated standing up.

Riku sighed annoyed and stood up, grasping his crutches. "Yeah yeah…" He muttered, starting off to the nearest jewelry store.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I just don't know where I might've left it." Kairi said sadly into the telephone.

"I know, maybe it'll just…pop up." Sora answered guiltly. Darn that Willa, he could've had the thing by now.

Kairi sighed into the phone. "Alright…I gotta go, my Mom's making me make dinner."

"Alright, I'll talk to you later, and don't worry about the charm, I'm sure you'll find it."

"I hope so. Goodnight."

Sora groaned and clicked his cellphone of, tossing it into a pile of clean clothes. "Why won't she just give the dang thing up…" Sora moaned into his pillow. He wasn't there for long for a knock was heard on his door.

"Riku, if that's you, stay the heck away from my door!" Sora yelled, throwing a pillow at the door.

"I have something to give you…" Riku said from outside the door.

"Whatever you have, I don't want it."

"But-"

"Leave me alone."

"But it has something to do with Kairi."

Sora frowned and lifted his head up from the pillow. Kairi? What did Riku know about him and Kairi?

"What do you mean, Riku."

"I have something that I think has something to do with Kairi, can I please just come in."

Sora, curious as to what Riku was talking about, told him he could enter. Riku limped in with his crutches and eyes the neat room he had rarely stepped into.

"Nice room." Riku said quietly, taking in the odd color choices.

"Whatever. What do you want?" Sora spat, sitting up from his bed.

Riku frowned and sighed a bit sadly. Sora still hated them. He expected it though. "Does this belong to Kairi?" Riku asked, pulling out Kairi's lucky charm.

Sora gasped and stood up from his bed quickly. "Where'd you get that?" He asked, snatching the item away from Riku.

"A little girl had it, I sort of bribed her to give it to me…"

"How did you know it was Kairi's?"

"I remember you saying something about it once."

Sora looked up at Riku and frowned. "Well I appreciate you giving it to me. You can leave now."

Riku bit his lip and nodded, half walking, half limping his way out of the room. He shuddered when he heard Sora slam the door behind him.

This situation wasn't ever going to get better, Riku assumed. Sora would always hate him and Riku knew he deserved it. For the first time since forever Riku felt a sense of hatred towards himself. The person he was was suddenly the person he didn't want to be.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Don't think you can try and make things right. Ten years and now you've suddenly seen the light. I hate you and I always will. The silver in your eyes hides the evil in your heart. I don't believe it when you say you're sorry. It was nice hearing it for once though. Go kill yourself and rot in hell. You don't mean nothing to me.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So yeah, sort of a Riku based chapter…hope you guys don't mind. Fluff is coming though.

Peace


	30. Lets Live For Now

A/N: So…here I am again with a new chapter….chapter 30…Woot. So anyway, this is a Sora/Kairi chapter…no other characters included. It's both fluffy and angsty. I hate this chapter to bits just to let you know. It's crap in my opinion, but to heck with it. Enjoy if you can.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I should've realized the truth in your eyes and the love in your heart. It seems so different now that we're apart. Give me five minutes and a reason for your reasoning. I'll give you an answer along with my love. Don't worry about the media and bystanders on the streets. One day they'll realize that appearances don't matter. Don't listen to the people who just can't understand. Cause when it's all said and done we're the ones who know who we are. They'll be the ones trapped on an island searching for the ocean. We'll be the ones up in the clouds floating on ice. Give me a reason for your reasoning and I might just give you the world. Cause I want the world to know about my special girl.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kairi was busy staring up at her plain white ceiling. It was Christmas Eve and she still hadn't gathered the courage to give Sora his Christmas present. Every time Kairi got even a tiny feeling of courage in her heart, it was shattered by the word that was plaguing her mind for the past few weeks. Rejection. She wouldn't be able to bare it if Sora didn't like her back.

"Kairi!"

"Yeah mom?" Kairi said, sitting up from her bed.

"Telephone!"

Kairi's face broke into a grin and ran down stairs. It was a rarity that she got a phone call from anyone and she relished the few that she got. Kairi took the cordless phone from her mom and walked back upstairs.

"Hello?"

"Hey Kairi, its Sora."

"Hi." Kairi said nervously. She sat down on her bed, waiting for Sora to continue.

"Um…how are you?" The equally nervous boy asked over the phone. Lately, the ease in their conversations was lessening.

"Good…good thank you." Kairi said gulping nervously.

"So um…I was just calling cause….well…I don't know…I kind of…have something to give to you." Sora said after much struggle.

"Oh really? I have something to give to you too." Kairi said quietly.

"So um…you want to meet somewhere…?"

"The beach, maybe?." Kairi said, hoping they wouldn't have to go somewhere crowded.

"Sure okay…see you at 8:00 then?"

"Yeah, I'll be there."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"It's pretty chilly, yeah?" Kairi said softly, sitting in the somewhat cold sand.

"Yeah…yet the ocean doesn't freeze." Came Sora's equally quiet reply.

Kairi nodded and fiddled with the hem of her jacket. She felt so nervous right now for some reason. This was her last chance to give Sora his present and Kairi was determined to even though she was scared to death to do it.

"…Kairi?"

"Yeah?" Kairi said looking over at the dark clothed boy. It was silent for a few minutes and Kairi began to wonder if Sora had forgotten what he was going to ask her.

"Do you….do you see the same colors I do?" Sora said looking at the moon shining over the ocean.

"Huh?" Kairi asked confused.

"Do you see the same things…or am I abnormal." Sora stated the last half more to himself than to Kairi.

Kairi sighed and pulled her knees up to her chest. "You're not abnormal Sora…" She started, thinking about what she should add to this. "You just think you are because…because you won't let anyone inside. If you don't let people inside your heart….your mind…you'll never think of yourself as normal."

Sora bit his lip and pulled at a lock of his spiky hair. "That's because I'm not."

"Sora…" Kairi stated sadly, looking up into the stars. "You can't live a normal life when you live in a hellhole."

Sora lifted his eyes and looked over at the red-head. "You don't know what my life's like."

"I know things aren't right at home. I know you hate yourself and want to die…that's about as much as anyone should know."

"Don't you try and lecture me about myself!" Sora yelled angrily.

"Somebody has to point it out, Sora. There going to kill you unless you kill yourself first!" Kairi yelled back at him. "It's stupid, Sora. It's stupid. You're one of the smartest people I know yet in this situation you're an idiot!"

Sora glared at Kairi and stood up. "What would I do then, Kairi? Huh? Just up and leave?" He yelled, backing away from her. "Nobody wants a murderer in their home Kairi…I deserve it all." He finished barely above a whisper.

Kairi's eyes widened at his words. Murderer? What did that mean? Sora wasn't a murderer. He was too kind for that. Although he didn't show it much, Sora cared greatly for other people. Murder…it was unspeakable.

"Sora!" Kairi yelled, standing up and running to catch up to the dark figure.

Sora didn't answer but stopped at the edge of the beach where the sand meets the water.

"What do you mean Sora…?" Kairi asked, standing behind him.

_When the winds whisper, call my name,_

_Because I'm not the one to blame,_

_My actions are those of hate,_

_My mind albeit couldn't wait, _

The world was quiet for the next few minutes. All that was heard was the water rushing up to kiss the golden, cold sand, and then roll back in embarrassment. The wind was rustling the few leaves on the paupu trees barren of their usual fruit. It would've been peaceful and romantic without the heavy tension in the air.

_I'm wishing I was lying dead,_

_I killed him yet I'm the one who bled,_

_I was too young to know the truth,_

_Six years was the last of my youth,_

The wind blew a heavy gust across the lazy quiet beach. Despite the hoodie, Sora shivered under its arms. One drop of salt water fell onto the beach. Then it was followed by another, and then one more. Before he knew it it was raining on the sand in front of him.

_Please don't watch me end it all_

_Heaven says it's time to fall,_

_Hold my hand till it burns away,_

_Because god says it's time to pay,_

Kairi blinked as she saw the crystal rain drops fall from Sora's face onto the sand. Before she could stop herself, she wrapped her arms around Sora's waist from behind. It wasn't out of her crazed love for him, it was out of compassion; the need to fix what is broken.

_I asked for a death wish and it was granted,_

_In itself my life was planted,_

_Please accept my woeful plea,_

_I'm not what I'm supposed to be,_

"Whatever you did…whatever you've done…whatever it is that you feel you have to hide, wash it all away." Kairi said simply into Sora's shoulder. "I won't love you any less." She finished with a sigh. Her secret was out and it actually felt okay.

_Why don't you hate me like they do?_

_You don't know what I've been through,_

_Yet you can see deep down inside,_

_From you there's nothing I can hide,_

Kairi pulled a small box out of her pocket and put it into Sora's hand. "Open it." She said simply, pulling her hand away from his. Sora looked at the small gift wrapped box and then slowly untied the ribbon. Pulling away the lid, he couldn't help but smile despite the tears.

"You got me a chain." He said quietly, pulling the thick silver chain out of the box. It was obviously expensive, showing that Kairi cared a lot about him. No, loved him.

"Memories shouldn't be held on your sleeve…they should be in your heart." Kairi said simply, pulling the crown shaped charm off of Sora's wrist. "On top of it is the closest you can get with material things though…"

Sora smiled and took the crown from Kairi and slipped it onto the chain. Kairi smiled back and blushed despite herself. "I know it's Kairi's rambling was stopped short when she felt herself being crushed in Sora's arms. Kairi blushed deeper, but didn't pull back. It felt just right. Just perfectly right.

"Thank you." Sora said softly into her auburn hair. "You just made everything so simple."

Kairi didn't understand what he was saying but she sure did understand what came next. Sora pulled back slowly from Sora and before she knew it he had his lips directly on hers. Kairi nearly melted into a puddle right then and there.

_For ten years I thought I was the only one,_

_They had the whole and I had none,_

_But now I know that someone cares,_

_And now I can wash away these tears,_

It wasn't accepted. It couldn't be love. Others would laugh and others would be angry. This wasn't how the world worked. These two people shouldn't be together, they shouldn't even know each other. Yet the two teenagers finally realized that washing away all the laughter and hate was necessary. Neither of them was thinking about their issues. Her shyness, low self esteem, and feeling inferior, his anger, hatred, and self loathing. Tonight the world was silent. Tomorrow it would be back to the old ways. Tonight they'd live for the moon and cry when the sun rises. It was just so simple.

Sora broke away from the soft, amateur kiss and blushed madly. "Um…yeah…I got something for you too." He said quietly, shakingly searching his pocket for something.

Kairi, still a bit lost in a daze, stared off into nothingness with a lovesick smile on her face.

"Kairi?" Sora asked, lifting her chin to face him.

"Oh um, yeah?" Kairi said, smiling awkwardly. "Hehe…sorry…"

"It's okay." Sora stated, pulling out a little box about the size of Kairi's. "Now it's your turn."

Kairi blushed and opened the little box hesitantly. "…if this is too expensive…" Kairi said slowly.

"You deserve expensive." Sora said, not allowing her to finish her sentence. "Open it up." He said a bit excitedly.

Kairi blushed a deeper shade of red and lifted the box lid. Kairi's eyes widened and she gasped loudly at the sight.

"M-my…m-my charm…?" Kairi said shakily, touching the little charm.

Sora smiled sheepishly. "I don't deserve all the credit in finding it…"

Kairi smiled and took the charm out of the box. When she did this she noticed a shiny gold chain attached to it. Little diamonds lined the delicate chain making the charm look as if it were shining.

"I-it's….it's so beautiful." She said, lifting it up to put it around her neck.

"No, let me." Sora said, taking the necklace away from Kairi. Kairi only nodded and blushed a deeper red as Sora placed the necklace around her neck, making the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end.

"I knew it would look nice as a necklace." Sora said softly, moving his hands back to his side.

Kairi only leaned in and gave him a tight hug. "Thank you so much…" She whispered, trying her best not to cry like a baby. "This charm…it means the world to me."

Sora only smiled and leaned down, sitting them both on the sand. It was silent for awhile, both teens enjoying the quiet stillness of the night. Kairi was lost in the feeling of pure bliss while Sora was feeling that and another feeling. Guilt.

"Kairi…?" Sora said, looking down at the red head in his arms.

"Hmm?" Kairi said absentmindedly playing with her necklace.

"I…you shouldn't like me." Sora started. "I've done things that are…unforgivable."

"I told you Sora…whatever you've done, just let it go. Start over." Kairi said, sitting up.

"I…can't seem to forgive myself…" Sora said staring out at the water.

Kairi nodded while reaching out to take Sora's hand. "Some things we can't start to forgive without letting it out. You can't hold it inside forever Sora."

Silence was again heard throughout the beach. It was midnight, and almost everyone except these two teens and blonde couple were still awake. The water was forever making its presence known, the same as the wind. It was peaceful. It was cleansing. It was a safe place to repent.

"When…when I was five…almost six, my family was killed at my house. I thought that they all died but…turns out my brother, Roxas, is still alive." Sora started. "That night…when I heard the gunshots…I went mad. The man…my birth father, I shot him."

Kairi's eyes were wide in shock, her heart beating rapidly. "Oh my god…that's horrible." She whispered, clenching Sora's hand tighter. L

Sora nodded and licked his lips. "Turns out my mother was having an affair…me and Roxas weren't my 'Father's' kids…I guess he thought that killing them would get him my mom's fortune…that's why I'm still alive. I was his ticket to the money. When Roxas and I turn 18 we'll inherent the money." Sora chuckled dryly. "We'll be millionaires."

The ocean waves crashed against the sand, sending sprays of water into the teen's faces. Yet neither of them cared.

"Well my dad's co-president was Riku's father…he was also my father's good friend. After the accident, the media was wondering who was going to get me…nobody wanted me of course. Then out of nowhere Riku's parents decided to take me in as a foster child. The press went wild with this. Riku's parents where called saints and the nicest people on the world because who would take in a 'murder-kid'…" Sora looked down at his hands and held back tears. "They didn't want me though…they prove that to me with their hatred…their hatred that comes out in the form of punching and slapping. Life's been the same for ten years…"

Kairi stared off into the ocean. Her thoughts were running wild as she tried to digest this news. She was right about Sora and what was going on at his home, but she had never expected all of this. It was almost unreal.

"We cannot visit the past…but the future, we can change. You can't live with them anymore…" Kairi said quietly. "You can't live in a place you're not safe in."

Sora bit his lip and rubbed his hands against Kairi's. "Where else am I to go? I should just wait it out till I turn 18."

"No." Kairi said, shaking her head. "You can't. Look what they're doing to you Sora." Kairi said pulling back the sleeve of his hoodie to reveal the rows of messy scars. "You won't last two more years."

Sora looked down at his arms and sighed. "You're right…I won't…but please, not now. I don't want to be sad right now."

Kairi frowned but nodded. "Not now, but not never." She stated wrapping her arms around Sora's frame.

"Right now let's just be happy…" She said. "Let's not think about the past or the future…let's think about now."

_Lets live for now. _

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

If only you knew how much your words mean to me. They're like gold in my heart of glass. You take the breath right out of me. Please don't give it back, I like the way it feels. Tomorrow I face the world and its people. Tomorrow I face myself. But tonight it's me and my angel. Let's be alright with that. Let the world find fault in that.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N:...I'm not really pleased with this chapter…meh, oh well. It's the best I can do for now. I'm dead busy and not in a good mood lately so yeah. Hopefully you guys will like it.

Peace


	31. Love Doesn't Make Life Disappear

A/N: Hehe, well long time no see….hey again. Sorry for the massive break between chapter updates (About a month I think) I've been buried in school lately so that's why I haven't updated (And I didn't know what I was going to do for this chapter until two days ago….I had writer's block.) Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter and please review (If anyone still reads this story…-cough-).

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

And they say the brighter the color the brighter the shine. But half the world is dying while gold shines on above. I like it when it's black outside. When the only shine we get is from the quiet stars. The stars don't hide the sky like the clouds. And the moon doesn't burn the earth like the sun. But yet the world is evil when the stars shine and the moon plays its tune. I guess we hate what is perfect and try to make it black. That's why the night sky is like a black paper speckled with sand. But you see, no matter how dark the sky may get, we'll always have the stars. It's impossible you see, so don't be afraid of shining through. You're not the only one up there who stands out from the rest.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Yo Riku man, what happened to ya?"

"Uh…accident over break." Riku said simply, limping into his math classroom the first day back to school. He grimaced as he tried to maneuver his crutches around the closely seated desks.

"…how?" A cheerleader asked, looking as if she wanted to eat Riku in his 'frail' state.

"Driving…lost control." Riku answered a bit put off by the female. "I don't want to talk about it guys."

"Dude you lost your license months ago." A boy from across the room said, ignoring Riku's wishes. The class started murmuring at this.

"Yeah well I made a mistake." Riku snapped, tossing his silver hair from his eyes. "It's none of your business."

"Is it on your record man?" Wakka asked, another student refusing to abide by Riku's wishes.

"I don't know." Riku mumbled. He honestly had no idea how many things he had on his record at the moment.

"Jeez man, why are you so angry?" A student from across the room asked the silver haired teen.

"I'm not okay? I just want to be left alone." Riku said firmly, trying not to lose control of his voice. Sitting down in his desk, Riku hid his eyes with his silver locks avoiding the gazes of the people he used to consider friends. His desk had a clear view of the hallway outside of the classroom door and he used this as a distraction from the annoying whispers.

Riku frowned sadly when he saw Kairi and Sora appear in his view. Kairi had her hand grasped in Sora's and was smiling while blushing at the same time. Sora's face was its usual blank expression however Riku noted the way Sora's hand tightly held Kairi's meaning he truly had feelings for the red-head.

"Kairi come on…you have to go to class." Riku heard Sora say.

"I know I just…" Kairi said nervously.

"It's only an hour." Sora said quietly. "And we have art and biology together…"

"I know….I sound stupid, don't I?" Kairi said after a moment.

"Naw…" Sora said lifting the corners of his mouth up into a small smile before giving her a hug. "See you later."

Kairi blushed and stumbled into her math class. Upon realizing that Riku was staring at her, she quickly straightened up and made a mad dash to the back of the room. Riku held back a chuckle and sighed. A flood of guilt ran through him as he thought back to the night he had pranked Kairi. It felt so wrong now that he thought about it.

"_I'm such a bastard…" _Riku thought to himself, doodling in the corner of his notebook. _"I'm such a sick twisted bastard…"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hey Sora, haven't seen you in awhile." Roxas said, walking up to his brother as they made their way to their art class.

"Heh….yeah, I've been sort of busy." Sora said, looking down to hide his blush that appeared out of nowhere.

"Really?" Roxas started, "What do you mean by 'busy'?"

"Honestly Roxas, you already know." Sora said quietly, speeding up his pace.

"No really Sora, I don't." Roxas said speeding up with a smirk on his face. As they turned a corner, Roxas noticed a group of his friends hanging out near his locker.

"Hey guys, what's up?" Roxas said, smiling at his friends. Sora bit his lip and stood behind Roxas wanting to get away from the group of people Roxas considered his friends.

"Nothing much…" One of them said, eyeing Sora. "So you're hanging with the gothic shithead now, huh?"

Sora grimaced and turned away but Roxas grabbed his arm and pulled him back forcefully.

"Yeah, is there a problem with that?" Roxas snapped. Sora looked at him and pushed his hand away from his arm.

"See you later…" He murmured stepping away before Roxas could grab his arm again. Roxas frowned as he watched his brother walk away from him. Turning back to his friends, he saw them snickering and making offhanded comments.

"What was that all about?" Roxas snapped angrily at them.

"What do you mean…?" One of the asked, playing with a piece of his hair.

"What's wrong with him?" Roxas asked, narrowing his eyes at his friends. "I can understand if you don't like him but-"

"Roxas, you're obviously new. Nobody messes with Sora. He's a loser." A girl said matter of factly. "You mess with him, you're going to either get killed by him or killed by one of the guys that beat him up." The others in the group nodded in agreement.

"Sora's not going to kill you." Roxas snapped angrily. "He just has problems."

"Yeah well rumor has it he's killed someone. I heard it was his dad or something." The girl spoke up again. The others in the group nodded once again.

"What…?" Roxas said quietly. "Are you being serious…?"

"We wouldn't lie, Roxas. Don't mess with that kid." The girl said before heading off to her classroom followed by the rest of Roxas's friends.

Roxas frowned being a little shocked at what they had said. Sora killing someone? No, deep down he was too nice. Roxas put the thought out of his head and walked off in the direction of his classroom. However, the little thought bugged him all through class.

Maybe they were right?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Kairi…you know you're going to fail this project if you don't stop daydreaming." Sasha, one of Kairi's classmates, said quietly, nudging Kairi. Kairi sighed and pulled her eyes away from the window of her art classroom and yawned.

"I know I know…I just really don't want to be here." She said quietly, picking up her pencil. "And for the life of me I can't get your nose right!" She snapped at herself, breaking the pencil in one hand.

"Honestly Kairi, almost nobody can get noses right…just do your best."

The class had been assigned to draw someone's portrait using only two colors: Blue and Yellow. None of the students felts as if this project was important and all of them found it to be a pain in the butt because the yellow pencil didn't appear to be showing on the yellowish paper. Kairi had been assigned to draw Sasha and Sasha had been assigned to draw Kairi for this project. However, Kairi's mind was nowhere near focused on this project and both were probably going to fail because of it.

Kairi sighed and grabbed another pencil. "Okay…I'm focused. I'm almost done…" She said quietly to herself. Glancing up she looked over at Sora and blushed. He had already finished sketching his assigned classmate and was idly doodling in one of his notebooks waiting for class to be over. Kairi let out a yelp when Sora suddenly looked up and gave her a small smile. Blushing she turned back to her sketch, feeling a bit embarrassed after being caught peeping.

After class was over, Kairi ran over to Sora and smiled awkwardly. Sora chuckled and gave her a quick hug which caused several of the students in the room to stop and stare. Sora, however, ignored this and dragged Kairi out of the room before they could start talking.

"God…I want to beat the smirks out of their faces…" Sora muttered once outside of the classroom.

Kairi giggled and grabbed his hand. "You get too upset." She said quietly. "But yeah, It would be nice."

Sora smiled softly but it was soon replaced with a frown and then a look of dread as he noticed a group of Riku's friends approaching him from out of the corner of his eye. Sora knew that this wouldn't be good by the looks the boys were giving him. They hadn't beaten him up in about three weeks. It was way past due.

"Hey Kairi, I'll meet up with you later, okay?" Sora said quickly, "I think I'm going to skip lunch."

"But why…?" Kairi asked looking hurt. She felt as if Sora didn't want to be seen with her.

"I just um…I have something to do and I'll see you in bio."

"But…" Kairi started, but then stopped. "Okay…bye." She said quietly, not trying to put up a fight with him. She couldn't help but feel hurt by his words though.

Sora sighed as he saw Kairi enter the cafeteria, as soon as the door closed behind her though he felt himself being smashed into a locker. Sora gasped against the lockers but forced himself to pull away before Wakka's fist slammed into his stomach once again.

"Long time no see, ya?" Wakka said smirking at Sora's pain laced face.

"Leave me alone, Wakka." Sora said quietly, forcing himself to stand up straight despite the searing pain in his stomach that was spreading throughout his chest.

"I think not ya little shit. You see I haven't seen you in about, hmm three weeks ya? Don't you miss me?" Wakka said smiling wickedly as he grabbed Sora arm and twisted it behind his back. Sora gasped and bit his lip, tears threatening to fall down his face.

The pain was almost unbearable and was getting worse if it was even possible. Wakka was slowly twisting Sora's arm making the pain heighten at every movement. It was like torture. Sora felt as if he was going to pass out from the pain when suddenly it stopped.

"Wakka back off." Came Riku's quiet voice. Wakka pulled away from Sora but slammed his shoulder against the lockers to keep him from running away.

"Oh you've gotta be kiddin' me man." Wakka said chuckling. His friends that had surrounded him and Sora also chuckled, thinking Riku was playing a joke.

"No…I mean it. Back off." Riku said, limping over to Wakka and staring him straight in the face.

Sora who had been watching all of this frowned angrily at Riku. "I can fight my own fights Riku." He snapped, using all his strength to shove Wakka's hand off his shoulder.

"I'm trying to help." Riku said simply, his face showing genuine concern. However this only angered Sora more.

"I don't need your help. You're just like the rest of them." Sora said angrily.

"Well if you can fight your own fights then, let's fight ya?" Wakka said through a smirk, throwing Sora once again against the lockers. Sora yelped and grabbed his shoulder, tears springing to his eyes.

"Wakka don't touch him again!" Riku yelled shoving his friend against the locker.

"Why not huh? Why the sudden change man? Getting' soft, ya?" Wakka said through cruel chuckles.

"No…he's my foster brother." Riku said after a moment. "He may not be my real brother but we still share something...if you touch him again I'm taking you out."

"What the hell?!" Wakka yelled, looking back and forth between the two. The other boys watching also started murmuring loudly.

Sora grimanced and frowned. "Why the hell did you tell them that you idiot?!" He yelled at Riku, shoving him despite his injuries.

"'Cause it's the truth, Sora."

"So what, now your Mr. Nice guy…now your all for being kind? Now you want to be linked with me?" Sora yelled angrily. "Stop putting on a stupid show and be your old self!"

"I'm trying to change Sora, I'm not putting on a show." Riku yelled, angry that Sora wouldn't acknowledge this.

"Oh shut up! Just shut up, you fake-assed liar!" Sora yelled punching Riku square in the face. Before Riku could realize what was happening, Sora had jumped on top of him and was punching him while screaming f-you's all over the place.

After much struggle and Wakka coming in to help, Riku managed to push Sora off of him. After taking a few breaths, Riku stood up shakily and shoved Sora into the now beaten down lockers. "What the hell is wrong with you?!"

"What do you think Riku? You and your shitty friends beat me up all the time and now you're here trying to_ save_ my ass?" Sora spat punching him in the face again and kicking him into the lockers opposite the one he was leaning against. By now the kids in the cafeteria had heard about the fight and were floating in to watch it.

"Well wouldn't you rather me being nice?" Riku asked, swiping his hand across his face to stop the bloody nose he had.

"Hell no." Sora spat, grabbing Riku's shoulders and slamming him into the locker again. "I want you to get the hell out of my life!" He screamed slamming him into the locker again and again. Wakka, a bit scared of the goth boy now, stumbled down the hallway in the direction of the principle's office.

A few minutes later, the principle and several teachers were at the scene. The gym teacher quickly grabbed Sora and dragged him away from the scene while several other teachers went to help the fallen silver haired boy.

The majority of the crowd was either awestruck, happy, or terrified however they all put the scene out of their minds as the bell rang for class.

Two students, though, stood side by side, both with different feelings about the scene. One was a red-headed girl with tears running down her face. Another was a blond haired boy with a frown. While the other students thought it was merely a stupid fight erupting over a disagreement, these two knew otherwise. For the girl it was a crack. She knew that sooner or later the gothic boy would break. For the boy it was a sign. He now knew that something indeed wasn't right with the gothic boy.

Because who gets angry when someone tries to do you right?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I'll smile when you can't open your eyes. Your face and your actions disgust me. I don't mess with people who switch their moods in a minute. So don't try to prove me your innocence. I don't like to be cruel but let me put it simple. I hate you and you'll never get forgivness from me. I'll burn your apology with my wrath. Too bad you didn't think before you cut too deep. So go on and feel guilty while I get high. I'll spit in your face when they say that you're dead. That's what you get for making me see hell before I get there.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So…there we go. If you see any grammar or spelling mistakes know that I apologize for this. I'm rushing and I needed to get this in before I get buried with homework again. Again, sorry.

I don't know when the next chapter will be out; it was a struggle to get this one out. I think I have about 6 chapters left…I think (Though I don't know, maybe more). Anyways, thanks for reviewing everyone. 45 reviews for one chapter. Pretty amazing if you ask me. I love you guys!

Peace.


	32. Good Kids Gone Bad, Bad Kids Gone Good

A/N: Hey Hey, new chapter here. Hope you guys like. This chapter is a bit depressing…well it's really depressing. But stick with me, we should have some lighter chapters coming up real soon. : ) 

So…the story is finally winding down. Wow…it's been fun. Seriously. I'm most definitely doing a sequel on this…(-sniffs- I'm not ready to let it go.) Anyways, enough of my rambling. Enjoy the chapter!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It comes to times like these when we figure out that who we are is a stranger. It's like staring at a mirror and not knowing who's on the other side. It's times like these when we want nothing more to take a knife to our own heart. When no matter how hard we want to die we don't have the courage to take our own life. They suicide is the cowards way out. Sometimes I see it as bravery. A coward is one who cannot take his own life. Yet the world sends a warped message and life and death. So those who are strong enough to say goodbye are looked on as fools. Yet people don't know why they want to go. Everyone wants to get mad when someone kills themselves. Yet if they were still living, nobody would care. They only know you once you're gone. Keep flying high hero. I think you finally showed them.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"So what was that all about, huh?"

Sora looked up at the bored looking principle and opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out.

"So you're not going to talk, hmm?" The principle carried on, absentmindedly doing a crossword puzzle.

"I…I'm sorry." Sora said after a few seconds of silence. "I lost control and-"

"Oh I know what you did…just, why did you do it?" The principle interrupted, taking off his glasses and looking closely at the goth boy. "Why are you always causing trouble you little punk? Why'd you think it was smart to punch our richest student, hmm?"

"I don't know…" Sora said nervously. He knew where this was going for sure. HE was going to be sent home with suspension. It wasn't the suspension that bothered him though, it was facing Riku's parents after they heard about this incident.

"Of course you don't know. You're stupid, that's why." The principle said with a smirk. "You're just playing out your days in stupidity, then one day you're going to mess up and end up in jail…or dead."

Sora bit his lip and looked at his hands. These words meant nothing to him, he'd heard them all his life, it was the fear of his upcoming hell that was making him want to cry.

"Cause you know…little punks like you think you're all that. One day…oh, one day…I'll live to see you-"

"Look can you just send me home already!" Sora snapped, jerking his head up. The principle jumped a bit at his tone of voice and glared angrily.

"Sit back and shut up." The principle said through clenched teeth. "I'm not done yet."

Sora frowned and shakily sat back. The principle smirked, picking up the phone on his desk and in a smooth voice asked Sora what his home phone-number was. Sora reluctantly gave it to him and buried his head in his arms.

"Hello?" The voice of the other line, Riku's mother, was heard.

"Hello Ms. Wakayama this is Principle Lance."

"H-hello…is something wrong?" Riku's mother asked nervously.

"Oh no…well…maybe. You see Riku got into a fight today, don't worry, he didn't start it."

"Oh my god! Is he alright?! Who started it?! I'm going to sue that son of a-"

"Hold on Mrs. Wakayama, I'm not finished."

"Fine… but hurry up for god's sakes!" The woman on the other line yelled impatiently. The principle made a face, but smiled nastily when he looked at Sora's worried form.

"Well you see, your foster person started it…"

"Holy- You mean Sora…where the hell is that boy?!"

"He's right here Mrs. Wakayama…he started fighting Riku out of nowhere, it was absolutely ridiculous…I say he needs to be put in an institution."

Sora looked up long enough to flip the finger on the principle before burying his head back into his arms. Fighting wasn't worth it right now, he had to think up a way to escape getting killed.

"Ugh- No, he just needs to be sent to juvies…" Riku's mother started. "Anyway, send his ass home right this instant. My husband and I will deal with him. And make Riku stay with the nurse until I can come and get him."

"Yes Mrs. Wakayama, have a nice day." The principle said smiling. Riku's mother slammed the phone down without a farewell which wiped the smile off of the principles face.

"Well you heard her, go home." The principle said annoyed.

Sora stood up stiffly, and grabbed his messenger bag. Before he could exit the room, however, the principles spoke up.

"One more instance like this and I'm going to expel your ass, Sora. I don't want to see your face in this room again." The principle said quietly, picking up his newspaper.

Sora only frowned and stepped out of the room making his way to the front of the school. He could hear loud whispers and chattering from the students in the hall, all of them looking at him with fear, disgust or both.

Sora could only put their faces out of his mind and keep walking. Never before had the hall felt so long.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sora walked tentatively up to the front door of his house and pulled out his keys. It was silent all around and most people would take that as a good sign. Sora though knew what it meant. Silence was his enemy, it always there right before the noise.

Sora opened the door and stepped inside his house, bracing himself for what he knew was sure to come. The action was instilled in his brain. The arm flying out of nowhere. The searing hot pain and the white tiles that his eyes almost became level with. Then came the muffled screaming and yelling; words that used to hurt so bad but were now nothing. It was all just a cycle. It wasn't supposed to hurt anymore. But it always cut his heart.

It always happened like a daze. The images would float around his head like clouds. He couldn't hear the man's voice or see his hatred. He couldn't see the man's actions or see his odium filled eyes. He couldn't smell the blood that marred the shiny white tiles. He refused to feel these things. But he couldn't block one thing. His heart hurt, and no measure of outside actions could stop internal bleeding.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hey Riku man…I'm sorry for messin' with the kid." Wakka said quietly, sitting next to Riku in the nurse's office.

"Whatever…" Riku muttered, biting his lip as the nurse rubbed some alcohol over a cut on the side of his cheek. The woman looked annoyed and quickly left the room after doing the necessary "precautions."

"Is he…is he really your foster brother?" Wakka asked after a few seconds.

"I told you once, you heard me…"

"So you meant it?"

"…Yes." Riku gritted out.

"Why didn't you tell me before?" Wakka asked getting a bit angry. "We're best friends Riku man."

"Look…" Riku started but then stopped after realizing what he was about to say.

"What?" Wakka asked curiously. "What were you gonna say?"

"Nothing, man." Riku said after a few seconds. He absentmindedly played with the zipper of his hoodie, avoiding looking at his best friend.

"Come on man, tell me." Wakka said punching Riku in the arm. "Get on with it."

"No it's nothing."

"Yes it is, now tell me before I punch the shit out of ya." Wakka said angrily.

"I…I don't want to be involved with you and the guys anymore." Riku said quietly.

"What…?" Wakka asked, dropping the tough exterior and staring at his friend inquisitively.

"I said…I don't want to be associated with you guys."

"What do you mean by that?" Wakka asked angrily, standing up to look down on Riku.

"I mean I'm done with you guys. I'm done hanging out with you and all of the others. I'm quitting the football team too so it'll be easier. " Riku said firmly, looking up at the astonished Wakka.

"You can't do that!" Wakka yelled, smashing his fist on a nearby table. "You can't just up and leave the group. We've been hanging since forever, ya."

"We no longer have anything in common Wakka. What we shared was a lust for making others look small. I can't do that anymore…"

"Oh so you're all high and mighty now? Trying to be "sweet"?" Wakka said angrily. "Well you know what, I don't play around with shitty turn-coats."

"I know…that's why I'm out." Riku said quietly, turning away from Wakka.

"Don't do this man…don't leave your friends behind. What are you going to be? Without us and the football team you're nothing."

Those words sunk deep in Riku's heart and burned a scar into his heart. Wakka was right. Without the team and his "friends" he_ was_ nothing. He had never thought of it that way before. And nothing had ever hurt him more than those words.

"You should leave Wakka…class is about to start." Riku said after a few moments. He then turned his back to Wakka and stared at the wall thinking about everything and nothing.

"So that's it huh? It's gonna be like that, yah? Well don't expect us to invite you back when you realize what a mistake you've made. You're lame shit, and we don't need you either." Wakka said angrily before stomping out of the nurses office.

Riku bit his lip and sighed sadly as he heard Wakka's footsteps fade into nothing. He didn't really know why he had said those things. Wakka had always been his best friend, they did everything together. Yet now, Riku realized that their friendship consisted of only hatred towards others. Riku didn't want to admit it but he no longer hated others, all his hatred was directed towards himself. And it wasn't a good feeling. Not in the least.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"I swear to god I'm getting rid of that boy."

"Mom don't be crazy…" Riku muttered, staring out the window of her car. His mom had just picked him up for school and they were driving back home for the day.

"I'm not being crazy. Nobody lays a hand on my pumpkin." The woman stated angrily, jerking the car around a street corner making Riku slam against his window.

Riku groaned and sat back up a bit dizzily. "Mom can you slow down…please?"

"Huh? Oh sorry." Riku's mom said slowing the car down gradually.

"Mom…why do you hate Sora?" Riku asked after a few seconds. He didn't expect his mother to answer, and if she did she'd probably answer vaguely.

"I don't hate him…I dislike him." His mother said. Riku could tell she was quite annoyed by the look on her face.

"Why do you and Dad hate him so much that you're always beating him up…?" Riku prodded again. "Why don't you treat me the same…?"

"Riku!" His mother yelled exasperated. "Why the hell would we beat you up? Give me one good reason!"

"I don't know…what's stopping you?" Riku said after a few moments.

"What's stopping us…Riku you're our son."

"And you're supposed to treat Sora like he's your son…but you don't."

"There are reasons for that."

"There's no reason for beating someone up, Mom. It's not right and you know it."

"Riku honestly. Stop bothering me with this." His mother snapped, turning into their driveway. "You're father and I are going out tonight. Dinners is in the oven." She said, waiting for Riku to get out of the car.

Riku got out slowly and turned away without another word. Entering his house, he found it eerily quiet. Usually, when Sora was alone, the music in his room would be blasting and you could hear him moving about cleaning up the house.

"Sora…?" Riku asked, raising his voice so Sora could hear him. However there was no answer. All Riku could hear was the low buzz of the furnace heating the house.

"Sora…where are you?" Riku asked, climbing up the stairs slowly. The door to Sora's room was shut tight.

"Sora are you in there?" Riku said knocking on Sora's door. He then heard something. It was quiet, barely discernable, but it was there. It sounded like crying. A few seconds later Riku determined that it was and knocked on the door again, a bit louder this time.

"What do you want Riku…?" Came Sora's voice through the door. It wasn't full of anger like earlier in the day. It just sounded lost.

"Are you okay?" Riku asked, leaning against the side of the door frame.

"No…I'm not." Riku could barely make out the quiet voice but heard it nonetheless.

"I…do you need anything?" Riku asked after a minute. Sora didn't answer and Riku was about to ask again when the door opened.

"Why do you care?" Sora asked, looking up at the older boy. The question wasn't rude nor anger filled. It was merely a softly put question.

"I…because I…" Riku stuttered out. Sora looked horrible. His face was hidden by a hoodie but Riku could make out the damage done to him. He was also holding his right arm awkwardly which Riku made a guess was broken.

Sora quirked a sad smile and went to close his door but Riku stopped him. "It's because I'm….I'm worried about you."

"…Well please don't." Sora said softly. "I already have enough people worrying about me…I don't need another. Besides, what does worrying do? It's just pity."

"I'll…I'll try to get them to stop." Riku said biting his lip. He knew of only one way to do that, and it wasn't good in the least.

"You know the only way to do that is to rat them out." Sora said as if reading his thoughts. "And I know you're not going to do that." He finished, closing his door on Riku's face.

Riku stood there for the next half hour, leaning against the wall in his thoughts. Everything wasn't right. Sora wasn't right. And Riku knew he could fix it, deep down he did. But he didn't have the guts to tell on his parents. Because what would happen to him?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sora sighed as he leaned against his bedroom door. Across from him was his large bay window which gave him a view of the current weather. It had started to rain. Light drips at first but it was now getting fiercer.

Sora closed his eyes as a tear slid down his face. He wiped his face angrily but couldn't stop the stream of tears that followed the first one. After awhile Sora stopped trying to stop the run of tears and merely let the flow. He laid his hand on the ground but stopped when he felt something under it. He was surprised because his floor was usually spotless.

Opening his eyes, Sora looked down at the object he had come across. It was a black packet. He wasn't sure where it was from until he opened it.

_I said I don't do drugs...quit asking."_

_"Nah, take it anyway...you'll use it, I know."_

_"No I won't, I'm not like that..."_

_"Really? Heh, it's better than the knife."_

_"Just take it. Trust me. Think of it as a gift." _

Sora smirked while closing his eyes; his hand clasped tightly around the packet. "They say a little sunshine will wash away the rain…I wonder if it's true…" Sora said to himself with a chuckle.

A few minutes later his cell-phone could be heard ringing. Its caller ID read Kairi, yet he didn't pick it up. The room was quiet except for the sound of the furnace and the rain.

The scene to any onlooker would've been average. The rain, the house, the room. And most would think the boy in the room feel asleep against the door. They would think the boy outside the door was bored with nothing to do. It wasn't supposed to be scary. It wasn't supposed to be heart-wrenching. It wasn't' supposed to go deeper. It was supposed to be simple.

But it wasn't.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Why is it that the good kids go bad in the end. That no matter how hard they try, they'll never stay good forever. It feels like the world has crumbled to bits and we're all suffocating somewhere in the depths of space. I'm headed to a black whole getting sucked in like a vacuum. I've played the good guy for so long that I don't even know what it good is anymore. One mistake was enough to tell me to stay on the high road. Yet tonight I just don't give a damn. Tonight I might ruin my tomorrow. But life has taught me a valuable lesson. Don't worry about today and don't worry about tomorrow. Live in the moment. It's the time you're always living in.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So there we go. Hope you like. I know it was depressing, but yeah…that's how it's gotta be.

Thanks to all my reviewers! I adore you guys. I should be updating soon after this, maybe next weekend, so don't worry about the wait.

Peace


	33. Making Peace Is Not Peaceful

A/N: First off: w00t! I'm on Thanksgiving break…so awesome! (-cries with happiness-) So anyway, expect another update next week.

Anyway, this chapter is fairly short…not much going on here. A Roxas/Namine chapter is coming up soon…so yeah.

Just a not to all the people who think Kairi's going to 'rescue' Sora or 'help' or 'save' Sora out of his situation: that is not realistic. I'm trying to make this story as realistic as possible and making the girlfriend who's only known him for a few months "make everything better" is very unrealistic. It's not going to happen that way. Yes there will be Sora/Kairi, but not in that way. K yeah, hope you all understand.

Haha, OneRepublic's song Apologize and Senses Fail's The Priest and The Matador kept coming to mind while writing this chapter…I have absolutely no idea why.

Oh yeah, I do not own the Sprint Voicemail message (Just thought I'd add that in)

Anyway, you guys are probably thinking this is a pointless authors note so on to the story.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hey, world it's me. The dear god's rejected child. I'm floating in a cloud of broken ice. It's burning my skin yet cooling it at the same time. I took too much and I'm seeing heaven and hell. Which one wants me? I don't know. If you could hurry up and make your choice, please. Don't let them save me this time. But I'm seeing a white light and now I'm staring into a doctor's face. You took too long to cast me to hell God, does that mean I'm not hopeless after all?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"_You have reached the number of: Sora Wakayama. __At the tone, please record your voice message. When you are finished recording you may hang up or press pound for more options" _

"Hey Sora…this is Kairi. I just wanted to…um…I just wanted to see how you were. You looked mad earlier and I don't know…I don't know if you can't come to the phone or something but…just give me a call, okay?"

"Hey Sora…I know I left a message earlier, but I justed wanted to talk to you. To see if everythings okay…you usually call me about this time, so I'm just wondering…call me if you get this."

"Sora…please pick up the phone. I'm really worried about you…"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"He _what?!_"

"Overdosed on cocaine Mrs. Wakayama."

"You mean…oh god…"

Riku looked up from where he was sitting and glanced over at his parents. His father's face was beet red in anger and his mother looked as if she were about to throw up. Riku didn't quite understand their reactions to this. He knew his father would be angry, but a little sympathy maybe? He had guessed wrong. He could tell that both of his parents were only thinking about their reputations. How would it sound if news got out that their foster kid nearly died after overdosing on crack?

"He should be alright…though I suggest you consider the idea of rehab." The doctor said quietly, lowering his voice so the other people in the waiting room couldn't hear.

"No…he doesn't need it." Riku said after a minute. "He was just overwhelmed…"

"That doesn't mean he's not addicted."

"It was only one time." Was Riku's annoyed response.

"Still, that doesn't change anything. Rehab-"

"Shut up and mind your own damn business, he doesn't need it and that's final!" Riku barked out, causing the other people in the waiting room to look up curiously.

"Riku, calm down." Riku's mother said quietly, touching Riku's arm. Riku jerked his arm away and sat down in a chair far from his parents.

The doctor, though put-off by the silver-haired boy, looked back down at his clipboard. "We noticed some other things not related to the cocaine…bruises and a broken arm?" He asked, looking back up at Riku's parents.

"Something could've happened when he got high." Riku's father carelessly suggested, though Riku could tell he was suddenly tense.

"I don't think that's possible. From what we've gathered, we believe he passed out immediately after taking it."

"Well you know kids at school, always getting into fights." Riku's mom said, laughing nervously.

The doctor sighed and shook his head, not really believing them but not brave enough to confront the great Wakayama's.

"He should be able to leave tomorrow afternoon." The doctor finished, checking something of on his clipboard. "If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask."

Riku's parents nodded and watched the doctor exit the waiting room before taking deep breaths of air. Their son only scowled at their behavior.

"You guys are pathetic…" Riku muttered under his breath. His parents frowned at this statement but didn't say anything. What was there to say?

"Me and your father are going to get something to eat…do you want anything?" Riku's mother asked, looking in her purse for her wallet.

"Just a smoothie…" Riku stated, standing up. "I'm going to go see Sora." He added before walking off into the hallway before his parents could stop him.

"Um, can I have the room for Sora Wakayama?" Riku asked after finding the front desk of the recovery care unit.

"Are you a relative?" The young blond woman asked curiously. The boy didn't look anything like the chocolate haired teen that had just been admitted.

"He's my foster brother..." Riku said quietly, passing the woman his driver's license as proof. He was hoping and praying she would just see his name and picture and not check it because his license was suspended.

"Okay, room 546." The woman said, handing him a visitors pass. "Just warning you, he's pretty out of it…the nurses say he's still reacting to some of the drugs."

Riku nodded and started his walk through the large recovery unit. He found himself getting lost and distracted several times and had to keep urging himself to find room 546. After around fifteen minutes of searching, he finally arrived at his destination. A room that was a bit secluded from the rest.

Riku knocked on the door softly, not really expecting an answer but being polite in doing so. As he assumed, no one answered, so Riku took the liberty to open the door and walk inside.

"Sora…?" Riku asked, stepping into the dim room. He could here the sound of the IV bottles dripping, and the beeping of a heart monitor system. Riku shivered in apprehension to the room. He despised hospitals and detested being in hospital rooms. But he was determined to talk to Sora and that was all that mattered right now.

"Hey…" Came Sora's quiet voice. "The lights over there…don't trip." Riku looked in the direction Sora's figure was pointing in and inched over carefully to turn the light's up.

After turning on the light, Riku looked over at Sora and sighed. "You look like…" He started, but stopped himself before saying anything Sora might get angry at.

"Crap? Yeah…that's what happens when you inject poison into your bloodstream…" Sora finished, playing with the edge of his sheet.

"It's not just that…"

"Oh really?...Well I'm used to getting slapped around now."

"Sora…"

"Look Riku…I don't want to talk about it. It's all…it's just…not worth it." Sora said sighing after he finished. He turned his back towards Riku and before he could stop himself he started rambling. "I'm sorry I punched you at school…I was angry that…I don't know who you are anymore. I used to know what to expect from you, but I can't predict you anymore…and I hate it."

Riku raised his eyebrows in surprise. This had to be the most Sora had ever talked to him about his feelings. "I'm trying to change…"

"That's what's bothering me. You seem to think I should trust you…but I can't."

"I know…I don't expect you to trust me. Ever. But…I want you to know that I'm trying…and maybe someday we can put peace between each other."

The room was silent for what seems like eternity. The only sounds were the beating of the heart monitor, the IV and the nurses outside of the door. Besides that it was silent. It was almost so silent that it was loud. Riku was about to give up hope of Sora answering when the brunette turned around slowly and looked him in the eyes.

"Riku…I can't make peace with you. It won't be possible until I have peace in my life. And I don't. So if you can make peace in my life happen, then I'll make peace with you. But I don't expect that."

Riku's mouth went dry with these words. Sora had put the point across bluntly. Sora wasn't up for a relationship until he was out of the horrid hell hole he was living in. Riku was again plagued by the thought of telling on his parents, his heart said yes, but his conscious said no.

"I um…I should probably leave." Riku said standing up from the chair he was sitting in.

"Bye." Was Sora's only answer to that as he turned towards the wall again.

"Um…just to let you know…your um, girlfriend is it?"

"Kairi?" Sora asked, turning quickly back to look at Riku. "What about her?"

"Uh, yeah…she's been calling your cell-phone like crazy. I think you should call her." The silver haired teen said nervously, tossing the black cell-phone onto Sora's bed.

"Bye…" He whispered quietly, exiting the room and heading back in the direction of the waiting room.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora?" Kairi asked, opening the door to Sora's room, looking around nervously. "Are you in here…?"

After receiving no answer, Kairi turned around to go and ask a nurse where here beloved chocolate haired boy had gone. Before she could exit the door though, she felt arms wrap around her waist in the softest manner.

Kairi turned around and smiled, hugging Sora tightly. He looked almost normal, having changed back into his gothic attire. He had demanded that the nurses let him where it while Kairi visited.

"I was worried about you…" Kairi said, though it came out as a mumble for her face was buried in Sora's shoulder.

"Don't worry about me…"

"Don't tell me what to do." Kairi muttered, pulling back from Sora. "I have a right to be worried."

"I know…" Sora said through a sigh, pulling Kairi back against him and leading them over to the soft bed.

"You could tell them Sora…it could all be over now." Kairi said quietly. Both of them were now lying on the bed, side by side, looking at each others eyes.

"I know…" Sora answered with hopelessness in his voice.

"So why don't you…?"

"I don't know…" Sora whispered, tears coming to his eyes. He closed his eyes and turned away, holding his broken arm to his chest.

"Well now you know…that holding it in…cutting…a-and drugs…won't work." Kairi said slowly. "The last option is one we both know…please don't leave me." She whispered, wrapping her arms around Sora's waist as he was turned away from her.

"I won't kill myself, Kairi…"

"You've tried to…"

"I won't anymore…"

"I wish I could believe you…"

The room was quiet for the second time that evening. After awhile Kairi fell asleep leaving Sora with his thoughts. He wanted nothing more than to escape from the life he was living in. Death seemed so inviting at the moment, yet so wrong when he remembered what Kairi had just said. He knew it was only matter of time before he lost it completely.

Staring at the wall, Sora leaned out and traced an invisible message on the white emptiness.

It merely said: _"I wish I could believe me too…"_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

If only I could be a puppet for a day. I'd let you make me say the words that are chained in my heart. I don't know why I'm such a fool. I don't know why I won't say a word. I'm afraid for my future, love. I don't know where I'm going and I'd rather die alone. Please don't shed a tear for my skin; I don't have any tears for you. It'd be best if you move on from me. But we both know that's impossible. It'd be best if I moved on from you. But love, remember, my future is nowhere. Together we'll find it. Forge my signature on the papers of my life. I can't do it by myself anymore.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: Yeah….so there you go, another chapter. Yay. Anyways…just a few more (and by a few, I don't mean two.)

Oh by the way, I kind of like the headers and footers for once. Weird…anyway, moving on.

Thanks to all my reviewers! (31, yay!)

Peace


	34. He Was It, But I Think We Stole The Show

A/N: Hey guys, another chapter here. A week late, sadly. But oh well. This is all Roxas/Namine. It will probably be the last chapter that has much to do with them seeing as this story is slowly coming to an end. I'd say we have about four or five more chapters with an epilogue left. So yep, we're almost done. Don't worry about the Roxas/Namine relationship building. The sequel has more to do on this relationship than this story.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

When the sun rises you two will shine brighter. When the moon shines down you two will fly higher. A small breakable bond that will grow stronger. Don't worry, life won't keep you down. Stand up and be proud because you have something worth living for. Don't pollute your minds with thoughts of me.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"So…what if ice was hot and fire was cold?"

"I don't know…I'd probably kill myself by mistake."

"Me too…what if dogs were cats and cats were dogs?"

"Roxas, that doesn't make any sense."

"Yeah I know." Roxas said through a sigh, leaning against the front counter of his father's restaurant.

"Something wrong?" Namine asked quietly, looking closely at her crush.

"No…well…yeah, sort of." Roxas said picking up a toothpick and chewing on it while in deep thought.

"Feel like sharing?"

"Well…you know my brother…?"

"Yeah, Sora. What about him?"

"I think he's in trouble. You know…like at home."

"You mean you think he's being…" Namine stared, trailing off.

"Yeah…I know this is a crazy assumption and everything but…I just feel like something's not right there. I mean…ugh…I don't know." Roxas said sighing exasperatedly.

"If I may ask…where are you getting these ideas?"

"Well…I don't know. He's always getting picked on and stuff…"

"That doesn't mean he's getting pushed around at home."

"Well I know at least one person does." Roxas said before thinking.

"What…?" Namine asked curiously. She knew this was not just a thought. It was truth. She had been around Roxas long enough to know when he was saying fact and not fiction.

"Never mind…" Roxas said quietly, realizing what he had just said. Namine wasn't supposed to know about Riku. He had told Sora he'd keep it a secret.

"Tell me now, Roxas. I already know it's the truth." Namine said firmly.

"I can't. I promised Sora."

"Then why are you bothering me with your problems? If you aren't going to tell me anything then I need not listen to you." Namine said in a huff, turning to wipe of the counter top.

"Well, ugh…eh…" Roxas started with a sigh. "Fine…well…he has a foster brother…who beats him up at school."

"A foster brother?" Namine said raising her eyebrows. She mentally scanned through the list of people who bothered the goth boy and started narrowing down the options.

"well yeah, I don't know if I should give names…"

"Riku?"

"Huh?"

"It's Riku."

"How did you know?" Roxas asked, surprised and somewhat worried.

"I didn't. You just told me." Namine said through a smirk. Roxas frowned and sighed, leaning back against the countertop.

"I don't know what to do…" Roxas said after a minute. "I want to help him but…he won't let me in. Whenever we get to talking about our past and stuff…well he locks up."

"Maybe your past wasn't a good one…maybe he's trying to protect you."

"Well wouldn't I carry something from that? Wouldn't a remember _something_?"

"It depends…" Namine said quietly, not knowing how to answer the question.

Roxas sighed and looked down at his hands. Looking up at Namine for a quick second, he put his hand in his jacket pocket, looking for a certain object.

"What are you looking for?" Namine asked after a moment.

"A picture. A picture of me and Sora when we were little." Roxas said, finally pulled the folded picture out of his pocket.

"This is me…and Sora." Roxas said softly, handing the image to Namine.

Namine looked at the image and gasped. She hadn't expected to see the face of her beloved friend from so many years ago. She hadn't expected to see the familiarity of the whole picture. It almost felt surreal.

"Sora…he's…he's my friend…" Namine managed to say quietly.

"What…I thought you didn't like him."

"No…he's my friend. From long ago…" Namine said softly. "We were together at the foster care agency…I was waiting for my mom…he was waiting for anyone."

"Do…do you know how he got there…and not me?"

--

"Hey Sora!"

"Hi…"

"Why are you always drawing so much?"

"I likes it…"

"Why do you keep drawing your brother though…don't you want to draw anything else?"

"No. He was my best friend."

"Where'd he go…you just said he was 'gone'?

"I don't wants to talk about it…"

"Oh come on! He's probably just lost."

"He's not."

"Then where is he?"

"I said I don't wants to talk about it Nami!"

"But why…it's not like he's dead."

"Yeah he is! He's dead, Nami. He's gone and he's not coming back! He's gone…just like everybody else…"

--

Namine felt tears rising to her eyes as she thought back to that day. She didn't know it then. She didn't fully understand what life and death meant. What it meant for a person to die and never come back. Yet, Sora did. It was much too early for him. Everything was too early for him.

"I think…maybe…I think they thought you were dead Roxas…and they separated you…"

"Dead?! How the hell could they think I was dead?"

"I don't know, I just remember Sora getting angry about it. He said you were dead…gone."

"That's ridiculous. I'm alive, aren't I?"

"Yeah well whatever…that's what I remember."

"Well maybe you remembered wrong." Roxas said, muttering something inaudible under his breath.

"Look, you need to calm down."

"That's easy enough for you to say, you've never been in a situation like this." Roxas said, angrily.

"Shut up, Roxas. You don't know what I've been through." Namine snapped, slamming down the plate she was carrying from a table.

"Well what have you been through, hmm? Regular teenage girl drama?" The blonde haired boy yelled, sarcastically. It was their luck that the restaurant hadn't opened and it was only the two of them in the front room of the restaurant

"No. I've had real drama. Drama that I can't control." Namine said through clenched teeth, stepping up to Roxas.

"Yeah really." Roxas muttered rolling his eyes. Because of this, he never saw Namine's fist rise up and punch him square in the jaw.

"You're a stupid, whiny, smart-assed kid who doesn't know anything! Don't you ever mock me again!" Namine yelled angrily as Roxas landed smack against the side of the countertop. "You don't know what I have to go through! Did you even listen to me that night…did you even listen to me a minute ago? I had to stay in a damn foster home because my mom was too drunk to take care of me!"

Namine couldn't hold back the tears that came flowing from her eyes. "My dad left us…I don't know where he is. My mom is bipolar; I never know when she'll be herself. We're on the verge of losing everything because no one will hire my mom and she gambles away what little we have. You don't know what it's like not knowing what tomorrow holds. So yeah, I know what Sora's going through…what you're going through. I can relate." The blonde girl finished, wiping furiously at her eyes.

Roxas looked up at the teary blonde and felt a rush of guilt run through his heart. Standing up, he was about to say something when Namine started taking off her apron quickly.

"I'm going to go…I'm sorry for punching you. I really shouldn't have." The girl grabbed her coat and her backpack and was headed towards the door when she felt a tug on her sleeve.

Turning around, she came in perfect contact with Roxas's deep blue eyes. She couldn't help but blush seeing as his eyes were only mere inches from hers.

"I…I apologize…" Roxas said quietly. "I was wrong…about what I said."

"You had a right to be angry…"

"But not the right to get angry at you." Roxas said seriously. Namine only blushed deeper at this comment. The room was suddenly getting hot and her hands were getting embarrassingly clammy.

"Well…don't…don't worry about it." Namine said after a minute.

"Okay…" Roxas whispered before pulling her close into a soft, hesitant, but extremely immature kiss. The kiss lasted for only a mere three seconds, yet as small and juvenile it was, it meant much more.

Roxas was the first to pull away, a blush covering his face. He absentmindedly scratched the back of his head and searched the room for anything to take his attention away from the moment at hand.

However, after a moment he turned to face the other blonde, deciding it was best to set things straight.

"Um…yeah…that kiss didn't mean anything." He said lamely, finding no better answer in the moment.

"What if I want it to mean something?" Namine said after a minute, noticing that the nervousness in Roxas's voice meant that he had said the opposite of what he wanted to say.

"Well…then…I guess it's something?" Roxas answered, blushing at his lame answer.

Namine smiled and squeezed his hand. "Let me get you some ice or something…your mom will kill me if she sees you like this." The girl said, taking off her coat and heading for the kitchen door.

_But yeah, I think it's something_.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I hope you can hold it together. A small spark of light called chance will guide you through. I'm not one to take a torch and burn true love. So don't think back to this as a topic about me. Think of it as a start of a new life, not the end of mine.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So yeah…I don't like the ending, but I was trying not to make it sappy like the Sora/Kairi chapter. Jeeze…that was way too cheesy. Anyway. Hope you enjoy.

Thank you to all my reviewers! I adore you guys. :) For the **77** individuals who have this story on their favorites list and even have me on their favorite authors list but have not reviewed, shame on you. You may think I'm greedy because I have over 600 reviews. However, I only wish to hear your comments on parts of my story. What parts you liked and what parts you think need to be fixed. I am not greedy. If I were I'd be a Review b who won't write a chapter until I get a certain amount of reviews.

I personally think that if you like a story enough to favorite it, you should at least leave **one** review. I certainly do this for stories I like (Even though I have none favorited…I'm too lazy. But at least I review!)

So yeah, thank you for the 38 people who regularly review. You guys seriously make my day. :)

Anyways, until next time!

Peace


	35. And It All Ends Tonight

A/N: Wow…it's been forever. Yeah. So let me explain my late update. A couple of weeks ago I got grounded for being um… disobedient I guess. I got grounded from the computer and my ipod (-cries in despair-). So that kind of explains why I'm updating so late. The only reason I get to get on the computer today is because it's my birthday. Yay! I'm 16….lala. So since my parents let me get on today, I decided to type this chapter up quick. And believe me, I am very disappointed with this chapter. It's too short in my opinion and just…well I don't know. I pray that you guys like it. It kind of sucks that I only had a few hours to update and that it's like…11:07 PM here. But I thought you guys had waited enough and that I probably won't be able to update in awhile so. I hope you guys like it.

Enough rambling, on to the story.

P.S. (Please mind spelling errors and such, I was in a terrible hurry today…so please…don't bash…)

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I've seen many people in my life, but so far you're the most confusing. I doodle in my heart the faces of people I know. Their feelings, emotions; I study them. Scrutinize them. And I've developed formulas on how they react to things. How they perceive the world. How they perceive me. But you, you're an exception. It's hard to change my feelings on things I know should be set in stone. I thought you were one of them. But turns out, you might be more like me.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Do you want anything…?"

"No…"

"Are you su-"

"I'm fine, Riku."

"Okay…sorry."

"Whatever."

Riku turned away from the upset figure staring aimlessly at the television set. He noticed the tense look in his face and the fidgeting of his fingers. Every five seconds the boy would glance at the clock, hoping and praying that it would never reach two.

"Dad should be…happy because…well the snow is almost gone…" Riku said pitifully.

"No he won't. He's never happy when he sees me…" Sora replied coldly.

"Yeah but at least…well…"

"Whatever…" Sora interrupted, hoping to stop Riku from talking. It was almost all he could handle at the moment to sit still on the couch.

"He shouldn't yell or anything, that's all I'm saying."

"He'll yell Riku…he'll scream and get angry…he'll hit and punch. It's a habit, he doesn't even think about it anymore. It just…happens."

"I could…"

"No you can't."

"Yeah I could, he never…does anything to me." Riku said, trying to protect the little pride he had for his father.

"What do you think is stopping him? Sooner or later-"

"Shut up! You don't know that, he'd never hit me. I'm his son!" Riku yelled angrily, backing away from the couch.

"Yeah…you're his son." Sora said quietly, not having the will to fight Riku at the moment.

"He…he won't be that mad." Riku said after a few minutes. "It's…not that bad."

"He'll wonder why we're home Riku. Why we're not at school. Why I got into another stupid fight trying to_ protect_ myself. Why you're here because you got into a stupid fight trying to protect _me_. Oh he's going to wonder, and I'm going to be dead."

"He won't kill me."

"He almost has…had. Twice."

"He didn't mean it, he was drunk."

"So then it doesn't matter that I got hurt then. I get it."

"No, I didn't mean that!"

"Just go away Riku, please." Sora said quietly, glancing at the clock. "Your mom will be home…like now." Just as he spoke these words, Riku's mother stepped through the door of the huge house. She was humming a quiet tune but stopped abruptly when she saw the two boys in the living room.

"What the he- what are you doing here?" The woman asked angrily.

"We um…." Riku started, glancing at Sora who only glanced at the woman once before opening his mouth.

"I got into a fight at school…Riku…tried to stop it, but we both got sent home."

"You what?! If I'm not mistaken this is the…what, fourth time you've been sent home or suspended?"

Sora nodded looking down at his painted nails. It was no use fighting the woman. No use trying to prove his innocence in the bulk of the fights. He'd tried before and it only got him into more trouble with Riku's father in the end.

"God you little annoyance…well he'll deal with you later. Riku, go…do something." The woman said exasperated while stomping up the stairs with her huge shopping bags in hand. "And don't think that I'm going to forget about it. I'm calling him right now." The woman finished, grabbing her cell phone out of her pocket at the top of the stairs.

Sora only sighed and closed his eyes, avoiding both Riku and his Riku's mother's gaze. He never could understand why Riku's mother was always jumping at the chance to him get hurt. It was confusing, as if she didn't have any sympathy in her heart at all.

"Why do you hate me?" Sora asked all of the sudden looking up at the woman who was holding her cell phone to her ear.

"What?" The woman snapped, glaring down at Sora while shutting her cell phone off. Riku glanced at Sora and furrowed his eyebrows in worry, what in the world was he doing?

"I mean…why are so mad at me? What did I do to you to make you hate me?" Sora asked quietly.

Riku stared at him and felt a pang of guilt. Sora sounded as if he were about to cry yet his face showed no emotion.

"Why do you think?" Riku's mother said frowning.

"I don't know what to think…" Sora said lowering his eyes and walking back into the living room. Riku's mother merely rolled her eyes and opened her cell phone, heading towards her bedroom.

"Sora…?" Riku asked after he heard his mother shut her door.

"Yeah?"

"Um…Dad will be home soon…I could…well we could leave…"

"And face a greater hell to pay when I get back? I think not."

"But…-" Riku started but was stopped by the sound of a car pulling into the driveway. Both he and Sora were silent as the heard the loud slam of the car door indicating that Riku's father was either drunk, furious, or both.

Riku glanced worriedly at Sora. Sora looked up briefly but when his eyes met Riku's he looked away. A few seconds later the keys could be heard rattling in the door. Riku gulped and backed away from the door in order not to be pushed behind it as his father burst in.

"Where is he?!" Were the first words out of the fiery red faced man as soon as he had the door open.

"Dad it really wasn't his fault." Riku said quietly, standing in front of his father's line of view to Sora.

"Damn it it's always his fault! Do you know that if you get suspended one more time you might get expelled? And for god's sake it's that damn boy who's getting you into all this shit!"

"It wasn't his fault, some guys were messing with him." Riku said quietly.

"Riku just stop it…" Sora said after a second coming out from behind Riku only to be punched into the wall to the left of him.

"So what, you were hiding from me?!" Riku's father yelled, grabbing Sora by the collar and flinging him across the foyer to crash against the opposite wall.

At that moment Riku's mother descended the stars swinging her purse from side to side. Riku couldn't erase the look of disgust that came to his face when he noticed the smirk on her face.

"Mom stop this!" He yelled angrily, desperate for her to do something.

"Riku hun, it's not our problem." The woman said before walking off in the direction of the kitchen.

"But mom!" Riku yelled, feeling tears come to the back of his eyes. He couldn't wrap his mind around his either of his parent's actions. He didn't understand why they could be so kind to him yet turn around and be monsters towards Sora.

Riku bit his lip angrily and turned to face his father who was busy trying to strangle Sora with the silk tie the boy was wearing.

"Dad stop!" Riku yelled, grabbing his father's arms and shoving him against the opposite wall. Looking his father in the face, Riku could barely believe his eyes when he saw his father raise his fist in the direction of his face. He never expected the harsh punch to his jaw seconds after. He'd never thought it would happen. Never thought his father would go that far. But the truth was that he did. And it hurt him more emotionally than physically.

Seconds after the punch, Riku felt a sensation of a dozen knifes stabbing into his back. He didn't realize at the moment that the force of the punch had caused him to crash into his mother's glass armoire filled with her beloved wedding dishes.

"Holy shi- Riku what the hell did you do?" Riku's mother yelled, rushing towards the armoire, shoving Riku in the process to get to her dishes.

"You've ruined them!" She yelled angrily. Riku looked over at his mother, his vision blurry and his head dizzy.

"Damn it." Riku's mother said standing up suddenly and stomping off into her kitchen. At that moment Riku felt his world shatter. Whatever world he had been living in only 30 minutes ago no longer existed. His parent's words and actions had shattered him and he had never felt more alone in his life. His father didn't hesitate to punch him and his mother didn't care about his safety. Only her dishes. It all seemed so…unreal.

Riku shuddered and slowly picked himself up from the floor, noticing not only his blood splattered everywhere, but Sora's. It was then that Riku noticed that Sora and his father were no longer in the foyer. Standing up Riku looked up the staircase noticing his fathers boot prints on the white carpet. Seconds later her heard the thud of someone hitting a wall and the angry yells of his drunk father.

Riku was about to walk up the stairs when he stopped. He knew he couldn't do anything about it. He knew his father had locked the door, and if he hadn't he would take Riku out the minute he entered the room. Deep down Riku knew that today was different. He knew that his father would take it too far this time. He could tell by the look of his face and by the mere fact that he was so angry he would punch his own son. Riku also knew that if this went on any longer Sora probably wouldn't see the light of day again. And yet, he could do nothing about it. But someone else could.

Pulling out his cell phone, Riku slowly dialed a three digit number, tears running down his face the entire time.

"Hello…yes I…I'd like to report a case of…" Riku started, but stopped. Everything that he knew flashed before his eyes. His parents, his childhood, his home and school. Everything he knew was at risk. He didn't want to make this call and jeopardize his future. Ruin his parent's lives forever. Yet if he didn't, he'd have to live with the guilt of Sora's ultimate end. It was almost like murder. And if Riku knew anything, murder was something you never forget.

"A-abu-…please just come. Now. H-he might die…" Riku said quietly before shutting his cell phone off. Not able to handle his emotions, Riku ran. He ran from his house and his neighborhood. He kept running, tripping, hoping to outrun his fears. Hoping to outrun his tears. He ran until he couldn't run anymore. Giving out, he collapsed against a tree in a place he had never been before. Where he knew nobody and nobody knew him.

Yet against that tree he realized that he _could _run away from everything he knew. That he could escape his home. His family. But the truth was he couldn't escape the very thing he hated most.

He couldn't escape himself. And at that moment, he wanted nothing more.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

And they say don't cry for the dead. Because they're never coming back and your tears mean nothing. But it's almost a sin you see. How can you not cry for something that was there and disappeared in the blink of an eye? I saw you running away from your life. I wanted to run with you until I heard the sirens. I think I owe you something. For your bravery, maybe. Please know that I thank you. But please know that it's not your fault. I used to hate you. But now I know that hate is fierce word. And you have my promise; I'll never use it again.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So yeah that was short…but, it's the best I can do. I don't know when I'll be back to update…I'll have to beg my parents or something. But yeah. Hope you guys can bear it. Thanks to all my reviewers! Love you guys! I'm so sorry I can't reply to your reviews but I'm trying my best to keep this story alive so yeah.

Happy Holidays!...Well…happy New Year! See you in 2008!

Peace


	36. Feeling Scared When Your Safe

A/N: Hey again…here I am with a new chapter. I'm quite um..depressed right now. I'm about to head back to school on Monday and I really, really, don't want to go. But oh well.

This is the last long chapter. All future chapters are going to be short, so please get used to that. My sequel will also have shorter chapters. I'm just getting tired of writing so much, to be honest.

Hope you like this chapter!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

In my mind I'm standing on a bridge laughing at the sky. The people think I'm crazy. Yeah, I'm a little crazy. I mock them, cuss them out. The people think I'm angry. Yeah, I'm a little angry. I cry and curse my insides to hell. The people think I'm hurting. Yeah, I'm a little hurt. I smile and wave before I fall. And the people think I'm happy. Yeah, I'm a little happy. And then the people see me falling. And their mouths open in screams of horror. And as I fall with a smile on my face, fire in my eyes, and tears on my cheeks, I laugh. Because everybody opens their mouths when it's impossible. They could have saved me. They could have helped me down. But they only think. And they think correctly. Because they guessed my feelings by my actions. But they couldn't stop my actions from saving my fate. I hope you remember to act. Because just thinking, keeping it all to yourself, will never save a life.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Dear Diary,

I don't know why I decided to open you up today. The last time I wrote in you was months ago. I have no one to confide this with, though. I feel like something bad is going to happen. Like I'm going to lose something dear to me. I have no idea what it is, but...It's scary. I've had this feeling before. Right before my Dad died. I'm praying that this is not the exact same feeling.

On another note, I'm worried about Sora. I know I haven't ever mentioned him in here before but…to put it simply, he's my boyfriend. I won't go into detail but…he's in trouble, and I know I could stop it if I wanted to. I know I should, but I could lose him. I don't know what to do.

The phone is ringing...and the feeling. Oh god the feeling is making me dizzy. Something is wrong…

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Why the hell didn't he tell me!"

"He doesn't know you, Roxas." Namine said quietly, grabbing his arm and forcing him back into to the waiting room chair. "He knows you're his brother and nothing more."

"But…why didn't he tell anyone?"

"I'm sure he did…Kairi probably knows…and Riku."

"To hell with that bastard."

"Calm down Roxas, this is Riku's parents' fault not his."

"You and me both know that Riku probably had a hand in this."

"I…I know, he probably did. But let's leave him out of this right now." Namine said quietly, looking down at her hands. In all honesty, she was worried about Riku as well. Not a word had been said about the silver haired boy by police or paramedics. Yet, someone had made the call…but no one knew who it was.

"Did I say something to upset you…?" Roxas asked after a minute, touching one of Namine's golden locks.

"No, honestly no. I'm good." The blonde girl said softly giving the boy a small smile.

"Namine…?"

Namine looked up towards the door of the waiting room to see the person who had said her name.

"Kairi?" Namine said standing up. Giving a smile she walked over to girl and gave her a hug, fully knowing that the red-headed girl was trying to keep from crying.

"Is he alright…?" Kairi asked after a moment, looking over at Roxas who was watching them from afar.

"We don't know. They won't tell us anything yet." The boy said looking over at the door that led to the emergency room.

"What happened?" Kairi asked after Namine had led them back over to where they were sitting.

"Riku's dad….he…went too far. If you don't know what I mean…"

"No, I know. Sora told me."

The group was quiet for a second, all three lost in their own thoughts. Two of them felt helpless and one felt guilt. But together the three only created sadness.

"Who is…who's in charge of him?" Kairi asked after a few minutes.

"Tifa is for now. She's in there." Roxas answered.

"And Riku's parents…?"

"They're in custody." Namine finished. Just as she said this, Tifa walked out from behind the emergency room doors.

"Hey." She said softly, sitting in one of the seats opposite of the three teenagers. The three nodded and said soft hello's to the young biology teacher.

"The doctors said he should be alright…" Tifa started, noting the way all three seemed to be holding their breath. "He has suffered a great deal of injuries though; it will take awhile for him to get back to his normal self.

"What 'injuries'?" Roxas asked, hoping and praying that none were fatal.

"The physical ones will heal. Broken bones, concussions and sprains are the most. However, Sora's shown signs of Acute Stress Disorder."

The three teenagers looked at each other; all of them with the same look of horror and confusion plastered across their faces.

"Um…like, what is that?" Namine asked after a moment. "I mean I know it has something to do with stress…obviously, but I mean, what are the symptoms and such?

"Well for one thing, it's not certain. It takes about two days to accurately make a diagnosis. Sora might get over this and it won't be a problem. The symptoms range from different levels. I'll let the doctors inform you on those. However, to put it simply, a person who experiences ASD has usually been exposed to a life threatening stimulus and they reacted in fear. It's kind of like emotional trauma."

Kairi looked as if she were about to faint. Trembling she looked up at Tifa and timidly asked a question, even though she didn't want to hear anymore.

"Is that…is that all?" She asked quietly.

"Well…"

"He's suffers from depression…I think that's obvious." Kairi said softly.

"Well yes, he does. It's severe though…suicidal thoughts accompanying. Did you know?" Tifa asked, looking at the quiet red head and then glancing over at an equally quiet Namine and an angry looking Roxas.

"Yeah, I know. I should've said something but…he didn't want me to."

"I see. Well, let me tell you something Kairi. No matter how much you think someone will hate you. If you know they're in trouble, you need to tell. Okay?"

"Yeah…okay." Kairi said sadly, feeling guilty. Right now she wanted nothing more than to run behind those big emergency room doors and find her beloved Sora.

"Tifa Lockhart…? A doctor said from the door of the emergency room.

"Yes, I'm right here." Tifa said standing up and walking over to the doctor.

"Ah yes. Well good news. He's awake again and doing all right. He's breathing on his own without the ventilator so that's a good sign."

"Oh thank god, can he speak…?" Tifa asked quietly, keeping her voice low so as the three teenagers watching her couldn't hear.

"Surprisingly yes, but we'd rather him not. I have a question for you."

"Oh? Sure, what is it?" Tifa asked.

"He asked for someone, someone named…Kairi?"

"Oh, his girlfriend. Yes, she's the red head over there."

"Ah okay, well he would like to see her. He can have a minimum of one visitor today, excluding you." The doctor said quietly, nodding his head in Roxas and Namine's direction. "I'm afraid those two are going to have to wait till later."

Tifa sighed and frowned. She knew how much Namine and Roxas wanted to see Sora, but rules were rules. "Okay, we'll be in in a moment."

"Oh, one more thing. The police need to question him…we were really against this because of his condition, but they're persistent. We will have to put him back on the ventilator if he is going to answer questions, just to make sure."

"Oh…okay. Thank you." Tifa said before walking over to the teenagers.

"Is he okay?" Kairi asked immediately, tears springing to her eyes in worry.

"He's fine Kairi. He's awake and can even talk…he wants to see you."

"Really?" Kairi said breathlessly. "Can I see him?"

"Yes, we're about to go back there now. Roxas and Namine, the doctor said only one visitor could see him today and because he requested Kairi, she takes the spot. I'm sorry." Tifa said genuinely.

The two blondes looked at each other and sighed. "Alright…well tell him we miss him and want to see him soon." Namine said quietly. "Tell him…Roxas said that." She said softly, remembering that Sora was not on good terms with her, despite their childhood friendship.

"Hey Namine…" Kairi said slowly as the two blondes turned to leave.

"Hmm?"

"Um, can I call you later or something…?"

"Sure. I'll talk to you later." Namine said softly, grabbing Roxas's hand and exiting the waiting room.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora…?" Kairi asked quietly, opening the door to the room Sora was staying in.

"Hey Kai." Sora said softly, his voice barely above a whisper. He was seated on the hospital bed, reading glasses on, scanning a TIME magazine with little interest. Kairi quickly approached the bed and smiled.

"You look okay…"

"That's good, because I don't feel okay." Sora said after a moment. Looking up he noticed the tears in her eyes and immediately felt guilty. Scooting over on the bed, he patted the now empty side, silently beckoning her to sit down.

Kairi sat down on the bed and traced the edge of the sheets, not knowing what to say. Seconds later she felt Sora's arms wrap around her from the side and the feel of his chin on her shoulder.

"But…I feel okay now that you're here." He said quietly, leaning up and kissing her cheek.

Kairi blushed and smiled. "Are you in any pain?"

"Naw…the drugs are pretty strong…I'm surprised I don't feel high right now."

Kairi nodded, now noticing the multiple IV's on his arm. "Tifa said you were supposed to be on a ventilator."

"Yeah…it's stupid. I don't need that piece of crap. But the doctors are just taking precautions. We're not supposed to be talking right now, if you're wondering."

Kairi giggled and pinched Sora's nose playfully, "They told me you had fallen asleep before we got to the room."

"Yeah, it's so they could take me of that thing. It kills my nose. And you're making it worse by pinching it so hands off." Sora muttered, pretending to be annoyed.

Kairi giggled once again and pulled her hand away. "I'm glad you're okay. I thought you were…"

"Dead? I thought I was too." Sora finished for her. "I don't know what got into him…I don't know what I did."

"You didn't do anything Sora." Kairi said reassuringly.

"He's was like…furious though."

"But…isn't he always?"

"No…he punched Riku. He's never done that before."

"What…" Kairi started, "Sora, where is Riku?"

"I don't know…I don't know what happened to him. I just remember the ambulance sirens and then waking up here."

"He's probably alright." Kairi said more to herself than to Sora.

"No, he's not. Despite everything's he's done…I'm worried about him."

"Do you know who called?" Kairi asked after a few moments of silence.

"No…I think maybe one of the neighbors heard or something. I'll find out when the police come."

The room was silent for minutes. After awhile the two teenagers adjusted their position so that they were lying down, facing each other. A few seconds passed before they were making faces at each other, daring the other to laugh first. Kairi, as usual, was the first to start giggling.

"Stop it Sora, your making me laugh." She said between giggles.

"More like giggle…your weak at this Kairi."

"Oh shut up you buffoon." The red head said, poking his nose playfully.

"Buffoon?" Sora said smiling, playing with a strand of Kairi's dark red hair.

"Eh, it was the first thing that came to mind." Kairi said sighing. "You know, you're really cute without your make-up."

"I feel nude without it." Sora muttered, wiping his eyes. He indeed didn't have any on.

"I like the eye-liner…" Kairi said looking up at the ceiling. "Though it looks horrible on me."

"That's because you don't need it, Kai-Kai." The chocolate haired teen said before kissing her on the forehead.

A few minutes later Tifa entered the room. "I'm sorry Kairi, but the police are here…they need to question Sora."

Kairi sighed and nodded. Standing up she gave Sora a hug, careful not to brush against the cast on his left arm. "Bye Sora…"

"By Kai…see you later."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Again, how long has this been happening?"

"Since I was seven."

"And I'm sorry to ask this again, but it's just for double checking. You're sure it's just been physical and verbal abuse?"

"Yes, just that." Sora said quietly, not even wanting to begin to imagine what experiencing the other types would've been like.

"Well, unfortunately, the suspects have denied everything you have just said. We're going to have settle this in court." The police woman said looking at the papers in her hand.

"I understand." Sora said quietly, playing with the tube that led to the ventilator. The last time he had been in court was when it was decided that he would live with the Wakayamas.

"We have just one last question concerning the call that was made to 911. The person who made the call was obviously a witness as the voice was not matched to the suspects. The call was made from this cell-phone." The woman said, pulling out Riku's sleek black cell-phone. "It's got a password lock on it…we decided to hold off cracking the password until you saw it."

Sora gulped and immediately felt like he needed the ventilator because he couldn't breath. He couldn't believe it. Riku had called. Out of all people, he never expected Riku to be the one.

"That's…That's Riku's phone.

"Riku's their son, right?"

"Yeah…do you know where he is?"

"We're trying to locate him at the moment. No one has seen him." The woman said standing up. "Well, I'll be seeing you later to ask more questions if need be. You'll be seeing your social worker in a few days to discuss living arrangements. Take it easy now." The woman said before exiting the room.

Sora looked down at the white sheets of his bed and tried not to think about Riku. He tried to push everything about the situation out of his head. Sudden feelings of anxiety was quickly enclosing him making him feel sick. He didn't want to remember anything. He felt that he would be alright with the questions and that the memories wouldn't hurt now that he was safe. Yet it was plaguing his mind making him feel dizzy, sick, and horror stricken.

At the moment he didn't know he was suffering from a symptom of ASD. However he did know that the images of the event were flashing before him without ceasing for a minute. And he did hear the rapid beeping of the heart monitor, notifying the nurses that something was wrong.

As the nurses rushed into the room Sora felt tears come to his eyes. Everything was supposed to be okay. He didn't have to worry about anything anymore. He didn't have to be scared. But not knowing his future? Not knowing where he was going to live? Worrying that he might end up in another bad foster home? No, he was scared. It was like a whole new nightmare.

And it just didn't seem fair.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I'm going to laugh now. Watch me. I'm going to smile now. Watch me. I'm going to say 'I love the world'. Watch me. I'm going to be positive. Watch me. I'm going to be optimistic. Watch me. Yes, watch me. Because for the moment I'm going to believe that everything is okay. Please watch me. Because for the moment I'm going to believe that I'm not insane. Watch over me. Because for the moment I'm going to believe that suicide is no longer a problem for me. Watch me closely. Because for the moment I'm going to go a little crazy. Yes, watch me closely. Because right now I want to stop my heart beating. Oh don't look away. Because right now I've got a gun under my pillow. Yeah, don't walk away. Because your back will be the last thing I see. Yes, watch me closely. And never, ever, look away.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So yes, another chapter completed. Yay. Four more to go. I decided to go up to 40. However, there are only two more real chapters after this. The last two are an epilogue and realization scene (I'll explain this later). So It's almost over. It's been about a year too.

Thanks to all my reviewers! You guys are the best. :) Remember to review too! (People must have not liked the last chapter; I got a lot less than I usually do) Anyways, I loves them (just keep that in mind).

Peace

P.S. It'd be cool to reach 1,000 reviews wouldn't it? (Lol, I probably could if all of my people reviewed…but that isn't happening.) I'm aiming for maybe…850. Oh god, I'm rambling. Later!


	37. And It Was Supposed To Be Perfect

A/N: So here I am again with another chapter. I don't like this one, personally, but it's the best I can do. I'm really busy with school staring back up, and well, I'm still grounded…so getting out this chapter was pretty hard (It takes me hours to type a chapter).

Anyway, the first part of this chapter (The part with Sora and Kairi) is kind of based off of a song called 'Cat and Mouse' by the Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. I suggest you all listen to it…it really…captures the moment (haha, so corny) but yeah, just saying. 'The Pursuit' by Evans Blue and 'What I've done' by Linkin Park, remind me of the last part with Riku and Sora. Though I don't know why…oh well.

Well, I hope you like the chapter:)

Oh yeah, mind the grammar and spelling, will you? I was really rushing.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

So please turn away when I say goodbye. Don't believe me. Don't trust me. Believe that I'll be coming back for you. Don't say goodbye to me. Smile and act like you'll see me tomorrow. Don't cry for me. Laugh and be with me like I'll be there forever. Because you kill me when you say goodbye. And you kill me when you believe me. You hurt me when you trust me, and your tears feel like knives. Please fake your sorrow for me. If you don't, I'll spear my heart. Then I promise you, I won't see you tomorrow.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_Beep Beep_

Kairi sat up quickly from her place on the bed and grabbed her beeping cell phone off of her side table. She was about to give up studying the boring history class material when the beeping interpreted her. She had been waiting for this call all day and she wasn't going to miss it.

"Hello?"

"Hey Kai."

"Hi! What's up? What did they say?"

"Um…yeah. You want to meet on the beach or something?"

"Why, is everything okay?"

"Well…I think we should just, you know…speak in person."

"Sure…I'll be right there." Kairi said softly, shutting her cell phone off. Sora sounded worried, really worried. Kairi just hoped everything was okay.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Kairi looked out over the wide beach and sighed. The weather was getting warmer and a hoodie was the only thing needed to keep the chills away. It had been three weeks since the incident. Sora, always being quick to recuperate, had left the hospital a week ago. So far, prescription medicine had been keeping the symptoms of ASD away; however, no amount of anti-depressants could keep Sora from being depressed at least once everyday.

Scanning the beach, Kairi noticed Sora's spiky headed figure leaning against one of the many palm trees. Kairi smiled nervously and jogged down towards the tree, hoping a praying everything was alright.

"Hey." Kairi said quietly, approaching Sora. Sora smiled at her and then turned back to looking at the sinking sun in the distance.

"Everything okay…?" Kairi asked, leaning against the tree next to Sora.

"Yeah….I mean, no." Sora said after a minute. Kairi's heart sank slowly at these words. Nodding her head, she silently urged him to keep talking.

"I…" Sora started, fiddling with his necklace, "Riku's parents plead guilty today…so there will be no trial."

Kairi's eyes lit up on this comment. "Really? That's great! Why?"

"They did it because of Riku…they didn't want to hurt him or anything."

"Riku…?"

"Riku's okay, he was staying at his aunt's house."

"Oh good…he's not hurt or anything?" Kairi asked quietly.

"Just a few scratches and cuts from a few weeks ago…he's fine."

"So…what's wrong?" Kairi asked, not understanding why Sora was so upset. This was good news, wasn't it?"

The atmosphere was quiet for a few minutes. All that was heard was the waves crashing against the edge of the sand, and faint cries of laughter from a group of small children farther down on the beach.

"I'm moving Kairi." Sora said after awhile, touching his crown necklace.

Kairi felt her heart drop lower than her feet. Moving? To where? How far away would he be? Would she be able to see him? Could they still be together?

"W-where?" Kairi squeaked out.

"My god mother…Aeris, she works at a boarding school. She's going to be my legal guardian, so…I'll go to school there."

"A-Aeris…" Kairi said after a moment. "My aunt?"

"You're what?" Sora said looking up.

"Aeris…I have an aunt named Aeris. She works at a boarding school too. What a coincidence…"

"Yeah…" Sora said with a sigh.

"So…that's…that's far away." Kairi said after moment. She remembered the time when Aeris moved away. She had told Kairi how many miles it was. She was on another world, so it meant thousands of miles.

"Yeah…" Was all Sora could muster up.

"W-When…when are you leaving?" Kairi asked, wringing her hands together.

"Two days." The brunette said, swallowing.

"Two days…?" Kairi whispered, tears coming to her eyes. "Why can't you stay, Sora?"

"I wish I could, but I don't have a choice." Sora glanced over at Kairi and sighed. "Don't cry, Kairi." He said, pulling her into a hug.

"It's not fair…everything, everything was supposed to work out." Kairi said between loud sniffles.

"I know, I'm sorry." Sora whispered while rubbing Kairi's back comfortably.

"What am I going to do…?" Kairi asked, pulling away from Sora after a moment.

Sora chuckled and pulled a piece of Kairi's auburn hair behind her ear. "What are you going to do? Kairi you're perfectly capable of living a happy life without me. You don't need me, okay?"

"I…I'm just going to miss you a lot." Kairi whispered, trying hard to hold back a new rush of tears.

"I'm going to miss you a lot too." Sora said, finishing off their conversation for the day. They were both content to keep quiet, in each others arms, watching the sunset fade away. Because both of them had nothing to say.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"So why are we here?" Sora asked, frowning at what the social worker in front of him was saying. It was the next day and Sora had barely had any sleep after staying up half the night with Kairi.

"The Wakayama's need to relinquish their guardian…and parent, rights over you two."

"But why are we here?" Sora asked again. "I don't see why we have to be here." He said, referring to himself and the timid looking Riku behind him.

"Riku's parent's wanted to see him." The cop started, "And you…well I really don't know why you're here."

Sora rolled his eyes and turned to Riku who looked away before their eyes could meet. "Riku?"

"Yeah?" Riku said softly, fiddling with the sleeves of his black hoodie.

"Are you going to be okay?" Sora asked, looking the silver haired boy over. Riku looked downright drained and depressed. Not to mention anxious. Riku nodded in response, walking over to the hallway the cop was gesturing to.

The hallway led down to a single door that looked like it was built out of solid steal. The cop opened the door and stepped inside.

"You have three minutes." The cop said to the woman, ushering Riku into the room.

"Hey kid?" The cop said, before shutting the door.

"Yeah?"

"I'll be monitoring you guys through this mirror. You won't be able to see me, but I can see you. I can hear what you guys are talking about too. If she says anything inappropriate, I'll stop her. If you get uncomfortable at all, just wring the little bell next to your chair and I'll come in."

"Okay…" Riku whispered, turning away from the cop. The cop sighed and rubbed his forward before he closed the door. Despite dealing with cases like this almost everyday, he still felt sympathy for the many kids who had to go through seeing their parent's locked up.

"Mom?" Riku said quietly, looking at the woman across the table from him before sitting down.

"Hey sweetie." The woman said, giving him a small smile. "I'm…I'm so sorry about this."

Riku nodded and looked down at the table, pulling the arms of his hoodie. "How long do you have here?" He asked after a few seconds.

"Four years." The woman said slowly. "That's not so long…"

"It is for me mom…I'll be twenty one when you get out."

"I know…" The woman said sighing. "Being here for just a few weeks has made me think about all that I missed-"

"Please…" Riku interrupted. "Please don't. I have to tell you something, Mom."

"What is it?" Riku's mom said with a puzzled look on her face.

"I…It's my fault you're here."

"Oh that's not possible, Riku. One of the neighbors probably heard…what went on." Riku's mother said quickly, pulling one of the bright orange sleeves on her prison uniform. She then absently picked on one of the handcuffs she was wearing, waiting for Riku's answer.

"No. I called 911…I did it."

Riku's mother's eyes opened wider and a look of disgust appeared on her face. Riku knew it would happen. He knew she would become furious and hate him. That's why he wanted to stop her from saying anything kind before he told her this.

"You called? You put me in this situation?!" The woman yelled, banging her fist on the table. "You little shit, I should've guessed!"

Riku cringed and hit the button on the table signaling for the police man, even though he could already hear the man approaching the door.

"I'm not sorry mom." Riku said quietly, before the door opened with a bang and the police man walked in.

"Come on kid, we're done here." He said, grabbing Riku's arm. "And you shut the hell up!" He yelled at the fuming woman.

"Go to hell you little bastard!" The woman shrieked as Riku and the police man exited the room. The cop quickly led Riku out of the hallway leading to the room and back into the open space of a supposed waiting room.

"You okay, kid?"

Riku nodded, but sat down on one of the metal chairs in the room and closed his eyes, covering his face with his hands to hide the stream of tears making their way down his face.

The cop sighed and sat down beside him. "Here's a tissue." He said, handing a tissue from one the side tables to the silver haired boy.

"Thanks." Riku said taking the paper from the man. "I…I don't want to see my dad…I know he'll be worse…j-just…just tell him what I told my mom. Tell him I love him too…and, tell my mom that too, please." He said, standing up. "I'll be back in a minute."

A few minutes later, from the men's bathroom, Riku could here angry yelling that could only be his fathers. Leaning against the bathroom wall, Riku let the tears fall. This time he didn't wipe them away.

"Hey kid?" Riku heard the cop say from outside the bathroom door.

"Y-yes?"

"They signed the papers…unless you want to know what your father said, and I suggest you don't, you're free to go…"

"Okay…" Riku said. Grabbing a tissue, he dried his eyes and exited the bathroom, nodding to the cop before heading toward the exit of the prison.

Once outside, Riku made his way over to the small park across the street. Sitting down on one of the many steps that led to a huge fountain on top of a hill, Riku closed his eyes. All he wanted to do right now was stay here. Here where the wind blue and the birds chirped and no one was there to interrupt him. Here where his parents didn't hate him, where the world didn't hate him, where he didn't hate himself.

However, all good things come to an end. Riku's peace ended when he heard someone sit down beside him.

"Don't say you're sorry." Riku said, keeping his eyes closed. "You shouldn't be sorry…"

"I know, but I should…in a way." Sora answered, playing with an old leaf that was sitting on one of the steps.

"It's their fault they're in there. Not yours." Riku stated, opening his eyes to look at the brunette.

"It's not yours either." Sora answered his statement.

"I deserve it." Riku said with a dry chuckle.

Sora nodded his head no in response to this. "No kid deserves to have their parents taken away from them. I especially know this."

"They weren't good parents…"

"But they were your parents, and it still hurts, bad or good."

"I wish…I wish I didn't do it…but I'm glad I did…It's like I'm stuck in the middle."

"Everyone can see that. If I were in your spot, I'd feel guilty." Sora said through a sigh.

"I just wish they didn't hate me." Riku said weakly. "I wish they could see where they messed up…"

"That's their issue, not yours." Sora said quietly. They both stayed in silence for awhile, both lost in their own thoughts.

"I want to thank you," Sora started, after a few minutes of thinking over what he was going to say. "I know you're upset about this…but, thank you for…well saving me."

"I…don't thank me. It was kind of like…just something that had to be done."

"But you did it…and I thank you for that."

"It's…" Riku started, "You're welcome…"

A few minutes passed before either of them said anything. They knew that they had to settle something between them, but neither knew how.

"I guess…I guess we're kind of in the same boat now." Riku said, glancing over at the gothic brunette.

"Yeah…kind of sucks, huh?" Sora said through a chuckle.

"Hell yeah." Riku said sighing. "You know I…I hope that we can…I don't know, maybe…start over?"

Sora looked at Riku and nodded. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. We're both headed towards the same place and neither of us know anyone where we're going…it'll be good to have…a friend."

Riku nodded and gave a small smile. "Yeah, it would."

Sora gave a small smile in return and stood up, holding his hand out to Riku. "We leave tomorrow…I guess we better head over to the house and start packing."

Riku nodded once more and grasped Sora's hand while standing up. Both boys were silent as they walked over to where their car was parked. Though a look of sadness was upon both of their faces, part of them was happy. Because for the first time there was peace between them. And even though the world they had both known no longer existed and chaos was sure to follow them like shadows, there was a small measure of peace. Even if it was only a little, it existed.

Because little things, little changes. They can do big things in time.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

And like hate and love are opposites, so are you and me. But let's put aside our differences and get rid of the anger inside us. Because tomorrow we leave for a new world and its only you and me. I'd like to know I have someone to trust, like you'd like to know you have someone to talk to. We both wish it didn't have to be this way and we both regret so many things. But if I can say that one good thing came out of this I'd say its you and me. Because who knew friendship could come from utter chaos? I'd say that's the first step in finding peace.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: ….Yeah, don't like this chapter. Anyway, hope you guys like it. Only three more to go. I have two of those already written (the last two) so I have one more chapter to write. Yay! (I'm sick of this story to be honest with you) Anyways, see you next time!

Peace.


	38. The End: Leaving With Peace In His Heart

A/N: Here we are! Last real chapter of the story. I'm kind of proud of this chapter (and I will be really angry if any of you hate it! Jk…but yeah, I will kind of be upset…but I can't control your feelings)

Anyway, it's really long…it took awhile. And I'm posting it really late. When I post things late, people tend not to review…but oh well. Here you go.

No beginnings and endings for this chapter. The chapter says it all. :)

P.S. If there are spelling and grammar errors, please note. I'm posting this at 12:00 Am and I started at 10:30 PM so…yeah.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The air felt wet that day. There was no fog to be seen and no humidity in the air. The sky was a turquoise blue and the sun was shining like it had in the summer. The trees were turning green and the last traces of the mysterious snow storm were disappearing. Yet the air felt wet. Salty wet.

It wasn't like the ocean had sprayed them, and it wasn't like they'd sprinkled the water in the air with salt. It tasted kind of like tears. Tears of sympathy, regret, happiness, and fear. Yes, the air felt salty wet that day, and for several days after it would remain that way.

Looking out over the city a brunette boy and his blonde brother sat thinking. Neither of them knew what to make of their situation. They had just became friends, were just starting to get to know the other, and then something had to happen. It seemed almost cruel. As a matter of fact, it was.

"It sucks…you know. It's like, we were just starting to be friends…brothers, actually." The blonde said out loud to his brother.

"True that." Sora answered, staring out over the tops of the buildings. The boys had decided to meet one last time before Sora and Riku departed. They had chosen to meet on top of a skyscraper. Sora had chosen it, yet Roxas had no idea as to why.

"It's not fair. You should have a say as to where you're going." The blonde picked at his watch after saying this. Up until the past few weeks he hadn't felt much towards his twin brother. However as the term 'brother' sunk in, their relationship started to mean much more than what it started out as.

"I know…but then again, where would I go?" Sora said through a sigh. "Besides, Aeris…she's always been there for me you know, even though she's so far away."

"I guess…but, when will you come back?" Roxas asked, searching his brother's ocean blue eyes that were identical to his.

Sora looked over at his brother and noticed the sadness in his eyes. He didn't want to answer him, because he didn't have an answer. Truth was, Sora didn't want to go, and he didn't want to stay. He was so tired of his life. Tired of being beat down, bullied, and told he wasn't worth a second's breath. He was tired of waking up in the house that was never really a home, tired of walking the streets of rejection and looking into the eyes of people who loved to shatter hearts. He was tired of living the life the world had created for him. He was tired of living the life _ he _had created for himself. He wanted to start over. A new place, a new start.

"I don't know." Sora finally answered, lying back on the black stone concrete to look up at the blue sky. "I really don't know."

Roxas nodded, not really understanding Sora's attitude towards leaving. He decided to put the questions about it out of his head and focus on something different. Suddenly, a question came his mind. Something that he had been wanting to know for a long time.

"Sora, what happened the day our parent's died?" He asked, looking down into the others dark eyes.

Sora looked back up at him and then closed his eyes while taking a deep breath. "You don't really want to know Roxas. We were about to turn six when it happened…I shouldn't remember much from when I was six…but I'll never forget what happened."

"I'd rather have you tell me about what happened then read about it when I turn 18." Roxas said a bit curtly. He was tired of people hiding the truth from him. He deserved to know and he wanted to know now.

"I already told you they were shot. You too. That's all you really need to know." Sora snapped, sitting up and wrapping his arms around his legs while resting his chin on his knees.

"But how? Why?" Roxas prodded, growing angry. "I want to know, Sora. Today you're going to leave…and I don't know if we're ever going to see each other again. I want to know what happened…I want to know why we're sitting here today, being separated again."

"…I'm not ready to tell you…what I did. But, well Mom had an affair. Our real dad was they guy who shot you Mom and Dad. We have a fortune…millions, billions, I don't know…I guess that's what he wanted."

Roxas nodded, trying to take in the news as discreetly as he could. He didn't want to act crazy and upset Sora, the boy was already apprehensive about this conversation.

"You know," Roxas started with a chuckle, "I always imagined Mom to be perfect…"

"Dad made mistakes too…I mean, the Dad I thought was my Dad." Sora said quietly, "Dad favored you…Mom favored to think of it, Dad didn't spend much time with Mom."

Roxas nodded. "I guess they weren't perfect…"

"Perfect or not though, I'd give anything to have them as my parents again." Sora finished off, more to himself than to Roxas.

"I wish I could say the same but…"

"You don't have to explain it, Roxas, your parents, the one's you have now…they're what you know. It's best not to think much on your birth Mom and 'Dad'"

"But I want to…I want to remember everything I missed." Roxas said softly, pulling his knees up into the same position Sora was sitting in.

Sora put his hand in his messenger bag that was sitting next to him and rummaged about for a second before producing a flash drive. "Heh…it has a bunch of family videos on it. Be forewarned that we were one annoying pair of twins." He said before handing Roxas the drive.

"Thanks." Roxas said taking the drive. "I appreciate it."

Sora smiled and nodded. "No problem."

The two sat on the roof for the next half hour saying nothing. Both knew that the when the clock struck 10 AM Sora would leave to finish getting ready and say goodbye to a few other people. Just as they were thinking this, the large clock tower standing in the middle of the city struck 10 and both boys stood.

"Well um…I guess it's time to go." Sora said, pulling his messenger bag onto his shoulder. "It was nice…seeing you again, after so long."

"It was nice meeting you." Roxas answered in reply. As awkward as he knew it would be, Roxas leaned forward and gave Sora a quick and barely there, hug. Pulling back he blushed and rubbed the back of his head nervously. "Yeah um…I'm gonna miss you man."

"I'm going to miss you too." Sora said, giving the boy a quick smile before turning to walk down the steps back into the building. He was about to descend the stairway when he stopped and turned back towards the blonde.

"I'm going to come back…sometime in the future, I will. I still have things to tell you…and well, this is my home." Sora stated, rubbing his arm. "We'll meet here when I get back…I'll call you."

"I'll keep my ringer on then." Roxas said with a nod, before Sora turned away. It would be the last he'd see of him for the next four years.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Sora, wait up!" A small voice from the behind the gothic teen rang out.

Sora turned to see a small raven headed girl running to him. He couldn't help but smile in spite of himself. It was Willa, and he was surprised she hadn't forgotten about him.

"Hey Willa." He greeted, looking down at the small hyper child below him.

"Where are you going?" The six year old asked, looking up at him while squinting because of the sun's glare. Sora noticed this and knelt down to her eyelevel.

"I'm…I'm going away, I'm moving."

"Huh? Moving? Why?" Willa asked, her lips turning from a smile to a frown.

"Because I have to, my guardian says so."

"B-But…you're my best friend!" Willa whined, stamping her little foot into a random puddle which caused the filthy water splash up into both hers and Sora's face.

"You're my friend too Willa, but sometimes…sometimes things like this happen."

"How long are you gonna be gone…are you coming back?" The little girl asked hopefully. Sora sighed and rubbed his forehead. Why did it seem like everyone was asking this same question? Why did it feel like he was wanted? It was an odd sensation.

"I don't know…maybe." Sora said quickly. "No, I will come back. And when I do, I'll come see you."

"You won't forget my address, will you?" Willa said, looking at him sternly. "And remember my last name too, I might move somewhere else."

"Of course not, I'll remember." Sora said with a smile.

"And you'll remember that we were friends, right? You'll remember to come back, because if you don't, I'm gonna…well I'm gonna…I'm gonna track you down!" The small girl yelled, crossing her arms. "So don't forget about me."

"I won't, I promise." Sora said genuinely, he gave her a quick hug before patting her on the head. "I've got to go now, I'll see you when I come back."

Willa nodded and smiled before kicking him in the shin. "Bye!" She yelled, running off into the direction of her home, leaving a slightly unnerved Sora behind trying his best not to cuss at the little running figure.

"That's one strong kid." A slightly accented voice said from behind Sora. Sora looked up and turned to see a smiling Namine who was nervously wringing her hands.

"Uh…hey…" Sora said, raising his eyebrows in question. 

"I wanted to talk to you…just for a minute, before you left."

"Um sure…the park is just across the street." Sora said the puzzled look still on his face.

Once seated on a bench in the quiet park, Namine turned to Sora and swallowed before starting to speak.

"Um…I wanted to start off with an apology. I know I don't deserve any forgiveness…I've done some mean things…no, cruel things to you…and I'm truly sorry."

Sora studied the blonde in front of him. Right now she looked like she had so many years ago when they were friends. He'd often wondered if she'd ever remember their time spent together, yet he didn't think that would ever happen.

"I forgive you." He said simply, letting go of any hard feelings he had towards her. Now wasn't the time for hatred. Here she was apologizing, and the only right thing for him to do was accept it, despite the pain he still felt in his heart.

"I…um, wow. I didn't really expect that." Namine said nervously, blushing. "I was actually hoping you'd yell at me…"

"Why would I want to yell at you?" Sora asked, "You've apologized, and knowing you…being stubborn as hell most of the time, that must've taken a lot of wit."

Namine giggled a bit at his words and sighed. "You remembered me…from so long ago."

"How could I forget you? You were my best friend during that time in my life?" Sora answered, looking deeply into her eyes. "I could never truly hate anyone that was once my friend…no matter what they did."

"But…that was so long ago and everything. You could've changed your mind."

"You were important, if only for being there. You helped me…so no, the years don't make a difference."

Namine nodded and smiled sadly at his words. "I missed out on such a good friend. I feel guilty…forgetting you."

"Guilt kills people. Don't stress over it." Sora stated, picking at a leaf that feel onto his lap.

"I know…its stupid saying this because you're leaving but…I hope that…we can be something different, if only just for peace between us."

"Looks like we've got it right now." Sora said with a small smile. "We're not fighting and well…it kind of feels like old times."

Namine smiled brightly and played with the hem of her white dress. "Are you going to come back?" She asked after a moment. "I would hate to have had this conversation and then never see you again.

Sora looked at her and his smile faltered. She was the third person that day that had asked him if he was going to come back. It almost felt surreal. It actually felt like they cared about him. Deeply. And the feeling, that surreal feeling, burned his heart.

"Yes, I'm going to come back…someday, I will." He said, standing up. "I promise."

Namine smiled and nodded. "Good, I'll be seeing you later then."

"Yeah, see you Nami." He said, adding the nickname he had given her so long ago. This brought a truly genuine smile upon Namine's face. They were friends again, and it felt good.

Just like old times.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hey Riku, I'm going out for about an hour. I'll be back in time to leave for the airport." Sora yelled, grabbing his hoodie.

"Okay, see you in a bit." Riku said in a sorrow filled voice. Sora heart dropped a little at the tone of his ex-foster brother's voice. Riku was thoroughly depressed and Sora couldn't do anything about it. The boy had spent the whole day either packing or laying on his bed with the stereos blasting his favorite bands and rap artists, while not listening to a word of it.

Sora decided to put the thought of Riku out of his head and instead focus on where he was going. He had to see Kairi one last time, it was an absolute must.

Upon reaching her house, Sora quickly walked up to her doorstep knowing he had less than an hour to say goodbye to her.

"Yes?" Kairi's mom said, looking the boy over when she opened the door.

"Um, yeah…Is Kairi there?"

"No, she's at the beach. May I ask who you are?"

"Uh…just a friend…I was going to um, tell her about something that was due at school." Sora lied, not wanting to waste anytime talking to Kairi's mother who he was sure was about to fight him.

"Whatever…" The woman said with a sigh, closing the door. Sora rolled his eyes and ran back to his car; he'd have to race to get to the beach before he ran out of time.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Pulling up into the small dirt parking lot near the beach, Sora got out and checked his watch. He had only twenty minutes to talk to her. Grabbing his keys Sora walked quickly down he winding road to the vast opening of the beach. Searching the area, he tried to locate Kairi and after five minutes of searching in vain he finally located her leaning a against a palm tree.

From where he was, Sora knew Kairi couldn't see him. Seeing the look on her eyes, he almost felt like disobeying his social worker so as to stay behind while the plane left without him. However, he knew he'd be caught anyway. It wasn't worth it.

Walking up behind her, Sora wrapped his arms around her waist as he was accustomed too. It was always like that. They never seemed to hug face to face, it was always one behind the other so as they could see exactly what the other was seeing. Right now, Kairi was staring at the sunset, tears threatening to run down her face.

"Why did you come?" She asked, trying hard not cry and make Sora feel guilty.

"Because I had to see you before I left…" Sora stated, moving his arms from her waist and then holding her hands in his.

"I wish you didn't come…" Kairi chocked out, tears running down her face. "I wish you didn't come…" She said louder, turning around and burying her face in Sora's shoulder.

Sora didn't say anything to this. He had no answer for her reasoning. He simply wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pressed a kiss onto her forehead.

Kairi sniffled and then bit her lip. "I shouldn't have said that…" She said, wiping her eyes.

"Naw, I understand."

"No, really. I shouldn't have said that. I'm glad you came…" She whispered, pulling away from Sora and then pulling them both onto the sand. Once seated, she leaned over and laid her head on Sora's shoulder.

"It's beautiful…the sunset." She said, intertwining her and Sora's fingers.

"Heh, you know how stupid, corny, and overused it is but," Sora started, "It's not as beautiful as you are."

Kairi giggled and shoved Sora before she settled back down and laid her head back on his shoulder.

"You think I'm beautiful?" She asked, looking up into his dark blue eyes.

"Why wouldn't I?" Sora answered her question with his one. He gave her a quick peck on her nose and smiled when she blushed a deep shade of red.

Kairi smiled again but then frowned. "You're going to move on, Sora."

"Huh?" Sora said looking down at her. "What do you mean?"

"Don't be silly. Today's the end of us, we both know that." Kairi stated firmly, despite the fact that inside she was breaking down.

Sora didn't want to admit to what she was saying, but he knew she was right. It was true. They wouldn't stay together. Sora would be gone for a minimum of two years, until he graduated high school. They wouldn't last with e-mailing and phone calls. They would grow apart and it would be harder to break up then than to do it now when no uneasy feelings were between them.

"I know." He said quietly, "I just wish…I wish it didn't have to be this way."

"Me too." Kairi said sighing, tears coming back to her eyes. "You were the first person at this school…who didn't backstab me or…hate me for no reason. It's hard to lose…your best friend." She said softly.

Sora couldn't help it. A single tiny tear made it's why out of his eye and landed right on Kairi's nose. Kairi looked up and couldn't help but giggle despite the fact.

"I didn't mean to make you cry, Sora." She said after giggling.

"Oh Kairi…" Sora just sighed, giving her a tight hug. "I'm going to miss you so much."

Kairi smiled and let the tears slip down her face once again. "I'm going to miss you too." She said hugging him.

And they both knew it was over. Their time for now was finished, and years would pass before they would see each other again. They both didn't understand it. And it didn't seem fair. But they didn't know the future, and they couldn't understand how this would all play out. They were too young, too inexperienced, and to afraid to look past the horizon. It would take years for them to fully understand why. It would take time

As Sora walked away, Kairi felt as if she was losing a piece of her heart. She knew that this would be the last time she saw _her_ Sora. When he came back, if he came back. He would be different. She knew that. And it hurt to know that. But deep down, she was happy. Because it was what he needed, what he deserved.

He needed a new life. He needed a new beginning. A fresh start. And if that meant herself being left out of the picture, so be it.

They say that when you're in love; the only thing you want is for the other to be happy. And Kairi knew that they were right.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: So there we have it…basically the end. Hope you guys enjoyed it! The other two chapters will be up very soon because they are already done, so stay posted!

Love to all my reviewers! You guys rock!

Peace


	39. Epilogue

A/N: Hey again so soon. Well since school is quickly picking up, I decided to post this a bit earlier than I had wanted to. I'll post the last chapter relatively soon too. School is killing me. Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Oh yeah, forgot to mention something. Some people were dissapointed with the last chapter...reallyl dissapointed. Just a word to everyone who was upset. This story started out as realistic, and will stay that way. Love doesn't always win in the end and there is no such thing as 'happily ever after.' That's a sucky story if you ask me. It's overused and not memorable. I have always refrained from making thinks sickly sweet and sappy. I believe in things staying realistic, fiction or not. Please keep this in mind when reading the sequel. I have a feeling it will dissapoint a lot of my reviewers. If you don't like it, don't read it.

Okay...sorry about that. Moving on. Again, hope you enjoy the chapter!

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

_Sometimes I try too hard to understand the mechanics of life. I sit up in the place I call my head and ponder for hours on why we as a people even exist. I'm not sure if there is someone up there watching over us, or someone below exploiting us. All I know is that someone saw me all along. I just wish I knew who it was._

"Aircraft 456 Blooming Wild, ready for take off."

"Could I have everyone buckle their seat belts please? Everyone buckle their seatbelts."

_It's like I'm living up on a cloud far away. And I'm reaching up for heaven and I think I see god smiling back. Maybe it's just my mind playing tricks, I'll never know. But it's a good feeling. The start of many. _

I'm looking out over the runway. In a few seconds it'll be no more. It feels as if a part of my heart is being ripped away as I see her standing in the crowd. I didn't think she'd come, but she did. Everyone else in the crowd knows their loved one will be returning. She doesn't.

Fate is so cruel sometimes. I wish I could fix it, make it better, but I cannot. I can't live here anymore. I have to move on to something new. Something safe. Memories of this place will forever plague me. Most bad, but some good.

_For some, tomorrow is promising. We have new futures, new goals, and new lives to lead. For some we have new hope. New relationships. New futures as two instead of one. _

Two blonde teens stood next to the icy cold water of the ocean holding hands. The boy was smiling and talking loudly, using his spare hand for emphasis. The girl nodded and smiled. She didn't have much to say, but she'd always listen. They didn't know how long their relationship would last. Right now they were taking each day as it was. Solving each new problem together, achieving every new moment side by side.

The next four years would go smoothly. They would both move on to new stages in life but never leave each other. Nobody thought they'd stay together for so long; but they loved to prove people wrong.

Trouble would be coming, though, and neither knew. But for now, everything was peaceful. It was all about them. And they loved it.

_For others though, tomorrow comes with failure. Loneliness and sadness that you try so hard to hide comes out in spurts of grief. Tomorrow is like a rainy day. They rain drops keep falling on your head and you can't escape their wetness. For some, tomorrow brings new mistakes. New problems that we cannot solve. For some, tomorrow is a curse. _

A silver haired boy sat all alone in his dark room. The window shades were shut, but this didn't matter because they night sky was pitch black anyway. Next to him sat his new found friends. A homemade needle that made large scars on his arms and a package of the stuff that made him not feel so alone.

Day after day, night after night, the thoughts of his parents and the world that hated him plagued his mind. They others didn't know, they thought he was just a weird loner who didn't want any company. The one person who cared, however stood by him. Like the silver hair boy had stood by him before.

It would take two years before he finally threw away whatever pride he had left and entered a rehabilitation center. The rehab fixed his addiction, but it couldn't fix his heart.

_And for others, tomorrow is uncertain. Tomorrow is unpredictable. They do not know what they will find. Sometimes they will find luck, and sometimes they will find misfortune. They hold neither a positive nor a negative view on the future. They see it as it is. Just there._

A red headed girl in a light pink summer dress sits swinging on a tree. She watches as little children play below her. She smiles at a little boy with chocolate spikes, yet she turns away. Stopping her swinging, she jumps off and walks back towards town, away from the busy beach.

Upon reaching the town, she meets up with one of her new found friends and smiles as he once again shows off to her with his skateboarding skills. The girl knew he liked her. He was always trying to make her smile. Trying to make her forget about the boy who left months ago. The boy she hadn't heard from since.

The girl would pretend she had forgotten him. She didn't want to live in the past forever. She knew she had to move on.

That night she and that friend went out on a date. She had to admit she had fun, but the feeling wasn't there. It was like all things she experienced now. She didn't know what was best for herself. She didn't know who she was.

It would take years before she fully understood. Years before she could stand up and let the world hear her voice. And it would be exactly four years till she saw her chocolate haired friend again. And even when she'd see him, she wouldn't know what to feel.

_However for me, tomorrow is forever. Tomorrow is my future. My chance to show the world how I've changed. Tomorrow is when I prove to myself that I'm not worthless. That my life is worth living after all. _

"Um, I'm here to see Aeris Gainsbourg."

"Your name?"

"Sora W-…I mean, Sora Donaven." I say firmly, loving the sound of using my given last name.

"Right this way." The receptionist says, stepping out from behind the desk and beckoning me to follow her down a long hallway. I can hear the sounds of the other students in the dinning hall. I can't help but shiver a bit in fear. New places have always frightened me.

I wait for a second as the receptionist enters the large oak door that we have come to stand before. I wait nervously, looking around at my surroundings. Aeris was right, this school was very beautiful.

"Come right in." The receptionist says, interrupting my study of the interior. I nod and step inside the brightly lit room. I look around nervously, not seeing my dear god mother anywhere.

"Sora?" I then hear her say. My body is flooded with relief as I see her enter through a door on the left side of the large room. I can't help it, I run to her, dropping my bags aside. She pulls me into a hug like she always used to, running her hands through my hair like my own mother did when I was young.

This time there is nothing between us. My secret I no longer have to bear. Her worry she no longer has to carry. The world is almost perfect right now, because for the first time in ten years, I feel _safe_.

"I missed you." I hear her say softly. And the world is silenced for once.

_So when you see me smile for the first time please know that I'm alright. Tomorrow is something that should be wholesome and fair. And for now I'll always be looking at it with the glass half full, even if it looks completely empty. Take my word and don't see the world with hatred in your heart. I couldn't for there is an underlying meaning that I've learned to accept. _

"I missed you too…" I finish. And the world will finally listen.

_And if you're wondering what it is...I don't have an answer for you. I just respect it._

_XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX_

Signed and finished by Sora Donaven, February 22nd

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The End.

For now.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

So yeah...It's almost over. Hope you liked it. Love you guys! Oh yeah, remember to **review**!

Peace


	40. The Fallen Portrait

A/N: I was going to post the last chapter on Sunday, but my homework is just so much that I better do it now. Here we are guys. The last chapter. I really can't believe it's all over. I'm actually quite sad. However, it's about time it ended.

I'd personally like to thank a few individuals on this site who have really made writing this story worth it. I've left comments for you guys at the bottom. For the rest of you, you all rock! Even those…who didn't…review my story (One would've been nice, but oh well). I love you guys! Most of the people I listed on at the bottom have been here reviewing my story for awhile, don't think that I like them better than you. I love you all.

Note: **Add me to your author's alerts**! You won't know when the sequel comes out if you don't.

Lastly, this chapter is based off the song Life is Beautiful by SIXX:am. It's a really beautiful song and I suggest everyone listen to it right after you read this. Or at least read the lyrics. It really goes well with the story and gives the story a very…finished feel. So check up on it!

Now, on to the last chapter. –cries-

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It's been awhile since I've last looked at a flower. Until now I've never taken then time to see what a beautiful creation it is. Very few people in this world take in the detail of simple things. We're all about the new, the big, the exciting, and the better. Yet, when all we have left, when all of what we've known has disappeared. When the people we trust have turned away from us. When the home we've lived in all our lives has been locked, the key thrown away, and the lock changed. When we can no longer access our peace, our inner calm. When we can't hear the voice that subconsciously tells us everything is okay.

We end up looking. We search for something that will bring comfort to our hearts. Something that will bring peace. Something that will take away the pain if only for a minute. It's the simple things that we always search for. It is because they are simple and easy to understand. Not complicated and complex life like.

Standing here, in this funeral home at my parent's grave for the first time, I see something. I see something in the red rose I hold. It's so small and delicate standing up to the tall black pieces of granite. Yet, it stands straight. Tall and proud. As if it were to watch over my parent's buried souls until it died itself.

I look over across the field of standing rock and granite. Buried souls are here. Everywhere. Their destination to heaven or hell, I will never know. It feels peaceful though. Not horrible, like I was expecting.

In the corner, near a tree, I see a crowd. People wearing black, all of them holding white tissues that stood out against the darkness. It is faint, but their cries of sadness float to great me with sorrow.

I hear a woman start to speak. She sounds familiar, like a voice I haven't heard in a very, very, long time. She is stumbling over her words, barely audible. A man walks up and puts his arm around her shoulder. I watch her from afar, taking deep breaths before clearing her throat. Then she speaks.

She speaks about a boy. Her boy. Who didn't and couldn't see how precious his life really was. Everyone assumed that her boy was okay. That he'd keep laughing at jokes made at his own expense. That he'd take whatever cruel comments that came his way. That he'd stand right back up after he fell; even though both his legs were broken. They assumed so many things about her boy. But they never assumed that maybe, maybe this hurt him. They didn't see him as a person, and in turn he couldn't see it himself. He ran from his life.

Ignoring the few people who cared, he finally put an end to his suffering one night. And beside him, where he lay bleeding from a knife to his throat stood those who cared. Those who cried and those who would never forget his tear-ridden face. Those were the people who would never forget him.

I start to walk forward as she finishes. It's almost sick to see the boy's entire school there. The tears of guilt and shame on their faces. The fact that they couldn't realize their mistake before it was too late. That nobody realized the mistake.

As I near the crowd, people step back. It is as if I am in a daze. As I near the coffin, I tremble. Nobody stops me from looking. They're all watching, holding their breaths. I turn slowly to face the crowd and gasp suddenly, air quickly leaving my shocked body. Every person's face I know. Every face I drew in my sketchbook when I was trying hard to understand from their facial expressions, the reasons behind their motives. Their life, love and pain.

The crowd holds my loved ones and my enemies. Every single one of them with tears running down their faces. Turning back to the coffin I look up at the woman who was previously speaking. My mother's beautiful dark blue eyes stare back. Eyes almost identical to mine. I try to open my mouth to speak but I cannot make any words come out. My mother smiles and touches my hand. Grasping it gently, she then lets go, moving her hand to rest on the edge of the coffin lid.

It feels like an eternity of quietness. Of fear or of relief. And now it feels like death. Not a sense of peace in the atmosphere. Looking down I merely swallow slowly.

I stare at myself, my eyes closed tight and my face white and pale with death. And they say 'rest in peace.' My eyes, they betray those words. My face shows agony. And nothing more. I hadn't escaped a single thing. I had merely cut myself off from help. In death I would spend my entity alone. Forever alone.

Looking up into my mother's eyes I can say nothing. For I have nothing to say.

Suddenly, the sun comes out from behind the clouds. As if the sun where wiping them away, the crowd begins to disappear into nothingness. I look back to my mother, unbeknownst to the tears flowing down my face. I only muster up enough courage to ask one question. A question that I was certain she couldn't answer.

"What does this mean?"

And she smiles. She smiles at me, like she did ten years ago. And she smiles as she floats away, leaving me once again, all alone.

Suddenly I find myself standing in front of two granite gravestones. A single rose in my hand. I can still see her smile.

In confusion, I drop the rose and turn to leave. I do not know what just happened, but I want to get out of here as fast as I can. As I take a step forward, I stop as I notice something falling from the sky. It appears to be a small piece of paper. As it lands on the ground, I bend to pick it up. I don't really have a reason for it, I was just curious.

It is envelope, in fact. Picking it up, I open the dilapidated object. Inside I gasp to see a portrait of myself. It was made 10 years ago, a few days before my parent's death. Taped to the portrait is a small note. And written in scraggily print, the very beginnings of my handwriting, were these words.

_Even when I'm mad,_

_Even when I'm bad,_

_When I'm happy, sad,_

_Or feeling low,_

_Let me always know,_

_That I am special and wanted,_

_And I will never be alone,_

_To Sora from Sora_

And I smile. Because now I know. And for some reason, here in this graveyard, I feel something that I haven't felt in a very long time. I feel _alive_.

Walking out of the graveyard and towards the exit, I hear a voice.

"Hey there." An elderly gardener says, smiling and waving a dirt speckled glove.

"Hey." I answer, giving him a small smile back.

"Beautiful day huh?" He says, plucking a few weeds from the ground.

"Sure is." I answer.

"Makes you feel good about being alive. Life truly is beautiful." He finishes, turning back to his work.

This time, even though he wasn't looking, I give a genuine smile.

And looking down at my fallen portrait, I answer him.

"Yeah," I whisper. "Yeah it is."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The End

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Here's the summary for the sequel. It's longer than it will be when I post it, so…yeah.

You should expect the sequel in about two or three weeks at the least.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Who We Are (Title subject to change) - Four years have passed and Kairi is nervously preparing to start college, alongside accomplishing other personal goals. It's summer vacation and to everyone's surprise, Sora returns. But he's changed so much that Kairi can't even hold a conversation with him. And why does he act like she doesn't exist? And what happens when Kairi finds herself falling for someone she never knew she'd ever like? When Trouble strikes for Namine and Roxas, will they let their relationship fall apart, or will they tough it out like they've always done? And what of Riku, who has just put his life back together but still feels empty inside?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Here are the comments:

I'd first like to thank **Evil Genius Of The COCA**. You were my first reviewer and stuck with me for awhile (lol, though I don't know where you went for the last few chaps) but whatev. You're awesome.

Second I'd like to thank **MalcolmYuy.** Ever since you first started reviewing I've enjoyed your reviews. They were always detailed and sweet, and I like that you always gave your honest opinion. You rock!

**rutger5000**, you're like one of my best friends here. You've reviewed every chapter I've written (which is pretty awesome, lol) but you've been more of a friend than just a reviewer. Love you!

**Alantie Mistaniu**, you're like an older sister. (I love how you call me 'hun', its cute) Thanks for all the hugs and encouragement. You're reviews always make me so happy. :) Thank you again!

**Kupo3.0**, you plain out rock. You're really nice and give long reviews (lol, I love em!) I've always loved receiving your reviews because you always leave detailed ones and tell me your favorite parts. I think of you as one of my best friends on here. :) You're just pretty damn cool.

**DreamedSong**, you're like the coolest kid I know. I've never really succeeded in talking to people a few years younger than me (I don't know…they think I'm weird, lol) But that's different with you. I love your reviews, they're awesome. Keep being cool, okay? You're really fun to talk to.

**CreativeDreamer48**, I missed you! I'm so glad you reviewed the last chapter or so. I've really missed your reviews. You've always left long detailed ones and they were always encouraging. It made me happy to read your reviews when I was upset or depressed. Thanks for being so nice and awesome!

**Typical Sunday**, you're really sweet. You're reviewers always make me happy and not feel so wretched about myself. I consider you one of my good friends on here. It's really hard to come by nice people, so I'm glad that I met you. :)

**aquired.minds**, pretty damn awesome. You rock, and have always made my day with your reviews. I pray that you stick around for the sequel, because I will greatly miss you if you don't.

Anonymous reviewers, **Isler**, you're one of the coolest anonymous reviewers I've ever had review my story. Most leave small comments, or cruel comments. You? Not a bit. You're amazing, I love ya!

**Angelofsweetness**, your pen-name fits you, lol. You're really nice and sweet, one of my favorite reviewers and friends here. Thanks so much for reviewing; your comments really brightened my day!

**snowyleopard**, you're a special person and I worry about you sometimes. I hope things get better for you soon. Thanks so much for reviewing my story, I'm so happy you liked it and that it's helped you. You're one of my favorite people on here. :) –hugs-

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: -cries- I can't believe it's over. It's been fun, seriously. I'd like to thank you all once again for sticking with me even when the story got rough. I love you guys. :)

Remember: **add me to your author's alerts!** I will have no way of letting you guys know when the sequel comes out if you don't.

Till the next production!

Peace.


End file.
